AN: I lay no claim to the original characters, I am just expanding their story beyond the movie we all love and adore.
Chapter Three – Trying to Adjust
Sarah had spent the entire evening diligently examining the pages of the little red book. No matter how many times she went through the story, the ballroom scene was always missing. For her, that meant only one thing, she had fallen for a trap that hadn't been in the story and as a result had lost the game. Why the king had allowed Toby to come home, she wasn't sure, but she had solidified one fact in her mind – she had lost the game. No game would ever surpass the one she played with the Goblin King, but still she had not defeated the him; no doubt lingered in her mind about that fact, and because of her failure, she believed no words would ever bring the Goblin King back to her. Not only had she lost the game, but she had also lost him and that belief caused an immense ache in her heart – one she could only compare to the ache she felt when her mother deserted her and yet, this one seemed to hurt more.
At supper, her dad and stepmom cautiously observed as she picked at her food, and then she excused herself early to retire to her room. After she left, they discussed the option that she was coming down with something and admitted to each other their growing concern for her health, but it never crossed their minds that her sickness was the result of one extremely handsome king for who she was now pining.
The rest of the week followed a similar pattern for her, and Creeia watched it all carefully. He expected the King to call soon and require him to share everything he had discovered, so he collected every bit of information his mind could retain. From the older humans he had learned she wasn't eating much, which caused them some concern about the girl's health, and he knew that she cried herself to sleep most nights, and then tossed and turned throughout the night. He also heard her cry out either "He didn't come," "He isn't coming ever," or "I lost" while asleep. He wasn't sure what any of it meant, but he carefully recorded it all in his diminutive brain capacity by continually repeating the information to himself so he wouldn't forget any of it.
When the king finally summoned him home on Friday, he was extremely thankful because he knew if he had been required to wait any longer, he would have forgotten some of the information. As it was, he was able to convey all he remembered to the king, but not in the correct order. He first told the king of the restless sleep and bad dreams – he figured that was the most important information. The king only frowned when he heard about the words – especially 'I lost.' He could not imagine any reason why a champion would say, 'I lost' and what exactly she believed she had lost was beyond his comprehension. Then Creeia relayed the information about the pictures on the mirror; he wasn't sure if it was important, but at least he had remembered, and that information reminded him of the dwarfs visit. Attempting to put events back he order, he informed the king that the dwarfs visit came first and then the girl had covered the mirror with the pictures after he left.
The king frowned in confusion. 'Did she cover the mirror to keep Higglewood from visiting or for some other still unfathomable reason?' he asked himself.
Creeia next remembered the old humans and told the king that they were worried about the girl; when the king asked why Sarah's parents were worried, Creeia replied that it had something to do with eating but he couldn't quite remember what. He finally mentioned the little red book, "Read it every night, she did. Then she'd cry self to sleep. Why the girl reads something make her cry, don't know, don't understand," he told the king as he finished his report. A large grin crossed his face for his job was finished and he felt he had done a fine job. As soon as the king dismissed him, he planned to celebrate with at least a dozen tankards of ale.
Jareth waved Creeia away, and sat to brood about what he had learned. The report did not please him. Sarah should have been happy; she not only defeated him, but also rejected him, and still he allowed her to go home. In his mind, she should be happy, content, and proud of the fact that she had bested him at his own game. Instead, she seemed to have fallen into despair.
It bothered him that her parents were worried about her, but it concerned him even more that he didn't understand the reasons behind their worries. In addition, he could not conceive of any reason why Sarah would cry out at night, and her words made no sense to him. After what he had heard, he wanted, more than anything else, to go and see for himself what was really happening. She had done so much recently that confused him. He should have gone himself in the first place. Goblins were good at taking wished away children, but fell short of being good spies.
Sarah's final words barred him from going to her, but he had been able to go in his owl form that first night of the party, so he resolved to visit her himself instead of sending another goblin to watch her.
