Frisk knew where to stop the boat, but they didn't mention it until they'd already passed it. It was an honest mistake, but it just made more work for Eridan. Huffing, he picked up the pole and tried to shove them back up river, but it was harder than it looked.

Finally, Eridan had enough of fighting the current and shed his scarf, cape and shirt. The water was shallow still, and he ended up wading through the drink to pull the boat ashore.

The ground here was different, though still back in color. The mushy swamp had faded in to obsidian rock, shining and warm. Vents of steam billowed out of holes off the path, and nothing grew here. The air around him was humid.

It was plain to anyone that something hot was nearby, but Eridan didn't know what exactly.

As he walked with Frisk up a steep incline, he found himself once again shedding his cape. Moments later he was forced to remove his scarf too. The air was becoming increasingly dry and stale. His pants had completely dried already.

Finally the hill crested and below Eridan saw the cause.

Sprawling fields of lava lay before him, hot and heavy like a weight on his shoulders.

"You okay?" Frisk asked.

"It's a bit warm, don't you think?" The sea-dweller huffed, "I ain't gaspin' but this ain't exactly preferable."

His hand found his gills, rubbing them as they expanded to gather moisture from the air.

"Oh, man, I'm sorry, I didn't even think about that! Are you sure you're okay?" Frisk gushed, turning to face him. "This happens to Undyne too, gosh. I feel like an idiot."

"As long as there's water sometime soon, I think it'll be alright," Eridan replied, a bit breathy.

"Sure! We'll be to the lab in no time!"


Eridan was having a hard time breathing by the time they reached the lab. He was tugging at his collar while Frisk knocked, er, had them buzzed in.

He took a deep breath as soon as it shut. Cool, air conditioned air flooded his lungs. His gills flared, trying to drink in the new moisture. He gasped and held it before he exhaled.

"I don't know what kinda idiot lives here, but this is hell on Alternia! Hell on Underground, whatever," he sighed, exasperated.

"Your not so hot yourself."

Eridan spun around, and came face to face with a familiar pair of fins.

They weren't exactly like his, but very similar. The… Woman? (He was using that term loosely, yet again) standing in front of him was taller than him, which was surprising. She'd shaved her head, except for a long, flowing red pony tail. She was humanoid and fishlike, all wrapped in a pair of jeans that fit just a little too tightly.

"Undyne!" Frisk interjected, "meet Eridan!"

"Eridan, huh?" And then she whistled, long and low, "wow. Not like I pictured him."

Wait, so she knew him, but he didn't know her?

"That's what I said," the human laughed. "Eridan, you remember me telling you about Undyne, right?"

Undyne, Undyne. That sounded familiar but, wait, hold on. This was the person that Frisk has mixed his Trollian tag for? This was them?

"I'd say I was pleased to make your acquaintance, but I don't know about that anymore," he snarked, puffing out his chest.

"Likewise, chump," Undyne spit, smirking.

"Guys, don't argue," Frisk said, looking suddenly worried.

"We aren't arguing, he's the only one talking," the fish woman sneered. Frisk huffed, putting their hands on their hips. Undyne rolled her eyes.

"Alright, alright. Whatever. I promise I won't hurt him or his precious ego."

"Likewise," Eridan returned but it went largely ignored.

Undyne held out her hand. Eridan stared at it for a moment, and then he realized she wanted him to shake. What was with these people and touching? Whatever. He held his out to shake too. Undyne gripped his hand fiercely, and when she shook, she shook his entire body. He felt like a cartoon, being lifted to his tip toes by a body builder of a woman in a tank top. Finally, she let him go. His hand throbbed.

"Could use a better grip, but you seem like an alright guy," she laughed, "you little brat."

Eridan took a deep breath, his fins flaring to make himself look larger. He was about to start spouting off insults when someone else emerged from deeper in the lab.

"Alphys! Come meet Eridan!"

Behind a door jam stood another stranger. This must be the Alphys that he and Frisk had come here looking for.

"Come here, he's nice, I promise!" Frisk urged, beaming.

Alphys blushed a bright crimson and nervously twiddled her thumbs. She then brushed off her stained lab coat and adjusted her glass. After a few more moments of nervously standing in the doorway, she came closer. Her bare feet plopped on the tiled floor.

Eridan took a moment to look her over. Alphys was short, about Frisk's height. She was a bit on the pudgy side too. Well okay, a lot, but Eridan was trying to be nice. She was also some sort of fucking lizard and that threw Eridan through another loop. Did no one on this planet look similar?

