Chapter 3

Simon again snuggled into Kaylee's hair; it still wasn't easy being blind. He still smacked into things and not being able to really perform medicine was a thing that he didn't think would ever completely stop hurting, but at least now he could picture himself having a future. And at least he wasn't completely useless, he might not be able to perform surgery, but he still had a wealth of medical knowledge in his brain that he could use to help his crewmembers with.

It was late on Serenity; everyone had been asleep for three hours except for Simon. He walked the narrow metal halls of the ship and counted. Twenty-two steps from his bunk to the steps that led down to the infirmary, three stairs and turn right to the infirmary door. Sixty-eight steps from his bunk to the mess hall stairs. Six steps up to the door and five steps to the table. He had done this for the past five nights back and forth through the ship memorizing the steps that would lead him from one place to the other. He only did it at night when no one was around to see him, the only sounds he could hear were the gently humming of Serenity's engine, the soft sound of his socks on the floor and the quiet tapping of his cane on the grating. He counted under his breath to himself; one, two, three, four, five should be at the table. He reached out his hand smiled when he immediately found the back of a chair.

"You're gettin' pretty good at that Doc." Simon jumped about a foot in the air at the sound of Mal's voice.

"Gorram it! I didn't know anybody else was up. You scared the hell out of me Captain."

"Sorry wasn't tryin to sneak up on ya. I just couldn't sleep, thought maybe some a that wine Kaylee makes would help." Mal replied chuckling a little at the expression on the Doc's face. Simon pulled out the chair he'd been holding and sat down at the table.

"Ya want a glass?" Mal asked.

"Sure thanks. Captain can you please stop calling me Doc?" Simon asked as he listened to Mal rise from his chair and walk to the cabinet to take down another glass.

"Why don't you want me to call ya Doc?" Mal asked confused.

"Its just I can't be a doctor anymore and I don't really need a reminder that I used to be one. It just brings up painful memories." Simon replied stiffly.

"Yeah I can do that, sorry I wasn't meanin to make ya feel bad. Just a habit callin ya Doc." Mal answered.

"Thank you I appreciate it. Hey Mal think maybe you could tell me where you put the glass? I really don't want to spill the wine, it will probably eat right through the table." Simon asked trying to lighten the mood in the room with an attempt at a joke.

"Sure uh it's like half a foot in front of you at about two o'clock." Mal replied with a sad smile. After Miranda Mal had thought somewhat better of the Doctor, but still hadn't liked him much. Since being blinded however Mal was seeing a side to Simon that he not only respected but really liked as well. Sure the first month after it had happened Simon had been angry and withdrawn, but that was too be expected when something that life altering happens to you. But Simon had really surprised Mal with his acceptance of the situation and the braveness he showed at learning to deal with being blind. Add to that the fact that out of the three men who had been there that day Simon was the only one who had reacted quickly enough to save Zoë and her baby and as thanks for that action he had lost his sight forever. Simon reached out then and after only a second of fumbling found the glass without spilling even a drop of it.

"Uh Simon…" Mal cleared his throat not sure of how to continue. "Um Simon I just wanted to tell ya…" he trailed off again.

"What? Do I have something in my teeth?" Simon asked.

"No I just wanted to tell ya, well thank you actually for what you did for Zoë that day. I don't know if I ever got around to thanking you and I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate what you did for her and I'm really sorry that you got hurt so bad. I should have been the one to push her outta the way, I'm sorry I didn't get there in time." Mal cleared his throat uncomfortably after he was finished. He really wasn't good at emotional conversations or expressing his gratitude.

"Um well I mean it wasn't like I knew I was going to be blinded when I pushed Zoë out of the way. I just didn't want her or the baby to get hurt. And I don't blame you for not getting there first. It wasn't something any of us could have seen coming, it was just a random thing that happened. Mal I actually wanted to talk to you about something and I guess now would be as good of a time as any to bring it up." Simon replied now feeling every bit as uncomfortable as Mal had a moment ago.

"Ok Doc shoot. I mean Simon sorry."