His compulsion to keep his concerns for the girl hidden from his subjects forced him to wait until the castle was silent before stealthily taking flight to the aboveground. Upon reaching Sarah's house, he settled quietly outside her window. It was extremely late, so he missed Hoggle's visit, but he did notice that her mirror but only partially covered with pictures; he remember Creeia telling him that Sarah covered the entire mirror. This only proved he should have come because obviously the goblin had remembered the information incorrectly. His only consolation was that Creeia had remembered as much as he did.
As owl Jareth watched from his perch on the branch, he witnessed Sarah fitfully tossing and turning in her sleep, and many times throughout the night, he heard her sob out the words 'He didn't come' and 'I lost.' That last phrase still troubled him because he hadn't figured out what she thought she had lost. She had won her brother back, she had defeated him, and she had rejected his final offer, so what could she have lost, and besides that, who hadn't come and to what. So many uncertainties plagued him as he watched Sarah through the remaining night, but no solutions presented themselves to resolve his unease or answer his multitude of questions.
He originally planned to go leave early in the morning, but just as he was about to leave, she sat up abruptly in bed, hold out her arms, and cried, "Please don't leave me." Her words, for reasons unbeknownst to him, had an irresistible pull on him, and he suddenly realized he could not leave, so he stayed and watched as Sarah's day began to unfold.
Sarah woke feeling empty and lonely, and even though it was Saturday, she dreaded the day knowing that nothing exciting or satisfying would happen. The make-believe play in the park Saturday's had ceased for her completely. She knew in her heart that pretend would never again come close to matching her glorious thirteen hours in the labyrinth. This Saturday, instead of rising with anticipation, she lethargically dragged herself of bed, cleaned up and dressed. Then she trudged slowly downstairs for a breakfast she had no desire to eat.
Since the night of the party, she discovered she had little interest in food. Very few things held any real interest for her anymore because she felt something extremely important was missing from her life, and without it, nothing else seemed to matter – not food or her play-acting. She had lost her enthusiasm for normal life, which she now found so monotonous that she had no interest in taking an active part of it. To her parents, she appeared overly tired; they saw her dragging herself through the day void of all energy, and the spark for life that she once had now seemed missing.
The listless that she felt was bad, but the internal restless that gnawed at her was worse. Since experiencing the labyrinth, she knew there was more to life than what she had experienced in this world, and she began to long for the other world that she had only briefly tasted. Inside, the hunger grew washing out any desire to become a more active participant in this world. 'If only' was a continual internal lament for her.
She arose every morning now with a noticeable empty void inside of her; a void nothing seemed to fill, and this exceedingly achy void she continued to sense throughout her waking day.
At the breakfast table that morning, she only pushed the food around on her plate, nibbled a little of it, and then asked to be excused from the table. Her parents had watched this same routine at every meal for the last week and it fueled their apprehension about her health and welfare.
After cleaning off her plate of the remaining food, she informed her parents she needed to go to the library to do some research for a school project. She then filled a backpack with the few things she would need to carry through with her charade before leaving the house.
Jareth, in his owl form, watched as much as possible through the windows that were available to him. He saw that Sarah ate very little, heard her plans for the morning, and watched as she filled a sort of bag and left the house. He followed unnoticed as she and her shaggy dog slowly walked toward the park where he had first found her. It was simple for him to guess her destination, so he flew ahead and settled in his favorite tree to await her arrive. He thought she would spend her time play-acting like she had always done before when he watched; however, it surprised him that instead of acting out some fantasy as she usually did, she sat on the ground, pulled out a little red book, and quietly read from it.
Occasionally, as she read, she spoke to her shaggy companion who lay beside her on the grass. Jareth listened intently to these snippets of one-sided conversation hoping to discover what the girl was actually thinking and feeling.
He watched as she reached out and patted the dog's head idly as she spoke, "This is where I was cruel Merlin. Right here I said the words that caused the goblins to take Toby away, and then he appeared. Oh Merlin, he looked fearful and marvelous just as I imagined he would."
