Girls Starry Night

Gail sighed as the elevator finally stopped and she could get out. Oliver was on this floor somewhere. She stared down the long corridor and hoped her uniform would be enough to get her into his room for a quick visit. She just wanted to see for herself that he was really going to be okay.

She'd been there to get him out, following into the building just behind the ETF with Chris at her side, both of them with their guns at the ready because they knew they were likely walking into a trap. But they went anyway.

She'd risk her life for Oliver Shaw, hoped her determination to get him back safely would be the same if it had been any other officer. But in truth, Oliver was special to Gail, she respected him and admired what he had achieved as a patrol officer at 15, but he also treated her like a daughter at times. Just little things, comments he'd make, advice he'd give while pretending it had nothing at all to do with Gail's situation. He was reliable and dependable and someone Gail really looked up to.

And he was funny. He could cheer her up with one of his dumb jokes and make her smile no matter how bad her mood was.

She also admired him more than either of her own parents who both had achieved so much more by Oliver's years in the police force. But that was ambition, a need to climb the ladder, earn more, be seen as more, and have the stature afforded to 'white shirts'.

Oliver was so much more than that, he was a cop's cop, the first to respond when called upon, the one who understood the streets because he had watched the criminals grow up and knew which crew was looking to take over which area of the city. He knew Toronto beyond what he needed for patrolling the districts covered by 15 Division, because it let him do his job better. He didn't need the fancy updated squad cars 15 were always being promised, no, all Oliver needed was his uniform, an early morning coffee and doughnut to start his day right, and the knowledge that his partner would have his back for their shift together.

And today it had been Gail's responsibility to have Oliver's back.

Gail clenched her jaw together as she paused her steps. She'd been doing the paperwork for the callout to Danielle's when Frank had order anyone that could to go out and patrol so that their numbers were high on the ground as they hunted down Ford. She stood when Oliver had, planning to finish her file on Danielle's case later but Oliver had waved her off, telling her he'd swing by and pick her up once she was done. He'd always hated paperwork and as she sat back down at her desk she'd made some lame joke about it being the only reason he partnered with her and he'd laughed as he walked away from her.

It had made her smile at the time.

The thought that today could have turned out so different made Gail suck in a breath. She could have lost Oliver today and instead of being able to visit with him she might have been planning to attend his funeral.

And Sam wasn't out of the woods by any stretch of the imagination yet. So there might still be that funeral to attend.

Gail felt her legs begin to shake and quickly collapsed into a nearby chair. She rested her elbows at her knees and stared down at the linoleum floor with a tired sigh, then she leaned back against the chair and rubbed at her eyes, she was exhausted.

And if she was honest, she was scared.

There was only so much space in her head right now and her own memories of her kidnapping kept surfacing every time she thought about Oliver. They made her want to get out of the hospital as quickly as she could just to try and drive them back into the place she'd found to store them after many months of nightmares and flashbacks.

But of course she couldn't do that, she had to be here, for Oliver and for Sam.

Gail shifted in her seat as her hand went to her cell phone. She pulled it from her vest and fiddled with it for a long moment before pressing a few commands and placing it up to her ear as it started to ring at the other end.

No answer.

Gail frowned and glanced down at the name on her screen. Nerd.

She tried again. And this time it rang until it clicked over to the messaging service. She sighed and hung up.

She looked around and spotted a few nurses down at a station that could probably direct her to Oliver if she asked nicely enough, but what she wanted more than anything right now was to hear Holly's voice, and to hear that her reaction earlier at the station hadn't ruined anything between them.

Gail swallowed hard as she felt tears build so she closed her eyes and tried one more time to get through to her girlfriend. But it rang out. She blew out a disappointed breath, praying to anyone that would listen that Holly was just busy with her job or asleep and wasn't deliberately ignoring her calls.

"Hey listen, Holly I know I screwed up at the station, and I'm sorry." She took another breath and tried to steady her voice. "Look, I'm at the hospital, it's not anything about me, I'm fine, really. But Oliver got hurt and Sam…Sam might not make it Holly." That was such a hard thing to say out loud. She'd seen the looks downstairs when Frank had arrived and asked about Sam's condition, she'd also seen how devastated Andy was, and she'd been beside Sam in the ambulance the whole way here.

It really wasn't looking good.

"I'd really like it if you could be here Holly. For me. Please." And then Gail had to disconnect before she was too emotional to make any sense. Please come Holly.

"I'm sorry but you can't use that on this floor." A nurse said softly to Gail, causing the blonde to almost drop the device.

Gail cleared her throat and stood, tucking her cell phone away as she eyed the nurse. "I'm actually looking for Oliver Shaw's room?" She asked hopefully.

The nurse studied her closely and Gail hoped her teary eyes were going to work in her favour.

