Chapter 3: No patience

-f-c-a-

"What's with this candy?" asked Frisk absently, as he ate another one.

He was still resting in the chamber before the ghost, inwardly hoping it would leave and clear the way before he had to move on. There was nothing around but a table with a gross piece of dusty cheese on it and a mousehole.

Chara was feeling extra sarcastic, since she had realized she was sharing all of Frisk's senses, including taste. The signal was a bit muted, but she was still somewhat disgusted with his hygiene nonchalance.

'Did the taste floor you? These sweets are dirt cheap after all,' she quipped, prompting an amused eye-roll.

"I was talking about how they seem to dissolve as soon as I gulp them. Or the fact that I'm feeling healthier than a minute ago," he clarified.

He felt her giving him a mental nod. 'That's right. I keep forgetting you're new. Monsters can't exactly grow normal crops down here. All food is magical in origin. It has all the nutrients of normal food and it never spoils, but it won't reach your stomach and won't really fill you up.'

"Weird," stated the boy, eating a third piece of candy. With a sigh, he decided he couldn't stall any longer. "Time to do this. Do you know anything about it?" he asked as they slowly approached.

Chara considered that. 'It looks like a member of the Blook family.' She paused and blinked. 'Napstablook? Not sure how I know that…You can't really hurt or kill ghosts, so no EXP here,' she added a bit disappointedly.

Frisk scoffed. "We need to have a long talk about your obsession with killing."

He could feel her mental sigh. 'I simply don't want to see you die too soon. Hitching a ride on you is the best thing that's happened to me since my death.'

He mirrored her mood as he slowly approached the ghost. "You are so negative about everything," he complained.

She raised a mental brow. 'So that's why we're stuck together! Sheer magnetic force. I should...' She paused as they stood before the ghost and Frisk could feel her incredulity. 'The dumb thing isn't even sleeping! It's just saying 'z' loudly!'

As if on cue, the annoying sound intensified. "... mr. ghost?" tried the boy, not wanting to get any closer.

'Just push the damn thing!'

"Umm... that wouldn't be very effective..."

Frisk's eyes went wide as the spectre in question cracked an eye open and stopped pretending to be asleep. "You heard her?" he exclaimed, his reservations apparently forgotten.

Napstablook blinked, then rose from the ground. "I heard something... Is your invisible friend playing a prank on me?" it asked, sniffling a bit.

The boy took a step back and raised his hands in a placating manner, as his soul appeared. "Not quite a prank to be frank," he joked weakly.

The ghost blinked in incomprehension and Chara sighed. 'It doesn't seem to have a sense of humor, Frisk…'

Napstablook's eyes went wide. "That's not true! I'm really funny," it declared, as actual tears started leaking from its eyes. Unlike normal tears, however, they did not comply with gravity, scattering at random angles. A couple fell on Frisk and he hissed in pain.

'What a crybaby…' muttered Chara, trying to think quietly. It seemed to work, as the ghost did not react and instead continued sobbing. 'Try to dodge them! Ectoplasm really stings.'

Frisk attempted to salvage the situation. "Hey, Napstablook, a pretty ghost like you shouldn't be crying. How about we… go eat ice-cream together, or something?" he asked hesitantly, cursing himself for not having asked more details about ghosts and dating spots.

'I refuse to encourage you with that sort of information,' his guide declared resolutely, while he avoided more tears.

The ghost blinked at Frisk's clumsy flirting, then shook its head sadly, though its tear-sprinkling reduced in volume. "I…I'd just weigh you down," it lamented.

The boy grabbed at the golden chance, smiling indulgently. "That was a smart one! I know ghosts weigh nothing."

Napstablook eyed him curiously. "You thought that was smart?"

Frisk nodded. "Sure! You seem a bit depressing at first, but I can see right through you! You just need some help to lift your spirits."

The ghost actually chuckled, its tears becoming a mere trickle. "People have told me that before, but never a stranger."

He felt he was on a roll now. "Well, that's weird. I bet you are very talented."

It seemed a bit uncomfortable, even as it smiled. "I sometimes make music, but… ah, yes. Let me try…" Its tears increased, but this time they flew upwards, their magic bringing them together and forming a classy hat on top of its head. "I call it 'dapper blook'," it half-bragged, half-fretted.

Frisk only had to feign some of his surprise. "It's pretty neat!" he decided.

Napstablook seemed to actually blush, though Frisk couldn't begin to imagine how that worked. "Oh, gee, really? I usually come here to be alone, but you…you are nice! I…I'm sorry, I'm rambling and I'm still in the way. Sorry…" Before Frisk could even respond, the ghost fled through a wall, leaving him alone with his passenger.