"It, uh, it's nice to meet you!" She forced a grin.

Her grin was toothy, but strained. Eridan could see drops of sweat beginning to form on her bright gold scales.

"I'm quite charmed myself," the purple blooded troll replied, unimpressed. She didn't offer to shake his hand and he was relived. He hoped for the sake of every party involved that the short lizard girl didn't perspire like Equius.

He watched her invade Undyne's personal space, still forcing her smile. Undyne clasped a grey skinned arm around her and pulled her closer.

These two were obvious matesprits. How quant.

Frisk elbowed him in the ribs, smiling too, but this smile was genuine. Eridan cocked an eyebrow as if to say 'what?'

"You should introduce yourself," they replied, "they don't know you like I do."

"You already told them my name," Eridan huffed, raising his chin in the snooty way he was so prone to.

"Yeah, but where are you from?" Undyne was suddenly on him. She let loose of Alphys in exchange for a firm grip on his shoulder as she pulled him close to her instead. "And what's with the get up?"

Her grip on him threatened to shatter his shoulder blade. He looked up at the taller woman with distaste but she didn't let up. Alphys laughed nervously and averted her eyes from him.

"I hail from Alternia. It's a beautiful planet, really. Except for all the land on it," Eridan smirked at his own joke. "It's also got two moons. As for my 'get up' as you say," Eridan motioned down to his fitted black shirt baring his symbol, "this is my zodiac. It bares my blood color, purple, the second highest in our caste system, and my sign. Aquarius is not only the first of four signs designated for my caste, but it happens to be the same one that belonged to the ancestor of all purple bloods, The Orphaner Dualscar. I also happen to own the same weapon he used."

He produced Ahab's Crosshairs from his strife deck. He kept his finger away from the trigger and the barrel of the lightning shooting harpoon gun down.

"Holy shit!" Undyne exclaimed, "that's a big ass rifle for a squirt like you!"

"Yes, well, Eridan sniffed, "I wield it quite well, thank you very much."

"Where'd you get it?"

If Eridan liked anything more than history, it was talking about himself.

"Since you asked so nicely," the troll beamed, "I'd be happy to tell you. I used to do quite a bit of extremely roll playin' with a friend of mine. We didn't stop until recently, but about a sweep ago we plundered a sunken ship. We tracked that ship for sweeps, with map after map. You see, it belonged to her ancestor, The Marquise, Spin-"

"Yeah, yeah, okay. You got it from a pirate ship?" The talker woman inquired, blowing him off.

Eridan scowled. "Yeah."

"E-excuse me," Alphys stammered, "did I hear you say your blood was purple?"

"Yes, you did hear me correctly," the troll agreed, putting his rifle back into his strife deck.

"That's so interesting!" She spoke, looking much more relaxed, "I uh, I've never heard of that before. Do, do you mind if I had a look?"

Well that wasn't creepy at fucking all.

"I suppose, but I don't know what you," Eridan didn't get to finish his sentence.

Undyne took her free hand and sort of waved it over him. He felt his knees begin to tremble and his body faltered. It was like all the warmth was leaving through his chest.

His breath was forced out of him.

He felt something welling up in the pit of his stomach.

It felt like tenacity. It felt like resolution.

It felt like determination.

In front of him, a faded, light purple, was his blood pusher. Not his blood pusher. He was aware of the real thing beating wildly in his chest. In the shape of a stereotypical redrom 'heart,' so to say, something, some part of him, glowed. The purple blood's jaw dropped.

"What," he stammered, "what is that thing?"

"That's, uh, that's your, uh, soul," Alphys stuttered, she was back looking quite uncomfortable again.

"Why is that color? And, bluh, why does it feel like that?" Frisk questioned, looking between Eridan's glowing soul and Alphys. Eridan couldn't feel any changes in the air, but by the look on Frisk's face, something was off.

"It's Love," Undyne spit bitterly. "He's a troll, isn't he? That explains a lot. Bunch of war mongers."

"I'll have you know my planets army's have concord entire solar systems," Eridan wanted to fold his arms, but his soul prevented any movement foreword. "And what the fuck is Love?"

"Level of Violence," Alphys answered, "the more violent the person, the more murders they commit, the heavier your soul feels and the more uh, discolored it becomes."

"You've been busy," Undyne hissed.

"Fuck you, you don't know shit about me," Eridan growled, "put this thing back inside my body! How the fuck are you even doin' that?"

