Detonation
by Roar-Ra
Rating: NC-17 all the way baby!
Keywords: Steve/Natasha, Clint/Natasha, Angst, Smut
Natasha
"Agent Romanov, how do you plead?"
I look up to see Tony Stark seated on a high desk dressed in a black judge's robe complete with a white powdered wig, holding a gavel that looks suspiciously like Thor's hammer. I'm incredibly confused.
"What?"
Tony raps his hammer/gavel and suddenly a courtroom appears around us.
"Answer the question," He demands.
"Plead to what? What are you talking about?"
"Look." He gestures to the prosecutor's table, where Hawkeye and Captain America are seated side by side.
Clint looks at me, love and hurt war for dominance. Steve stares at me with a combination of rage and lust which brings a flush to my cheeks... I can't meet the gaze of either man.
"You know your crime, Agent Romanov. How do you plead?"
"I... I don't know how to make this right. What do they want?"
Tony glares at me as if I'm being incredibly dense. "You, cupcake. Obviously. They both want you, and so far you've done a lame-ass job of satisfying either one."
Leave it to Tony not to mince words... "I'm sorry..."
"Not good enough, Princess."
I look down - I'm wearing a fairy princess ballet costume from a role I once danced in Sleeping Beauty, pink and complete with glittery wand. God damn it.
"Make a choice!"
"I... I can't."
"Grant me a wish, Natasha." Clint is in front of me, taking my hands he kisses the inside of each wrist, I shudder with desire. "Be my partner, in all ways, always. Love me, fight by my side. I'll watch over you and protect you forever. Be my partner."
Steve clutches my shoulders from behind, pulling me against him. "Grant me a wish, Natasha." His harsh whisper makes me bite my lip to repress a moan. "I'm so lost - Give me something to believe in again. Be my girl."
I look at Tony pleadingly, trapped between them. "I can't - I can't choose. I... I love them both."
Tony is suddenly standing next to me, leering. "I don't know, this doesn't look like such a bad situation to be in… if that were you and Pepper, I could die a happy hero." I growl in warning and he laughs.
The humor in his eyes dies and his voice is uncharacteristically solemn. "Grant a wish Natasha. Figure out what you want, before you pull this team apart at the seams. The world is more important that your soap opera sex life."
And with that ominous warning she and the entire courtroom scene vanish.
Steve
I wake to the soft muted sound of her sobs, she's crying in her sleep. Broken words are whispered through the tortured sounds.
Great. You bullied Natasha Romanov in to sleeping with you a second time and now it's broken her heart. A heart you knew belonged to your team mate before you - let's face it - practically forced yourself on her.
I brush the fiery curls back from her cheek. I should go, I should leave and never speak to her again. But instead I wrap myself around her small form and hold her tightly. "Shhh it's ok, Natasha." She will be my undoing. No, not her. My desire for her will be my undoing.
She ducks her head and tries to discreetly to wipe tell-tale tears from her cheeks. I wrap my arms around her tiny form and hold her as she whispers in my chest "I'm sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry about, I'm the one who should be apologizing. My behavior last night was inexcusable." And I'd give up my American citizenship to do it again. "I'm… I'm not good with words, Natasha. So I let my actions speak for me last night. And I can see this morning I pushed you in to doing something you now regret. And for that I'm very, very sorry."
She sits up, now completely alert. "No, Steve - I'm not sorry about what happened last night, last night was..." She hesitates, "I don't have the words for what last night was. But I'm not sorry it happened. I'm only sorry about the situation this has put you in, hurting the team." A moment of hesitation. "Hurting Clint."
"Natasha -" She can't be serious.
"Please, Steve, let me finish. I know how Clint feels, he wears his heart on his sleeve, he has for years. Before I make any decisions, I need to know; how do you feel?"
"Knowing my feelings isn't going to make the situation any easier Natasha, quite the opposite."
"Steve, Please."
"I don't think you want to know..."
"I need to know."
"I..." I shouldn't say it, I shouldn't burden her with this knowledge. "I feel deeply for you - too deeply for your own good. I've tried not to - I know it's completely inappropriate. I wish I were a better man, one who would leave you and Clint to ride off happily in to the sunset together-"
She stops my rambling with a light kiss. "You're a good man, Steve."
"No, I'm not. I think I once was, but now I'm in love with my team mate's girl and I'm not going to play nicely to keep her." Wow, that may have been the most unromantic declaration of love in history.
She smiles, her eyes shining with unshed tears, it's the sweetest, saddest smile I've ever seen "I love you too, Steve, God help us both."