The nurse glanced around then point to a door further down. "Room 522, but if he's sleeping don't disturb him and you can't stay for long Officer, it's well after visiting." The woman said before turning around and leaving Gail alone.

Gail took a few breaths then started forward, slowly approaching the room and wiping at her face to keep from appearing too emotional, Oliver had no idea about Sam being shot and she wasn't going to be the one to tell him while he was hurt himself.

As she got to the door she looked in the side window and spotted Celery by the bed Oliver was curled up on. She knocked lightly then walked in, giving the older woman her best attempt at a smile as she noted Oliver was fast asleep.

"Hey, I just wanted to see how he was doing." She whispered to her partner's girlfriend.

Celery offered Gail a welcoming smile before her eyes went to Oliver who moaned and shifted in place. "He's doing fine, nothing permanent just a concussion and a few abrasions." She told Gail quietly as she adjusted the blanket over her boyfriend.

Gail stepped up to the bed next to Celery's chair. Oliver had been very lucky. Ford could have so easily just killed him, he'd had plenty of time and opportunity but instead he had used her friend to lure most of the police officers out of 15 so he could go hunting for those on his list.

"They've already said that he should be able to go home tomorrow." Celery continued sounding pleased at the prospect.

"That's good." Gail replied.

Celery nodded. "How are things?" She asked, glancing at the blonde in concern. She'd been in the station when Ford had attacked and knew Sam had been shot.

Gail looked at Oliver and made sure he was still sleeping before saying, "We're not sure yet."

Celery sighed and closed her eyes for a moment as Gail looked on. Then she opened her eyes and smiled at the blonde. "It'll all work out, you'll see." She told her confidently.

Gail clenched her jaw, not able to believe that just yet. Her finger reached out and touched the white cotton of the bed sheet. She sighed. It wouldn't hurt to try and think positively for once. She gave Celery a small smile and a nod of her head in agreement. "Let's hope so."

Suddenly Gail felt Celery's hand on her wrist. She looked down at the fingers wrapped tightly around her arm then glanced curiously at Celery, one of her eyebrows hiking up in question.

"You'll see." Celery repeated with a blossoming smile that unnerved Gail slightly.

"Okay." Gail replied with smile of her own and was relieved when the woman let her go. She didn't quite understand the whole 'witch' thing Celery had going on but if she said everything was going to work out then Gail didn't see the harm in agreeing with her.

Even if it was just to get her out of the room safely.

"I'm going to head back down," Gail glanced at her watch, she hadn't been gone for long so it was unlikely that there was any news to be had, but still, it was where everyone was starting to gather. "And wait I guess, can I get you anything before I go?" She added at the last second. She hadn't spent much time really with the older woman but she knew she meant a lot to Oliver, and it was good to see him happy again.

"I'll be just fine here." Celery said before glancing back to Oliver and then picking up the book Gail hadn't noticed until now and began reading again.

Gail took that as her cue to leave. She left the room as quietly as she could and sent a smile to a nurse that glanced her way before heading back down the corridor to the elevator.

It was nearly midnight and she wondered briefly if Holly was already at home or if she was still in the lab working. Her girlfriend did that sometimes, saying she often got more work done after hours because there was no one around distracting her all of the time.

As she pressed the button for the ground floor Gail pulled out her cell phone again, trying to swallow down the disappointment she felt when she saw that she hadn't received any response from Holly.

Tears filled her eyes at the thought of the pathologist going to bed angry with her, or worse upset by her reaction at the station. She hadn't meant to panic, but Steve had been right behind her and she hadn't been ready to have that conversation with him yet. Because he'd want her to tell their parents, and there was no way she was ever going to be ready for that.

But now, Gail promised herself that if Holly would give her a second chance she'd even take her along to the next dinner her mother demanded she attend.

The elevator dinged and she took another deep breath and wiped her face of tears even though she knew anyone that looked would be able to tell she had been crying, but at this point she was beyond caring.

As she stepped out of the elevator she took a left and then followed the signs back to the reception area. As she walked into the space filling with Toronto police Gail spotted Chris standing off to the side and made her way over to him.

"Any news?" She asked but he was already shaking his head.

"No." He told her before looking around them. Everyone was just waiting. It was all they could do. And right now no news was good news, it meant Sam still had a chance. "I went up and saw Dov, he feels awful about Sam and thought he should come down but I told him just to stay up there. Chloe needs him."

Yeah. Of course Chloe also had her husband waiting for her. He got to wait by her bedside while Dov was being forced to wait it out in the corridor.

But all of that didn't really matter did it. Dov was where he needed to be.

"Yeah, not like he would be doing anything but sit around with us anyway." She said.

"Hey, there's your brother." Chris said point over at the detective from guns and gangs.

"Let's go see if he knows anything more." Maybe Frank had heard something, and maybe he'd tell Steve before he'd tell anyone else. Sam had been one of her brother's TO's when he'd first joined 15 so maybe that would count for something with Frank.