Jareth watched as she tilted her head slightly to the left and stared off into the distance. Then Sarah murmured, "I wonder were the words came from," and then she lifted the book back up and continued reading.
Sarah stopped again and looked toward her dog, "Look Merlin, this is where I fell into the oubliette and Hoggle rescued me. Not because he wanted to of course, no – I had to trick him into helping by giving him that silly plastic bracelet." He enjoyed the soft smiled that spread across her ruby lips.
He had known the dwarf had received the bracelet from her, but until now, he hadn't realized why she had given it to him. The silence blanketed them again, until she spoke up again.
Holding up the book as if her shaggy friend could read, she exclaimed, "Right here Merlin! He waited for us right here." Her voice became softer as she continued, "Oh Merlin, he was perfect. He said exactly what I had always imagined he would say," she pulled the book back, gazed down at the page, and slowly ran her finger across the page. In fact, to the Jareth's eyes, it looked as if she were caressing the page, and it made him slightly envious because he wished it where him her finger was caressing. He paused in his observation of her to speculate just what it might feel like if her fingers were caressing his cheek.
As he watched, Jareth realized she was deep in thought again. He knew some Fae could hear the thoughts of humans, but that was an ability denied to all the goblin kings because the High King believed it would be an unfair disadvantage to the runners of the labyrinth. The goblin kings already had the ability to change the rules during the game, so they would have found it much easier to delay the runner if they had access to the human's thoughts.
Sarah suddenly laughed as she looked at the dog again and commented, "He cheated; it was the first time he really cheated. Oh Merlin, I was really mad at the time, but when he challenged me . . . oh my . . . it was exciting and terrifying at the same time."
Jareth began to wonder if she was referring to the tunnel where she had maligned his labyrinth. He had become so angry that he had taken two hours away from her. He smiled to himself when he remembered her words, 'That's not fair,' and how there were those sparks of flames in her eyes, eyes that were so vocal that he could have remained in that spot just to see what else she might say with them. Her laughter pulled him out of his reverie, and he again perked up to listen carefully to what she might say next.
It was a quiet laugh, but still full of more merriment than he had seen her display since she had arisen that morning. Her first words angered him, but those that followed surprised him.
"A piece of cake," she laughed again, "that was really rude of me and it was a lie. I lied to him Merlin, but I think he knew it as soon as the words were out of my mouth. Still, it was wrong of me, but I said it without thinking because he made me mad, and then he stepped so close to me. I wonder if he knew how I felt when he was that close . . . so close I could feel . . .," she paused as her lips turned up causing a bright smile to make her face slightly glow. Then she shook her head as if to clear it, "Well, that was also where Hoggle said he was leading me back to the entrance." She laughed softly again, "It was so thrilling Merlin; so enlivening," she concluded as she looked back down at the book.
Jareth watched and waited as she began to read the book again. It intrigued him to watch the faced she made while reading. Sometimes she would crease her lovely brows or wrinkle her nose, and her mouth he found the most interesting. It would go from smiles, to frowns, to a small circle of surprise, but what really drew him were the lips themselves. They were full, red lips, and once in awhile her tongue would flick out and lick them. Deep inside of him, a desire began to grow, a desire to taste those lips, a desire to kiss them and watch her reaction to his kiss. It was too bad, he thought, that he would never have a chance to fulfill that desire because her words, 'you have no power over me,' would keep him away until she called him, until she invited him back into her life. The sound of her voice abruptly interrupted his thoughts, and he turned his attention back onto her.
"Look Merlin, this is where I made my mistake. This is the only place where I could have lost, and that is why he didn't come when I invited him. I should have known," she paused as if in thought, and then began again, "I should have known because it wasn't a part of the original game."
