Disclaimer: This world is still not and will never belong to me.
When Harry and Ginny returned from their shopping trip that evening it was in a stony silence, Ginny hung her coat on the peg by the door and disappeared swiftly into the living room where the rest of the family was gathered. Harry dumped the bags on the kitchen table and ran a hand through his hair, everything felt so wrong. He hated coming back to this house, a place that had always felt like home, that had always been so loud and busy but now seemed dead. He knew it was his fault. He was the reason their family had been torn apart. But he was so tired of the gut-wrenching guilt. He was just so tired.
Harry looked around the pristine kitchen that was supposed to be busy and cluttered, a result of Mrs Weasley's constant cleaning, and he wanted to scream.
A voice came suddenly from the doorway to the living room and Harry jumped out of his skin, grabbing his wand from his pocket and firing a spell without even looking, "Harry?" said Mrs Weasley again, looking shocked, she had blocked his jinx and stood with her wand out. Harry jumped again, seeing her this time and lowering his wand, "Sorry I didn't realise it was you." he apologised quietly.
"Harry, it's alright, don't worry," Said Mrs Weasley walking quickly towards him, her face softening. "Come here."
She pulled him into a hug he didn't feel he deserved, but he didn't resist.
"You know every morning I see you, and Hermione, and Ron and Ginny, I thank Merlin you're safe." she said pulling back to look at him, "War has away of living on after it's over. You feel like you'll never truly be safe again. You're still living in a nightmare because you've known nothing else for so long. But it's go to end sometime, life goes on Harry. Feeling guilty isn't going to bring them back. Not Fred, or Lupin or Tonks or anybody else." She took a deep breath that shuddered slightly as she looked at him. "What we've got to do now is remember them all how they were before the war, as the people we loved and who loved us, and live for them. Because that's what they'd want us to do. We owe it to them Harry. Your life is a gift, you should be living it." Mrs Weasley wiped a tear from Harry's cheek and squeezed his shoulders gently as she looked at him. "But until you're ready to do that, you're allowed to feel pain and grief, it's what makes you human."
Harry nodded numbly before Mrs Weasley hugged him again, Dumbledore had told him the same thing after Sirius had died, that feeling made him human. When Dumbledore said that, he didn't want to be human, he didn't want to live. But now, he'd survived the war, it was all over and he could see in some part of himself that he didn't want to die. He wanted a life.
"I'm sorry." Harry told Mrs Weasley quietly.
"Don't ever say that Harry." she said firmly, "what happened wasn't your fault, you did what you had to do. And nobody made him fight, it was his choice. And if he hadn't. If Fred hadn't died, somebody else would have. My boys are all so brave." she said proudly looking at him as though he were one of her boys too. "Sometimes I wish they weren't. But now all I can do is remember my son, who died fighting for something he believed in, and whose greatest joy came in making the people around him laugh." They both stood in silence for a minute before Mrs Weasley patted Harry's shoulders again. "Now. Percy and Audrey are through in the living room, but if you want you can take some dinner up to your room on a tray and have an early night. You'll see them tomorrow. Then I need to go and check on George"
Harry nodded, "Thanks Mrs Weasley."
"Call me Molly, dear." she said as she piled food onto two plates and handed one to Harry on a tray. "Sleep well."
Harry took the tray gratefully, he didn't think he could deal with Percy that evening, and walked towards the stairs. He looked back and saw Mrs Weasley still standing in the same spot, wiping the tears from her eyes for a moment before sniffing and turning to take the second tray up to her son. Up in Ron's room, Harry wolfed down his dinner, the warm food filling him up as though he it was the first time he had eaten in days. He changed into his pyjamas and lay in bed thinking over everything Mrs Weasley had said to him. He thought about the quiet house and how George never left his room and how Mrs Weasley seemed to do nothing but tidy and how Mr Weasley buried himself in his work. Mrs Weasley was right, he though, this isn't what Fred would have wanted at all.
"Mum's gonna kill you if you don't get up now, Kingsley'll be around in an hour" said Ron, early the next morning, chucking a pillow at Harry who rolled over with a grunt, and began searching for his glasses. It had been his first night of dreamless sleep and he didn't want it to end. "God, I do not want to see that house again, I though I'd left for good." Ron grimaced at him. "Don't worry about it mate, s'not like you're moving back in." Harry groaned and sat up. He wanted nothing less than to go back to Number 4 Privet Drive, he didn't want to know how much of a mess the house would be in, though he didn't really care about the possible state of Aunt Petunia's kitchen.
Harry showered and got dressed quickly, he walked downstairs and ate his breakfast alone in the empty kitchen, Mrs Weasley had gone out to feed the chickens and Ron had gone back to sleep. At ten o'clock precisely, Kingsley knocked on the front door and let himself in, "Morning Harry."
