It all belongs to Stephenie M. I am just lucky to dabble with them.

WARNING: This story contains drama, blush-worthy cursing, and (some) mature situations.


Chapter Title: We're Gonna Make Such Fools of Ourselves

Chapter Song: "Decode" by Paramore

Bella's POV:

"Hot chick coming through!" Alice proclaimed as she strolled through the front door with me dragging ass behind her.

I hated shopping the day after a holiday because of all the damn crowds pushing and bumping into me, but at least the day after Halloween was chocked full of great candy and black t-shirts. Plus, the shopping trip had been just the break I'd needed from Edward to start wrapping my mind around the sudden change in our dynamic. It was still hard for me to believe it had been less than twenty-four hours since the dramatic change in our relationship.

"God, now she's announcing her arrival," Emmett grumbled while rolling his eyes. "Jasper, tell your woman to know her role and stop acting like she's royalty."

Alice poked her tongue at her brother, blew a kiss to her lover, and then waved her hands at me, all while I continued to gnaw at the last piece of pretzel in my hand and get used to the air hitting the back of my neck. I'd gone more than short with my haircut; it was Keira Knightley in Domino super-short and angled to the left with a few spiky bang fringes—total rocker chick sheik. But it was the burgundy highlights that had me loving my new "do" the most.

"I was talking about Bella," Alice informed the room, her hands still waving toward me like I was a prize on the damn Price is Right. Any second now, Bob Barker would come out and give me a hug and an ass grab. As long as I got to spin the wheel and a new car with it, I wouldn't have any complaints.

"Holy—" Emmett started.

"Fuck," Jasper finished.

"Nah, you're not my type," I said as I plopped down next to Jasper on the sofa.

"Edward's going to fall over of a heart attack," Emmett said through his chuckles. I didn't even bother to ask how they knew; there were hardly ever any secrets in our little group—and most of the secrets were a few finer points about my past escapades. Alice and I would be taking those to the grave with us.

"I am so pissed at you!" Rosalie said, smacking me in the back of the head.

"Hey, I'm not the Grape Ape over there," I yelled, slapping her arm. "I actually have brain cells up here so no slapping them out."

"Bells, seriously! Why didn't you tell me about Edward?"

"Because before last night, there was nothing to tell. And this morning, you decided to stay in bed."

"If I had known the convo was going to be so damn interesting, I would have gotten up."

"That'll teach you to assume all that comes out of my mouth is obscure references and unsuitable public language."

"So true," Rose agreed. "B-T-W, I love the do. It suits your hostile side while leaving you looking sexy and sultry. Not that we already didn't, but we are so going to heat up BOG when we pop in this Thursday night."

"Bar of the Gods, Baby," Emmett said with a chuckle.

"You only think you're a God," Alice shot back.

For the first time in a long time, Emmett ignored Alice's teasing. He leaned forward in his chair, leveling his brown eyes on me. "So, Bells, what exactly is going on with Edward and you?"

I shrugged, not wanting anyone to make a big deal out of things since there was literally nothing to make a big deal out of yet. "Fra-twin-ward and I have decided to speak instead of argue and get to know each other better."

"You might want to lose the nickname if you're going to date him. He's never been a good sport about being teased," Rose pointed out.

I opened my mouth to try out a new nickname, but Alice somehow managed to get her little fingers over my lips. "Bells, no nicknames right now," she demanded.

I pushed her hand away and forced her into Jasper's lap. "Sure, Care Bear. I'll just give his dose to you until you give me permission to resume my normal name calling activities."

"This should be interesting," Jasper said with a smirk.

"I think it's going to be fabulous," Alice told him with a bright smile.

"I give it three days before Bella gets enough of his pansy ass ways and kicks him to the curb," Emmett piped up, running a hand through the mass of thick brown curls on top of his head. He rarely ever did that and probably didn't even realize he had the same nervous habit as Edward since it was a blue moon sort of thing for Em to be nervous, but it was there and I'd seen it. I just wish I knew who he was nervous for—his brother or me.

"Way to support your brother," Rose said, landing a quick slap to the side of Emmett's arm.

