Dedication Through Hymnos
Chapter 3: Differences
Written by: wrathie
Original Concept: Gust & Branpresto
Author's Notes: This is one of those chapters that I just wrote without thinking much... and yet turned out okay. Odd
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'That was a close one…'
Sighing to herself as she barely blocked a strike from another virus that threatened to behead her with it's claws, Cocona took a deep breath as she spun her modified v-boards to strike that virus down, sending it to a short death when the Revyatiel supporting them, Finnel, fired off her song magic to decimate the rest of the viruses that were hovering and surrounding them.
It has been tough going ever since they added Tyria, Ar Ru and subsequently the final 2 personalities belonging to Saki-chan and Finnel-chan.
In this tower and this continent, everything is different from where she had came from, from the song magic that the Revyateil sings, the 'purging' system that their 3 Revyateil companions seem to all possess to the Revyateils themselves.
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Having multiple personalities in each other seems to come straight out of a science fiction book, but after seeing Saki-chan and her different personalities, reinforces by Finnel and later Tyria's ability to have 2 or more different personalities have forced Cocona to accept it.
She even became a little curious as to what kinds of personalities that Cloche-sama, Luca-san and maybe even Jakuri-san would have inside them… in many ways, it would probably not be a good idea to know either…
Their personalities seem to vary from being nice to the odd… and after spending much time with the Holy Maidens, learning about some of their eccentric behavior from Cro and of course, experiencing some firsthand… Cocona felt that they were better off the way they are, no matter how odd they seem to be in the insides.
She would be horrified one day if Cro or Aoto(not that she would ever let him) decided to dive into her and subsequently discover that she herself has some 'unique' sides of her that she had no idea existed.
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Yes, she had no idea of in the first place!
In that case, she would have to do the honorable thing to end her own life… especially if Aoto was the one who discovered it…
If it is Cro, she wouldn't mind that much as Cro would be able to keep it a secret between the two of them… who knows how many other ' little dirty' secrets besides hers that he knew about…
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Thankfully, if it was not for her previous dealings with Cloche-sama and the rest of the Holy Maidens, she would have doubted her own ability as a Revyateil… particularly so as she was not able to 'purge' like the three of them. But she was unique and has trained under Cro to be a member of the Royal Knights since young.
In the defense of her three newest friends however, their Mind Guardians were totally unlike those that she had seen and heard Lady Cloche or any of the Holy Maiden-samas sing… and their destructive powers scared her a little too.
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But for all the power in the world, all the leaf too, she didn't want to purge to defeat an enemy… well again, maybe for Cro… or to save Sasha-chan.
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'Daijobu Desuka, Finnel-chan?'
Smiling as she ran over to Finnel, who seemed a little tired after their latest skirmish with the virus, she helped the girl up and she smiled back at her.
Ever since the incident that had caused her to leap off the tower, v-board down to catch the falling Finnel, the girl had been very close and thankful to Cocona.
Even if in the first place she had been persuaded to stop contemplating suicide only after Aoto had persuaded her not to, her words didn't seem to persuade her in anyway.
Still, she took comfort in that fact that everyone else, even Aoto had greatly respected her even more after that stunt she had pulled.
Not anyone can boast of surviving an ambush, fighting back that cowardly bastard that had struck her from behind and YET have enough strength and ingenuity to catch up with the rest, save one of them by jumping off the same cliff and pulling the two of them back without the hero's help.
In short, she was pretty proud of herself for doing that.
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'I'm okay, Cocona-san…'
Even if Finnel has developed a tendency to treat her as a senior along with a reverent tone to top it off. That made her understand Lady Cloche's feelings a little better. She did feel a little distant from Finnel when she treated her with so much respect.
'Please, call me Cocona.'
She sighed a little as she looked around, Blue Heaven Peak seemed cleansed now, sort of… according to Ar Ru and Tyria, the virus threat won't be fully gone till they healed the Planet, even if the 'Mother' of all the antibodies are on their side.
Antibodies or Viruses act to protect the planet and all of them shared the view that Humans are the cause of the Planet's Pain and suffering and will continue to try and exterminate all of them till they prove otherwise.