Together Chris and Gail walked over and joined her brother.

"You hear anything?" Gail asked.

Steve stuck his hands in the pockets of his trousers and rocked on his heels. He gave his younger sister a shrug. "I talked to one of the nurses, she'd only tell me he was still in surgery."

"That's good though, right?" Chris asked as he stared from one Peck to the other.

Gail sighed. "Or it's bad." They were either fixing a lot of damage caused by the bullet or they were doing everything they could to keep him holding on.

"Maybe." Steve replied with a touch of sadness. No one wanted to believe it but as he glanced over Andy, who was shedding tear after tear as she refused to even look at anyone, he couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe, they should start to prepare for the worst.

"Gail." Chris said and when his friend look at him he gestured behind the blonde with a head movement.

Gail spun around and her eyes fell on Holly who was coming towards them at a slow jog.

"Hey, I came as soon as I heard." She muttered as she stopped in front of Gail. Any worry she had over her arrival disappeared as the blonde launched herself into Holly's arms.

"I'm so glad that you're here." Gail whispered and felt the pathologist tighten her hold. Eventually Gail eased back, as much as she wanted to stay in Holly's arms, she was painfully aware that her brother was eyeing them curiously.

She smiled at Holly and took hold of her hand, lacing their fingers together.

"Steve this is Holly." She told her brother. He nodded and sent her a smirk. She guessed that Traci may have filled him in but she didn't let that stop her. "My girlfriend." She added as her brother's smile reached his eyes. But that didn't prevent her from biting her bottom lip as she tensed for his reaction.

Steve grinned at the pair taking note of their joined hands. "Hi, how's it going?"

Holly grinned at the detective before glancing at Gail again finding it hard to believe her girlfriend had just outed herself to her brother, something Holly knew the blonde had not been planning for yet.

But Gail just smiled at her. Holly squeezed Gail's hand, as happy as she was to be right here with Gail at the end of a terribly tense and stress filled day, the fact Gail had tears in her eyes brought back to Holly that things were still a long way from being over.

Gail sighed and shifted closer to Holly, her free hand going to the inside of Holly's arm and stroking it gently.

Holly wanted to get Gail alone so she smiled an acknowledgment at Chris before tugging at Gail's hand. "Let's go find a seat."

Gail nodded and let Holly drag her over to a less populated area. She could finally breathe easier now that Holly was here with her. And even better, she didn't seem mad at her.

Holly sat down and pulled Gail down into the seat beside her without letting go of her hand.

Holly brought Gail's hand up to her lips, pressing a quick kiss to the back of the blonde's hand before resting their joined hands in her own lap. "I wasn't…really expecting you to do that." She told Gail with a touch of wonder in her voice.

Gail shrugged. She hadn't completely processed what she had done and what it would mean for her or for them, but she didn't really think it mattered at this moment in time. Not with Sam's life hanging in the balance. If something was going to adjust where her priorities should lie it was that.

Every officer and detective in Toronto risked their lives every time they went out on patrol or to a crime scene. You always had to remember that anyone could be carrying a weapon and might mean you harm or other people.

And today it was Sam, and Chloe, and Oliver.

And tomorrow it could be… anyone. It could be Chris or Steve or even Gail herself.

A tear rolled down her cheek and Gail was quick to wipe it away with a nervous chuckle.

Holly licked her lips wanting nothing more than to pull Gail back into her arms and not let go until this was all over. "You got him though, didn't you? You got Oliver back?"

Gail nodded quickly. "Yeah we did, he's upstairs, possible concussion but Celery said they'll be releasing him tomorrow."

"That's great news."

"Yeah." Gail replied, wishing it was all good news. "Chloe's the same though, and Sam… he's still in surgery."

Holly had heard about Sam.

"What do you need Gail?" Holly wasn't sure what to do other than sit with Gail and hold her hand while they waited with everyone else.

Gail swallowed and glanced over at Andy who still had her head in her hands. She needed for her friend to not have to go through what Traci had gone through.

No one should lose the person they loved like this, especially before they had the time to make a life together.

It was just so unfair.

Her throat tightened as she realised that she was incredibly lucky to have ever found Holly. And even if she never spoke to her parents again she would still be the best thing in Gail's life.

"I just need you." She choked out as she felt her tears return.

"Hey, hey." Holly shifted closer to Gail, allowing their shoulders to touch. "You have me Gail, you already have me." She promised the blonde. "I'm right here sweetheart, I'm not going anywhere."

Gail let out a shaky breath. "I'm so scared we're going to lose someone else and it's just not fair Holly."

"I know, but they're all in the best place for them right now and everything that can be done for your friends is being done, I'm certain of it." Holly explained, trying to give the blonde some hope that it wasn't necessarily going to be bad news that they were waiting for.