While Em was distracted with glaring up at Rose, I tossed a pillow and smacked him in the side of the head. "Edward's not a pansy. He just hasn't found anything worth fighting for yet."

Emmett snorted and grinned. "And what? You're going to be it?"

"Of course not. I'm just saying he's not a pansy," I replied. "And where the hell is he? These pansy versus non-pansy arguments are always more fun when the target is in the room."

"He's in the garage," Jasper answered. "Jake's looking over the Volvo with him."

"No talking about me when I'm not here to enjoy it," I said as I headed for the garage door.

"That must have been some crazy sex last night for her to be mostly mellow and have gotten her hair cut," Rose said, making sure I heard her.

I stopped with my hand on the doorknob and turned toward her, giving her a big shit-eating grin. "Your—" I stopped and smiled wider, shaking my head just a little. "Nope, too easy. I'll save that guy for later."

"Oh, come on!" Emmett yelled out. "Bells, the suspense will kill me. You know this, woah-man."

I just laughed and headed into the garage, closing the door on any and all protests. I didn't even really have anything to say, but as long as Emmett and Rose thought I did, they would be tortured with the need to know.

Jacob and Edward were leaning under the hood of the Volvo with huge ass smiles on their faces as they listened to the engine running. Edward had on jeans and a black polo, looking like he'd stepped right off a casual men's magazine. I'd always been more partial to tight jeans and fitted t-shirts, preferring to see the goods, but this look suited those broad shoulders of his.

I watched them for a few seconds more before letting them know I was there. "Do I need to go back out and give you two pervs some privacy? Jacob jerking off to a car is on my list of extremely possible events to never witness in any lifetime."

Jacob's head shot up at the sound of my voice. He gave me a big grin and then a wolf whistle. "Hot chick in the room," he said, grinning at me again.

Edward didn't say a word. He just strode across the garage, yanked me off the last step, and laid a kiss on me that had my head spinning and my heart sputtering. I could so get used to this kind of adrenaline rush.

"What the hell, Edward?" Jacob screeched, breaking up our kiss just as I got my legs around Edward's waist.

I growled as I put my feet on the ground, glaring daggers at Jacob. "Problem?"

"Other than the fact that he just shoved his tongue down your throat?" Jacob yelled, pointing a finger in Edward's direction.

I crossed the garage in four long strides and the anger I felt inside must have been pretty damn evident because Jacob backed up and smacked his head on the concrete wall behind him. "Are you my boss?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"No," he squeaked.

"My father?"

"No. But, Bells, I—"

I interrupted whatever lame ass thing he was about to sputter out. "Did I say anything to you about running off with Jessica last night?"

He sighed and hung his head. "No."

"Then what the fuck gives you the right to say a word about who I kiss?"

"Sorry," he said, lifting his eyes up. At least the little pain-in-the-ass was being sincere. "I just … I wasn't expecting it, you know. The two of you either don't speak or argue. I'm just watching out for you, Bells."

"Yeah, well, a lot can happen in less than twenty-four hours, Jakey," I replied, ruffling his cropped black hair to show him he would live.

A set of hands on my hips pulled me away from Jacob and into a solid chest before wrapping tightly around my mid-section. I smirked at Edward's first showing of possessiveness; I also found it incredibly hot.

"I take full responsibility for our not speaking," Edward said, the words vibrating through my back. "And I can guarantee you that no matter where we go from here, I'll always speak to her in the future."

"Unless I ban him from speaking and then he can only give eye-rolls to communicate," I threw in. I didn't like this sudden feeling of being given permission to date Edward, especially not from Jake of all people.

"I hate that punishment," Jacob replied.

"Then get out of this garage before I decide to enforce it on you," I threatened.

Jacob nodded and then pushed off from the wall, walking over to the car and closing the hood. "Tell Alice to keep her hands off your car and you shouldn't have any more issues with the Volvo," he said before disappearing into the house.

Edward let me go to duck inside the car and turn off the engine. The second his head was clear of the doorjamb, I had him pressed between the car and my body, and groaning at the contact.

"Is this happiness because your car is running again or might it have a little something to do with me?" I asked, giving the innocent look even as I rubbed against him again.