My mind is stuck in a loop, she loves me, she loves me, she loves me - "I'm not like him, Natasha."
"I don't want you to be." She slides her hands across my abs, nails scratching lightly. "Show me Steve, show me how you plan to keep me. Don't play nice."
Oh dear God, it's too late for either of us now. I'm never going to be able to let Natasha Romanov go. I hope she understands this and is willing to forgive me for whatever misdeeds I'll do in order to keep her. "Do you know what you're asking Natasha?" I don't want to scare her - the animal desire she incites scares ME.
I take her head between my hands and kiss her brutally. She moans in appreciation. Rolling her on her back, I pin her wrists above her. Natasha throws her head back as she bites her lip to keep from crying out. I want her to cry out, I want to hear my name on her lips.
I don't understand Clint. How could he ever leave her?
I skim my hands down her rib cage, but she keeps her hands above her head as through they were bound. A sudden primal, overwhelming urge overtakes me. I take a tie off my dresser and pull it taut, then hesitate.
She must see the uncertainty I'm feeling, because she holds out her wrists to me. "It's okay Steve... I want you to..."
All of my previous good intentions go flying out the window - I take the tie and quickly bind her hands to the top of the bed, ravaging her perfect pale neck with rough kisses. A little whimper escapes her lips, drawing my attention to them. The kiss I plant begins gently but deepens as she responds, her tongue darting out to meet mine. I've never tasted anything so sweet as those lips, and when I feel her moan into my mouth, I'm lost. How the hell can she capture me with just a kiss? I'm supposed to be the one in control here, right?
My hand goes to the back of her neck, now taking what I want with bruising force. I'm a little afraid of hurting her as I pin her to the bed with my weight, grinding my erection against her sex, but the sound she makes is not of protest. On the contrary, she lets out a pleased gasp and bucks her hips against mine in response.
"OhmyGodCaptain!"
She writhes in pleasure as I lick my way down her torso. Her breasts are perfection and I pay them the attention they are due, sucking and biting her nipples as my fingers toy with her clit, till she's making noises that would make a nun or very young child think she was in pain.
She's pulling at the bonds and arching against the sheets. "Tell me - What do you want? I want to hear you beg me for it."
She shakes her head, sniffing in contempt. She plays this game very well. "Never!"
This gives me the perfect excuse to pull away before I lose all control. I want this to last and if she keeps writhing under me it's not going to.
She makes a delightful mewing sound of disappointment as I lift myself up above her. "Tell me what you want, and I'll do it." I trail kisses along her stomach as she shakes her head. My hand continues down till it reaches the tempting dark curls, playing with them as I continue taunting her.
"I want to spend hours mapping your body, finding what makes you gasp." I tug the curls lightly and she bites down on her lower lip to keep silent. "...or moan." My finger slides down between those pretty lips easily finding her slick swollen clit, I watch her arch with pleasure as I circle it with lightly. "...or come." Now I dip my head to her sex. Keeping her hips still with one hand, I stare at the glistening lips. I'm trying not to pant like one of Pavlov's dogs at the sight. I force myself to only lick once - a light caress of my tongue over her swollen clit. I don't want her to come. Not yet. The sound she makes is a half whimper, half growl. "But I won't do it. Not unless you ask me first."
She's unwilling to admit defeat yet. I admire that, if our situations were reversed I hate to think how quickly she could reduce me to begging; which is not to say she's unaffected by my ministrations. "Steve (hitched breath), you arrogant (gasp) over-muscled ... (gasp) - son of a... (a high moan as I nibble on the inside of her thigh) BITCH!"
I chuckle and suck gently at her clit till it is completely exposed. She is mewing as I blow lightly on the overheated flesh.
"Oh God! Captain, you bastard!"
I smile. I'm rather proud of the fact that I have the Black Widow reduced to calling me names. I really am a Neanderthal. I wet my thumb with her arousal, circling her clit slowly. I quicken the movements until she's on the edge of orgasm, then stop just before she comes, repeating the process until she's incoherent with desire.
She is the epitome of every depraved male-chauvinist fantasy - this beautiful girl, bound and begging for release as her perfect body writhes in exquisite agony.
I should feel like a pig. I feel like a God (is this what it feels like to be Thor? His bravado is suddenly much more understandable).
"Steve... Please... I need to... "
"You have to say it Natasha. I won't give it to you unless you ask."
I raise myself up till the head of my cock is resting against her entrance, but I refuse to give in to what we both want so badly. I need this victory. I need it to know she's mine. "Tell me you want this. Beg me, Natasha!" I use my harshest, most desperate tone. It works; something in her breaks, and she's mine.