'What a loser,' groused Chara, sounding annoyed. 'It should be apologizing for drawing us in combat instead. Are you alright?" she asked, a bit more concerned.

Frisk sighed, popping another candy in his mouth. "I'll be fine. And I actually thought Napstablook was okay. It was just going through a phase."

'Phase my ass! The whole place stinks of ectoplasm now. Let's get…. Hey watch your step!'

The warning came too late, as the floor below Frisk collapsed and he fell inside a pit.

-f-c-a-

Toriel was beside herself with worry. She had finished her shopping in record time and had been doing her best to return to her guest as fast as possible, when a small white dog ambushed her, successively stealing a bag of flour, her house keys and her cellphone as she tried to catch it. She would have rushed to Frisk anyway, pies and doors be damned, but after realizing how much time she had already wasted, she was sure Frisk wouldn't be waiting her in the long corridor anyway. She'd need her phone to locate him.

"Little puppy!" she shouted, trying to hide her despair. "Where are you? I shall give you a treat if you return my phone!"

She continued searching every nook and cranny urgently, trying and failing not to think of what could happen to a human lost in the ruins of Home. Toriel generally liked dogs, but she decided that if Frisk got hurt because of this incident, she'd burn the damn thing to a crisp.

-f-c-a-

Frisk woke up to the weird sensation of having his eyes open. Blinking dumbly, he clenched his hand, grabbing a handful of dead leaves.

'About time you woke up, sleepyhead!' said Chara, sounding annoyed. 'You didn't knock your head that hard.'

Frisk sat up, bouncing a bit on the huge pile of brown leaves he had landed on. "You woke up before me?" he asked, looking around. Fortunately, they were alone. He didn't even want to think what would have happened if a monster had caught him sleeping.

He felt Chara's annoyance increasing. 'You bet. I tried to wake you up, then to steer your body, but it felt like I was trapped in a meat prison,' she explained angrily. 'The most I could do was open your eyes, and the effort almost knocked me out a second time.'

Frisk smirked. "I guess your demonic scheme to 'consume my soul and take over my body' will have to wait, then," he teased.

Interestingly, he could almost feel her blush on his own two cheeks. 'Shut up!' she demanded, soon regaining her composure. 'If I recall correctly, there is a ladder around that corner that can return us upstairs. Hey what are you..?'

The boy had stopped listening, having found something interesting buried inside the leaves. It was a long red ribbon, made of fine, sturdy cloth. Its colour had faded quite a bit, to a dull rose red, but Frisk could tell it used to be really vibrant in the past. "It feels weird," he muttered, fingering it carefully. For some reason, touching it sent goose bumps all over his body.

Chara, who was also feeling the effect, tried to make light of it. 'Maybe you should wear it. If you're cuter, monsters won't hit you as hard.'

Frisk froze at that, eyes wide, and he gulped. "I… see," he whispered, a bit sadly.

'What do you mean, you see? Wait, are you actually putting it on…? Where did you even learn how to tie a bow?'

Frisk finished tying his hair in a short ponytail, expertly forming a perfect bow at the end, and sighed in relief. He hadn't realized how irritating his hair had been. "When you work in theater, you learn all sorts of things. How do I look?"

Chara did a mental scowl. 'Girly? Ridiculous? How should I know? I can only see what you can.'

"Right," he replied lightheartedly. "We'll just have to ask Toriel. Which way?"

'As I was saying, go up the ladder and this time watch your step. There are a couple puzzles ahead and I'll only help you if you beg and grovel.'

Frisk smiled and Chara was already groaning before the words formed. "You like your boys on their knees, miss kink, huh? Fine by me."

-f-c-a-

Frisk dodged an artichoke that passed by his head like a bullet, then leaped over a boiled zucchini as it bounced on the floor.

"Ok, why are we being bombarded by vegetables?"

His attempt to talk to his current opponent, a sentient, oversized monster carrot, had only produced a cackle and a jeer about how plants can't talk. He would have laughed if he wasn't fighting for his life.

'Vegetoids are pushy little shits,' replied Chara casually. 'They are here for your health.'

Frisk rolled his eyes as an eggplant whizzed by. "Very helpful, oh wise guide!"

"Eat your greens!" shrieked the plant monster as it flung more local produce at him.

"Do I actually have to eat the vegetables that detach from that monster's body as we speak?"