"Maybe." The truth was that until a doctor came out and spoke to them there was just no way of knowing.

"Listen, why don't I go talk to the nurses and see if I can find out who's working on Sam. We might get lucky and I'll know them." Holly said as she got to her feet.

Gail blinked and watched her girlfriend head over to the reception desk. Was that even possible?

But it didn't take long for Holly to return and take back her place beside Gail, quickly reaching for the blonde's hand again.

"Sorry, no luck." She explained in disappointment. She did know two of the trauma doctors that worked here but neither were working today so her contacts were of no use. She was frustrated that she couldn't do anything to make things easier for any of the officers around her, especially because she wanted to ease Gail's worry but it looked like all they could do was wait.

Minutes went by but it felt like hours. Just when Holly was going to suggest getting them coffee they both heard Frank's voice and glanced over to see him heading for a doctor. They both stood and got closer just like everyone else in the waiting area.

"Can we see him, Doc please?" Frank implored, needing something more than to be told they were doing everything that they could for Sam.

Gail saw Andy and Nick shift closer. Andy's eyes looked red raw and Gail felt her stomach clench.

"Fine, one person, just one." The doctor finally agreed.

"Right here!" Nick spoke up pushing Andy closer to the doctor and Frank.

Andy looked reluctant but after another gentle push she went and the doctor spoke to her quietly before taking her away behind a set of doors.

Gail watched Nick's shoulders sag as Andy disappeared and then he walked back to his seat where he collapsed and tilted his head up to eye the ceiling.

Gail wasn't sure what she felt watching him but she knew Andy was still in love with Sam so no matter what happened things would never be the same with Andy and Nick after this.

Then a tug came at her hand causing her to glance at Holly. Holly gestured to the side as Gail gave her a questioning look. Steve and Traci were stood beside them and Gail had to wonder when that had happened.

"Hey." Steve said trying to smile but like everyone else, he couldn't quite manage it, there really wasn't much to be smiling about right now anyway. Other than that they knew one Ford brother was dead and the other was in custody.

Traci didn't bother with any small talk and simply reached for Holly and pulled her into a hug before doing the same to Gail.

"How are you holding up?" Traci asked looking at Gail with a touch of apprehension in her gaze as she rubbed at her arm soothingly. She knew Gail didn't like being around hospitals and today had already been stressful enough with the blonde having been shot at herself.

Gail shrugged not sure how to feel about having Traci of all people try and offer her comfort when the blonde knew her friend had to be dealing with her own issues with being in this waiting area again. "I'm okay."

Holly took hold of Gail's hand once more. "Maybe we should all sit down?" She asked.

They all took seats a little out of the way but close enough to see when Andy returned.

Chris wandered over to them, smiling at them all before looking at Gail. "I'm going to head back up to Dov and see if he needs anything." He told her.

Gail nodded it was probably better than waiting out here with every else. At least he might be able to do something for Dov unlike the rest of them. "Sure, okay." She replied.

"Will you text me if…"

"Of course." Holly answered for Gail and then Chris turned and left to go back up to the floor Chloe was on.

Steve looked up from where he had been fiddling with his cell. "Marlo's been suspended." He informed them quietly.

Gail snorted. Wasn't that a given?

Traci looked concerned. "Do you think she'll come here?" She wondered, she wasn't sure having Andy and Marlo in the same confined space was a good thing.

Gail scowled. "Why wouldn't she want to be with her boyfriend?" She asked giving Traci a look. Just because Sam and Andy had history and were trying to kid themselves that they didn't love each other didn't mean it was okay to act like Marlo wasn't going to be welcomed.

Traci looked abashed. "I just meant…" She wasn't too sure what she did mean.

"Gail." Steve said trying to calm his sister down.

"What?" Gail asked her brother with a frown.

Steve sighed knowing his sister was looking for someone to lash out at. "Nothing." He said not wanting to give her any more reason to blow up at him or Traci.

"No, not nothing, are you trying to say Marlo isn't allowed to come check on her own boyfriend?" She demanded to know as she ignored Holly squeezing her hand.

Steve sighed and gave his sister a jerk of his shoulders. "There's three officers in this hospital because of her actions Gail, try and remember that." He told his sister.

"She made a mistake."

"And a good man might die because of it." Steve replied with a frown of his own. He might not be close friends with Swarek but he was a colleague.

Gail sucked in a sharp breath when all she could see was a kitchen and a body on the floor, and a growing pool of blood.

As tears started to build Gail had to get away for a moment to try and compose herself. She let go of Holly's hand and stood, hoping her mumbled excuse that she needed to use the restroom would keep Holly in her seat so she didn't break down in front of her girlfriend.

Steve watched his sister go then felt a smack on his arm.