"Please, Steve! Please... I want you... I need you to..."
"What do want me to do?" I press just the head of my cock inside her - fuck, she's tight - then fight every instinct to keep going and pull out again.
"Is that what you want?"
"Yes! That's what I want... Please. Fuck me."
That's what I was waiting to hear. "Good girl."
Her eyes widen with indignation at my words, then close tight as I enter her. I meant to make the first stroke slow and sweet; too bad my body isn't obeying anymore. My cock has had enough of the slow torment and now knows only that it is finally allowed access to the hot, sweet heaven of her body. The initial thrusts are quick and brutal; I'm glad she is so wet, because otherwise I'd be doing major damage right now. She feels so tiny and wonderful under me, I'm afraid of hurting her. I slow to let her adjust to the invasion, but she's less concerned than I am. "Don't be gentle, Steve, perhaps next time we can take it slow," she smiles wickedly "but right now, I have a different idea."
"What do you have in mind, my girl?" I ask barely managing to contain my excitement.
Instead of answering, she pulls herself away until we separate. I want to whimper with loss. She manages to turn over by twisting the tie until she's on her knees.
"Please, like this..."
This time I cannot hold back a moan of pure need as I kneel behind her, licking all the way up her spine. She has a beautifully muscled back, tiny waist, and a museum-quality ass. She sways her posterior, taunting me. I've fallen completely, hopelessly in love with her and there's nothing I can do to stop it. The first thrust is so good I almost lose it. I reach around and stroke her clit in counterpoint to the hard pounding of my cock. I'm not going to last much longer at this rate. She thrashes wildly, reminding me of a jungle cat in heat. My little tigress. We are definitely fucking like animals now. I'm marking what's mine in the most primal way, covering her completely with my body, my scent. Kissing the back of her neck, I growl possessively, "Mine" as I grind her clit harder under my fingers.
"Yes Steve, I'm yours." She gasps in response and I feel her tighten around me: she's coming and coming hard. I hear her unintelligible scream and it is my victory - Yes! I'm only a second behind her and as I feel the eruptions, I bite her shoulder to keep from screaming as well. God, it's never been quite this good. Never. My cock feels like it's pumping out every drop of fluid in my body. When the last tremor passes, I collapse on top of her.
All I can do is lie there bonelessly till I catch my breath. She giggles beneath me. "Cap, um... I can't breathe." Oops. I manage to roll off of her and release her hands from their bonds, I take each wrist and cover the red marks with kisses, massaging lightly.
"Not too bad, old man."
I growl in warning, then look at the clock. "Twelve thirty!? I don't think I've spent this much time it bed since I was a teenager. I kiss her firmly. "This is all your fault, you vixen." I get out of bed and look down at the sodden pile at my feet "Let me throw these in the dryer for a few minutes. I don't think anything of mine will fit you." Heading to the laundry room, I manage not to skip, barely… it's not good form for a superhero to skip, even if he is in love.
Natasha
I hear Steve return and I turn away, wrapping the blue sheet around me "Get out, beast! I need clothes!"
"So I see." Clint's voice is very low, and more dangerous than I've ever heard.
I freeze, hoping that what I hear is nothing more than an auditory hallucination - it's possible after all, these things happen right? Wrong. I turn around to see Clint staring at me with a mixture of jealousy, anger, lust and hurt that kills me. What do you do when your partner abandons you then finds you in the bed of his super hero team leader? I'll bet not even Miss Manners would know how to deal with a situation like this.
"What are you doing here Clint?"
He ignores the question. "Please Natasha. Tell me this isn't what it looks like. Lie to me." His voice is tight with barely controlled anger. I scoot back as Clint comes closer, but he keeps advancing until I am pressed against the headboard. "Tell me you didn't stay here last night! Tell me you love me and you didn't sleep with him! Tell me you didn't fuck him again right here in this bed!" He looks at the bite mark on my shoulder. "Tell me that's not from his teeth on your skin." He's yelling now, almost crying, begging me to tell him what he wants to hear. "Goddamit Nat, fucking LIE TO ME. Please."
I've never lied to Clint Barton, and I can't start now. "I love you, Clint. That's not a lie."
With a howl of frustration he launches a punch at one of the massive oak bedposts and the structure shudders with the impact. I scramble off the other side of the bed, pulling the sheet with me.
"Clint! Stop it!"
He stalks towards me and I quickly run out of room to back up. I hold up my hand to keep him at a distance but he ignores my protests. He grabs the front of my sheet and jerks me up to him, my toes are dangling inches from ground. I don't know if he wants to hit me or kiss me.
"Why, Natasha? How could you do this to me?"
