Author's note - Hey everyone! I have at last updated and sorry it's not long, but as I said before this is going to a relatively short fic. Oh, and a big thanks to everyone who reviewed: 1angelette, Jean Cooper, The Scarlet Sky, Flaming Black Skull and Awesome Rapidash. You guys are amazing!
Telling Jack
Mary was quietly thoughtful as they made their way to the farm and as he observed it, Gray realised how he'd always admired that quality in her. Why now, he thought, why only now when he'd couldn't act upon them should his feelings rise to the surface, with the only purpose of prolonging his pain?
It didn't seem fair. Not at all. But then nothing did since Mary had married Jack.
As they walked along, the Fall sunshine getting seemingly brighter with each step, Gray felt himself falling into a wonderful fantasy. He found that if he concentrated hard enough, he could push all the negative feelings about the Mary and Jack situation to the back of his mind until they paled into complete insignificance. Jack was out of the picture entirely, non-existent in fact. Mary was his wife, carrying his child and they were on the way to tell a loved one the good news. Just as they passed by the Blacksmiths Gray imagined his grandfather's reaction to his current ridiculous train of thought and very nearly laughed; love was obviously causing him insanity.
The longer the silence wore on, the deeper Gray fell into his fantasy. He knew that if it wasn't broken he could carry on pretending...
"I'm sorry for giving you such a scare earlier," Mary said slowly, just then.
Gray felt himself crashing back to earth and the reality it brought with it. "Nah, you didn't, it's okay," he lied hurriedly. Then, only seconds later, his casual words replayed in his head and he realised how they must have sounded. "I mean...not that I didn't care that you were ill. I did. Of course, I did. But - but only as a friend - "
Thankfully Mary had the sense to interrupt. "It's okay," she smiled understandingly and suddenly Gray wasn't so nervous anymore. It was strange to realise, but even though he knew she couldn't possibly understand the full extent of his problem, her calm tone went some way to comforting him.
In Gray's opinion, Mary's new home of Mineral Farm loomed before them far too soon. The prospect of seeing Jack made his heart sink to the floor, but somehow his feet were carrying him along the narrow dirt track, seemingly without his consent.
And then she grabbed his hand. Mary, that is. His hand. Mary. His hand. Oh...Goddess.
Gray froze where he stood. He blinked down at her hand clasped there and as Mary's own eyes followed, she wrenched her hand away. After mumbling a barely coherent, 'Sorry', she continued down path.
"What d'you do that for?" Gray snapped, in utter frustration, after a moment's shocked silence.
He wasn't fully expecting an answer, yet Mary still turned. "I'm sorry," she repeated in a quiet, mousy tone. "I - was nervous, that's all. S - sorry."
It was one of those moments where you know you should probably just leave it go and keep silent. But Gray couldn't - not even when Mary's grey eyes were on the verge of tears and she looked genuinely confused. He found he didn't much care anymore.
"Well - just don't, okay?" he answered shortly, walking on. It was such a sunny day, he noted dully as Mary scurried behind, though it felt more like it should be raining. Completely tipping down, in fact.
By the time they'd reached the farmhouse, Gray's anger had abated - slightly - though Mary was still silent. "Thank you," she said hurriedly, barely even looking at him. She was obviously embarrassed about earlier and...nervous? Wasn't that what she'd said? He hadn't been paying too much attention really. Guilt welled up inside Gray as he watched Mary and he bit down on his bottom lip. After the way he'd snapped, he wasn't really sure if it was his place to ask why...
"You can go now if you want," she told him suddenly, cutting through his thoughts. "I'll be fine now. And thank you, of course, for everything." She paused for a second, her eyes lingering on Gray's hand. "I hope your hand's okay, by the way."
It took Gray a little while to understand what she meant, as his injured hand had completely slipped his mind. In fact, it was odd to think that one simple mistake in the Blacksmiths had led to all this. He gave her a small smile, that was hopefully as apologetic as it was reassuring. "I'm sure I'll be fine," he replied.
And to his delight, Mary smiled back, wider and brighter than he could ever have dreamed for. It seemed the damage had been repaired.
But then she opened her mouth...and he realised. It was Jack she was smiling at, Jack whose name she called out, Jack who clapped him on the back before moving on to his waiting wife...
Jack.
Damn.
Gray couldn't exactly say it felt as though his heart had sunk this time; it felt more like there was nothing to sink. He was just empty. A shell.
As if watching Jack wander over to Mary and envelope her in hug, looking concerned at her sudden arrival wasn't bad enough, Gray found himself being invited in to share the good news. What's more, he actually heard himself agreeing to the ludicrous proposal and was trudging across the damp, sun drenched lawn before he could stop himself.
However, despite his anxiety and fear, Gray could barely stifle a gasp as he entered the farmhouse. He'd never seen the inside of it before, despite the odd offer from Mary, but now he could understand more clearly than ever why she was so proud of her new home. It was just so, so her - there was no other word for it, really.
