Part III
Maybe it was my kind of magic that three weeks later I got a letter which said I was among five lucky people who were going to visit London. That morning started the usual way. It was my day off by the way. So I woke up at half past ten then went to the bathroom, I took a shower and at the end I glimpsed at my reflection in the mirror, it had never made me very happy and that morning it did not change. Couple of eyes and shaggy hair. Nothing special.
Well sometimes this sad look could be altered with the help of make up and a comb. But before that I should drink a cup of coffee and eat buttered toast. I put some clothes on I mean jeans and a T-shirt. I was home alone as it was a week day and everyone from my family went either to work or to school. I tried to leave as quickly as possible before anyone would return.
So I put a little amount of make up, comb my hair and got out. But when I went past mail boxes I saw a whitish piece of something in our box. Luckily I always have post key on me so I opened the box. I did not just open as my heart was beating madly and hands were trembling so at first I dropped the key. At last I coped with the lock and took a white envelope with some stamps and black words on it. Luckily it was the only thing in our box because if it was not so I would have real trouble managing a pile of post.
Then still being in a kind of dream I tore the envelope. My trembling fingers opened the envelope from the sixth or seventh time And oh yes there was a confirmation of my victory inside. I WON THE CONTEST!
But I did not realize it at once and to be more precise I could not manage to read it at first as my eyes were fogged with emotions and my hands were trembling and finally I lost my ability to read.
Three minutes passed and finally I understood what had just happened. I looked in front of me, smiled then tears filled my eyes and at last my legs understood the immensity of the event and failed me. I found myself sitting on the floor fortunately I fell backwards and did not break my noise or something. I do not know for how long I was sitting and rejoicing at my win.
When I felt the coldness of the tiles under my body I hastily got up. Again fortunately then during these ten minutes of my fight with my emotions nobody entered the building and no one decided to leave it either. So I just shook off the dust from my jeans and went out still holding the letter.
I was holding it in my right hand, it was just a piece of massless paper but I felt the precious weight of it. I felt tears in my eyes and my head was full of thoughts that were moving with supersonic speed bumping on each other. I did not hear any noise, did not feel anything or even could not smell or see. I was like in a good vacuum with one correction I still could breathe.
Even now I wonder how it happened that I walked almost one and half kilometer without being hit by a car or beaten by angry pedestrians. On my waking up I saw I was approaching our central park. I noticed an empty bench and walked towards it. I sat down and craned my neck.
Through the branches of a tall tree the sun flickered. I blinked mechanically. It was this state of absolute happiness that occurs in someone's life very rarely and some people call it nirvana. When you are there you become the part of happiness itself. You radiate happiness and this ocean of light is all around you. It is better to guarantee yourself a place as further as possible from reality. As this clash between reality and happiness could become a real nuclear explosion threatening to wipe out you and your happiness. Luckily thanks to my intuition I found myself in the park.
Moreover it was daytime and a weekday so the Universe left me alone with my happiness or maybe it was just inside me. So nothing in this world could deprive me from that moment. At last I looked at the letter once again and this time it was totally unemotional. I read thoroughly and found out very many new facts. I had to visit the editorial office, make sure that my documents were in order and ask my boss for three weeks leave. It somewhat sobered me up and I became aware of who I was, where I was, what I was doing, why I was in the park.
I took a deep breath, folded up letter and carefully put it into my jeans pocket. I got up and went home. I walked quickly as now I had lots of things to do and my intoxication from my win had vanished. I was calm, happy and ready to act. I ran up the stairs to our second floor. I opened the door took off my shoes.
I went to my room, opened my drawer with documents took a pile of papers and sorted it. I put all that I needed into a yellow plastic folder, put it into my bag and checked for my purse and then left the house.
I walked to the bus stop. While I was waiting for the bus I took out my phone and searched for my boss's number. It was not very difficult as I have this touch screen. My phone can do lots of useful tricks: it has a camera, lots of applications and of course games which you can play when none of other activities is available.
"Good afternoon, it's Melina. I need to talk to you. Are you at the hotel? Yes. Ok. I'll be in twenty minutes. No, no. Everything is ok. It's just a talk. I'll see you." I said very quickly as a tongue-twister. We are getting on well with my boss so sometimes conversations of such type happen. I am so happy to have a friend as a boss. I could not feel myself well if I was under pressure at work. I like freedom and creativity and this can be easily suppressed by any authority.
"Well, Lina, it's nice, really nice, you're the first who did won something in my lifetime." My boss smiled at me.
He is about forty-five years old a bit overweight with dyed hair and eyes of a young man. His outside has nothing in common with his inside. When people see him for the first time they think he is an angry old man with diseased organs. But in truth he is fond of sport and his attitude to life is one of a 12-year-old youngster. He never smiles at strangers as he has had a grand experience of life and knows what people really are. But if he gets to know you better you will be grateful to life that you met him. As for me I always praise his sense of humour. When I entered his office he smiled and shook my hand as he always did to anybody who was nice. I won this status after three months of our boss and employer relationship.
"Well, how will you surprise me? This time…" asked he still smiling.
"I want four weeks of holidays. Could you please let me ….um… have it?" I was nervous a bit nevertheless I was sure in success and I smiled back.
"But you've had your holidays two months ago. Don't you think it's a bit too often?" he abruptly pulled a serious face.