"I can't believe you just said that to her!" Traci hissed at him completely taken aback by Steve's insensitivity to his own sister. She knew Gail's mind had went to Jerry at Steve's words because that's the memories they had stirred up with her.

Only she had never seen how bad it had been, she had only visited Jerry afterwards, after the nursing staff had cleaned him up. She often wondered what images Gail and Sam and Andy lived with knowing they had been the last of her friends to see him alive.

Holly ignored the pair as they started to bicker in low tones, her eyes trained in the direction Gail had gone in as she wondered how long to leave the blonde before going to make sure she was okay.

With a tired sigh and a look around the room Holly got up and said she was going for a coffee. She didn't wait for a response from either of the pair across from her before taking off. And she didn't go further into the hospital where she knew a range of vending machines were located, instead she found the side doors and stepped out of the hospital into the cold night air of Toronto in early March.

Holly walked, she didn't care where she went she just needed a moment alone and a few minutes out of the way before she embarrassed herself yet again today and chased after Gail.

She tried to ignore the feeling in her gut telling her to go after the blonde because she knew Gail liked her space and hated being pushed into a corner.

"Dammit." She cursed and spun on her heel, quickening her steps as she headed back in through the side doors and walked straight in the direction Gail had gone paying no attention to the officers she passed as she saw the restroom sign up ahead.

She slowed her steps, second guessing herself once more because while Gail had apologised in her message, her girlfriend's reaction to her back at the station was still raw. Holly wasn't used to having to pretend her girlfriend was just a friend.

Holly didn't ever want to go back to that.

But she still had to be sensitive to Gail's needs, the blonde was clearly having memories of her abduction and Jerry's death brought back up just by being in the hospital and that had been before Steve's comments.

Holly paused just outside the door and glanced around, happy that the corridor was empty and if Gail did blow up at her at least it would hopefully be in private.

She took a deep breath and eased the door to the room open. "Gail?" She said, wanting to give her girlfriend as much warning of her presence as possible. As she stepped forward as was confronted by Gail cornered by the sinks by none other than Andy McNally.

Who was shouting at her girlfriend.

"What the hell?" She asked moving towards the pair and pulling Andy away by the arm and guarding Gail from the other woman by stepping in front of the blonde and forcing Andy back. "What do you think you are doing?!" She asked, incredulous at the scene she had walked in on.

Andy wiped her arm across her tear stained face. "And you are?" Andy asked before snorting, "Oh, that's right, you're the real friend, right?" Andy said, remembering the woman from the hospital that time Gail had hurt her wrist and had someone pick her up.

"She's my girlfriend." Gail spoke up quietly from her place against the wall. She was so tired right now, tired and weary.

At Andy's stunned look, Holly turned and focused on Gail. She moved closer and took one of her hands as the other came up to wipe the tears from Gail's face.

"Hey, you okay?" She asked softly. The obvious answer was no, of course Gail wasn't okay, you don't cry for no reason. But it made Gail chuckle and squeeze her hand so Holly thought it did its job.

"Oh, yeah, everything's just great babe, Andy and I were just discussing who had more right to be in here crying, me who can't stop thinking that this is Jerry all over again, or McNally here, who has a boyfriend out in the waiting area while she's in here crying over the love of her life lying injured on the operating table back there." Gail said.

"She's your… girlfriend?" Andy asked in a daze.

Gail rolled her eyes and sniffed and wiped her eyes again as Holly reached over to the handtowels and handed the blonde a few. "Thanks." Gail muttered before blowing her nose.

Holly wanted to pull Gail into her arms but with Andy in the room with them she had to settle for rubbing the blonde's arm as Gail rested back against the wall with her head tilted up and her eyes closed.

Her girlfriend looked drained and Holly was worried about her. She glanced over her shoulder at the other woman, she knew from Gail and Traci that Andy was with Nick and had been with Sam before that. But any sympathy she might have felt evaporated the moment she walked in here and saw the brunette cornering Gail like what happened today was somehow down to Gail.

She turned back to her girlfriend. "What do you say we get out of here?" She asked, meaning more than the restroom, she wanted to get Gail out of the hospital and away from all the reminders. "I'm sure Chris or Traci can let us know if there are any changes." She tried as she gently tugged at Gail's arm in the hopes of getting her moving.

Gail bit her lip as the tears just seemed to keep coming. She sighed and dropped her head down from the wall. Holly looked so concerned for her it made her smile. She wasn't used to that, having someone care so much that you could see it in their eyes clear as day.

It was a nice feeling. Even after everything about today, even after pushing Holly away, the pathologist still came running the moment she found out Gail needed her.

"I want to go home." She told her girlfriend. She might still technically live with Chris and Dov but she'd been spending almost all of her free time at Holly's house.

Holly tried to contain her grin as she nodded at Gail. "We can do that, sure."