A large, rough-wood dining table sat almost central in the room, surrounded my many chairs, most of them rarely used, by the seems of it. There were old, but cosy looking armchairs set over by a huge fireplace in the corner and the kitchen was flooded with light from a small, circular window placed at the end of it. Most noticeable to Gray, though, were all the books. They were everywhere; stacked on coffee tables, the arms of chairs, some even piled up in corners of the floor...No wonder Mary felt so at home.
"It's wonderful, isn't?" she sighed, presently, watching Gray's expression with care. "Old-fashioned and homey; just perfect."
That was exactly what he was afraid of: her being completely content here. It wasn't a pleasant thought, and not one Gray was particularly proud of, but he just couldn't see himself ever being happy for Mary and Jack. There would only be bitterness and that, he thought, was very sad.
His mind still racing with thoughts, Gray hardly noticed Mary offering him a seat at the table.
"Gray?" she repeated, concerned, and he almost leapt into the chair opposite her to compensate. Jack had gone off into the kitchen to fetch snacks, leaving the two alone, and Gray surprised himself by finding he had very little to say.
"You've...er...told him, then?" he asked, for want of anything better. After all, she must have done during that hug or at some point when he was stood feeling so lost. And Jack was just taking the news very well, that was all.
His pathetic attempts to convince himself that he wouldn't have to bear this ordeal, soon crumbled when Mary shook her head. "Not quite yet," she answered slowly focusing more on the table before her, rather than Gray.
He shifted uncomfortably at the revelation. "Oh...am I really required for this, then?" he blurted out. By now, Gray didn't really care how rude he sounded, he simply wanted to leave. In fact, he would have made a dash for the door right now, if that had not involved pushing the boundries of acceptable social conduct a little too far.
"Well, I was hoping you'd stay, Gray," Mary mumbled, still not looking at him. She shrugged. "Of course, if you don't want to..."
"It's not like that - "
"Good then!" she smiled as though that settled it. "I'm sure Jack will love to have you here to share the news. You two would be such good friends if you just got to know each other a little better."
Somehow Gray doubted it. After all, the desire to rip someone apart and kick them into the next decade was hardly a virtue of friendship.
Nevertheless, he smiled and nodded.
Just then, Jack came out of the kitchen struggling to balance three glasses of apple juice, and only just managing. He was followed by a large, pale brown dog, whose name Gray was unsure of. Something with 'D' was about as much as he knew. Danny, perhaps? Or Digger?
"Oh, hello Dexter," Mary cooed, ruffling the mutt's long, droopy ears so that it barked loudly. Oh, he thought, well...close enough.
Soon, all three were seated, each with their juice, and Gray was beginning think that if Mary didn't get on with it and tell him now, she never would. As she started going on about the weather instead, Gray earned a confused look from Jack and decided that enough was enough.
"Mary?" he coughed awkwardly, givivng her a significant look. Just why, after being ecsatic in the Clinic, she'd become so wary over being a parent, Gray couldn't say. But he did know that this situation was getting desperately uncomfortable and he wanted it over - soon.
The librarian gave a tiny nod of recognition and as her husband's eyes travelled back to her, she took a deep breath. It all came out in a rush - a strangely coherent one: "I'm pregnant, Jack."
There would have been perfect, unbroken silence in the room then, if it weren't for Dexter's scratching. The farmer and his wife continued to stare at each other, while Gray steadily watched the swirling, amber liquid in his glass as though fascinated by it. Several times he felt he should just get up and leave, but somehow he couldn't.
When Gray did at last glance upwards, he felt a shock go through him as Jack's brown eyes flew to meet his. Clearly the farmer couldn't quite figure out the blacksmith's part in the story and it was honestly quite understandable. Thankfully, Mary explained.
She told of Gray's injured hand, how she'd helped him to the Clinic, her unexpected collapse and Gray accompanying her back after the diagnosis. Finally, it all seemed to click with Jack.
There was another moment of silence, but this time it lasted only a second. Jack leapt to his feet suddenly, laughing. Laughing happily, thank Goddess. He swept his now beaming wife into his arms and hugged her as though he never wanted to let go again. "I'm gonna be a Dad!" Gray heard him mumble into her shoulder.
Their happiness seemed radiate throughout the entire room, invading every space and reverberating off the oak walls. Gray could almost feel happy for them - but then he heard her laugh.
It was the sort of cherished sound he could only dream of drawing out of her and just hearing it was the final straw. Seeing that his presence was no longer needed, Gray stumbled to his feet and after a brief 'Congratulations' he was outside.
The cold air was actually a relief as it hit him. He began walking away quickly, but stopped as the weather's dramatic change from how it had been earlier dawned. As he observed the ominous dark clouds hanging above, he smirked in grim satisfaction.
Now it really was raining.
A/N - Sorry, sorry, sorry for how long it took me to update this! I had the chapter planned for ages, just couldn't find time to write it. As always, reviews are greatly valued and appreciated, so if you have time I'd love to know your thoughts on this latest installment.
Bye for now!
