She ends the session an hour earlier than usual, much to the children's joy. Kaoru vaguely registers them swarm to the bathing areas. Her mind is focused on what needs to be done before she leaves. Check that the escape routes' destination is still the coastal region of Tokugawa. Review the escape routes with Yahiko. Have Tsubame and Yahiko refresh the seals that only allow the children to reach the coastal region through the escape routes.
An unintentional whiff of something truly and horridly ghastly brings her out of those thoughts for a moment. Something has to have died or rotted somewhere around here… She tentatively sniffed again and oh Kami. It's firmly assured that a bath is at the very top of the day's to do list.
She needs to hurry if she wants to get her list done and have time to go into the city today. The bathing area consists of several water-filled basins and benches as well as a few larger soaking tubs. Of course the water runs out in the basins rather quickly, and the larger tubs need to be cleaned out regularly. They refill the water from the coastal region's river once a month. It's such a large chore that it takes all of them working together for three days to get it done.
A quick scrub and she dons her yukata before heading to Yahiko's room. The tunnels leading to the larger rooms are lit brighter than the smaller tunnels leading to them. A warm glow shines into the tunnel due to his shoji being open. Kaoru sees him staring intently into a bowl of water and so she hangs in the doorway. Out of all of the orphans, Tsubame and Yahiko have the strongest abilities.
Together they took down the spells from her father's time and fabricated the new spells. Now the escape routes had one destination, only the children could use them, and the lights changed with the outside. Their abilities did have a few differences. Tsubame could force plants to grow more quickly. Yahiko could see glimpses of the future in still bowls of water and often used the ability to fix what would have broken.
And…. he's still staring into the bowl. She shifts feet and sighs impatiently. This stuff takes far too long. "Oi, busu, you need to be quiet if you're going to hang out." His eyes never leave the bowl but his colors flicker with the beginnings of irritation. Kaoru guiltily smiles in his direction. After a few long moments he glances at her from the corner of his eye. "What do you want? I can't concentrate with you there." There's a strange lilt to his voice and, after a second of careful observation, she can see his colors are muted. Almost compressed as though he were trying not to feel. What on earth?
"I need to check the escape routes with you and have the two of you refresh the seals before I go into the city." Yahiko completely turns his head to stare at her with an odd expression on his face. Outrageously surprised with a dash of confusion and a tinge of horror. If she were to do something that deserved that reaction, then the closest would be if she had announced her intentions to never touch a bokken again and then proceed to run into the city naked. He stares at her for a bit more before carefully and slowly speaking to her.
"Kaoru… didn't we have this talk yesterday? Tsubame and I did that this morning before I woke you up." She can feel her smile twitch on her face and her eye feels as though it will mysteriously begin twitching as well any moment now. That little brat. She bites her tongue to hold back a irritated remark. Yahiko has a habit of mixing up what's already happened because of how real his visions seem. Instead of taking responsibility for his errors, he prefers to play it up to make others to feel as though they've lost their mind.
Yahiko focuses his brown eyes on her face and at that precise moment his colors brighten a touch in smug amusement. Probably due to her reaction to his drama. A sly grin spread across his face. "Oh that's right, I saw you asking yesterday. Yes it's done. You can go." He stares back into his bowl, but it barely registers to Kaoru. When he turned to face her, she had been disturbed. Kaoru had only heard the usual taunts and seen the usual surface colors this morning. Grief and despair are being compressed in his soul. His shoulders are slumped and bags with the beginnings of what are destined to be monstrous in size are under his eyes.
She doesn't move to leave and he glances at her from the corner of his eye. It's barely a moment before he speaks again in a rough voice. "Actually... Kaoru, I saw the lights go red. You made me leave with the children, and stood alone against the people that came. Then you stood in a rain of blood before falling." His fingers run along the side of the bowl. He looks at her with a blank expression, but all she can see are the bags under his eyes and colors of grief and despair. How could she have missed this?
"I keep looking but I can't see anything else." The tunnel lights turn red for invasion. So he's worried about the tunnels being found and mourning her death. She's not dead and he's already grieving her loss. "You're going to die Kaoru." Yahiko is staring at her as though this is the last time he'll see her and she's feeling numb with the shock. How did she not see this? Her mouth runs by itself. "You and the children made it out safely?"
He knocks over the bowl when he stands. The bottoms of his hakama are dark and dripping with water. "That's what you're focusing on? You're dead. You die." She watches him as he balls his fists and screams at her. "You abandoned us." It's the way his hands are trembling and the colors that scream betrayal that forces her frozen body to cross the room and her arms to wrap around him. For a long moment he stands stiff. She almost releases him before he hugs her desperately. There's an agonizing feeling of her heart being twisted.
Yahiko doesn't sob or even make a noise. He releases her the moment his trembling subsides and refuses to look at her. She takes that as her cue to leave. He probably needs some alone time to get his thoughts back in order. His whisper stops her in the doorway. "You still die Kaoru." Kaoru replies without looking back. She doesn't want to see what colors he has in reply. "Everyone dies eventually and that's not what matters. It's how you affect others and what you do with the time you have." A heavy pause and her lips curl with a wry smile. "Don't say anything to the others. It'll only make it hurt worse if it happens."
"If? When have I ever been wrong?" She still refuses to turn around to see his colors. Doesn't want to see if she's giving him hope. Especially if it turns out to be a false hope. "You only saw me standing in a rain of blood before falling right? That's not someone dying." Kaoru stares blankly into the darker tunnels. She doesn't want to but she can feel his hope without looking. There's a buzzing in her ears as she walks back to her room and dresses in the kimono. Slowly, she twists her hair up into an acceptable hairstyle for a woman traveling alone in the city.
The thought of dying doesn't scare her. Somehow that is what makes everything worse. Because she knows what she is supposed to feel and it is not calm acceptance.
