Warnings: not (too) safe for work, plus the usual swearing

Disclaimer: it's chapter 3 and KnB with its characters still belongs to Fujimaki-sensei

-xoxoxo-

Kagami didn't remember how they exactly they ended up on a double date. He vaguely remembered Kuroko just going and asking point blank if he was a homo. And the following absurd discussion on whether it should be 'homo', 'homosexual', or 'gay'. He distinctly remembered struggling to explain how Kise had said it would be just for practice and the little betraying shit going, "I said no such thing. I believe my exact words were: "we should try dating, the two of us". After that the sequence of events stopped making sense. Somewhere along the way Kuroko suggested they make it a double date and the universe seemed to agree it was a brilliant fucking idea.

So to recap: one of these days he was having a burger, then he was having a date with Kise, and now he was - no shit! - on a real life double date with two miracles and a shadow. On a Farris. Fucking. Wheel.

What's next? An orgy with the whole former Teiko team? Kagami might as well let them take turns.

"Well, that was fun!" Kise stretched like a cat, jumping out of the small glass cabin and back onto the firm ground." Kagamicchi, you don't look too good. You okay?"

Kagami slowly lifted his eyes at him. "Peachy."

The foul mood, the vexation that had followed him for the last couple of days was back with now doubled force. Kagami could feel it boil inside of him like a rotting stew. He was somewhat surprised to discover, that fact also meant that the feeling had been temporarily driven out in the first place, but was in no mood for celebration. All of his remaining energy was being used on trying not to bite the people who, he had to keep reminding himself of that, were actually friends.

Watching Kuroko hold hands and brush up casually against Aomine was hard enough as it was, but to have Kise hang off of his own arm, looking all competitive...

To make it home without exploding and doing something he would regret. That the goal of the evening. Evening? Had he really been keeping this up for the whole day? Kagami felt exhausted. Mentally. Physically. Exhausted. He was going home. He was getting into the shower and then he was getting into bed. No alarms. He's sleeping this dating thing off for the next day. Or better yet, for a year.

"If we hurry up, we can still catch a movie. Kurokocchi, what was that thing you wanted to see?"

No.

Just, no.

No way in hell! Kagami thought and suddenly realized he was saying it out loud. Next to him Kise trailed off abruptly, surprised. Was he yelling or whispering? Did it matter?

"No," Kagami repeated as calmly as he was capable of. "Enough! For fuck's sake, haven't you had enough? You've had your fun. I get it! The joke's on me."

"Kagami-kun? But dating is supposed to be fun..."

"It's not a fucking date!" Yelling. Definitely.

"You!" He stuck his finger in Kise's alarmed pretty face. "You said it was just for practice. It was supposed to help me,.. help... That doesn't even make any sense! Anyway, it's not a date, alright? I'm not a fucking homo! This is just make-belief. Got it?"

Before Kagami could make sure if they did or not, Kuroko walked over to him and calmly kicked him in the shin.

Whatever other words he was going to say got stuck on the way out. Kagami bended in half, wheezing, struggling to catch his breath. His head was a fuzzy, mushy mess.

"Wow, the guy really lost it." Aomine was watching him like he was a curious breed of Chihuahua.

Kise was quiet.

From where he was, Kagami could see his lower half turning away and walking off. "I got it. Excuse me a minute." It sounded upset.

"Nice work," Kuroko offered his input.

"You bastard, you actually kicked me!"

"I should have kicked you harder. After you went and yelled at Kise-kun."

"You don't get it! I just told the truth. That guy was..."

"No. You don't get it. Go and apologize!"

Kagami stubbornly squared his shoulders.

"No way in hell!" Why did he have to?

A few minutes later he was in the nearby men's restroom to retrieve a certain runaway blond - his jaw now sporting an impressive bruise. Kuroko didn't look like much, but damn, that guy knew how to hit! (Kagami always managed to forget that, lulled into a false sense of security by his small size.)

Kise was easily spotted staring at the running water with his back to Kagami.

Okay, he might've gone a bit too far earlier, judging by the blond's slumped shoulders.

"Hey..." Kagami started, but trailed off. He was so not good at apologizing. Actually, there wasn't much besides basketball that he was good at.