"Well its just I can't be a doctor anymore. So I don't really have a job to pay my way on Serenity and I don't want to be a burden or anything."

"Simon you got hurt protecting one of my crew, I ain't gonna kick you off my boat especially with the way things are now. Plus you're sister is all kinds a helpful on jobs. I got my own psychic, sniper, assassin. You really think I wanna lose her skills? You paid her way on this boat for almost a year before she was well enough to work; I think she can do the same for you for a while. And if I kick you off I'm gonna lose not only my psychic assassin but my mechanic as well, plus Zoë would kill me real quick if I got rid of you. I'm sure once you've had some time to adjust we can find a job on the ship you can do without having to see, lets just take it one day at a time for now." Mal answered hoping his speech was enough to put Simon's mind at ease.

Mal hadn't even thought about the question of Simon remaining on the ship. After Miranda they had become a family and you didn't kick people out of a family just cause they got hurt.

Simon took a long drink of his wine and grimaced at the taste. "I- well thank you Mal I appreciate everything you said but please if things change let me kn…"

Simon was interrupted by a sharp cry of pain then. He heard Mal's chair scrape across the floor and then Mal said, "Zoë what's wrong?" Zoë cried out in pain again and began to fall to the floor, Mal reached her just in time to catch her.

"Sir I think something is wrong with the baby." Zoë told him through gritted teeth.

For the first time in a long while Simon completely forgot about his blindness. The doctor in him took over, "Mal get Zoë to the infirmary now and then go wake up River." He instructed and began to make his way to the infirmary.

Once Zoë was on the table Simon pulled up her shirt and felt her stomach, it was extremely hard and Simon realized she was having contractions. "Zoë how far apart are the pains?"

"I'm not sure Doc maybe two or three minutes I haven't really been timing them." Zoë replied sounding calmer now that the contraction had passed. Simon knew the infirmary so well that even without his sight he was able to find his stethoscope and the fetal monitor quickly. He placed the stethoscope on Zoë's belly and counted in his head for a full minute while Zoë tried to remain quiet.

Mal and River both entered the room then, surprised to find Simon hooking Zoë up to a monitor.

"River are you here?" Simon asked when he heard the sound of people entering the room.

"I'm right here Simon what do you need me to do?" She asked.

"River you're going to have to help me, read the scans for me, take some of Zoë's blood, and find the medicine I tell you to find. Can you do that?" Simon asked.

He had wanted River to help him because he knew she was almost as familiar with medical equipment and jargon as he was, but he hadn't thought until now about how much River hated the infirmary and medical equipment. The one thing he really didn't need was his sister having an episode.

"I can do it Simon don't worry. Just tell me what you want me to do." River replied confidently. They worked for the next hour to stop Zoë's premature labor. Simon used his sense of hearing and touch to examine Zoë and River provided him with an assistant who could do what his eyes could not. After another hour Zoë had not had any more contractions and her blood pressure as well as the baby's heart rate had returned to normal.

"Zoë I think we got the labor stopped but you're going to have to keep taking the medicine I had River give you and you'll need to stay in bed for at least three weeks. After that the baby will be full term and we can deliver him or her safely." Simon told a very tired and relieved Zoë.

"Is the baby alright?" she asked.

"Everything seems fine, the scan River read to me is normal and the baby's heart rate is exactly where it should be. Premature labor just happens sometimes for no reason, but I think everything is going to be fine. I do want to keep a close eye on you for the next month."

Simon stopped talking and realized how ridiculous it sounded for a blind guy to use the term "keep an eye on you."

It was silent in the room for a few seconds until River began to giggle at the phrase Simon had used. Once the tension had been broken Simon, Zoë, and Mal began to laugh as well. They left Zoë to sleep in the infirmary that night so that she could remain on the fetal monitor.

River hugged her brother tightly as they left the room, "See not so broken after all." She told him before kissing his cheek and turning to head to her room.

"Well seems to me with River helping you can still be a doctor after all." Mal said as he clapped Simon on the back. "You did a real good job today Doc."