This chapter is dedicated to my friend, Dwmalove. Please get well soon!
I do not own Gakuen Alice.
∞•∞
There's a love that only she can give, a smile that only her lips can show, a twinkle that can only be seen in her eyes and your life that only she can complete.
To be honest, you're the only one I spent so much time and effort on.
You stand there. Your face is taut, your hair is messy, your eyes are dispassionate.
Listening.
Watching.
Waiting.
She is laughing at your best friend's joke. You dread the day you will no longer hear that tinkling laugh of hers. You wish that that genuine smile gracing her lips were only yours.
Her soft hazel eyes are blinking brightly, watching him intently. You wish that the twinkle in her eyes would be reserved for you. Only you.
You are waiting. Waiting for her to wave you over.
Even when she does, you ignore her.
You are jealous.
Jealous that she is not laughing at you, with you. Jealous that she is with your best friend. Jealous that she isn't spending time with you. Jealous that she may like, that she may love someone else.
Your heart contracts painfully at that thought.
Leaning against the counter, you catch your blonde friend's twinkling eyes. With a slight shake of his head directed at you, he smiles at her and puts his hand on her shoulder.
To your chagrin, she beams innocently up at him. Wrapping her hands around his chest, she squeezes him gently. All the while, that stupid smile is still plastered on her face.
Your hands are balled into fists at your sides.
Your teeth are grit together as you hold back your anger. Your jealousy.
With his arms around her neck, your friend glances at you. With a small grin, eyes twinkling with amusement, he mouths Don't worry.
You don't realize that you are glaring at him. You don't realize that your knuckles are white. You don't realize that you are rigid.
Suddenly she's bouncing beside you.
She is still smiling.
She grins up at you innocently and lands a light peck on your cheek.
"Loosen up!" She giggles. "I'm hungry," she begins whining, "May we go get something to eat?" With a bashful flutter of eyelashes, she says, "My treat!"
All this while, you are still holding your friend's gaze.
As blue clashes with red, you are forced to look away. With a shake of your head, you don't understand the painful pang in your heart. You can't bear the thought of your Polka loving someone else.
She's bouncing beside you again.
"Sure. Whatever. Let's go." Your signature phrase.
She pouts, "Aww come on Natsume, don't be such a meanie!"
She waves goodbye to your friend, shouting a quick thank you and a promise to visit soon.
You only stand there, hands clenched in your jacket pocket. "Oi. We going or not?"
"Coming! Coming!" She scrambles to the door and throws one last grin over her shoulder before skipping out.
She throws her arms around you, wrapping you in a hug. "Hey Natsume?" She mumbles into your jacket.
"Hn."
She flicks your arm, "Don't be so grouchy!"
"That's not what you wanted to say." You can't be sure. But you know. You know she is going to say something. Your heart starts racing.
Her arms are around you. Her sweet scent of sunshine and daffodils. Her brunette hair tickling your chin.
Your heart is skipping beats.
Her head is on your chest, arms still wrapped around you.
She pouts again. You can't help but stare at her under your long bangs. "Look at me please?" she pleads.
She has stopped hugging you now.
She is still smiling, but her eyes are serious.
"N-Natsume…" As she fidgets with her dress, you can't help but step towards her. As you snake your arms around her, she murmurs something incoherent.
You smirk. Again. "You were saying, Polka?"
You feel her shiver under your touch. You know her heartbeat is steadily increasing. You sense the blush spreading from her cheeks.
You hold her closer.
She breaks from you abruptly. Despite her blush, she still stares up at you.
Lips pursed together, she says, "Lean down. I have a secret."
You only raise your eyebrows in confusion. Unable to stop yourself, you open your mouth. "And what might that be, Butterfly?"
She flushes.
"Just lean down, you stupid pervert."
You shrug and lower your head to her ear. "Boo." You whisper, sending shivers down her spine. "What's your secret?" You whisper huskily.
She bites her lip. Despite the smirk tugging at your lips, you can't help but feel a tingling sensation flitting in your stomach.
She looks like she's debating about something.
Looking up at you, she tilts her head. Without any warning, she says, "You need a haircut."
At this, you arch an eyebrow. "Haircut." You echo, deadpanned.
In the blink of an eye, her lips are on top of yours.
Her kiss isn't deep, neither is it passionate.
It's short. It's sweet. It's soft.
But at the same moment, it was loving. It was a thinly-concealed longing.
It was her.
As you are wrapping your mind around your thoughts, she breaks the kiss.
She grins up at you. "I kept my promise! Right?"
You gather your composure. The smirk is back. But this time, it contains hints of a smile.
She notices this and her smile widens.
As she stares at you intently, waiting for an answer, you drawl, "Not bad, Polka. I was expecting you to break your little promise."
She blushes. "Yeah well, stupid. My mistake." She sticks her tongue out at you. "But I still love you." She grins.
You curse at your accelerating heart.
"Hmm, do I make you nervous?"
"Why would you make me nervous, idiot." It wasn't a question. It was a statement. Yes you do. You make me nervous as hell.
She pouts. "Because you make me nervous. I know I said this before, but I'm still going to say it again. I love you too, Natsume." She holds up a hand and grins, "But you don't have to say it! Because I know you do!" As she rambles on, you can only smile faintly and wrap your arm around her waist, leading her down the sidewalk.
"Yeah yeah, Polka. I get it.
I love you too."
"Finally! The second time in a million years!" She pumps her right fist into the air. "Score!" She shouts.
The two of you are walking down a bustling street.
She is chattering cheerfully beside you, content with her full stomach.
Suddenly, you stop abruptly.
Something catches your eye. Someone catches your eye.
The girl beside you sucks in a breath.
"Hi Kaoru!" She waves. She grins up at you and runs toward the tall figure. As she begins chattering animatedly, the woman watches her intently, a smile gracing her lips.
Why now? You send the elegant woman a glare as you catch up to your friend.
"Now now, Natsume, don't worry. I'm not here you take your little bird away," She winks as your blood begins to boil. "I just happened to bump into you two. Anyway," She pauses, giving the brunette, your brunette, a pat on the shoulder, "Natsume, you have a little date with the Koizuimi's daughter. You will be there, will you not?"
You turn your gaze to your brunette. Her smile has frozen.
As quickly as it came, it was gone. She is bubbly again.
But you aren't fooled.
You know this girl is upset. You know this girl wants to spend time with you. You know this girl isn't cheerfully agreeing.
You know.
What's more, you feel the same way.
"Sorry, Mom. I won't." Your voice is devoid of all emotion.
"What do you mean you won't?"
The petite girl on your mom's side butts in. "He will, Kaoru! Don't worry!" Stupid girl.
You glare at her. "No I won't." You snarl icily.
"Then it's settled!" Your mom chirps. "Lincoln Square, tomorrow at noon. Luna will be ecstatic, our reputation will rocket sky high, and oh! The girl is beautiful, trust me! You'll love her! Dates, roses, proposal, then by the end of the month, marriage!"
You just groan. You already know who your mother is talking about. Your eyes are narrowed into slits as you try to maintain your temper.
For her.
For the stupid brunette.
For your stupid brunette.
Without another look at your mother, you grab the girl's arm and walk away. No way in hell.
You want to walk away.
Instead, you turn around.
Holding the girl beside you close, you direct your next line at your mother.
"And no." You say coldly, "I will not go out with that slut. Never." With that, you walk away brusquely.
You don't wait to hear your mother's response. You don't wait to watch her face scrunch up in confusion, anger, then confusion again.
Only one person.
Only one person has your heart.
And that one person... She is not Luna Koizumi.
My only sunshine.
Much love,
Alex
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