"Drop In The Ocean"

Chapter Two - Desperately

- Something 'bout the way you looked at me
Made me think for a moment,
That maybe we were meant to be -

I smiled, leaning back into the burgundy cushioned chair of the theatre. I felt her arm brush against mine and shivered slightly, blood rushing to my face. I was thankful the theatre was dark because otherwise she might have noticed.

"Only real perk to the job. Free movies." I began coolly, pretending my heart wasn't beating like a hyperactive child with a drum set. I wasn't quite sure why she made me so nervous. Around her I felt like I needed to be on my best behavior, like I needed to impress her.

"Yes, it's tres cool." Paige replied, shrugging into her seat and turning her attention back the movie screen. We were sitting there watching some chick flick she picked out, and I just went along because...I couldn't quite put my finger on exactly why I wanted to sit there with her and watch some sappy crappy movie, but I was there. That's what mattered, right?

"There you are with the French. I don't know the language," I grinned as I continued. "But I do love the fries." Paige laughed, touching my arm when she did. I knew it was a gesture of friendship, but a lump formed in my throat and I thought I couldn't breathe. "Bathroom." I said quickly, jumping up from my seat and rushing off.

What was wrong with me? Sure, Paige was an attractive girl, but I wasn't into girls. I had never been before. Paige, though...her blue eyes shimmered like diamonds made of ice, her hair was soft, and her arms, welcoming. My favorite thing about her was the way mouth twisted up when she smiled. A real smile, not one of her fake ones. It made me want to make her smile forever. She was drop dead gorgeous, I knew that, and even beyond that she was beautiful. On the outside she looked like any average beauty queen, but on the inside she was as fucked up as I was -- she just didn't always show it. Those flaws are what made her so amazing.

I stared into the mirror, searching for some sort of answer in my own eyes, like they held the secrets of the universe. As I heard the bathroom door open and footsteps approach, I knew it was Paige coming in to check on me. Her perfume was present in the air, a smell I'd grown to love. Her hand fell to my shoulder and I turned around, making eye contact. Worry lines showed on her forehead as she frowned.

"Are you alright?" She asked me, not taking her eyes off of mine.
"I just feel a little sick right now, that's all." I lied, turning back around and splashing some cold water on my face. She sighed sadly, waiting for me to turn around again, and I did.

"I'll take you home." Paige replied quickly. I nodded in response and we made our way out of the theatre, and to Paige's car. Because it was late, the night was dark and chilly. Aside from the stereo that was blasting some love song, the car ride was silent. I noticed Paige starting to sing along when it came to the chorus and I smiled a little bit. I had always loved her voice- it had a strong quality to it, and it was stunning.

- Oh why can't I ignore it?
I keep giving it in but I should know better
'Cause there was something 'bout the way you looked at me
And it's strange that things change
But not me wanting you so desperately -

"Here we are," She interrupted my thoughts as she said this, and I looked out the window. She was right. There my apartment complex was, sitting there looking completely unfriendly. I didn't want to leave. When she pushed a strand of hair out of my eyes, her fingertips grazed my cheek and I smiled again. "Hope you feel better soon." I nodded, opening the car door and stepping out onto the cracked sidewalk.

"Already do." I answered quietly, walking inside and into the life I'd rather escape from. My footsteps seemed to echo through my head as I heard her car speed away and into the night. I opened the front door to the apartment, the smell of booze immediately reaching my nostrils. I quickened my pace and went to my room, closing and locking the door behind me. Finally, I could relax a little. Both Mom and Chad were passed out, which would mean no fighting for the rest of the night, and silence was rare in this household.

I threw myself onto the bed, not even bothering to change into sleep clothes. I closed my eyes, pulling the covers up around me. It wasn't long before I was asleep, and dreaming.

"Beautiful."

A/N: My inspiration is still going strong. This is a shorter chapter, but that's because I didn't want to drag it along. I already have all the chapters laid out, plot ideas figured out. There should be around eleven chapters; twelve if you include the introduction. Anyway, if you like this, please review, it makes me feel good.