Gail reached over and took hold of Holly's hand, she was past caring what people thought of her relationship with Holly. "Good." As they walked by Andy, who was still staring wide eyed at them, Gail stopped and gestured to the rest of the room with her free hand. "Guess that makes the room yours, cry away." She told her before walking out of the room with Holly.

Holly kept her comments to herself, she knew Gail was probably on emotional overload and whatever Andy had been saying to her before she arrived was probably taking its own toll. Especially considering Nick had basically left Gail for Andy so Holly let her girlfriend lead them through the waiting area and back out the side door Holly had used herself not minutes before.

It was only when they started down the street away from the hospital that Holly finally had to ask, "Are we walking back to my place?" Because that was a long way away.

Gail grinned and gave Holly a sideways glance. "Your place?"

Holly blushed and stuttered as she pushed her glasses back up her nose as they moved when she ducked her head. "Ah, well, we can, ugh..."

Gail chuckled and bumped shoulders with her girlfriend. "I'm teasing."

Holly sighed and managed a smile. "I drove my car you know."

Gail shrugged, then she took in a deep breath of fresh air and glance up at the night sky. Tonight, or really, yesterday, was a turning point. It was one of those days that changed everything that came after, Gail could tell, she could feel it.

Maybe Sam would live and he and Andy would finally get it together, or he could decide that Marlo was worth more than to be his second choice. Maybe Andy would admit to herself that she should have picked Sam over her job.

Maybe.

But for Gail it was simple, she couldn't change how she had behaved towards Holly yesterday, but she could change the way she treated her from now on, and that started with being more open with the people she worked with about their relationship. Traci, Chris, Dov and Chloe already knew about Holly because Gail had introduced her to them all.

Gail had wanted to do it slowly, on her terms and in her own time. That way she would be sure of the reaction she was likely to get until she came to the point where she had to talk to her parents about Holly.

Something Gail would have been happy to never do.

But that was before today, when she walked into a building and risked never seeing Holly ever again. When she had rejected the woman holding her hand right now for the simple reason that holding hands with Holly in front of Steve would have embarrassed her, and left her brother with questions she hadn't been ready to answer, not right there and then.

"It's a beautiful night." She said still eyeing the dark, almost cloudless sky. She then turned to Holly. "Is it okay if we just walk?"

Holly studied her girlfriend for a long moment. "Okay." She finally agreed. Her house was a few miles away but she figured they could try flagging down a cab if it came to that.

Holly chuckled as less than ten minutes later Gail was pulling her into a park and over to a bench.

"Let me guess, you don't do walking?" She asked before taking her seat beside the blonde.

Gail shrugged. "It's been a long day." She said into the silence that followed.

"That it has."

"It's not over you know."

Holly blinked and looked away from the star filled sky to eye Gail. "What do you mean?" She asked.

"Just, everything's different now. Things are going to change, Andy and Sam, Nick, Dov and Chloe, Ollie, things can't stay the same after this." She knew, after her abduction things had been different, like she'd said to Chris in the squad car, it was only recently when she started to feel like she was less numb. Like she was waking up from a deep sleep, that the fog was finally lifting from her mind.

She looked up at the sky again and the stars. They looked so amazing and full of magic. She recalled nights spent out in the back yard of the family cabin they'd go to every summer as kids. The sky never looked as bright or as clear back home in the city.

"What do you mean?" Holly asked carefully, not sure where Gail's thoughts were going.

Gail turned to Holly. "This is when they have to make a choice, about what comes next. Will Chloe pick Dov or her husband Wes, Andy and Sam or Andy and Nick?" Gail shrugged. "They all have to decide."

Holly took Gail's hand in both of hers. "And what about you, what did you decide?"

Gail smiled, slowly at first but then it grew wide and unabashed. "I made my choice last year." She confessed in a whisper as she leaned over to Holly.

Confused but intrigued Holly had to know. "And what was that?" From the conversation so far Holly gathered that Gail was talking about her abduction being her moment, the point where she had to make a choice as to what came next for her.

Gail looked back up to the sky again. "You know I used to star gaze when I was a kid? Just during the summers night when we stayed at the cabin up north, the sky was never the same back here."

"It's the artificial light." Holly couldn't help but explain.

Gail rolled her eyes and chuckled. "You just can't stop yourself can you?" She asked.

Holly sighed as she blushed. "Sorry, but no, probably not."

"That's okay, it's one of the things I love about you."

"One of the things?" Holly fished with a grin, suddenly feeling less embarrassed.

"Eh, it's a long list." Gail admitted with a shrug. "We'd be here all night."

Holly bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself telling Gail that they had all night anyway and instead lifted Gail's hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it before securing it back in her lap, encased in both of hers.