"Hey,..uhm, sorry about earlier. The whole thing kinda... got away from me. My bad."

Still no reaction. Except, perhaps, Kise's shoulders now started to tremble a bit.

Kagami narrowed his eyes with a sudden realization.

"Oh hell, you're not crying, are you?"

That did the trick.

"Fuck you!" Kise spun around, grabbing Kagami by the collar. There was no tears in his eyes. Just plenty of fury. "You're a fucking dumbass! An idiot with a potato for a brain! After all this you still haven't got a fucking clue, have you?"

"You people keep saying that. I don't get..."

Okay.

Never mind.

He got it this time. All by himself too.

That is to say, Kise's tongue down his throat was pretty much self-explanatory.

...It felt like Kagami was on that Ferris Wheel again. Only this time it was spinning three hundred times faster an in every possible direction.

At some point he was skillfully maneuvered, so that they were sandwiched with Kise's back to the wall. The other boy was grabbing at him, bringing them closer, deeper. Before letting go just as forcefully.

"How's that for make-belief?" he hissed into Kagami's now swollen mouth.

Oh, Kise.

"Believable." Kagami said hoarsely.

Because what else could he say?

Kise's eyes were gleaming and unfocused. Framed by curled up, long eyelashes. They were slowly drawing closer and closer until Kagami couldn't take it anymore, closing the rest of the distance himself.

Kise leaned into him with his whole body, his hands now tugging at Kagami's hair instead of his coat. An open-mouth kiss was caressing Kagami's tongue and lips. But not demanding control - offering it.

'I never wanted you docile, Kagamicchi.'

Yeah, now he got that too.

Kagami pulled Kise sharply away from the hard surface and into his arms. This was all child's play. And they were pubescent teenagers according to some expert opinion. They needed more. Like Kise's lean body lined up against his with not a millimeter between them to spare. Like his own hands sliding over the blond's body - hugging, caressing, fondling.

Kagami bit down on Kise's lip and jerked their hips together, following a growing urge he didn't fully comprehend.

Indecent? Forbidden? With another boy?

Who cared about any of this when they could feel each other like this?

Rubbing against each other through the rough material of their pants. Feeling the other respond to the maddening touch.

"Kagamicchi... Kagamicchi!"

"Shut up!" Kagami covered the begging mouth with his own. Fuck! If Kise were to keep moaning with that voice, Kagami would embarrass himself in three seconds.

It was as if someone had ripped off the lid on Kagami's sanity and emptied out the contents.

The sound of Kise's broken voice vibrated on Kagami's lips. More. There was so much more left to kiss. To taste. Kise's neck, his jaw line, his burning cheekbones...

When he caught a person's figure standing next to them with his peripheral vision, Kagami almost had a heart attack.

Kise caught on an instant later, both of them freezing simultaneously, both of them with ragged breaths and hearts hammering in their throats.

"Let me guess. It's not what I think? You weren't doing anything?" Kuroko didn't even try to avert his eyes.

It was Kagami who couldn't look at him instead. "How long..." he coughed out.

"...Have I been here? Let's just say, long enough. This is a public restroom, you know."

It was?

Gods! How long have they been here?

Kagami was struggling to gather what was still left of his scattered wits, but Kise collected himself faster. Sliding out of their embrace like he was made of liquid, the blond fixed his jacket and grabbed Kuroko's arm.

"Let me show you where the door is, Kurokocchi," he offered his services, dragging him away.

Left to his own devices Kagami slumped against the wall and slowly let the gravity and steadily mounting exhaustion pull him down to the floor. His body was still vibrating from the recent strenuous activities. The awoken and not entirely spent desire was still there, circling through him, but not burning him from the inside anymore, just teasing. Kagami looked down at his hands - they were shaking.

Just what in holly fuck's name had they been doing?!..

He didn't know how long he sat there for.

-xoxoxo-

They didn't get a chance to properly say anything to each other after that. Something, Kagami realized, wasn't fair or right, but was incredibly grateful for it anyway. His mind frantically groped for anything 'proper' and came back empty-handed. Screw proper, he didn't know words anymore. They did manage a few goodbyes in front of the now infamous train station. But the awkwardness was sipping through every 'so, I'll call you', and 'yeah, see you later... thanks!.. I mean, yeah'.