I was puzzled as I did not know whether he was testing me or he had a bad mood. Or it might be another reason. So I just put on my most stupid smile and looked at my boss with my cutest puppy eyes.
"Again, your age does not make you smarter? Wild folly teen behaviour, am I right? We're not strangers Melina." He sat into his large black leather arm chair.
"Yes, you're right … um …. as always. I don't think I'll survive if you refuse me." I said it almost unconsciously. But when my mind acknowledged my words I looked up at my boss and I was ready to see thunderbolts in his eyes. But he was smiling as my dad used to smile at me when I was five and asked him for another ice-cream and we both didn't want mum to find out and my dad always bought me as many ice-creams as I asked.
"Well… OK.. just bring something interesting from where you're going to. And by the way where're you going?" He leaned forward a bit. His eyes were full of cunning light.
"Mmm… England… London. I mean."
"Interesting enough. So will you? Lina? Tea will do."
"Well…".
"You have your leave." He laughed.
My first intention was to hug him but I could not risk my job. I just thanked him though I don't actually remember the words I was saying but I remember that even when I closed the door I was still thanking him. When I hit someone on the street and he cursed: I woke up and stopped thanking at last.
People might have thought I am mad. But yes of course I was mad because of the perspective in front of me. I don't remember that week of preparations either. It was a rotation of people, things, papers. I spoke a lot with my mum as she didn't approve my idea of leaving. She hoped I would finally find a nice job and a much nicer guy and wouldn't waste a month of my life on dubious enterprise. But it was her perception of me.
I was a different type. Absolutely! So finally I had to arrange a good-bye party for my friends. We went to supermarket with Nina and Anna and bought couple of dozens of beer cans, chips, nuts and ice-cream I do not know why but it was me who insisted on buying three different types of ice-cream strawberry, chocolate and vanilla. My friends tried to persuade me that we would be too drunk to eat ice-cream not mentioning the amount of ice-cream I bought, 2 kilos.
I felt so bad because of the coming flight to London. I had never left my country I did not know how the things are in this outer world. I knew I would feel lonely and desperate to return as soon as possible but at the same time I desired to start new life, to leave everything behind. But as you know people never change they only change their attitude to situation or become even worse as few of us are strong enough to become a better person.
Coming back to ice-cream it always helped me to overcome stress and cope with heartbreaking so I bought medicine as simple as that.
Maria and Andrew were so kind to have us all for party. We put everything on a table in the living room. I ordered nine pizzas one for each of us and with different flavors of course. Interesting fact: I was the only one in the room wearing jeans, girls were in dresses and guys wore trousers with shirts. They stayed at home so they could feel relaxed and I was so constrained and chained with doubts and my tight jeans.
"So let's begin" said Anna when we all gathered together, she smiled at me and winked. "I want to drink for your success and great journey that awaits you. Cheers!" She lifted her can as we all did and drank in complete silence. It was somewhat tense atmosphere as everybody felt my doubt, fright and loneliness.
"Maybe we switch on TV or music?" asked Tanya looking at everybody in turns. We all nodded simultaneously. She came to the Andrew's iPod and turned it on. It was David Bowie's The man who sold the world. Nice for a start. Silence was broken as if somebody waved or traffic lights changed to green we began talking to each other.
I do not remember exactly the topics we were talking about but those seven hours flashed by with the speed of light and we even did not eat ice-cream. Ha-ha. All of my eight friends danced, laughed, just had a very good time but I was sitting whole evening on the sofa looking at them or examining my can, chips or my nails. I was so deeply in my thoughts though I tried to be cheerful and speak to my friends. They understood I did not need their intervention I just needed them to be here, to stay with me. Next day I was leaving…
"Lina, will you stay?" asked Maria looking at me with her big blue eyes full of tenderness. "Please!" she begged me even with her eyelashes. "By the way do you know the first night in a new bed you can dream of a future husband?"
"Really?!" my eyes widened and I giggled. I looked at my mobile phone it was already one in the morning. "I think I can, I just need to phone home."
I said good-buy to everybody. I hugged everyone and kissed my friends on the cheeks. Tanya cried and so her cheek was very salty. I smiled at her.
"Don't cry in three weeks I'll be back!" She hugged me again and sighed deeply.
Robert even shook my hand: "Try to save the face of our people in London." he winked. Dear Robert he cannot stand bad manners! I laughed and nodded.
When all six of the guests left I took the phone and dialed dad's number:
"Hullo!" he was nervous I felt it.
"It's me, Meli, dad I'll stay here with Maria and Andrew for the night."
"OK. But you know your mother were worrying and… you're leaving tomorrow I mean today."
"But it's night and in any case it's time to go to bed so it's better that I stay here and tomorrow will come home and …" my logic betrayed me I did not know how to continue.
"OK, darling. I'll tell mum" so helpful father he is. Thank you I thought to myself.
"Good night, pa!"
"Good night, Meli!"
Maria made a bed for me on the sofa in the living room.
"Don't be afraid it will bring you only good things believe me!" She kissed me in the forehead and caressed my hair. Then she got up, sent me a kiss and whispered:
"Oh dear powerful space with twinkling stars, may this girl see what she is doomed for. I mean her greatest love, love of her life." She winked and turned off the light.
I laughed and my eyes watered. She was talking like a conspirator. It was funny, she could be a good actress by the way. It was the last thought before I fell into deep sleep.