His hands gripped my hips and pulled my body flush with his. "All you," he promised before crashing his lips against mine.

I could clearly picture myself opening the back door of the Volvo, pulling him in with me, and defiling his car in the best possible ways. I could also see how easily we could get so distracted by the sex that we didn't take the time to create a real relationship with each other. While a purely physical relationship with Edward would be phenomenal in so many glorious ways, I wanted more than a good time with him. And also, I wasn't about to risk friendships and my own sanity for sexual gratification alone.

"Edward," I said, trying to make my voice sound strong even though I didn't really feel that way.

"I love your hair," he mumbled against my lips before kissing them again. "I loved your old hairstyle too, but this seems to suit you more. Tough and sexy at the same time."

"A little fairy thought it might be a good idea," I managed to reply between my mental chants to behave.

He leaned in to kiss me again and I pushed on his chest to stop him, getting a look of hurt and confusion from him.

"Don't give me that look," I told him. "There's honestly nothing I want more than to crawl into the backseat with you right this second, but we need to wait. And yes, I know how insane it is for me to say that after attacking you against your car, but I wasn't thinking straight then."

"And you are now by saying we need to stop?" he groaned more than asked.

"Look, we already know the sex is great. Now we need to find out if there's more to us than that. Take some time to get to know each other and decode first. Agreed?"

"Of course I want that. But I also want you," he said as he pulled my chest to his again. "I've wanted you for so long, Bella. The way you feel in my arms … I can't help wanting more of it."

"I get that and I appreciate it, but …" Instead of more words coming out, my teeth sank into my lower lip and I just stared up at him, willing him to know without me saying even if it was impossible. I could think up shit all day long but sometimes saying those thoughts was a real battle.

"But what? You don't feel the same?"

"No, Edward …" I leaned my head back and looked up at the garage ceiling. Maybe some part of me actually expected to find an answer written there, I wasn't sure. I just knew that letting someone in, even a little, had never been anything I was good at.

His hand settled against the back of my neck and gently pushed until our eyes met. "Bella, whatever it is, you can tell me."

"You said this morning on the stairs that you wanted to know me. You said you were interested in more than just my body."

"And I meant it."

"And I want to believe it. But I need to see it, Edward. I need to know that you'll talk to me if all we're doing is sitting together on a sofa surrounded by our friends. I need proof that your sudden interest in me really isn't just about sleeping with me."

The hand he had on my neck moved to my cheek and his thumb brushed against the corner of my mouth. "I will prove it to you. If you want to wait, we'll wait. However long you need."

A breathed a sigh of relief and mumbled a "thank you" into his chest while hugging him tightly. I hadn't realized until now that part of me had expected he wouldn't agree.

He'd put his chin on the top of my head so when he spoke, his words vibrated through me. "I've been thinking about what we should do for our first date."

"And?" I asked when he didn't give more information. "Wait! Before you respond, you should know fancy dinners with smelly French cuisine and centuries old violin music make me want to kick something tender with my hard boot."

"Noted," he said, nearly choking on the word.

"So let's hear it then. Soundtrack, food, activity. What do you have?"

"Um … Soundtrack I leave up to you until I learn your musical tastes. Food would be pizza. And activity would be shooting pool." He actually shifted me further away and slightly turned his body so that his junk wasn't in the line of fire. But he had no reason to worry.

"That's the best idea for a date I've heard in a long time," I told him.

"So maybe we could go on it soon then?"

"We'll compare schedules and see. Definitely not tonight, though. I have a quiz to study for in my econ class."

"I've got a few things to look over for my classes as well."

"I guess we could study together then. My place or yours?"

"I don't have a roommate in my dorm room so my place would be quieter."

I shook my head in disagreement. "I don't do quiet studying. There has to be music."

"Another item we have in common." He smiled as his fingers slid beneath my top to caress my lower back. I had to bite down on my lip to keep from moaning—and from changing my mind about the waiting thing.

"We should get out of here and go join the others," I said. Apparently my body didn't exactly agree with that because even as the words were leaving my mouth, the rest of me was busy inching closer to Edward.