"Morning Kingsley, should we get going?" Kingsley nodded and Harry got to his feet, not wanting to spend any longer in Little Whinging than was necessary.
The two men walked up to the front gate after assuring Molly they would be perfectly safe. "When will the protection be taken off the Burrow?" Harry asked and Kingsley paused with a hand on the gate.
"As soon as iI can guarantee it's safe, once all the remaining Death Eaters are safely locked up. It seems many abandoned the fight when it became obvious they would loose. We think we've rounded them all up, but it's better to be on the safe side."
Harry nodded, "Right."
"After you." said Kingsley holding the gate open for Harry who walked through and disapparated with a pop.
They had arrived in an empty field, feeling it would be safer than risking appearing out of nowhere on a street full of the nosiest people known to wizardkind. "This way." said Harry, looking around and trying to remember where he was. It was extremely odd walking through a place he used to know so well. He had been attacked by dementors in this alley with Dudley, and there was his primary school, with the bins outside that he had once jumped over to end up on the roof. When they finally arrived on Privet Drive, Harry looked for Number 4, and found it standing looking almost exactly the same as it had the last time Harry saw it, it was slightly unnerving.
"Your Aunt and Uncle wont be impressed it took so long, but we had to rebuild it the 'muggle way', can't exactly explain how a house just reappears overnight."
Harry looked down the street almost amused at how it had remained stubbornly unchanged, when he noticed one of the neighbours watching him from their flower beds, she reminded Harry somewhat of his Aunt. They would have been around the same age and she was wearing a floral printed dress and a plain knitted cardigan, he wondered how it was possible for her to be so clean whilst gardening. "Aren't you supposed to have left?" the woman asked getting to her feet and pulling her gardening gloves off. Harry glanced over his shoulder at Kingsley, extremely grateful that he was skilled in dressing like a muggle. The woman came up to stand next to Kingsley, gazing distastefully at the plot. "They disappeared one day without a word." she said, addressing Kingsley instead of Harry. "I knew something was going on, funny lot in that house. Too normal if you know what I mean. And the wife was awfully nosy." Kingsley chuckled, "Oh?"
"Yes well, one day they just disappeared, and within a week the place was burnt to the ground. I woke up one day and looked out of my window and it was rubble. Gas leak they told us. It didn't half spoil my view, but they were an inconsiderate bunch." She seemed to be talking as though Harry wasn't there, but he didn't care. "Took us bloody months to get the council to clear it up, and then I had to put up with an endless stream of builders and scaffolding and all sorts " The woman shook her head and looked back at the house again sticking her nose up, "And now I have to mow the bloody grass too, no one else on the street was going to and it looked awful. I'd give them a piece of my mind if I saw them again, making me look bad they were. I live in a respectable street full of respectable people. At least, I do now."
"Well, we must be getting on now, thank you for your, insight. Good day." said Kingsley signalling for Harry to follow him. They waved and walked away. The woman didn't reply or return the gesture, merely crossed her arms and watched them leave, a haughty look on her face.
"Was it the Death Eaters?" Harry asked once they were around the corner,
"Definitely." replied Kingsley.
"Do they know their house was burn't down?"
"No." Kingsley replied.
"So what do we do know?"
When they were back in the field and sure they were out of sight of any passers by, Kingsley sent a patronus off into the sky.
"Were have to go and speak to them." said Kingsley.
Great. Harry though to himself.
"What the Bloody Hell do you mean my house was burnt down?!" Yelled Uncle Vernon, red in the face, a vain pulsing ferociously on the side of his head.
"Well, It was blown up by a group of Death Eaters," Harry began patronizingly "Then it fell down. Do you understand?"
"Don't you dare get smart with me Boy! You made us leave our home to spend a year stuck inside with those freaks out there," Uncle vernon gestured to the room Hestia and Dedalus were drinking tea in. They had returned to help the Dursleys move out, and looked thoroughly exhausted and slightly thinner then they had when Harry saw them last. "and now you tell me we can leave but we've got no where to go! You better have a bloody good explanation!"
"You do have somewhere to go, I told you, they rebuilt the house. That's why it's taken so long. I'm awfully sorry to inconvenience you, but you see, I was a bit busy defending both the world from an evil wizard who killed countless people. I think that at some point whilst I was busy taking part in the biggest war in wizarding history, I forgot to keep your lawn looking tidy."
Vernon huffed looking outraged. Petunia and Dudley were sitting silently in the corner, it seemed that one positive of it all was that Dudley had finally lost some weight. He was still by no means thin, but he now resembled a human more than a pig.
"You've got no idea what we've been through Boy! I had to let my assistant run my drilling business! My Assistant! That's my life work, what are you going to do about it?!"
"Nothing." said Harry, "Kingsley has offered to have people help you move back in." He badly wanted to be angry with his Uncle but he just couldn't be bothered. He would make sure they had a house and leave them to it. Frankly he found Vernon's selfishness almost comic.