Once more, Jareth longed to hear her thoughts because her words puzzled him, and the fact that she kept referring to the little red book puzzled him more. He became curious enough about the book that he descended from the tree, he changed to his human form, and froze time; he had to see what she was reading and what game she was of speaking, and he believed the book would divulge that information. As he enforced the magic, it suspended Sarah in time with her mouth slightly parted, her hand reaching for the dog, and a single tear just peeking out of the corner of her eye.
Jareth quickly strode over to the girl and carefully lifted the open book from her lap where her finger barely touched it, and then noticed how the well-worn book easily laid open to the page she was reading. Jareth knew he couldn't keep time frozen for long, so he quickly made a perfect replica of it, and then replaced the original before quickly moving to the edge of the wood and hid himself among the trees.
Once time began again, he watched as the tear slid down the girl's cheek while she lifted her head as if looking for something or someone.
He strained to hear her words as she whispered to the dog, "Do you feel that Merlin? It feels like magic, and it smells like . . ." she paused while scanning the area intently causing Jareth to receded slightly into the shadow of a large tree to remain unseen, "No, Merlin," she resumed speaking in a normal tone, "I must be mistaken. He didn't come before and he won't come know. I lost everything of any real importance when I failed to win the game. Oh Merlin, how am I ever going to survive this? Nothing is interesting anymore; nothing has meaning anymore." She lovingly patted the dogs head while softly tears fell freely as she mourned the loss of someone extremely dear to her.
Jareth understood that she believed she had lost 'some' game, but he had to discover 'what' game she really meant. If she meant 'his' game, then he had to discover why she thought she had lost when everyone in the kingdom knew she had won. It was only becoming more confusing as to what she was thinking, and since he could not delve into her thought, he decided it was time to search for answers in the book she seemed so interested in, so he tucked the red book inside of his shirt, shifted into his owl form, and flew home. Arriving at the castle, he immediately went to his library, pulled out the little red book and began reading it.
The story it contained did not follow the exact path through the labyrinth as Sarah's, but there were many parallels to her story. When he came to the page she had mentioned to the dog about making a mistake and losing, he discovered it was at the point where Hedgewart had given her the peach, which transported her to the crystal ballroom. The red book contained no mention of a peach or a ballroom or a dance meant to tempt the girl so she would forget about the baby, but it had become his favorite part of the game.
He smiled as he remembered the dance; he remembered how it had felt to hold the girl in his arms and twirl her around through the crowd of on watching Fae. It had been so easy to forget that she was but a child. As he had stared into her eyes and sung to her, all he could see was the woman inside who was waiting to emerge, a beautiful, headstrong, and determined woman full of exceptional potential – his perfect match and one who would keep him guessing at every turn of their relationship.
So how, he wondered, could this lively, energetic, imaginative young girl have believed she had lost their game when she had beaten him at every turn? Every step of the way, she had thwarted his best attempts at stopping her, and she had done it with such self-control, determination, and charm that she had won the approval of his subjects. If she hadn't won their approval and respect, they would not have shown up at her celebration party, and yet she claimed 'he' hadn't come. The only one who had not responded to her invitation had been him, except as the uninvited watcher in owl form outside her window.
What if he had been wrong? What if she had invited him? That would mean he was no longer barred access to her because she had called to him, she had invited him back into her life. If it were true, then it opened an entirely new vista of opportunities for him.
After reading the book, pondering the questions that the book and her actions had produced, he decided his one course of action was to watch her for a while before deciding what his next move, if any, would be.
While Jareth was contemplating his next move, Sarah stayed in the park regrettably mourning the loss of her dreams. The dream about being able to continue her friendship with the one person who could challenge her imagination, who could send goose bumps of fear down her arms while encouraging her to stand up to him at the same time, and who could fill both the roles she felt her life was bereft of. The Goblin King had already generously granted the other dream, the one that allowed her to play a wonderfully fantastic game.