"We should," he agreed. He didn't move or let go of me, though.

"Maybe this is alright for a few more minutes."

His response was a smile and a soft kiss. I'd had plenty of kisses in my time, but none like this one. It was sweet and caring … and scary as all fuck! What the hell was he doing caring about me so soon? He didn't even know me yet. Give me hot and heavy and I knew exactly how to handle and reciprocate. But this … Just like that, I was back to debating if this was a wise choice.

He must have sensed my reluctance because he ended the kiss quickly, though he didn't question it or say a word about it. He just took my hand, squeezed my fingers, and brought me into the house with him.

"Her hair seems in place and his always looks that way. I think the Volvo is pure and innocent for another day," Rose said with a smirk.

"Jeep's got more room to maneuver," I replied the second her lips stopped moving.

"Oh, hell no!" Emmett roared as he vaulted over the back of the sofa and flew toward the garage door.

"Bells?" Alice questioned.

"Of course not," I said, sitting on the arm of the chair Edward had just plopped himself into. "If I was going to fuck your brother's brains out in the garage, I would take my time and do it right. I only said that shit to mess with Emmett."

"If you ever lose gainful employment with the coffeehouse, it's nice to know you have torturing your friends to fall back on," Jacob said around a mouthful of sandwich. At least I think it was a sandwich. I couldn't find any bread—just meat and cheese.

"Don't worry, Fido. I'm not nearly done with you yet," I replied. "You're just lucky I have to get back to PSU today. But Thanksgiving is just around the corner."

"That's my cue to get out of here. See you guys next time you're in Forks," Jake called as he strolled out of the front door, still munching on that monstrosity that may or may not have been a sandwich.

"Jasper and I are going to head out. We have a few errands to run before we get back to campus," Alice announced.

I reached out and caught her wrist as she passed, locking eyes with her. "Ali, that thing you were supposed to mention today. Is it still on?"

She nodded and turned her nervous green eyes toward Edward. "Dinner's at seven at the apartment. It's non-negotiable before you even ask. In fact, Bella just make him stay at the apartment when he drops you off."

"Oh, I guess I could force myself to spend a little more time around him," I said, throwing a wink at Edward so he would know I was teasing.

"Bells, why do you lie and hurt my feelings?" Emmett asked as he appeared beside me.

I rubbed his arm and smiled up at him. "Because you make it so easy and fun, Sweetheart."

He huffed and went over to Rose, laying his head on her chest and pouting like a damn five year old. She whispered something into his ear, turning his pout into a leer as whatever dirty thing she'd said became a fantasy in his head.

"We're outtie. Don't forget about dinner, Em and Rose," Alice said as she grabbed her tiny purse and Jasper picked up her two giant luggage bags. We'd only been home three days but she'd packed like we were headed on safari for a week.

"We'll be there," Rose assured her. "We should get going too. We still have to stop in and say 'bye' to my parents."

"Yeah, I have to get the rest of my crap out of Charlie's," I said as I stood. "You guys drop me off and then Edward can pick me up when he's ready to head back."

"Ed? Sound good?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah, sure," he replied. "It shouldn't take me more than a half hour to finish up and leave here."

"Take your time," I told him. "Charlie will probably be at Sue's anyway."

He shook his head as he pulled me closer, his voice low and soft. "My time will be much better spent around you."

I snorted at his sappy line. "Yeah, okay. See you, Cullen."

I turned to leave but found myself facing Edward again with his lips on mine. This time his kiss was hard, hot, and sexy as all hell. Why did I need to go get school books when there was a perfectly good bedroom upstairs? Because you want to do this thing the right way!

I realized my ears were ringing right about the same time I figured out I'd stopped breathing. My lips left his, expelling carbon dioxide and pulling in a big whiff of clean oxygen.

"Come on, Bells," Rose said with a laugh as she pulled me away from Edward. "You can play with Edward later. We have parents to see and bags to grab."

"You okay there?" Emmett asked, snapping his fingers in front of my face.

"Perfect," I lied. I would have gotten away with it too if I hadn't been so dizzy from Edward's kiss that I missed a step and nearly face-planted on the garage floor.

