Disclaimer: I do not own either the Naruto or Percy Jackson series.

A/N: Criticisms are fine. Don't like, don't read. I apologize in advance for any mistakes.


~Chapter 3: Chaos 2: Apollo!


Naruto was furious. No. He was beyond furious! How dare that low life of a god – note sarcasm – call him, him out of all the forsaken immortals in the dimensions someone's pet?! He is nobodies pet! Never been, and never will! Oh, how that person is going to be doomed! He shall be doomed in the worst possible way imagined for someone like him!

He began cackling evilly again, like he always does when he was going to destroy someone's 'precious' things. For example, for someone like Kakashi, destroying Icha Icha is the worst possible doom for him besides banning Icha Icha. He would fall into depression and kill whoever did it. He did it once and managed to get away with him life.

Besides, it was an accident! But it doesn't mean he likes Icha Icha! He will never like it! He shall never become a pervert! No matter what! It was his ultimate promise that had yet to be broken yet and he is not planning to as he shall never become another Jiraiya. A few years of seeing Ero-sennin getting beaten to within a millimeter of his life was enough to scare him from ever doing something like that. Besides, he's asexual, so should it really matter to him?

But back to the matter on hand, based on his wise knowledge and large amounts of information he acquired, he managed… to find out where the sun god lived! Hooray for him! Doom to the Sun God! Apollo!

xxxxx

From everywhere else, Apollo shivered. He felt like crawling in a hole to hide from something that is bound to happen from what his predictions are warning him about. All he could see is that something will happen to his home.

xxxxx

Right now, Naruto is currently breaking into the Sun Gods home, undetected. He has one thing to say about the security around Apollo's house. His security, sucks. It sucks big time. If someone like him, who knows how to hide his presence were to break into his home, it would be easily done. But the thing is, is that most gods either don't know how, don't bother, or something along those lines so most gods have rather easy securities.

But either way, his plan. To break the god in the most horrible way possible, mentally. He knows what type of person Apollo is by one look. A playboy type that loves girls. If there weren't girls, something serious would happen to such a person. And, he also bet all of his gold that every male god is a pervert in some way. I mean, how can they not? They each have so many children and are 'all-powerful' so he bets that they are perverts. And there is one thing that would break any pervert.

Yaoi.

That's right people yaoi! Any guy that has a healthy appreciation of the female body shall break! After all, he did it to Kakashi once. He literally turned into stone, and fell apart as his dust particles flew away with the wind. That was extremely funny. Kakashi had to spend a week in the hospital to fix his mental scaring.

But back to his revenge, he first finds any, and all porn of any sort whether it was magazines, videos, books, poster, ANYHTING! And replaced it all with yaoi things. Next, he is going to start apply seals to the gods clothes. The seals that he is going to use, is especially custom made seals that shall doom any pervert of any kind.

A short explanation of what the seal does:

First of all, he is going to program it a certain way. The seal is used to attract certain things, be it people, animals, or some random object. A playboy god such as Apollo, will definitely like to go after beautiful women and woo them. He has the looks so it will go successfully most times.

This seals does the opposite. First, Apollo loves women. Beautiful ones. So he is going to program that in the part that repels things. So, if Apollo wants to try to go after girls, they will go away and won't be attracted to him. But it will attract gays and old, ugly women towards him. Kekekekekekekek.

This shall be his worst nightmare.

He even made a Genjutsu that will show him the worst possible things in the world and he shall die! DIE! From mental trauma! MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

THIS IS HIS REVENGE! ALL WHO PISS HIM OFF SHALL BE TRAUMANIZED! AND LIVE WITH IT FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES! And since this is an immortal, then he shall have it for the rest of eternity. How kind is he, is he not to leave such a kind gift for the Sun God? Right? Right?

Yeah right. All who knows him will definitely shake their heads furiously as they chant 'NO!' over and over again. One such person is of course, Kakashi.

Either way, he is now finish with his revenge. All he has to do right now is to plant cameras all over the place and then he shall be truly done, with evidence, blackmail, and laughing materials on the Sun God. DOOM TO ALL WHO PISSES OFF UZUMAKI NARUTO!

But first, he needs to get out of here before he is found out! And with a poof of smoke, he poof out of the gods home and back to the forest he landed in, cackling wickedly all the while as he waits impatiently for the Sun God to go home.

xxxxx

Apollo tip-toed to his door slowly. Eyes raking over his door and front mat to make sure nothing was planned on it. He cautiously place a foot down on his door mat to test it. He let out a relieved sigh when nothing happened, yet. Oh, he knows that something will happen to him but he will take it like a man. But still… a piece of his mind still wonders if he can back out of this and never go in. But damn it! He has a pride, you know! He will take anything that is coming at him like a man!