"That's not the point. We deserve compensation!" Vernon sank into a chair breathing as though he had just run a marathon.
"I think Hestia and Dedalus deserve more compensation than the three of you put together. I'll go and get Kingsley and he can make arrangements with you." Harry left the room and entered the small kitchen next door. It was sparkling clean and well kept, of course, it would be with Aunt Petunia in the house. Though perhaps slightly dated with its orange lino floors and formica topped table. "Do you wan't to go speak to them Kingsley." Kingsley got to his feet and left the room patting Harry's shoulder with a small smirk as he went.
"You did it then!" squeaked Dedalus Diggle, pouring Harry a cup of tea and inviting Harry to sit with them at a table. "Kingsley was telling us all about the battle, I'm just sorry I missed it!" Harry smiled, not completely sure how to reply.
"Thank you, both of you for doing this. I'm sorry it took so long." Hestia chuckled dryly at Harry's comment.
"Yes, well it's the last time I sign up to protect anyone, no matter who they're related to. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you when you told us how hard it would be." Harry gave a wry laugh.
"Enough about all that," said Dedalus, still unnaturally happy, "Tell us what went on last year." Harry gulped down his tea, he knew he didn't have much choice but he wasn't going to go into all the details with what he had been doing, he'd tell them about what happened to the rest of the Wizarding world.
They had been talking for over and hour and a half when a slightly harassed looking Kingsley came back through, "Right. Well, everything's sorted.I can tell you officially, you are now relieved of any duty of care or protection." Dedalus got to his feet and shook Kingsley's hand enthusiastically, "Why thank you dear man."
"Let's get going Harry." They said their good byes to Dedalus and Hestia and made their way out into the hall. They passed the doorway to the living room from which the Dursleys watched them leave: Vernon glaring, Petunia and Dudley watching them with almost frightened eyes.
"God I feel sorry for Dedalus and Hestia" said Harry when the had arrived outside the Burrow.
"I think they are both just glad to be alive. Though I agree your aunt and uncle are hardly easy to get on with." Kingsley said, once again opening the gate for Harry. "I would come in but I'd better be getting back to the Ministry. Do you want to go with the aurors tomorrow, to move your Aunt and Uncle?" Harry suddenly realised he had a perfectly good excuse. "I wish I could," he began sarcastically, "But it's Christmas Eve tomorrow and Andromeda and her grandson Teddy, uh, Lupin's son are coming round" Kingsley gave a deep laughed as he turned to leave, "Wait, sorry I forgot to ask you earlier, have you heard anything more about Hermione's parents?" Harry asked quickly.
"Ah, I almost forgot, I had word from my team today that they think they may have located the Grangers and are working on undoing their memory charms at St Mungo's as we speak. Let us hope Miss Granger believes in Christmas Miracles." Kingsley said kindly, "For the record Harry, I think the three of you have coped with everything that has happened to you with amazing strength. You and Mr Weasley will make excellent Aurors. Give Molly and Arthur my best." Harry nodded and the Minister disapparated. Kingsley's calm, deep voice made it so easy to believe everything he said.
Harry walked back into the Burrow to find Ron, Hermione and Ginny all sitting round the table finishing their lunch and speaking quietly, Ron was helping himself to another sandwich and Ginny was picking at the cheese leftover on her plate. Harry collapsed into a chair feeling exhausted, "How was it?" Ginny asked, obviously they were back on speaking terms. Harry groaned in response.
"We could all go for a walk after lunch or something? I need to get out of the house" Ron suggested, he reached out to take Hermione's hand over the table, but she withdrew it quickly, "Sorry, but I'm reading a book." The three of them looked at Hermione slightly confused at her abrupt response, and she scurried away up the stairs, unable to meet their eyes.
"What on earth was that about?" Harry asked and Ron looked equally bemused.
"Has Hermione spoken to either of you about her appointment yesterday?" Ginny asked tentatively.
"No, why?" replied Ron, Ginny stared at the mug in her hands for a moment then shook her head slightly, "Nothing, maybe she just doesn't like you anymore Ron." Harry was sure she had meant it as a joke, but it had fallen flat. "Sorry, she said she'd tell you about it." Ginny said in a kinder tone.
There was silence for a moment before Ginny asked, "Has she let you do it before? Hold her hand I mean."
Ron thought about it for a second, "Yeah, I mean, we even kissed the night of the battle. But since then she's only let me hold her hand once and only for a second. It was like she realised what she was doing and pulled away. I'm sure she avoided me when you came back for Percy's wedding."
"She's definitely gone off you." Said Ginny smirking.
"It's not funny Gin, there's something wrong." Said Ron looking at his sister seriously.
"I know, I know," Said Ginny, "I care about her too. I'll talk to her tonight."