Gail smiled at Holly before carrying on. "Every time I saw a shooting star I used to make a wish, even as I got older." She admitted with a giggle. It felt silly when she had gotten older but she just could stop herself. "Because what if, you know? What if that thing you wished you'd get suddenly was right there in front of you?" She looked directly into Holly's dark eyes as she spoke. "But I stopped wanting a long time ago, when I realised that it didn't really matter what I wanted." She snorted. She hadn't had the worst childhood, far from it, she'd been given more than most, but it came with a price and for a long time she had resented that.

Holly felt her throat tighten as she watched her girlfriend struggle.

"But last year," Gail felt her eyes water again and had to swallow as a lump choked her speech. "Last year, I decided to want something for me again." She managed before the tears started falling again. She brushed some away and tried her best to continue. "What I decided was that while my career was chosen for me I'd at least get to decide who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with."

That's what she'd hoped when Nick had said they should get married all those years ago, but he'd broken her heart by disappearing. Last year she vowed to give him a clean slate and that she'd try her best to be everything he wanted and then maybe she'd get it right this time.

"I decided I was going to let someone all the way in, and that scared the crap out of me let me tell you!" Gail said as Holly chuckled and wiped away a few tears of her own.

"I thought it was supposed to be Nick and then I watched him fall for Andy while I was right there beside him the whole time." That had been a kicker, to have to have Chloe point it out even though she knew something felt different since they had come back, but she'd tried to ignore it, because he was Nick, he was supposed to be the guy. Her guy.

"So that didn't work out too well." She gave Holly a lopsided grin. Then she turned serious again. "But it didn't change anything because here you are and here I am." She said. "It might not have been what I pictured looking up at those stars all those nights, but I wouldn't change us for anything in the world Holly."

Holly grinned, the bite of the cold no longer touching her as the warmth of Gail's words and the heat from her smile seemed to be all she needed.

"But that doesn't mean I'm not scared anymore, because I am, and I'm sorry about how I treated you at the station."

Holly shook her head, Gail had already apologised she didn't need to keep saying sorry. "It's okay really, I get it."

"I'm not sure you do, I'm not scared to be your girlfriend, of people knowing that, I'm scared of getting hurt again and having everyone watch." Like they did when Chris dumped her and when Nick fell for Andy and climbed into her bed at the first opportunity.

"I'm not going to hurt you, I love you Gail." Holly admitted, hoping her words would be enough.

Gail nodded, she did know that, she could see it in Holly's eyes every morning they woke up together or when they made love, or just in the quiet moments when the pathologist would just turn and look at her for no real reason.

"I know, that's another reason that I love you." Gail winked at Holly.

Holly grinned. "You think I can hear the full list?"

"Maybe one day, but not tonight." Gail said.

"Move in with me?" Holly asked as she shifted in her seat to stare at the blonde.

Gail's lips twitched as she turned her eyes upward again. "That sounds nice enough but I was kinda working up to asking you to marry me, but hey, if you want to do the liv- ugh" Gail grunted as Holly's weight collided into her, then she was grinning and wrapping her arms around her.

This was a good sign right?

"Yes! Yes I'll marry you." Holly insisted quickly as she tightened her hold on Gail as she started to cry. She'd been so scared until Gail had called her that she had frightened the blonde away. "And then we can try living together." She said teasingly to Gail as she pulled back enough to look her in the eye.

Gail snorted. Fat chance of that, she was basically living with Holly as it was they'd just both been too scared to admit it. "Whatever. Let's see how long that idea lasts." She said narrowing her eyes at her girlfriend, no fiancée.

Holly watched a smile blossom on Gail's face and it was too much she just had to be kissing Gail now.

Gail let Holly control the kiss, enjoying having Holly in her arms at the end of a very scary day. They'd both survived to be right here at the end of it so that made it worth the panic and the stress she'd felt most of her shift.

But it was over with now, well most of it, and what wasn't she had no control of.

Except this. This was all her and Holly together.

It felt great to be alive right now.

Holly eased out of the kiss but stayed close as her hands traced over Gail's features, mapping every inch of her face. "You really want to marry me?" She asked, maybe if Gail had more time to think about it, and wasn't letting her emotions talk for her she might take it back.

Holly had no idea how she would cope with that but she had to make sure this was really what Gail wanted.

"Lunchbox and all." Gail replied with a lazy grin, confident from Holly's reaction that she was making the right choice. Finally. She watched Holly grin back at her and couldn't help herself, "Well, seeing as I'm already sleeping with you, I thought I might as well make a decent woman out of you."

Holly chuckled and slapped at Gail.

Gail breathed out and touched her forehead to Holly's. "I've never loved anyone like this before, honestly I never thought it was possible but-"

"I do have access to drugs you know." Holly interjected with a giggle as she shifted, wrapping her arms around Gail's neck.

Gail rolled her eyes and squeezed Holly around the waist. "I'm trying to be serious here." She protested.