Had Jareth stayed, he would have heard the rest of the conversation that Sarah had with Merlin. When she reached the end of the story, she told Merlin, "You see these word, they were the biggest lie I told the goblin king. Maybe I couldn't remember the words because they were a lie. He had power over me. I think he still has power over me, but maybe not the kind like dad or Karen has. He doesn't have the power to tell what I can and cannot do, but there is another kind of power, something inside that pulls at me, that make me want to see him and talk to him. This power makes me want him to be my friend, to trust him with my secrets, to share my joys and heartaches with him." She stopped as she thought about what she said, and began to realize the truth behind what she was say. "Oh Merlin, if there were only some way I could tell him all of that, then maybe he would forgive me for lying, and maybe he would accept me as a friend." Having said all of that, the tears of regret freely ran down her cheek as she stared off into the distance dreaming of what might have been.
It was late afternoon when she finally picked herself up and wended her way slowly home. She hadn't realized it, but it had been almost a week since she had actually had a substantial meal, so that evening she actually ate some of her supper – not enough to fulfill all her nutritional needs, but enough to sustain her so her body didn't shut down on itself.
The following week presented the same pattern that Sarah had followed the previous week. She ate just enough to survive but not enough to fortify her. She also removed most of the pictures from her mirror once she realized no one was moving objects around in her room, and Hoggle, while she was sleeping, looked in on her occasionally to see how she was doing. He did not like what he saw because every time he looked she appeared to be a little thinner and during the day, when he looked, he noticed pronounced dark circles visible under her eyes.
Hoggle was not the only one who had been watching her that week. Jareth had kept a crystal trained on her and once in awhile he went in person to observe her. He was still trying to ascertain whether she had actually invited him that night along with the rest of his subjects, and he continued repeating her words to himself. She had very distinctly said, "I need you Hoggle. Every now and then I need all of you . . ." The word 'all' stayed the clearest in his mind. All meant everyone, so all had to have included him. What he couldn't figure out was why he hadn't felt pulled into her room like everyone else. Had it been because of his pride because she had beaten him? Still, he had gone to watch and nothing had barred him from watching or from perching in the tree outside her room. He couldn't help but wonder what would have happened if he had actually tried to enter her room. Would her new words have allowed him in, and if so, would she have been glad to see him?
The more he thought about it, the more he began to realize other things. For instance, he was still able to observe her through his crystals, and if her words had carried the power to keep him out of her life, then he should not have been able to watch her using the crystals. Nothing had barred him from following her to the park, or from following her around during the week. For that matter, he had not felt any kind of power surrounding her that would have forced him away, and he had been able to approach her to make a copy of the red book she was always reading.
He reflected on these facts often. In fact, his reflections often caused him to overlook other events that were occurring in his kingdom and even in the throne room. A number of times, one of the goblins would make an error that generally carried a penalty of either being kicked or tossed into the bog, but during the past few days, the goblins realized that something, other than them, was occupying the king's mind.
A small group of them was huddle in a corner on the opposite side of the throne room from where Jareth sat. They had been arguing about the cause of the king's distraction when Creeia joined them.
"King worried bout something," a short crooked nosed goblin observed.
"Sure, but who know what it about?" Asked a middle-sized goblin with off-centered eyes and over-sized ears.
Then Creeia spoke up, "The girl, it's all bout the girl?"
"What girl?" A number of them asked at the same time.
Now, Creeia hadn't been silent about the job the king had given him. In fact, by now half of the goblins in the city knew the king had sent him to spy on the girl because Creeia wore his service to the king as a badge of honor; the king did not entrusted many goblins were with such an important task, so he felt he had something to be proud of. Pride also brings about boasting, and that was what Creeia had done but not in a way that showed the others that he thought he was better than they were. Instead, he boasted more about his pride in services rendered to his king.
Figuring this group had no heard about his special task, he clarified, "The girl who ate the peach."
"Her, thought he forgot that one," the crooked nosed goblin snorted. He didn't like the girl or her friend much because his was one of the houses that suffered the most damage during the battle.
