I never really hated him for his father. I couldn't hold a grudge against the dead, not really. After all, in the end, they were dead and no longer here and so dwelling on them would be futile.
The reason I hated him was different. I hated him for everything he embodied. Every time I looked at him it hurt, to see those eyes looking so accusingly at me, to watch him e so selfless, so noble, so dedicated to protecting the weak, to campaigning for justice and what is right, it hurt. And so I hated him for the pain he caused me.
Others looked at him and said he was just like James, calling him Prongslet, James' child, Potter. I hated him, but I couldn't admit why, so I passed it off as him being his father's son. After all, Severus Snape's rivalry with the marauders, especially Potter, was legendary. No-one would be surprised if I hated Potter's son.
I saw him for what he really was though. He was Lily's child through and through. It wasn't just those accusing eyes, or the way he felt a need to stand up for what he thought was right. It was the way he gave everyone a chance, and never complained, and was completely free of prejudice. It was his fiery temper and stubbornness, his capability to sacrifice absolutely everything for the cause he believed in. He was nothing like James, not really, and so that wasn't why I hated him, not really.
If someone were to ask me what I regret most I can answer in a heartbeat, without hesitation, and it's not joining Voldemort, nor is it telling him the prophecy, no what I regret is far simpler, yet far worse.
"You're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus"
"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!"
Lily blinked.
"Fine," she said coolly. "I won't bother in future. And I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus."
Merlin I'd give anything to be able to go back and stop myself saying that word. I've never said that word again, not even when with the Death Eaters, but, of course, it is too late now.
Every time I look at him I see Potter's child, and I think, he could have been mine. And that hurts. That hurts so much.