"Yeah, you're real perfect," Emmett laughed as he held me up.

"Little hint, Bells," Rose said as we got into the Jeep. "Wiping the dazed look of your face will help you sell that 'perfect' lie."

I groaned, knowing full well that the short ride to Charlie's would be full of teasing and taunts from my friends—and knowing I damn well deserved it. And then I smiled a little, glad that someone was actually making me feel so good.


"Oh, come on!" I screamed at the television while jumping to my feet and pointing at the sideline on the screen. "What the hell kind of call is that? His foot was so out of bounds! Get some fucking glasses, you damn blind ass bastard!"

"Um … Bella?"

I spun around to find Edward standing in the doorway with his hand on the back of his neck and a sheepish look on his face.

"I knocked, but—"

I waved my hand to cut off his apology. "I never would have heard you. One of the many bad habits I picked up from Charlie is having the volume turned up too loud."

"Um … Are you ready?" Edward asked, still looking unsure of if he wanted to be here.

I nodded while trying not to laugh at his expression. I turned off the television and tossed the remote into Charlie's armchair as I passed it. When I reached the edge of the sofa, I reached down for my bag, but apparently so had Edward because our heads collided.

"Holy mother of fuck me sideways," I cried, pressing my hand to my head as if that would really stop the pain.

Edward was too busy turning three shades of red over my colorful expletive to investigate his own injuries.

"Cullen, what the hell, man? Is your damn head made out of granite?" I asked. "I've got a damn bump forming already."

"Sorry," he mumbled, pulling my hand away from my head. He moved my hair aside and studied the injured area in silence.

I didn't do silence well so I interrupted it. "What's the verdict? Concussion? Bleeding in the brain? If it's bleeding in the brain I'm gonna be pissed. I just got this damn haircut and I don't relish a hole in the head. But if that's the way this is going down, then you better make damn sure your dad is the one operating on me. I'm not trusting anyone else near the wonderment that is my brain."

Edward chuckled. "With as much as you're talking, I think you're fine. It'll just be sore."

"How the hell did this even happen?"

He shrugged. "I was trying to get your bag for you."

I could feel my face scrunching up with my confusion—not the most attractive look in the world, but the damn man was baffling the shit out of me. Again! "Why?"

He gave me a look that said I should already know. "It's what a guy is supposed to do."

"Don't tell me you fall for those old gender stereotype roles where the chick is barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen and the man is sitting on his fat ass watching television and talking about how hard his day at work was?"

"No. I believe in manners, respect, and being a gentleman by carrying bags, opening doors, and pulling out chairs."

"Then what in the hell are you doing around me? I'm like the anti everything of what you just said."

"You have manners around my parents, you respect my sister endlessly, and I'm sure you could be a lady if the occasion called for it."

I wasn't really sure about how to take that answer so I skipped right past it. "I'll get my school bag if you don't mind carrying the duffel bag."

"Not at all," he said, giving me a smile.

We dumped my stuff into his trunk next to his bags and as soon as we were settled in the car and driving down the road, I checked out his presets.

"What are you doing?" he questioned, watching me from the corner of his eye.

"Verifying there's no soft rock favorites on this thing," I replied. I pressed down on the last button and classical music filled the car. "Part of decoding who you are is checking out your musical inclinations."

"Guess I lose points for the classical then," he said, stiffening up beside me.

"It's only French violin music that I abhor. Classical can be pretty beautiful depending on the composer. I like a lot of Beethoven's stuff."

Edward threw a few glances my way without saying anything.

"What? I don't look the type to enjoy classical music?" I asked, grinning up at him.

"No, not really," he admitted.

"That's what you get for assuming. I'm not all angry chick rock music. I like a little from every type of music."

"Beatles or Clapton?" he questioned.

"It's illegal to make a person choose."

"How do you figure?"

"It's a form of cruel and unusual punishment and therefore illegal."

He laughed at my reasoning, shaking his copper locks around a little and making one fall across his forehead. It actually looked pretty good lying there between his emerald eyes—it gave him kind of a James Dean-ish look minus the brooding expression.

I grabbed Edward's iPod from the cup holder and started scrolling through his playlists.