Undyne's hand fell away from his person and the heart faded from view, filling his chest once again. He felt whole again, and it felt good. Undyne's grip on him tightened.

"It's magic," she answered.

"Magic ain't real. Get the fuck off me!" The troll insisted.

Undyne threw back her head and laughed. "I just pulled your soul out of your body and your telling me magic isn't real?"

"Magic isn't real," he insisted again, "as much as I'd like to believe it is, it's not. I believe in science, not magic."

"Eridan," Frisk laughed sort of awkwardly, "magic is real. Monsters use magic to battle. Their entire body is their soul, this whole place runs on magic."

"Oh, whatever," Undyne rolled her eyes, "Alphys, you tell him."

"Uh, I uh, I'm a scientist! I have a doctorate!" The scaled woman tried, and failed, to sound sure of herself. "I'm a scientist, and I'm telling you magic is real!"

"Oh for fuck's sake," Eridan started, about ready to throw his hands up.

"Er, okay! Moving on!" Frisk interjected, "Eridan broke his computer. Your good with technology, Alphys. We were hoping you could fix it for him."

"I could have a look," she replied. Eridan produced his broken husktop from his captchaloge and handed it over.

"Oh, wow. This thing is primitive," the lizard woman laughed, "I'll fix it, and I'll make some upgrades!"

She was gone again before Eridan could blink. Undyne smiled, watching after her fondly.

"Come on you two, let's watch some anime or something," The taller fish person insisted, "she'll be a while."


Walking home through Hotland was not an option. Eridan and Undyne both couldn't breath in the dry air, so they were forced to take the river boat back to Snowdin. Lucky for Eridan, Undyne was much stronger than him. She was more than capable of pushing them back up river.

She walked them back through Snowdin, hanging around longer than Eridan thought she would. It was strange. She was strange, and she positioned herself always between Eridan and Frisk.

Frisk's house was in sight before she thought it was time for her to leave.

"Hug me goodbye!" She grinned, her pointed teeth overpowering what was supposed to look like a kind smile.

Frisk was more than happy to hug her, Undyne leaning down to wrap her too long around around the human's frame.

"You too!" She insisted, and before Eridan could protest she was pulling him in. Why was she so handsy?

He could feel her breath near his ear. This was getting weird.

"If you hurt Frisk, or Toriel, or anyone else I love, I'll fucking end you," she whispered, only for him to hear. "My spear is sharp, and I will not hesitate to put you at its business end."

And then she shoved him away from her.

"Bye guys!"


Toriel fussed and fussed over both teenagers when they arrived home.

She made them both shower and get ready for bed. Eridan first. He was in his pajamas now, and Frisk was in the shower.

The couch was comfortable. More comfortable than any couch he'd ever sat on. The blanket Toriel had given him was fluffy, soft, and white, and he'd curled up under it and warmed up quickly.

The lights were off, save for the hall light. Toriel had gone to bed to read, but only after checking on him five million times. She was a nice lady, Eridan decided.

Eridan was almost ready to go to bed himself, but he just had one last thing he wanted to check on. He ejected his husktop from his captchaloge and turned it on.

The operating system hadn't changed, but it moved so much faster. It also picked up wifi better than ever before. He logged on to Trollian at break neck speed. A message binged as soon as it loaded. Messages from hours ago had piled up.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling calliginousAquarium [CA]

CG: ERIDAN

CG: YOU STUPID SHIT SLOBBING, NOOK LICKING, BULGE SUCKING, PILE OF USELESS SKUM SON OF A BITCH

CG: WHERE ARE YOU

CG: ANSWER ME YOU SHIT STAIN

CG: MESSAGE ME BACK FISH BOY

CG: FISH GIRL IS FLIPPING HER GOD DAMN LID

CA: hey kar

CG: THERE YOU ARE WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN

CG: WERE WORRIED SICK OVER HERE

CG: BUT SERIOUSLY WHERE ARE YOU FEFERI WAS SPOUTING SOME SHIT ABOUT YOU BEING OFF PLANET BUT I KNOW THATS NOT TRUE

CA: actually kar I am off planet

CA: im on this cool little rock here called underground

CA: i like it here and the sun ain't too harsh like ours

CA: actually it might be an artificial sun come to think of it

CG: I DONT FUCKING CARE

CG: YOU SHOULDNT EITHER GET YOUR ASS HOME RIGHT THIS MINUTE OR ILL PUT MY FOOT SO FAR UP YOUR ASS YOULL BE PUKING UP MY SHOE LACES YOU GOD DAMN DIMWITTED GRUB HUMPER

CG: YOU MOTHER FUCKING SANDPAPER FACED ASS WEASLE

Well he was all riled up, wasn't he?