Kuroko finally put them out of their misery by taking official charge of getting 'Kagami-kun' safely home.

Yeah, right! Like there was something else left that he hadn't been subjected to already.

Kagami didn't protest.

They walked quietly for some time, with Kuroko paying just about as much attention to him as he would if Kagami was, say, a horse fly.

Kagami on the other hand felt an inexplicable, dreadful, but steadily growing urge to explain himself, and of course zero clue of how to go about it.

"Kuroko, listen, uhm.. back in the bathroom," he started not so subtly. If you don't know how to go about it, say it point blank. "..Hell, I don't know!" Yeah, that will clear things up. Way to go!

Kuroko awarded him a sideways glance.

"You are not very smart, are you Kagami-kun?"

"The hell?" Kagami started, but then promptly stopped himself. Aw, who the hell is he kidding!

Kuroko just waved his hand, cutting off the outrage with a sigh.

For a moment Kagami thought that was it. But then the other boy suddenly stopped in the middle of the street and simply said: "It wasn't Aomine-kun, who confessed to me, you know. I asked him out."

"Huh?" That wasn't at all what Kagami was expecting to hear. In so many ways.

"He would've done it himself of course, eventually, he just wasn't primed for it yet." Kuroko continued, ignoring Kagami's confusion. "So I did it myself... I did it, because Kise-kun asked me to."

Kise asked him? To what,.. confess?

"Why?.."

Kuroko lifted his face and looked Kagami in the eyes. He had his slightly mischievous look on. (Which, unless you knew him like Kagami did, looked like every other poker face devoid of emotion.)

"Hmm... I should think, to set a good example. Since you weren't getting any other of his signs."

Oh.

...

Oooh!

"Shut up!" Kuroko intersected just as Kagami opened his mouth. "You are not going to say anything smart anyway. So just let it sink in for a little while."

"Wait! Does that..."

"What did I just say?"

"But!.. Does it.."

"Yes, Bakagami. It does. Now shush."

"Pushy brat!"

Both of them.

They walked the rest of the way in silence on demand. Side by side. Kuroko lifted up his face, offering it to the evening breeze. Kagami's mind was blank. His head heavy and feeling overstuffed, like it couldn't fit another thought.

The phone in his back pocket vibrated against his butt just as they turned the last corner. And to think he was so close to making it home! Undisturbed.

Kagami popped the screen open and stared blankly at the enormous amount of emoji that made it a challenge to find the actual message. The text itself, once found, read short: "Let's go to the movies next time." For some reason it made Kagami want to throw his phone against a brick fence. Instead he settled for punching in: "Fuck your movies!" and got a string of blushing faces in return.

That was unusual.

Kagami re-read his own message and paled. Instead of an intended snappy come back, what stared back at him was, "Fuck you in movies".

Autocorrect.

Oh. Dear. God!

"Are you okay?" Kuroko tried to peer over his elbow.

Kagami pondered that for a moment. There was a small bit of inability to process just what the hell had been done to him, a considerable bit of embarrassment and a huge chunk of confusion. SO they were what,.. a couple now? And what about that bit with Kise going around arranging confessions and setting up dates?

"Exhausted." He offered the final verdict.

Who the hell said that dating was easy? That it's all unicorn rainbows and sheer fucking joy?! For Kagami it seemed more like teaching rocket science while riding a tricycle. On a rope. That hangs a hundred meters up in the air. Above a pit filled with needles and Lego pieces.

Kagami decisively shoved his phone back.

He's not sharing those emotion-socked observations with anyone.

"It will get easier." Kuroko gives him a small but very knowing smile.

Kagami couldn't even begin to explain to him all of the reasons why that couldn't be true.

-fin-

A/N: That's all I've got. Having blissfully forgotten I was supposed to do something for Secret Santa, I had to write this on a very short notice, so I kind of freaked. Maybe that's why my style suddenly reversed itself to past tense writing. So this is a bit out of character for me, but I did my best. Comments, positive or otherwise, are treasured and much appreciated.