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Chapter 3 Amy's POV
Apparently Ricky and Emily worked it out, which I am supportive of, but to an extent. It's never not painful to see the one person you love, try to be in love with someone else. Anyway, since their reconcile, Ricky's been spending more time with her to bring whatever drama down several notches. He has stuck to seeing John every other day, if not every day, but he doesn't stay as long as he used to. I miss him, but him being happy is important to me and if she makes him happy, I shall set him free. I've been hanging out with Grace more these days, seeing how she is my step-sister now. Her mom and my dad reunited our senior year and got remarried a few months ago. Mom's been hanging with her new girlfriend and Ashley is always with Toby. My family actually gets along more, now that we aren't forced to be one. Today Grace and I are at the mall while Ricky has John for the weekend.
"So what's up? Your mind has been on something else entirely all day?" she asks as we walk into a lingerie store, though I have no idea why.
"Oh, sorry. Just thinking about John and wondering what he's doing," I say shrugging off the question.
"You mean thinking about John and how he's with Ricky? The same Ricky that you are still in love with?" she smirks seeing right through me, but all my senses told me to deny. Deny, deny, deny!
"What?! I'm not in love with Ricky, nor am I thinking about him. What gave you that idea?" I say avoiding eye contact. She just rolls her eyes at my blatant lie.
"Amy, I've known you since we were 15 years old, over the years we've gotten close to the point that I can read you. Now that we are sisters, I know you a little bit more, so don't deny it. Tell me what's going on," she insists. Next thing I know, I am spilling my guts, while she lends a comforting ear to listen. It feels good to get everything out in the open, maybe it will help me get over him.
"I just don't know how I feel these days. I'm happy for Ricky, I really am, but it's a process," I finish my long winded rant.
"Amy, maybe you should give it time. I mean, he's in his longest relationship since you and possibly Adrian. I mean, I know it sucks, but if he's happy, you gotta let him be happy. Who knows what will happen beyond this point. You will always be apart of his life, but who he loves in that way is up to him."
"I know and you're right. He's been spending less time with me and more with her and John and I'm fine with that, I just find myself in this what if stage is all."
"Well, maybe we need to get your mind off of Ricky and Emily, and more on Amy and whoever the lucky guy will be. You've had three boyfriends in your entire life, and two were back and forth for years. It's time to get out there and meet someone. I mean I know you're still in love with Ricky, but there's nothing you can really do about it as of now. I've been talking to this guy, Eric and he has this friend, Caleb and he is too cute for words. Maybe we can do a double date tomorrow night?" I think about it for a second. I can't have the guy I love, it's been over a year since I had a real relationship, and maybe it is time to get back out there. This could be really good for me and for my overall relationship with Ricky.
"Deal. I'll go on the double date," with my agreeing, comes a very hyper and cheerful sister.
"Yes! This is gonna be awesome!" We link arms and head out of the mall not knowing someone was watching us the whole time.
RARARARARARARARARA
Ricky's POV
Everything was going okay with Emily before Amy came back. It's not that I'm not happy she's back, I'm just more conflicted. I'm the guy who's said over and over again about how he doesn't believe in everlasting love, or even being in love, when in reality, I fell for Amy Jurgens the first moment my eyes laid on her. I don't know how, but she broke through my coldness, and it scared the shit out of me so I ran. I ran like a chicken with his head cut off, I ran to Adrian, Grace, and any girl who looked my way. I let my past define me for so long when it came to using people until I didn't need them anymore, but Amy changed that. She made me fall in love, she made me want to dream about the things I used to deem impossible, she gave me my son who is the greatest gift I've ever received. When she left, I didn't know what to feel, but I do know letting her go was the hardest thing I've ever done. When she said I was never in love with her, I gotta admit it broke me, but her wanting to go was all the motivation I needed to lie. I avoided contact after that unless it had something to do with John. The only thing I focused on was my kid, my job, and school. After she left, I kind went into this dark place, but I started therapy again to avoid going too deep, and it helped. Three or so months ago, I met Emily in my Psychology class. We were partnered for a few assignments, and she kept flirting, but I wasn't really interested. Finally, she asked me out after about a month and here we are. I thought being with someone new, committing to someone else, might all at once help me get over Amy and at the same time show me that I really have changed and can be faithful. Emily's great, I mean we don't have much in common, she's two years younger than me, graduated early, and she's kind of stuck up. I mean she's nice enough, but she wants to occupy all of my time, but I have a son who deserves all of my time over anything or anyone. She's a rich kid from the 'burbs, but I thought different could be good. But Amy came back home, and everything I've ever felt towards that girl came back tenfold. I felt the anger, sadness, disappointment, irritation, attraction, and everything in between, including love. I've really enjoyed having her back, in the flesh, but I just knew I was walking on thin ice. I couldn't get so close and feel what I feel. It could end one of two ways, us together or so strained that John would be caught in the middle. I don't know if either of us could handle putting our son through that. As of now I am just sticking it out and hopefully I will get over Amy once and for all if I'm lucky. The problem is, I don't know if I even want to give her up. Today I am watching John at the Jurgens' because Amy said she was going out with Grace tonight. I don't mind and I'm happy that she has something besides John to keep her preoccupied. Just then she walks out of her room in a black strapless thigh high dress, black pumps, and her hair straightened to its full length. What the hell? I was a goner after seeing her with John trailing behind her.
"Wow, Ames! You l-look, you look, wow," I stammer out. "You look amazing Amy."
"Thanks Ricky. Yeah I figured why not, you know. First date in a while so I wanted to dress the part I guess," she informs me. Wait! Date?!
"Date? You're going on a date? I thought you were going out with Grace," I question clearly misreading the evening.
"Double date. She convinced me it was time to get back out there. I mean I've had three boyfriends, one was my fake husband, the other ditched me, and you I had a baby with. Now all of you guys are in committed relationships, and I'm just now. So I figured why not give it a shot," she says while applying red lipstick.
"Wow, I g-guess you're right," I am completely in shock at the situation. I want her to be happy, of course. But do I want her to be dating? I mean if it makes her happy sure. I mean we all have somebody except her. She deserves to have somebody no matter how I'm kind of boiling at the thought of her kissing some other guy, being with some other guy, and them being John's step-dad. What the actual hell?!
"Ricky! Hey, you spaced out on me there. Are you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine."
"Okay, well John give mommy a kiss so she can leave," she says picking up John and hugging and kissing him goodbye. She sets him back down, where he then proceeded to run off to play.
"I'll be back in time to tuck him in. And no worries, you can sleep here tonight so you're not driving so late," she yells as she walks to the door to leave. I am just seating there digesting everything that just occurred in the last few minutes. Amy. Date. Guy. Not me. Holy shit. I am so not ready for this to be happening.
