Still no reviews, but i will not be discouraged. I'm too stubborn and thick headed to be.

Training, Day 1

Three days later found Zack in the special gym usually reserved for the SOLDIERs, 1st Class. It was very, very early in the morning, and the 1st Class SOLDIERs, being the semi-lazy bunch they were, were still in bed (for the most part). He stood in a coma-like haze brought on from lack of sleep.

"Okay, Zackie-boo," the amazingly conscious and cognizant SOLDIER said overly loudly as she smiled what he was sure was evilly at him. "As you already know, Sephy-rock has assigned me to be your mentor/trainer. I'm not any happier about this than you are. But as my pay raise is dependent on you qualifying for SOLDIER 3rd class, I have no choice."

"So let's get started!" She had to be a robot. Yes, that had to be it. No one else could be this functional at four flipping thirty in the morning!

"Essential information: Hojo creepy; Hollander less-creepy-than-Hojo, but-none-the-less-still-creepy; Turks scary; Reno annoying; Tseng not-fun-with-a-hangover; Rude silent; Heidegar fat; Palmer crazy-and-fat; Scarlet super-skank; President Shinra useless-for-anything-not-involving-signing-of-paychecks; Rufus-kun sneaky; Genesis devout-Loveless-fanboy; Angeal serious; Sephy-rock über-scary. Great! Now that that's out of the way, let's get started! You stay right here. I will be back in two minutes."

Sam walked away from him and entered the women's locker room (which was misleading since she was the only 1st class SOLDIER who was a woman; it should really be called 'Sam's locker room').

Zack sighed in relief and sunk to the floor. There was no way he'd be able to do anything she would demand of him. It was way too early in the morning.

Exactly two minutes later, Sam returned. Zack gaped as he saw her enter. Sam had exchanged her clothes for the standard issue pants of SOLDIER in the dark blue color reserved for 1st class. Her loose shirt was gone in favor of a tight, black sports bar. Instead of the heavy boots SOLDIERs typically wore, she was wearing a thin pair of shiny, black pleather boots worn most often by mixed-martial arts fighters. She pulled her hair up into a ponytail, but her bangs still hung framing her face.

What Zack was gapping at, however, was not her clothes.

"How do you have nicer abs than me?"

"These?" she asked, her knuckles rapping over the taunt muscles of her abdomen. (Zack was certain he heard the dull ring of steel.) "Don't worry. It you ever manage to get into Sephiroth's training program, and then survive it, you'll have abs almost as nice as mine."

"Gee, thanks," Zack monotoned.

"Alright, let's get down to business," she smiled brightly (evilly). She reached into her pocket as she said, "I got something for you, Zackie." From her pocket she pulled out a glowing red orb. His eyes widened as she asked, "You know what this is, don't you?"

"Materia," he answered in shock.

"Very good, Zackie," Sam said as if she were speaking to a small child or a dog. "Do you want the materia?"

"I want the materia," Zack answered, his eyes glassy as he reached for the glowing orb.

Sam smirked as she whipped the materia over Zack's spiky head. Zack turned to see it land on top of the strange pillar in the center of the gym that reached almost to the ceiling. He gaped and said, "What are you doing?"

Sam smiled sweetly. "The materia is yours, if you can get it that is."

"Fine," Zack said determinedly. He started walking over to the pillar.

"Wait a second," Sam stopped him.

Zack groaned, instinctively knowing that whatever she wanted now wasn't going to be good. "You need these," she said, pulling two giant medals seemingly out of nowhere. "They represent honor and discipline," she explained. "Both are required, so come and get them."

Rolling his eyes, Zack walked back to her and took the medals out of her hands, and almost immediately fell over. Each medal had to be at least thirty pounds. How was he supposed to climb the pillar with the medals at the same time?

"You can either get that materia or run fifty miles. That's about three hundred, eighty times up and down the stairs from the seventieth floor to the lobby, just so you know. Whatever happens first. When you're finish, we'll move on to step two. Ta," Sam said as she left him standing there with a shocked expression on his face. Whistling some jingle off of a commercial, Sam began her own routine of stretches. He gaped open mouthed at her in shock, but couldn't figure out how to voice his objections.