Even Clustania is not safe now, but Cocona was sure that Finnel's Best friend General Ayane was controlling the situation up there by herself…
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Blinking back to reality when she noticed that Finnel has stiffened, she looked in her direction to see that Aoto was chatting with Saki-chan again, it happened frequently enough that it had became the norm but it still disheartened Cocona to see Finnel looking so dejected like that.
She assumed that Finnel is a nice girl, a little clumsy perhaps and although she can't measure up to Saki with her kindness and eagerness… she was…
'…'
Who was she kidding, Finnel had many flaws about her and her good traits are not comparable to what Saki-chan has.
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For starters, Saki had been truthful about what she told all of them, which made Finnel score double negatives as she did conceal many things from her, first of all sharing bodies with Soma of all people in the world and of course, lying to her about why she was interested in her(Tatsumi).
Saki was kind too, almost too kind but that trait was not a bad one… as compared to Finnel, who is constantly demoralizing herself, needing encouragement from everyone, especially Aoto to comfort her.
In short, even if Saki fitted the bill of a damsel in distress, Finnel forced herself into that role with only Aoto entertaining her. Cocona felt sorry for her, she did try her best in everything that she did and she really did led a pathetic life…. Which seems to be the only thing that stands out about her, bluntly speaking.
She wouldn't blame Aoto for finding Saki attractive but she did find it shocking that Finnel still had not gave up on hoping or wishing that Aoto would look at her just once and to give her some attention.
Something about Finnel reminded Cocona of a small kitten, begging to be petted just before she passed away in the unrelenting winter…
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'Finnel-chan?'
Patting her on the shoulder with a resigned and forced smile, Cocona eased her away to stop her from staring in such a forlorn way at those two. She supposed one part of it was that they needed their privacy and the second main reason was that it was getting Finnel nowhere if she is just going to watch.
Honestly, she did not know what she see in Aoto, which is different from Ar Ru, who she can read like a book or from Tyria, which she can gauge from her experience with Frelia-sama.
It seems that the boy was the one that she drew inspiration, courage and strength from. Her words were most unheeded, even if she does give her the attention and although she's good friends with Saki(Who isn't good friends with Saki?), she can't expect to draw inspiration or strength from that air-headed love rival of hers.
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Hikari Gojo sensei was out of the question as well, although dependable in combat and in his profession, there are things that patients and doctors did not share among each other, even with patient confidentiality and it seems that he respects her decision as well on this matter.
No, it would only rest on her shoulder to pull the girl out of her blue funk, to set the record straight with her. If it was severely affecting her emotionally and physically right now, who knows what would happen in the long run.
She had been excited that Aoto had dived deep enough into her to accept who she was and he probably found out why Finnel herself behaved that way and who she really is, thus unlocking the last Persona to the group, Suzonomia… another weird girl that Cocona had yet to be properly introduced to yet.
At least Sakia Rumei seems normal enough, reminding her of some of the Royal Knights and she had hit off with her relatively well at the start.
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If Finnel is to continue to be friends with Saki and with Aoto, she figured that she'll have to talk to her and soon. In the same time, Cocona herself realized that she was swiftly turning into the 'elder sister' of the group and she felt a migraine growing…
When compared to more knowledgeable people in the matter of the heart, one can swiftly point out Saki's Persona: Sarapatra for advice, but Cocona knew that she was fond of teasing others as well… even if her advice is generally good and true.
But it was that teasing personality as well as her infrequent appearances that made her unsuitable for the role, not to mention that she was rooting for Saki to find her true love, hence limiting her advice to Saki and alienating the rest.
It was not that Cocona favored one girl over another, it is just… she prefers it to be a level playing field… even if it is unrealistic.
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'… such misfortune.'
She sighed as the migraine really happened and she placed one hand on her head while Finnel looked at her with a confused expression.
'Yes, Cocona-san?'
'Call me Cocona… You don't look good… have you been sleeping well?'
Generally the girls slept in their own beds and rooms, the bounty that they was offered for ridding many of the monsters and viruses were sufficient to support all of them relatively well. Not to mention that Finnel and Saki would sometimes help out at the restaurants to pay off some of their debts when they were waiting for Aoto and the rest to bring more news on the situation.
