3. How can I say this....
Zidane hated Kuja. Before, he could honestly say that there was no-one he truly hated. Hate was such a strong word. Sure, he disliked the nobles who walked around with their noses in the air and who expressed a heavy disregard for anybody without 'The Second' or 'Of Lindblum' after their name, but he would never go so far as to say he hated them. They were still people after all....just.
Now though, pure hatred surged through his body as he looked into those dark, mocking eyes, a cruel smile playing around the mouth of the one to whom they belonged.
"So tell me what it is already, you demon!" Zidane yelled, clenching his fists tightly, imagining that they were round Kuja's neck and were slowly administering some serious suffocation-based justice.
"I'd watch my mouth, if I were you", Kuja sneered. "Surely you haven't forgotten that I hold your friends' lives in my hands?". He looked elated, taking great pleasure in the power he held over Zidane.
Zidane growled. He understood the situation perfectly well - the only option right now was to do what Kuja asked and think of something later. Although he wasn't sure what would be different about later; he wouldn't be remotely surprised if Kuja didn't hold up his end of the bargain...
"I'm sending you to a place called Oeilvert." Kuja said abruptly, jolting Zidane out his momentary reverie.
Where? mused Zidane. He'd never even heard of a place called 'Oeilvert' before. It certainly wasn't on the Mist Continent - he knew every inch of that rugged landscape; every mountain peak, every plateau, every stream for crying out loud.
"Where's that?" he asked suspiciously.
"South of the Seaways Canyon on the Forgotten Continent" replied Kuja, clearly still amused at Zidane's frustration.
Despite being in such a dire situation, with his friends' safety on the line, Zidane's adventurous spirit stirred a little within him. The Forgotten Continent was only a rumour back on the Mist; he'd always believed it existed however, confirmed of course when he received his a map of the world from Regent Cid.
"Hang on, what was the place called again?" Zidane asked, sure he'd misheard the first time.
"Oeilvert!" Kuja said irritably. "O-E-I-L-V-E-R-T! Surely even an imbecile such as yourself could understand that the first time!"
"Wait a second....there's an 'O' at the beginning? So why are you pronouncing it 'Eye-il-vert' then? Surely then it would be pronounced 'Oh-il-vert'?" said Zidane, frowning slightly.
"Er, no, it's quite clearly Oeilvert" said Kuja, pronouncing it as he had before and, for the first time, showing a glimpse of impatience. "Anyway, who cares how you say it?! You're going there to get me the Gulug Stone if you value your friends' lives and that's all you need to know, you cretin!!"
Minutes later, Zidane clambered aboard the Hilda Garde along with Steiner, Freya and Quina. Much as he hated leaving Dagger in that damn palace, he figured it would be safer to leave her there than for her to come on a wild goose chase to a ruin with a magic barrier surrounding it. In any case, Dagger's ability to use magic had diminished significantly since Alexandria had been destroyed - the less stress for her the better. With a loud noise, the airship's engine sputtered into life, slowly powering it out into the open sky. This better be quick, Zidane thought, as Kuja's palace became smaller and smaller until it faded into the distance....
------------- Some time later.... -------------
"Look at this view!!" Zidane yelled, as he raced to the deck of the Hilda Garde 3, wild with excitement at the prospect of being able to travel the world at will.
Eiko shot him a dark look, which he failed to notice. She wasn't entirely convinced that he hadn't done anything to Dagger - why else would she have cut her beautiful long hair? Judging by the way Steiner was acting as well, she felt she wasn't alone in this opinion....
"Man, it feels so good to get away from everything!" Zidane cried happily over the roar of the engines as his hair was thrown about by the wind. "No more palace, no more Zorn and Thorn, no more Oeilvert..."
"Ah yes, Oeilvert,"said Freya, her voice drifting, almost reminiscent, as if remembering an old friend. "Seems like a long time ago now..."
"Haha, you mean Oeilvert right?" Zidane smirked as he returned to the cabin to stand beside Freya - the Burmecian had pronounced the place 'Oil-vert'.
"Yes, that's what I said, Oeilvert!" Freya replied, looking quizically at Zidane, trying to figure out what he was on about.
"Freya, it's pronounced Oeilvert! Oh-il-vert! There's an 'e' in there you know!" Zidane said, trying and failing not to laugh.
"Says who? What makes you so cocksure?!" Freya snapped back, her raised voice carrying through the cabin. Zidane looked briefly surprised at Freya's somewhat aggressive reply, but he quickly recovered, his features sliding back into an easy smile.
"I do!" he began, "and..."
"I think you're both wrong." Vivi said suddenly, making everyone jump. Zidane smiled kindly down at the little mage who was looking at his feet, clearly embarrassed at having been so forthright. "How would you say it then, Vivi?"
"Um...I j-just assumed that the 'Oe' was pronounced 'e', so I would say it like 'Eel-vert'...but that's probably wrong, I'm just being silly..." Vivi said bashfully, adjusting his hat as he so often did.
"Well I think you're right, Vivi" said Dagger, who had just come up from below deck. It took a second for everyone to recognise her.
"That's exactly how I would have pronounced it. In any case, does it really ma....yes, Adelbert Steiner? Something you'd like to say?" she said suddenly, looking sharply towards Steiner who had made a noise that sounded like a combination of a suppressed cough, a laugh and a sneeze.
"N-no, of course not! Forgive me, Prin-...um, Miss Dagger!" the knight said nervously, his armour rattling slightly.
"Speak your mind, Steiner." Dagger said, pursing her lips together in a successful attempt to show her displeasure. Zidane smirked.
"W-well Your Majesty...it's just that..um...you don't seriously agree with Master Vivi's pronunciation do you? No offence of course, Master Vivi!" he added hastily.
"Oh, none taken!" Vivi responded immediately. "I probably shouldn't have said anything anyway, Dagger's getting angry...."
"And what problem is there with that pronunciation, may I ask?!" Dagger demanded, her nostrils flaring in annoyance. "I think it makes most sense to pronounce it'Eel-vert'!"
"Y-yes of course Your Majesty, of course, but...well..."
"So how would you pronounce it then, Captain?!" Dagger persisted, almost spitting the words out of her mouth.
"W-well, surely it would be 'Ale-vert', because the 'Oe' at the start is pronounced that way sometimes in some dialects, I believe....?"
Silence reigned for a long two seconds. Then, simultaneously, every single member of the party, bar Steiner, burst into uncontrollable laughter. Even the crew could barely keep themselves together; the small task of keeping the Hilda Garde 3 in the air prevented them from doing so.
Zidane was, however, nearly crying; Dagger actually had to use the brim of Vivi's hat to dry her eyes; Amarant had to prop himself up on the side of the cabin; Freya was making a conscious effort not to snort as she tended to do when laughing a lot; Eiko was rolling around on the cabin floor, occasionally banging her fists as she tried to contain her laughter .
Face burning with humiliation, Steiner composed himself as best he could and walked to the deck, where the noise of the engine diminished the shouts of raucous laughter that continued to echo around the cabin for several more minutes.
When the final giggles had subsided, he returned to the cabin. "Well," he said, with as much dignity as he could muster, "I guess we're just going to have to agree to disagree on that one."
Quina meanwhile had been standing by, watching everyone laughing at Steiner with a thoroughly bemused look on his/her face. "Why you all worry about how place name is said?!" she/he said. "You no can eat, so why you worry?"
Everyone looked at Quina. The comedy moment having been brought to an abrupt end, they all left the cabin shaking their heads.
