Mally was pretty sure that this was the best sex he had ever had in his life. Who knew that being denied something could make its return so very, very sweet? As he lay beside Thackery in the glorious aftermath, Mally thought it had been almost worth hibernating all winter as an actual Dormouse in exchange for this glorious pleasure.
"No," he mumbled after a moment of consideration, shaking his head.
"No what?" Thackery asked, still sounding breathless.
"I don't ever want that to happen again," he said firmly.
"Really?" Thackery sounded hurt. "I thought it was pretty good…"
Mally blinked, fighting the sleepy feeling that was starting to steal over him. He chuckled. "Oh, Thack. No that. That—that—was feta cheddar amazing. I meant Underland."
"Wonderland?"
"Whichever. That place we came from. That place that used to be home… I have a new home now, Thack. It's you. If we can't be together there, then I'm never going back."
An angry fervor flooded through him, and he twisted the blanket in his fist. He glanced around the hotel room. The light was dim but it looked much like the last one they had shared. It was decorated in a pleasant woodland style, with minimal furniture. They had a table and chairs, a wardrobe, and of course, the bed…
"Maybe we are still there," Thackery said timidly. He sat up against the pillows and the blanket pooled at his waist, revealing the breadth of his chest, his tangled dark green and black hair and long teal ears flopping against his pale shoulders.
"No," Mally said, shaking his head. "I can see the theme park out the window. And this is our room, except for one thing."
Thackery looked around the room, frowning. "It's clean? I don't see any of your clothes on the floor or a sink full of dirty tea cups."
"Ha ha," Mally said, his lips twisting. "No, silly bunny. The bed. There's only one bed!"
"We really only need one bed," said Thackery sensibly. "But you are right, we did used to have two. Maybe we're in a different room."
"I guess I don't care which room we're in, as long as we are both the same species," Mally said.
"We probably should find out what's happening," Thackery sighed, but he rolled closer to Mally and snuggled against him. "How we got here…where the others are…if the band is back together…"
From the way he shoved his head at the Dormouse, Mally knew he wanted petting, so he began to gently scratch that spot where the teal ears connected to his husband's head. The March Hare made a soft, sweet sound of pleasure and Mally's heart pounded against his chest.
"I don't want to get out of bed yet," Mally said plainly.
"Neither do I," Thackery whispered.
"We could wait til morning."
"We could."
Mally paused and waited for Thack to tell him that they really shouldn't, but the Hare simply clutched him tighter.
"It was hard for you," the Dormouse said with a quiet realization. "I was asleep most of the time, but you, and Tarrant…"
"It was tea time. Always tea time," Thackery said, trembling. "I… I could use some tea now."
"There used to be a teapot in our room," Mally recalled. "There might still be. I'll get up and make you some."
But Mally didn't get up. He sat there scratching Thack's head and listening to the Hare's breathing grow more harsh. Next Thackery would whine slightly, then kiss him urgently, and then he would be good to go for round two. Mally smirked to himself as he plotted what would surely come next, but before he could coax this plan into fruition, the door to the hotel room slammed open, making them both jump.
"The frabjous day is upon us!" Tarrant Hightopp, the Mad Hatter, shouted as he bounced into the room. He was dressed in red and purple striped pants, a lime green shirt with sleeves frothed in an unlikely amount of lace, and his favorite large, teal hat. It was a very similar color to Thackery's ears, Mally thought, even as his pulse raced from the shock of the invasion.
"Tarrant!" Thackery cried with such relief and delight that Mally was almost jealous, especially when the Hare launched himself out of the bed and onto their friend.
"Uh, Thack, you're still naked," Mally pointed out, crossing his hands over his chest as the two hugged each other and spun around in a circle. "And I think you're definitely shorter now."
Thackery let go, seemingly unbothered by his lack of clothing – not like the shy Hare who Mally had married at all. His mismatched eyes were lit up with joy and a huge smile was plastered across his face.
"Tarrant's here, Mally," he said. "Tarrant's here."
Tarrant tilted his head and looked at Thackery. "Hm, I should agreeably agree with our dozy Dormouse. You are shorter, Thackery. Previously your head rose halfway up my hat…" He looked over at Mally. "And he is naked. So are you, by the by. I'm not. Should I take off my—"
"No!" Mally and Thackery cried at once.
"Thack, can you see if we have any clothes in the closet?"
"Stand up, Mally. I want to see how tall you are now as well," Tarrant said. "I'm exactly the same, of course. Absolem refuses to share any of his mushroom with me."
"I don't remember eating from the mushroom," Thackery said. "Did you, Mally? Now I'm curious. Stand up, won't you?"
"Clothes first," Mally hedged, uncertain why he felt uncomfortable being naked in front of Tarrant. Usually he didn't care at all who saw him. After all, he was an animal and he only wore clothes at all because Alice had thought it proper. Or perhaps nonsensical? Mally couldn't remember. After all, it had been a very long time since anything had made sense. Nonsense was far easier to understand.
"Sure," said Thackery, shifting back and forth on his feet. He looked eagerly at Tarrant. "Any chance you could make some tea?"
Tarrant took off his hat and began fishing around inside. After a moment he pulled out a large, polka dotted tea pot and a handful of cups. "Of course," he said, winking at Thackery. "You want the special blend, I take it?"
"What's the special—" Mally began but Thackery bounced over to the bed, kissed him on the mouth, then flung himself maniacally towards the closet.
"Let's wear some clooooooothes!" Thackery yelled. He flung open the doors to the wardrobe and began frantically tossing things in Mally's direction, though half of it landed on the floor. Mally caught a pair of jeans that sailed by, then leaned out of bed to grab the nearest t-shirt. Tarrant had begun setting up the tea things on the table, casually deflecting flying garments as he did. He had somehow made a sugar bowl, creamer, and a plate of scones appear as well. Mally's stomach rumbled as he saw them. When was the last time he had eaten?
"Thackery, you can stop throwing things," he groused, "And calm your ears! What's the matter with you, anyway?"
Thackery froze in his tracks, then turned around. His mad smile faded, and the sadness that stamped his features nearly broke Mally's heart.
"I don't know, exactly," he murmured. "But something is very, extremely wrong."