Chara sounded entirely too merry. 'You have the green light from me. I won't be green with envy, even though I can't eat myself. If you weren't a greenhorn, you'd find it natural. Are you feeling green around the gills yet?'

Frisk was already stuffing his face, if only to make his mind passenger shut up.

-f-c-a-

The weird pollen was easily dodged, but Frisk resumed staring at the monster before him in contemplation.

'Frisk, you can just leave. The Moldsmal isn't going anywhere.'

The boy laughed a bit. "This wiggling is a bit mesmerizing," he confessed.

Chara sighed. 'Ah, yes. So stereotypical. Curvaceously attractive, but no brains... It's a damn slime!'

Frisk faced the monster and smiled determined, then wiggled his hips seductively. The Moldsmal responded by moving in sync.

'How meaningful! Of course you'd try to flirt with the slime. Why on earth did I think otherwise?' moaned the dead girl, shaking a head she didn't have.

"Fear not, dear," he declared. "I prefer your straightforward thinking to its sexy curves."

-f-c-a-

Frisk dove to the floor as a swarm of cockroach-like monsters about half his height zoomed above him, mandibles ready to mangle. "Why are these things so aggressive?" he whined. "At this rate, I'll have to fight back." The human boy didn't really want to kill any more monsters, but he knew he wouldn't hesitate if it came down to mortal combat.

The swarm released a rain of magic projectiles and he rolled away. A couple of them did hit him, however, and he winced. Chara also felt the pain, however reduced, and sighed. 'Migosp are some of the gentlest monsters when on their own, but they are also both psychic and really submissive. You should be aiming for that bitch over there.'

She didn't have actual fingers to point with, but Frisk soon spotted the solitary eyeball monster that seemed content to watch as the Migosp swarm attacked. "Is he… controlling them?"

Chara raised a mental brow. 'First off, that Loox is female. And yes, they are feeding off her aggression. Proximity pretty much forces them to include her in the hive mind and her intent is much stronger than theirs.'

Frisk had ended up closer to the Loox and she seemed to notice the fact, attacking with her eyebeams, her single eye fixed on him. "Come on, guys!" She shouted. "If we capture the human, we'll get a fortune! We will be the best!"

"How to calm her down…" muttered the human boy, not quite asking for help.

His guide responded anyway. 'Loox can normally be reasoned with, but this one's power-tripping. Just kick her ass,' she said viciously.

Frisk frowned as he once again dodged. His acrobatics were slowly turning physics-defying, aided by his own latent magic and causing his exposed soul to glow brightly. "I said, no killing if possible!"

Chara sighed. 'You are a wimpy spoilsport… Look, you don't have to dust her. Just rough her up a bit and she'll flee. If you are conscious of your actions and truly intend not to kill her, you won't, at least not in one strike like that Froggit.' He blinked at that, feeling a bit apprehensive. Chara had not always been truthful, after all. She sensed his doubts and he could feel she was a bit hurt, but then she put forth a mental smirk. 'Believe me or not, that's your call. I can't force you to trust me.'

Cursing up a storm, Frisk suddenly dashed towards the Loox, taking an eyebeam head-on and body-checking her in return, causing them both to slide on the rough floor with him on the top. Despite being roughly the same size, he easily overpowered her arms and wacked her with his stick across her one big eye. She cried in pain, then whimpered. "I was wrong! Please don't kill me!"

"Call them off and get out!" he ordered cruelly as he got off her, and she scrambled out of the room, leaving a trail of tears.

The Migosp seemed to freeze when she got away, then completely abandoned their attack. Some started chattering and dancing, but one of them meekly approached Frisk, trembling a bit. "We are very sorry, human. She really wanted to catch you and we couldn't…"

The human boy smiled. "It's okay. Just try not to do it again."

The bug monster nodded vigorously, then offered him a small package. "It's a couple sandwiches. The least we can do as an apology."

Frisk accepted the gift and patted the little monster on the head, causing it to blush. He then waved them goodbye, his smile widening as all the bugs turned as one and waved back.

'You are way too forgiving,' complained Chara, as he started munching on a sandwich. It was pretty good, even though the cheese tasted a bit funny.

Frisk shrugged. "As you said, they couldn't help it. And anyway, I also got some money off them." To demonstrate, he materialized a handful of gold coins in his hand, tossing them in the air, then grabbing them and sending them back to his inventory.

Chara seemed flabbergasted. 'What? When did you even…?'