My pulse thuds in my ears. I'm afraid of him. I've never been afraid of Clint before. "You left me, remember?"
This seems to diffuse some of his anger, he sets me back on the floor. Sitting on the bed, Clint rests his head in his hands. He looks miserable. I can't stand to see that, knowing it's all my doing. I adjust the sheet so that it will stay up on its own and kneel in front of him. Taking his head in my hands, I force him to look at me. A single line of tears runs down each cheek and it breaks my heart to see them.
"I love you, Natasha. Doesn't that mean anything to you?"
I feel wetness on my cheeks and realize that I'm crying as well. "I never meant for it to happen Clint. I didn't mean to fall in love with both of you..."
His eyes widen in shock and denial. "No. You can't mean that."
I nod, not trusting my voice.
"You can't love him Natasha, he's... he's..." Clint can't seem to come up with a term bad enough.
"He's your friend and team mate, or was till last week, so don't say anything you don't mean."
"Natasha, I understand attraction, even lust. But not like what we have… Not love."
"Clint - ."
"He stole you from me!"
"Excuse me?!"
He has the good grace to blush but continues. "If it weren't for him, you'd be with me now."
"If it weren't for him, I'd have kept killing people I blamed for your death until SHIELD had to put me down like a dog!" I'm practically screaming now.
Clint's breath catches, this obviously never occurred to him. He shocks me by gathering me into his arms. "Oh God, Natasha. I didn't know... I never meant to die on you..."
I'm crying now, too. He strokes my hair and holds me close. Very close. Close enough that it reminds me of our earlier times together, especially that one night in Istanbul after his return from the dead, when it was simple and sweet between us.
One of Clint's hands drifts from my head down my waist, pulling me even flush against him. My body reacts involuntarily, pulse racing, heat staining my cheeks. This is wrong and dangerous, and I need him to stop before he realizes what he's doing to me.
Being in his arms, wrapped only in a layer of thin blue cotton, both of us too emotionally raw to think logically... This could get very bad, very quickly. I disentangle myself from his embrace and move back, but not before he senses what's happening.
"Don't run from me, Natasha."
"I can't do this."
"It's still there between us Natasha, you want me, I know you do," Clint's voice hardens slightly. "Even after being in his bed."
I take a deep breath. I can handle this. "That doesn't mean I'm going to act on it."
"Suddenly loyal now? How convenient."
Oh, good. I like it better when he's being mean. It lets me go from feeling guilty to pissed. "Go to hell Clint."
"You chose him Nat, I'm already there."
Damn, I'm back to guilt. He closes the distance between us and I put up my hands to keep him at a safe distance - who am I kidding, as if oceans would be enough to keep our feelings in check - he presses my hands against his chest.
"Clint, don't do this."
"I've tried to stop loving you, but I can't." He raises my hands to his lips and kisses the palms. It takes a physical effort to suppress a shiver of desire. "I'll never be able to stop Natasha."
I make an effort to keep my voice cold and steady. "Try harder, Barton."
Suddenly I hear Steve's voice behind me. "Pardon the interruption, Natasha. Is there a problem here?"
"It's okay, Cap. Clint was just leaving."
"I'm not going anywhere."
"Clint, please."
I don't know if Clint even hears me, he's is staring past me at Steve. I can't see Steve's expression behind my back, but I get the feeling that it's not helping the situation.
"The lady has asked you to leave, Clint."
"I'm not leaving you here with her."
"This is MY home Clint, MY bedroom, which you seem to be very well aware of. Did you watch us all night… this morning… or just catch the floor show in the den."
With a shout of rage, Clint charges at Steve, I move to block his path, taking his arm and trying to pull him back. I realize two seconds later, I've made a mistake, I've assumed Clint wouldn't hurt me, I was wrong. In his haste to get to Steve, he pushes me violently away and I'm thrown across the room. My training is the only thing that saves me from a broken neck, and I roll to a standing position… The sheet didn't make it so I'm completely nude, but too pissed off to care.
"All right you two, knock it the fuck off." I point a finger at Clint "You, you nearly broke my neck." He begins to speak but I cut him off rounding on Steve. "And you, you goaded him into it. I'm going to-"
A sudden sound on Steve's side table interrupts me. At the same time Clint's phone goes off, it's Nick Fury. "Avengers, assemble. We have half a dozen ugly red guys tearing up the Bronx, get down there immediately."
TBC
Everything that sucks about this chapter is my fault - everything that does not is the fault of my uber betas DJ Liopleurodon & Ink & Ash - you guys rock. Reviews keep me writing, flames warm my feet during the cold months :)