"You know, I think the battery's dead," he said, nearly succeeding in getting it out of my hand.

"The battery's fine," I told him, pushing his hand away as he made a second attempt.

And then I saw the reason for his sudden battery concern …

A playlist.

Named Bella.

"How very futuristic Lloyd Dobler of you," I said, wondering if Edward had ever watched any eighties movies and would know my reference to that gem known as Say Anything.

Instead of turning red from embarrassment, he turned a shade of green I'd never seen anyone pull off who wasn't on television wearing makeup.

"Trust me when I say that puking in your car is going to be a hell of a lot more embarrassing for you than me finding a playlist with my name on it," I warned him. "The iPod thing I would be inclined to keep to myself. Puking will immediately be reported to Emmett for help in torturing the shit out of you."

He nodded and after a few seconds, his face turned from green to pasty white.

"Don't worry. I don't find it stalkerish. Slightly insane, but then again, so am I so I guess that works," I said, trying to relax him.

"It's not really about you exactly. More like how I felt about seeing you so much and not being able to say anything," he said. His voice was so soft that I had to strain hard to hear him.

I wasn't sure what to say in response, so I focused on scrolling through the playlist instead.

Maroon5 – "Shiver"

Rolling Stones – "Heart of Stone"

Keith Urban – "She's Gotta Be"

Air Supply – "Here I Am (Just When I Thought I Was Over You)"

Kings of Leon – "Sex on Fire"

Rick Springfield – "Jesse's Girl"

Iron & Wine – "Flightless Bird, American Mouth"

Cake – "Friend Is A Four Letter Word"

U2 – "Miracle Drug"

U2 – "All Because of You"

All American Rejects – "Breakin'"

No Doubt – "Comforting Lie"

Paramore – "Decode"

"Pretty varied." That was it. That was the absolute best I could come up with. I knew all of the songs except for the ones by U2, and they were all about longing for someone, having your heart broken, and lying to yourself. It was private, personal, and had to be painful. I put the iPod down as quickly as I could, wishing I'd let him take it from me.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

"No, I'm sorry. I was snooping and that was rude."

"It had your name on it."

"Still doesn't make it right." Great! Now I feel friggen' guilty!

I always did something stupid to make up when I felt guilty, like letting Alice tweeze my damn eyebrows until I was a crying, sobbing mess with perfectly arched brows. Already I was thinking of the one and only thing that would make me even with Edward—it was my turn to look green as I imagined his face on seeing my stress reliever playlist on my own iPod.

"Can we forget you saw that and just talk about something else?" Edward asked.

I was all over that in a red hot second. "So is football your favorite sport or just the one you got stuck being trainer for?"

"I don't feel stuck, not with having Jasper and Emmett around. But baseball is my personal favorite."

"They don't actually do anything in baseball, though."

"Sure they do. It's just a game of finesse instead of action."

"Well I can't sit still and quiet that damn long. I have to be moving around. That's probably why I like football so much. Although, I gotta say I like those baseball pants."

Edward ignored the last part of my comment and replied to the first part. "The faster pace can be more exciting, but slow has its benefits too."

I smirked, pretty damn sure he wasn't just talking about baseball versus football. I leaned over and slid my fingernail down the side of his neck. "What are these benefits?"

His adam's apple bobbed up and down a few times before a squeaky sound came out of his mouth. "How are your computer classes coming? Alice said something about you swearing Microsoft built Excel just to torture you."

I shrugged. "It comes and it goes, just like my 'C' average in the class."

"I could help you with that, if you wanted. I'm pretty good with spreadsheets from following sports stats all these years."

"I may just take you up on that offer, Cullen," I said, smiling up at him.

"Anytime, Swan," he replied, mirroring my smile.

We spent the rest of the car ride talking about school and our classes, finding out that we knew a lot of the same people and teachers. Edward had a minor in business administration in hopes that he would one day have his own sports trainer business. As for me, I was on track for a basic business degree because I still couldn't decide what I wanted to do for a career. I had too many options to decide from at this point; the only thing I knew I wanted was to avoid spreadsheets. I was leaning a little more toward graphic design in the marketing field lately though.