"No, he think bout her a lot. Some say he goes to see her," Creeia expounded.
"I like her. She only one beat him," offered a taller goblin with some semblance of human like features about his face. "This girl would be good for him. She would be good queen. Kingdom and king need a good queen, been too long without one," he observed.
Creeia agreed, as well as some the others who had walked over to hear Creeia talk about his task, but a few didn't think a queen was necessary or that the king would ever agree to bind himself to anyone.
One of the smallest goblins present exclaimed, "King too selfish!"
What no one knew was that the king had walked over to see what this particular group was doing. He had smiled to himself when he hear the part about him and the kingdom needing a queen, that was where he had been close enough to overhear the conversation, so he missed the first part.
"Selfish!" he roared after the comment was uttered causing the smallest goblin to quake. "Who dares to claim I'm selfish?" He challenged them.
The goblins all looked at each other; those who hadn't taken part in the conversation quickly disappeared from the room, and a few on the back edge, furthest away from the king, of the group also made a hasty retreat.
Some thought about pointing out the guilty party to avoid any penalty for themselves, but before anyone could point a finger, Creeia boldly stepped forward and said, "We talking about the girl."
Jareth just stared at him waiting for an explanation.
Creeia looked down at his toes and thinking what to say next, and then looked up as he offered, "She make good queen. She sad though, like king. Maybe she needs to come home."
"What do you mean come home? She is home." As Jareth and Creeia spoke, many of the other goblins took the opportunity to vacate the throne room. Even their homes, they thought, would be better than stay in the king's presence.
"Not home to her. She lonely there. She sad there. This be home now. She won the challenge, she now part of the kingdom."
"That can never be unless it is her wish, and you know that. It is part of the rules, and you cannot break the rules," Jareth reminded him.
"King bends rules, bend for her. You like her." Creeia felt somewhat bolder since the king hadn't kicked him yet. Along as the king would listen, he decided he would talk. He had decided, after returning home, that someone needed to tell the king how he really felt, but at the time, he hadn't planned to be the one to do it.
"Not this time. This time it has to be her decision; I will not bend the rules or force her into anything. Besides, she spoke the word barring me from her side."
"King was close night of party. King been close lately too." Although he would not outright admit it, Creeia had been watching the king and he had seen him coming and going to the aboveground a number of times over the past few days.
"Creepy, I may have sent you to watch the girl, but I never gave you leave to watch me." Jareth put as much bite behind his words as he could muster. He was unwilling to tell Creeia that he admired that fact that he had stood up to his king, or that he seemed to like the girl more than some of the other goblins did.
"Not mean to, but was worried bout girl. Saw girl saw you watching girl. Watched to see she be okay." Creeia offered a small apologetic smile.
"Don't do it again Creeia that is an order." Jareth then turned and walked out of the throne room with the idea of Sarah as queen tantalizing his thoughts.
Creeia let out a deep long breath. He was no longer worried that he would spend time in the bog; the fact that the king used his proper name knew the order was official, so he would obey it, and that the king had left the room indicated no other punishment would be handed out to him, but just in case, Creeia decided to leave the castle for the rest of the day.
For Jareth, the question remained of whether he should try to approach Sarah and talk to her. He felt somewhat certain that she had done something to lift the ban on him, but he wasn't positive, and for some unfathomable reason, he couldn't seem to make up his mind about what he would do next. One option he had was to stay away from her and only watch from a distance until he could make a positive decision about what to do next. It was the option that he favored for the moment and decided to follow.
How long he would have stayed away, and how long she would have mourned his loss was something neither of them had to ponder for long because during the third week after her trip to the underground, fate stepped in to change both of their lives.
I wish to thank everyone who has taken time to leave a small token of appreciation for this story in the review box.
I also wish to send a special thank you to my beta readers L. A. Cornelius and lady-of-destruction-aria – thanks ladies you're doing a marvelous job.