"I have my ways," he replied, smirking cockily. After a while, though, his smile died down and his face turned solemn. "Sorry I hesitated. I thought you were trying to trick me back there…"

She giggled in his head. "You listened to me in the end and that's what matters. After all, humans are generally lying, wretched creatures, so I should be flattered."

Frisk did not respond to that, but decided the two of them also needed to have a long talk about their clashing worldviews. For now, though, there were more enemies to face and more puzzles to solve.

-f-c-a-

Toriel had only spent a moment in her house, just enough to drop off her shopping, and was ready to enter a sprint, her clawed hand already dialing Chara's number.

It had taken her some time to locate the mischievous white dog and recover everything, but she was determined to make no more mistakes. Refraining from preparing one of famous pies, or even tidying up a bit, she was very unprepared to hear the familiar ringtone from just behind the giant, leafless tree dominating her front yard.

Chara and Frisk had been busy arguing about whether the donut Frisk had bought from the nearby spider bake sale was actually edible, when the phone rang, startling both. The following gasp from Toriel compounded the awkwardness of the situation.

"How did you get here, my child?" asked the boss monster, her eyes scanning every inch of the human boy more thoroughly than security lasers. "You are not hurt," she decided at length, though Frisk's slightly more torn clothes did make her pause. "Impressive! But still…I should not have left you alone for so long," she decided regretfully. "Preparing a surprise certainly does not excuse the risks," she muttered mostly to herself. "Come small one!"

Frisk had not tried to get a word in edgewise, smiling at the motherly monster and following her inside the cozy house that seemed to be carved from the cavern rocks themselves.

-f-c-a-

He opened his eyes lazily and even the unfamiliar surroundings, bathed in very soft ambient light, failed to faze him. He slowly recalled his trek through the ruins, the fights and Chara's guidance. Frisk tried to talk to her, but no response came. The sad thought she had left was quickly replaced by relief when he remembered her admission that she was stuck with him.

"She's probably asleep," he muttered, stretching a bit.

He had been so tired before, that he had almost nodded off on his feet during the house tour Toriel had offered. The kind boss monster had noticed at once and had swiftly guided him to a bedroom; his bedroom apparently. He hadn't even bothered to undress or even take off his trusty boots, sleeping on the bed with his feet on the floor to avoid staining the sheets.

He decided to remove them on the spot, groaning in relief at the liberating feeling, then making a face as the smell registered. Simply put, he was a stinking mess, even by street urchin standards. His clothes were smelly and torn, full of holes and blood stains, his hair was sticky and the less said about his socks, the better.

He contemplated trying one of Jocelyne's self-cleaning spells, but he'd never been too good with simply, everyday magic. "I need a real shower," he concluded. His eyes wandered around the room, noticing a pile of neatly folded clean clothes that seemed to be his size, along with a large, strawberry-scented bath towel.

Five seconds later, he was already stark naked and running towards the door opposite his room, the house's only bathroom. Toriel had made it a point to show it to him, babbling something about how humans needed bathrooms for more reasons than monsters did and how monster architects had kept building them fully equipped out of tradition.

Frisk would have been content even with cold water and no soap, but instead he found himself indulging in the luxury that was scalding hot water and a variety of fruity shampoos. He lost himself in the sensations, which was why he didn't notice when Chara woke up.

The ghost girl regained consciousness very slowly, almost purring with pleasure. She hadn't had a shower in centuries after all. When true clarity came, though, and she remembered her circumstances, she mentally shrieked in embarrassment, causing Frisk to wince and almost stumble.

'FRISK!'

The boy rolled his eyes. "Good morning to you too, princess," he joked. "It is suds a joy hearing you voice again."

'Why are you naked?' she demanded.

Frisk giggled. "No need to work yourself up into a lather. I couldn't bare not having a shower."

'This is hardly the time for puns!' she riposted, very agitated. 'And don't look down!' she added desperately.

The boy blatantly ignored her. Hot showers had been really rare in his life and he wanted to make sure that, for once, every inch of his body was squeaky clean. "You are such a prude," he concluded. "I thought that only showerheads get turned on when I shower," he added wiggling his eyebrows.

Chara released a final wail of indignation, then retreated as deeply into Frisk's consciousness as she could muster.

-f-c-a-

Only when Frisk was fully dressed again, clean stripped sweater and fluffy slippers included, did Chara's presence return to his mind, though the girl remained a stubbornly silent observer. The boy had returned to his room and was sitting on his bed, devouring a piece of butterscotch-cinnamon pie Toriel had left for him. When done, he finally released a sigh.

He was clean, fed and safe, even if the future seemed uncertain. The contentment of the moment…

it filled him with Determination.