"Wow," Edward said as he set my bag down on my bedroom floor.

"What?" I asked, looking all around. I knew I'd picked up all my dirty clothing before leaving for the weekend so that couldn't have been it.

"It's just … It's not what I pictured for you," he said. "The room," he clarified, waving a hand toward my bed.

I chuckled. "Expecting black walls with HIM posters?"

"Kind of. Yeah."

"I don't fit into any one category and hope to hell I never will," I said, looking around my room. My walls were a pale blue decorated with framed photos of bright spring flowers. My queen size bed was covered by a bright white down comforter with a ton of blue and white pillows on top. I had a matching white desk in the corner with my kick ass purple laptop sitting on top and waiting for me to get busy with my school work.

Edward's voice brought my attention back to him. "These pictures are amazing. Especially the one over your bed."

"That meadow's in Forks, you know."

"Really? We have something colored other than green and brown?"

I snorted. "Yeah, I was pretty damn shocked when I found it."

"Did you take all of these pictures?"

"Yep," I said as I tossed myself onto my bed. I patted the spot next to me and Edward smiled as he came over and sat down.

"Did you take the pictures just to decorate your room or is photography a hobby?"

"Kind of both and neither at the same time," I said, stretching my arms up above my head and then relaxing completely into the mattress. I looked around at the pictures and chuckled as I remembered Alice's shocked face when I'd brought her the pictures. "Alice decreed my room had to have personality, unlike the one at Charlie's place. We were still arguing over exactly what colors I would use when I stumbled across the meadow. From there, everything just sort of fell into place."

"It's neater than I expected," he mentioned, his green eyes scanning all around. "Not that I thought you would be a slob. More like unorganized with the way you often seem to jump from one thing to another."

I nodded in agreement with his observation. "I cleaned before we left for the weekend."

His eyes came to rest on my face and he moved so that he was leaning across me without actually putting any weight on me. "Bella, about that playlist."

"Shut it, Cullen. It's your business, not mine."

"I want you to know my business, though. At least a little of it. I just want you to understand that however I've felt about you, I've never blamed you for it or felt like you should know it. I know I made my own pile of misery by never saying anything."

"I know you said last night that circumstances seemed to be against you, but why didn't you just take the chance anyway?"

"Because I'm not a relationship wrecker. Not my own or yours. That one time with Jake was the only time before last night that I knew for sure we were both single."

I grabbed a handful of his black shirt and pulled his lips close to mine. "You're honorable to a fault, Cullen."

"Probably," he agreed, his eyes flitting between mine and my lips.

"You're crazy to want me." I was trying to be open and honest with him. And also, I was a little afraid of how much I wanted him.

"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far they can go. T.S. Eliot."

I was impressed with his quote and responded with one of my own. "Life contains but two tragedies. One is not to get your heart's desire; the other is to get it. Socrates." I was living proof of that shit—Renee had wanted to have a child with Charlie, and here I was while she was wherever the fuck her boy-toy and her had gone off to live.

Edward's voice pulled me back into the here and now. "She press'd his hand in slumber; so once more he could not help but kiss her and adore. John Keats."

His quote immediately brought to mind the way I'd squeezed his hand in the early morning hours while falling asleep in his loose hold, leaving me without a thought in my head and too much warmth in my heart. I didn't know what to do with a feeling that strong coming from me and I was starting to feel claustrophobic.

Edward seemed oblivious to my plight; his focus was on my lips as they met his in a kiss of such epic proportions that I stayed mute for a long time after it ended.

There was something here with him, something that hadn't been there for any other relationship in my life. I was as excited to decode it as I was frightened by all the ways it could go horribly wrong. I didn't want either of us to end up dysfunctional or disfigured by whatever this heated, powerful thing was between us, but there was no way to find out if we could fly together without risking the burn. As long as Edward was up for the challenge, I damn sure would go for it. We were probably gonna make such fools of ourselves, but I wanted this too much to not try for it.


A/N: Hope everyone is having a great Saturday and enjoyed the latest chapter. I'll have a teaser up on the website in the next half hour so if you haven't already signed up for updates, be sure to do so!