For herself, she would normally be spending time with Sasha-chan in whatever way she could help out or reading up on new information that was provided by Tyria.
It was nice to not share rooms with anyone else, doubly nice when she was Tatsumi as she would rather die than share a tent with Aoto… when they were out camping, she would find an excuse to sleep with Hikari Gojo sensei instead, even if she believed that he did suspect something was amiss with her after a while.
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But at the same time, it made her feel a little sad that she wouldn't be able to share stories with her friends as well, girl only stuff like how she liked to when sleeping with Luca-san or in the rare occasion that Lady Cloche allowed her to slip into her room or tent to sleep for the night.
It had been nice, especially sometimes when Cro would visit her at night after speaking with the girls mentioned earlier. Most of her most precious memories were from those late night chats with her friends and she found it a little lacking amongst this group of friends.
Not those precious moments were lacking with them, the times that they shared in the dinner table for one warmed her heart at the lively conversation between all of them. They were, close together, closer than with her previous bunch of close friends, even if it seems bad to compare them that way.
But it was true, they had experienced life and death experienced yes, but they were not as emotionally tied to each other as in this occasion. They had no true allies save for themselves, she was in a strange new world, same as with Saki with no one truly their ally.
She had to hide her identity and it was nice to have friends that did not care about who she was and who was around the same age as her, it felt odd but at the same time she felt liberated from gender discrimination at the same time.
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For Finnel and Saki, it was the same for them and they had bonded together from having the same experience as well as being in the same circumstances as she was.
For Aoto and Hikari Gojo-sensei, they were very open and friendly people by default and from how Hikari Gojo sensei was willing to ditch his office and his reputation to help Saki had done wonders with his relationship with the rest of the group. She herself would trust him with her life after all he did for her.
For Aoto, perhaps it was his upbringing that made him so open and fearless, even if he was blunt… so different from the world that Cro had showed her when she was young.
Thus it was hard to tell whether one girl was getting more rest than another, or which girl Aoto would be spending time with that particular night.
She had the inkling that Finnel would be one that would continue to wait for him till she drifted off to sleep due to tiredness… and the dark rings that she tried to cover up with makeup sealed the deal.
'…'
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Looking at her intently, she was resigned to admit that the girl hardly possessed any self confidence at all as she wilted after a moment… at least she was getting better at accepting herself after Aoto's influence but she herself might still have a hold over her.
'I'm not mad at you, Finnel-chan… I'm just worried…'
She gave a smile and was gratified to see Finnel smiling back and she tightened her grip on her shoulder, showing that she did not want her to look away.
'… you've been staying up waiting for Aoto, right?'
The guilty look that she showed before she looked away proved that she was right and she shook her a little, looking over her shoulder to see Hikari Gojo nodding and giving them some space while pulling Tyria away to join Saki and Aoto.
The last thing she needed was for Finnel to break down in front of all of them, which she did almost immediately by crying into her arms, pressing her face into her chest while she awkwardly petted her shoulders.
Yes, it will be a long while before she could get Finnel to open up to help her with her issues.
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'Yes…'
She confessed to her awkwardly and Cocona sighed, unsure how to continue on briefly as she eased her to sit on a nearby rock before clearing her throat again and asking her.
'He didn't show… right? I think he was speaking with Saki-chan…'
She refrained from using the word: 'again' as it would hurt her terribly, but she knew that Finnel did expect that as her eyes became visibly more downcast the moment she told her that.
'Noo…Aoto was with Tyria-san…'
But she denied her statement almost immediately and she felt a chill run up her spine, was she stalking him? The situation might be even worse than she imagined.
It is one thing to be obsessively in love with someone, it's another when it turns into a exercise in stalking and Cocona felt extremely uncomfortable when Finnel didn't seem to think that it was wrong.
'I saw him entering her room while I went to the washroom.'
Thankfully, she added innocently enough and Cocona released the held breath that she did not even know she was holding. Perhaps she gave the girl too little credit after all.
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Author's Notes: I do like Finnel alot~~