The boy blinked at the alien feeling. Even though most of his innate magic was a mystery to him, he knew how it felt. What had just flooded his senses for a second was something new, something potent that both scared and exhilarated him at the same time, without knowing why.

"What was that?" he asked aloud, his eyes wide.

Chara seemed to consider something, then dismiss it. 'It was probably nothing important,' she muttered, her resolve to give him the silent treatment forgotten. 'Perhaps your reaction to all that monster food?'

Frisk decided not to worry about it. "I want to explore," he said, taking out his cellphone and checking the time.

4:00 am.

The girl frowned. 'Mom is probably asleep…'

The boy smirked. "Exactly! And I know just where to go!" Leaving his room and making sure to stay quiet, he reached the front hall and started descending a set of downward stairs. "Mom was extra careful not to mention this place," he explained.

Chara mentally rolled her eyes. 'It leads outside, to the rest of the underworld. Mystery solved! Now go to the kitchen and look for some chocolate.' Her hopes were dashed when she felt Frisk's curiosity intensifying. 'Fine, do what you want. I'll be inside you, judging.'

The stairs led to a long corridor, which intersected vertically with what looked like a large tunnel. There were multiple wheel marks and footprints all over.

'That's the passage connecting the Home region to the main cavern. Can we go back now?'

Frisk shook his head and started following the apparently well-travelled path, wincing a bit as a draft of freezing-cold wind caressed him. Ten minutes later, he was just about to give up and return, when he saw a pair of enormous, ominous doors, full with intricate runes and humming with magic. Mesmerized, he touched them, amazed when they yielded to his slight push and opened.

The now painful cold didn't even register as he stared ahead. The ground was white with snow and glowing pinpricks of light shone above the dense forest around him. A road, starting from the ruins' door, seemed to cut right through the trees, twisting out of sight in the distance.

It took him a while, but he figured it out. "We are still underground," he marveled. "This is just a huge cavern. The snow is conjured and the 'stars' are just glowing gems on the ceiling!"

Chara sighed. 'And the first sleuthing prize goes to… some kid, who'll freeze to death soon. Just…' She gasped as Frisk took a step forward. 'Wait! The doors will…'

It was too late. The boy hadn't even managed to fully turn, when the doorway was resealed with a vicious slam, leaving the duo stranded.

Frisk touched, then banged on the doors, to no avail. "Chara, how do I open them again?"

'…You don't,' she deadpanned. 'Not without the password, which I don't know. Call mom.'

The boy gulped and shook his head. "Not happening."

Chara sighed. 'If this is about stupid pride, I swear I'll…'

He shook his head again. "Not happening, because I forgot the phone back in my room, when I checked the time."

His spirit guide did a mental facepalm. 'Just great! Mom won't be up for hours, the closest village I know of is too far away and you're in a sweater and slippers at minus ten degrees! Pneumonia, here we come!'

Frisk was already shivering, but cracked a pained smile nonetheless. "That would be the icing on the cake."

He could feel grudging respect from his mindmate. 'You're dedicated, but hypothermia snow joking matter. We need to find shelter until morning.'

The boy nodded and forced himself to take a step forward. The snow reached two times higher than his ankle. "This is going to suck," he muttered, trying to ignore the fact he couldn't feel his toes anymore. He tried to take a third step, then gasped and stopped moving.

He initially thought he was simply frozen solid on the spot, but then he noticed a dark blue aura around his body and, more importantly, his red soul, which had inexplicably appeared.

'Frisk, look out! There is…'

She didn't finish her sentence, as she cried in pain, in unison with her host. Desperate, Frisk looked down, only to see a dozen sharpened bones mercilessly digging into his thighs, keeping him pinned and painting the snow crimson. Looking back up, he only saw a single bright blue eye staring at him from the darkness.

"Sorry, human. Nothing personal."

Frisk failed to process the words as a beam of white light engulfed him, searing away flesh, evaporating bones and only leaving his soul behind, suspended in midair above his ashes. His assailant tried to grab it, but at the same time Chara's mending failed and the red heart split in two, before shattering to a million pieces.

End of chapter 3.

A/N: I think that's the kind of plot twist that will keep the readers' interest up, even if they know the game's plot. I always try to balance my stories with both humor and drama, both action and introspection. Whether I succeeded, is up to you.

By the way, go check my latest Undertale one-shot if you like Toriel.

Finally, I want to thank all reviewers, signed and unsigned, for their support. Greymane especially left me a very encouraging review, though I won't confirm or deny any theories.