"No." said Ron getting to his feet, "I will."
Harry and Ginny watched Ron leave and looked at each other, just as Percy entered the room with his wife, Audrey. Harry had only met her once, at their wedding in September, she had seemed nice enough, Ginny reckoned she was good for Percy anyway. Audrey was tall and quite slim with mousey brown hair, she had soft features and a kind face and although she didn't dress very well, she was neat and well presented.
"Not interrupting anything are we?" Percy scoffed slightly and Audrey gave him a look as Ginny rolled her eyes. "Sorry. Uh, good to see you again Harry, Auror training not to strenuous?" Percy tried again, Harry chuckled, some things never really change.
"It's going really well thanks, but we've got to go and check on Hermione," he said, standing up and gesturing to Ginny who got to her feet rather quickly, "Nice to see you again Audrey."
"Oh Percy" Ginny laughed as they climbed up the stairs, "I wish he wasn't so pompous but then he wouldn't be Percy if he was." She sighed as they continued up the stairs towards her room, "I'm really glad the war is over, I really am. But it doesn't feel like it." Harry squeezed her hand quickly before letting go, "I know. But it'll get better, I promise."
Upstairs Ron searched his room frantically looking for his rucksack, he found it under his bed and pulled it out banging his head on the metal frame. Cursing loudly, Ron opened the bag and grabbed what he had been looking for before rushing out of the room, kicking Warwick Bowyer's book on Vigilance out of the way as he went. He hurried down the stairs and stopped outside Ginny's bedroom door. After taking a few deep breaths, Ron knocked lightly on the door. "Come in." came Hermione's voice and Ron pushed the door open tentatively.
"Oh," she looked flustered at Ron's appearance, "I'm sorry Ron, but it's N.E. year and I really need to read this book. We've missed out on a whole year of education and it simp-"
"Hermione..." Ron interrupted coming into the room and sitting on the edge of the camp bed.
"What's going on?" Hermione didn't answer, instead she looked down at the book in her hands.
"Don't you like me?" Hermione looked up shocked,
"Of course I do Ron!" her eyes searched his face, wanting to make sure he understood, "I do very, very much. It's just..." Ron watched her play with her hands as she tried to think of something to say.
"I'm a mudblood Ron, you deserve better than me." she whispered in a rush, blinking hard trying to keep the tears at bay. They cascaded down over her cheeks and Ron looked shocked, he moved to put and arm around her but she flinched away.
"Hermione, don't ever call yourself that again."
"It's true though isn't it?" As she spoke, Ron noticed one hand was gripping her left arm very tightly. He took hold of her arm gently, rolled up the sleeve revealing the white scars Bellatrix had left.
"It's not true. These scars don't mean anything. 'Blood status' doesn't mean anything Hermione, you should know that."
"I keep hearing her words. At night, its like she's here, in this room." Hermione's eyes traveled around the room lingering on any dark corners. "I know she's not but it feels like she is. And when we were fighting at the end of the battle, she was after me. She said the world would be better off without me and she was too powerful and I couldn't fight her off and if it hadn't been for Ginny or Luna and I can't let you touch me...and..." Hermione had been talking faster and faster until tears overwhelmed her.
"Hey, Hey...shhhhh" Ron let go of her arm and tried to put his arm round her again, but once again she flinched and pulled away
"She's gone now Hermione, you have to leave it behind."
"But I... I can't"
"Hermione Granger, what that woman did to you was unspeakable. But you're safe now, you're never going to be in danger again because I'm here to look after you, and so is Harry, and so is Ginny. I'm not too good for you, you're too good for me." as he spoke he looked up at Harry and Ginny who stood in the doorway and nodded solemnly on reply, Ron paused and took something out from behind him, "I have something of yours." Ron reached behind him and pulled out a woollen scarf which he wrapped around Hermione's neck to hide the thin scar. She gasped and hiccuped slightly as she looked down at it. "It's the scarf I left tied to a tree incase you came back, before we disapparated." Ron nodded. "I kept it safe."
Hermione looked at it for a moment before taking it off. "Don't you want it?" Ron asked concerned. "No, its not that." began Hermione looking down at the scarf she held in her lap, "It's just, it reminds me... can't you keep it safe for me?"
"Sure." said Ron.
Hermione let tears overcome her again as she tried to look up at Ron and the other two came into the room and sat down on the edge of the bed with her, Ginny taking one of her hands in her own.
"I'm sorry, for being such a... a crybaby." Hermione stuttered as she tried once again to compose herself.
"Don't worry about it, everyone needs a good blubber now and then." Hermione giggled and wiped her eyes.
"Here," said Ginny, pulling a handkerchief from her pocket, "magic hankie."
Author's Note: Thank you so much for reading this far! I would really appreciate some reviews so I know what you're thinking!