So he squared his shoulders, and warily opened his door and walked in.

"…"

Nothing seems wrong with his home? Everything is in place like how he left it. He let out the breath that he was holding as he walks toward his bed. Seems like he was just overly worried since nothing has happen- "AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" and he let out the scream of the century.

He fell to the floor, clutching his balls and butt where a pole was currently sticking out. He has just sat down on his bed when this happen to him. Why, oh why?!

Ahem. It seems that Naruto forgot to explain about this part of the prank of his. The pole is for pain, while what happened to Apollo's balls was merely extra pain! He made a little thing that takes direct aim at someone's balls, and attacks it. He names it the 'Nutcracker'. The 'Nutcracker' has a 90% chance of killing off your balls and make you infertile.

But because of the fact that he used to be a male, he rarely used it on another fellow male as he remembers the pain of getting kicked in the balls. But Apollo has insulted him in the worst possible way, so he'll disregard his former male feelings and get revenge on him, using cruel and painful methods, to a male that is. But still, part of his male feeling feels pain for him so he lowered the power behind it a bit. Just a tiny bit. But it is better than nothing.

Apollo has finally removed the pole from his butt and was now healing his asshole and balls. If it weren't for the fact that he was the god of healing (And Naruto's small mercy) he would have seriously loss his ability to make children! He thanked lady luck that he didn't become infertile from the vicious trap, and got up to go to his porn collection as he feels that that was all there was to the trap.

Yeah right. How wrong he is! He screamed a girly "YAHHH!" as he clawed at his eyes, trying to get the picture out of his mind.

"MY EYES! MY EYES! THEY ARE BURNING! SOMEONE! PLEASE BE MERCIFUL AND KILL ME!" he screamed as he tried to banish the image out of his mind. There was GAY PORN! GAY! PORN! In his things! He kept screaming and banging his head, until eventually, he just crawled away whimpering, hiding himself in the darkest corner.

xxxxx

Naruto is dying. He is dying from the laughter that is shaking his whole body as he witnesses what is going on with the Sun God. He eventually stopped his laughter enough that he could breathe.

"Oh, my Kami-sama! That was hilaaaarious! I did not expect it to work that well, but then again, I did place a genjutsu on that box of his to make him see himself fucking another god. That must have killed his mind! Oh, how evil I am!" he exclaimed as he wipes the tears that were leaking out of him eyes. Oh good old days! How he misses pulling pranks such as these! He should have done this a long time ago!

Now, time to go find another target~!

xxxxx

Zeus was getting impatient. He had called a meeting a while ago and every Olympian has assembled besides Apollo! Where in Hades name is his son?! He even sent Hermes to go get him. Now all he is doing is waiting for the god of messenger to come back. Ah, he's back.

"Where's Apollo?" he asks Hermes with raised eyebrows when he didn't see Apollo with him.

Hermes looked around awkwardly before steading himself and answering Zeus. "Er, I don't really know… when I found him… he was muttering in the darkest corner of his house, asking me to kill him… begging… I think something happen to him like what happen to Artemis and he is in no condition to do anything. Someone needs to take over his morning job for the moment as he is basically insane right now." He finished as he stole a quick glance at the Moon Goddess. She was scowling as she was still in her paint splattered state from before.

No matter what Artemis did, she could not wash off the paint! Right now, she is extremely moody and am ready to kill anybody who rises her ire. She would find and kill the fox no matter what!

The Olympians all around were in an awkward silence as they digested the information.

"…"

"Great, why is this happening to us in the first place?" Aphrodite decided to ask.

"…" was the answer as no one knows why they were being humiliated.

Zeus sighs tiredly before giving out an order to Hermes. "Go find the Japanese gods about this as they have a Fox god and maybe they can help out."

Hermes nodded in agreement. "I should probably go warn my son too, just in case to be beware of multi-tailed foxes." And then he left as Zeus adjourned the meeting.

xxxxx

Luke was confused. Beware of multi-tailed foxes? Why? He doesn't understand the warning that his father gave him but he will remember it as he was planning to leave and go somewhere else. His mother was going more and more wacko and he certainly does not want to be anywhere near her right now.

He just finished packing his bags quickly and quietly ran out of his home.

He will survive and find a place where he will fit in.