"Sorry."

"And so you should be." Gail replied quickly and tried to remember what she was trying to say. She pouted at Holly when she couldn't pick up where she'd left off. She sighed after Holly pressed a quick kiss to her lips. "Oh, yeah, right." Now she remembered. She frowned at Holly. "Just so we're clear, you aren't drugging me right? I have to pee in a cup at random intervals you know."

Holly laughed and shook her head. "Go on, I'll be quiet."

"Ugh, not sure it's worth it anymore." Gail said but she did want to explain. "But okay," She said earning a grin from Holly that she couldn't help but return. "I just, didn't expect you to come into my life, and it's been different, with you, better I guess?" Gail frowned not sure if she was saying this properly.

"You do know you asked me to marry you right?" Holly asked. "Try giving your potential future wife some props huh?"

Gail bit her bottom lip and leaned over and kissed Holly slowly. "The sex is totally hot, the best I've ever experienced, although I have only been with-"

"Shh, quit while you're ahead." Holly told a grinning Gail as she pressed a finger to the blonde's lips.

Gail shrugged unrepentant.

"What I'm trying to say is that I'm not afraid anymore." Gail told Holly as she looked her in the eyes. "Any of us could have died today, and it's all I've been thinking about. After Jerry died I asked myself if he would have thought I was worth it."

"Gail." Holly tried saying not wanting Gail to talk like that.

Gail frowned. "But it's true. He died Holly and I lived, tonight Chloe or Sam, they could die too and it sucks it does, but it just makes how I feel about you all the more real. Because it's fragile, love, life, and I don't want to spend time worrying about what my colleagues might think or what my mom will have to say, so if you'll have me I'd like to spend the rest of my life with you."

Holly had tears falling from her eyes again. She worked with death on a daily basis, she understood how quickly the people you loved could slip away.

"I would love to marry you Gail." Holly replied earnestly before kissing Gail on the lips again and again.

Gail smiled into the kisses. "And live with me?"

Holly laughed and nodded. "And live with you, yes."

Gail kissed Holly again before pulling back. "And my cheese puffs?"

"No, there I draw the line!" Holly said with a terrified look. "No cheese puffs!"

Gail pouted. But if there was one person she would give up cheese puffs for it was probably the woman in front of her. She let out a disappointed sigh. "I guess if you have to deal with my mother I guess I can give up cheese puffs." She was pretty sure she was getting the better end of that deal anyway.

Holly's eyes grew wide at the mention of Elaine Peck. "Yeah, maybe we could have, like, a really long engagement?"

"Or we could elope?" Gail offered before shrugging. "Not sure she'd be very happy with that though." She said as her grin grew.

Holly climbed up off of Gail and straightened her clothes. "You know, maybe on second thought we shouldn't rush into anything just yet. Take our time, see how we feel in another year or two? It's been a traumatic night."

Gail scowled as the pathologist started to back away from the bench she was sat on. "Oh, no, you said yes Holly, you don't get to back out."

Holly glanced around them pointedly. "And yet there's not a single person that can verify your version of events." She told the blonde with a happy smile.

Gail pouted and crossed her arms over her chest and looked at her girlfriend sadly.

Holly's shoulders slumped under the look. "But I don't want to deal with your mother."

"You think I do?" Gail asked with a snort before getting up and taking Holly's hand again. It was late and getting colder by the minute. She started them back towards the hospital.

Holly sighed as they walked in silence.

"Fine, but you better not make me regret this!" Holly told Gail sternly. "And you'll be the one to tell her." That was only fair right?

Gail thought she could do that by letter, maybe after the actual wedding. That would still count right? "The things I do for you." She groused.

Holly pulled Gail closer and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "I can't wait to be married to you, and have to listen to your complaints on a daily basis."

"Daily?" Gail scoffed. "Hourly."

They both chuckled as they made their way back into the parking lot of the hospital. It was still crowed with squad cars. That had to be a good sign right?

As they approached the building Gail glanced up and smiled as a star flashed across the sky.

And just like she had as a child Gail closed her eyes and made a wish.

Only this time she was making it for someone else.

She didn't need it anymore.

She squeezed Holly's hand and wondered what it would feel like with a ring, or how her own would feel wrapped around her finger.

"Holly Peck, has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" She asked jokingly as they walked in through the sliding doors.

Holly scowled and glanced at Gail who she finally noticed was grinning like an idiot. Or maybe just someone in love.

"Gail Stewart sounds much better if you ask me."

And Gail thought she just might be right.

xxxxxxx

AN/

Scoobeedooh, look a new chapter!

Okay so maybe not the most uplifting of chapters but it's laid the foundation for the last chapter, so the next and final part will be a look into the future lives of Gail and Holly Peck, or is that Stewart?

Thanks for reading guys!