CA: I ain't comin' home kar I told fef that earlier

CG: DO YOU READ WHAT YOUR TYPING OF DO YOU JUST BEAT THE KEYBOARD LIKE A FUCKING MORON AND HOPE THE STRING OF WORDS THAT COMES OUT IS COHERENT

CG: FEFERIS LUSUS IS HUNGRY AS SHIT AND SHES SENDING TREMORS ACROSS RGE WHOLE PLANET

CA: kar I ain't havven' this convversation wwith you too I already told fef I wwasn't comin' home and I wwasn't gonna help her feed her lusus

CA: I don't knoww wwhy it's alwways gotta be my job to feed her it ain't like the rest of you land wwalkin' assholes that could givve a shit less about wwhat they throww in the ocean you bunch a goddamn finless bastards with less sense than one of equs swweat towwels could lift a finger to help me

CG: ERIDAN IM WARNING YOU

CA: wwhat the fuck you gonna do kar somebody's gotta feed her quick

CA: just cull somebody's lusus and throww it down to fef that's howw wwe usually do it

CA: in fact ask vvris that midblooded ball of crazy spider bitch has to feed her lusus too kill the kid kill the lusus

CG: WHY ARE YOU ACTING THIS WAY ITS NEVER BOTHERED YOU BEFORE YOU FUCKING VOLUNTEERED

CA: it's botherin' me noww and im on vacation

CA: maybe then you guys wwill appreciate wwhat I do

calliginousAquarium [CA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

Eridan signed off Trollian as fast as he could.

He heaved a heavy sign and stared down at his keyboard.

"You okay?"

Eridan jerked his head up. Frisk stood nearby, their hair dripping wet and dressed in their pajamas.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Well, no, not really," he replied, pulling his legs up under him. That made enough room for Frisk to take up the other end of the couch.

"You sure?" They pried, "I mean, I know I'm not your uh, what was the pale one again?"

"Moirail," he filled in.

"Yeah. I know I'm not your moirail, but I'll listen."

"I don't think you're the one who should be in the middle of this feelin's jam," he muttered, pulling up tighter into himself.

Frisk's gentle expression I remained unchanged. "Is this about what happened to your soul? What made it so pale and heavy?"

Eridan nodded.

He felt guilty talking to Frisk about this. Frisk was happy. They deserved to be happy. They didn't need all this nonsense of his.

"You killed a lot of people, didn't you?"

He nodded again.

"Did you have to?" They inquired.

"Yeah," he agreed, breathless. "I'm the Orphaner."

"You make other kids in to orphans?" Frisk clarified.

Eridan nodded once more. "I have to."

Frisk's arms wrapped around him, pulling him to their chest. They might have been small, but their grip was firm and caring. Eridan slumped into them.

"I have to. I have to and I can't ever stop. Not until a new Orphaner is chosen. I kill those kids parent and I leave them to die," words felt like vomit on his tongue. " I don't know what you're even huggin' me for. You should hate me. I make other trolls miserable like you used to be."

His voice cracked as he fought back a sob.

"My culture is violence, it's kill or be killed, but why do I feel so bad about this?"

Frisk' swords were calm and reassuring.

"You're only human, Eridan."


Alright, so the whole basis of this story was on a post i saw on tumblr and adopted as a headcanon. I can't remember the original poster

Alright, so Eridan acts the way he does (selfish, entitled, snobby) because he's the only constant in his own life. It's implied that he is the sole provider of food for feferi's lusus. That is a lot of weight on the shoulders of a 13 year old boy. Feferi's lusus is huge. He has to kill a lot of parents. He had to orphan a lot of kids. Orphaning a kid was grounds for culling.

He used to role play, and the way i read the comic, it appears Vriska was the only friend that he made that didn't die after he meet them. He hates land dwellers because they make up the majority of the population. No land dwellers, less kids to orphan.

This poor kid is surrounded by death and I would assume that even though Alternia is a violent society, he feels bad, just like Vriska did after she killed Tavros.

I hope I wrote Undyne alright here. I really like her and I wanted to do her justice. She immediately saw Eridan as a threat, but shes almost as rude as he is so? Take it or leave it I guess haha