Writing has not been as hard as I thought. I guess in a way, a lift was taken over my shoulders. Helping a soul, who would face all the hardships I did as a child, has somehow been restorative. I have never really look back and try to solve my issues. Hell, I never ever accept I have issues. However, now I knew, I have deep scars in my personality. Deep scars from my ordeals; my funny uncle, the loss of my parents in an early age, the issue of my mother who constantly believed I have mental problems and been a lying little shit because of her strict conservatism; my loneliness of being other and not knowing the cause. Also school had been a big problem for me growing, where I never got accepted by children or by adults. Also my lack of concentration paid in lack of success. I believe my low self esteem started with all those and I try to recover it or hide it by, so to say, helping people. I guess I was craving to be accepted, to be needed by someone, to be someone (other then crazy Sookie) so I did take any risk to achieve them. That is my only explanation why I constantly find my self in life versus death situations. Also once Colonel Flood said that fairies love to flirt with disaster. I don't know if it is engraved in my genes from the start. However, I don't want Hunter to be like me, a low self esteemed person. I know I am also smart in a way, to realize your mistakes and accepting your problems is the first step to solve them, right? I kind of hope Hunter will learn from my mistakes. I know he would inevitably make his own but I still hope they won't be as grave as mine. Also, I hope he learns by my letters to trust himself better by knowing he is not abnormal or anything or alone and grace his gift with more conscious.

Ok, I also know I still am putting my situation back of my head right know by concentrating on the letters in a true Scarlet fashion but in a way I guess these analyzing thing will help me deep down better than anything I can do know. I have three days to write down my life in letters and with these iron bars, I really hope I can achieve...

My dearest Hunter,

As I said in my previous letter, I am still in no position to come by you personally however I want to help your life as much as I can. I know a life as a telepath is not easy. So, I believe if I can explain you my life and experiences as much as letters allow, you can at least have a glimpse of my mistakes and not follow mine. Please remember that I love you very much and I don't want you to make the same mistakes as I. I know you will have your own path together with your own mistakes but my dear, it is important to have a rock solid personality with such a hard-to-deal gift. But believe that; it really is a gift.

In a way, I don't want to burden you with my mistakes and I want to draw the portrait of myself as a confidant, smart, self-sufficient and victorious of every hardship kind of woman. Even if in some way these assumptions are correct, they are not the whole truth. I am duty bound to explain you basis of my mistakes because the other way would only be selfish and for only my self confidence and neediness and will not benefit you at all. You will need the whole perspective of another telepath as the supernatural world become more open. So here I am.

In my whole life, I "heard" what people never say but never quit thinking. As you probably know by now, they become such a disturbing noises at the age of even four. I never wanted to know what people think, never. And it literally upset my life knowing all the time. Or I did think so. When the first vampire walked into Merlotte's, I believed that God also christened me with peace, in a way only silence brings. Never in my life, till that point, I have ever been in silence. However; know that everything has a price just as this silence had a price for me, loss, ache and stupidity.

All my life, I live by knowing things even if I tried to shield, I was not that good. Without willing, I know what people hope or what they think, their problems, their prejudices, their sadnesses, their happiness, their secrets and their questions. I apologetically declare that it only brought me arrogance. I thought without realizing how wrong I am, I already know everything. I was too used to know every thought every people have in my little town so I subconsciously but arrogantly thought that I already know everything there is to know. I had always chastised my self for violating people's privacy, but nonetheless arrogant to know even subconsciously. That is or was my gravest mistake. And unfortunately did not realize this mistake till I am in this predicament. This is something I am really sorry for. Whole my life, I accused too many people of being high-handed and arrogant but I never realize I was also one of them, even if in a different way.

You got to understand; just "hearing" people does not always bring you knowledge, truth or smartness. You are not smart just because you hear people and know what they'll do or say before they act. You only got to be smart if only you think and analyze the situation in front of you before you act or react. People mostly think momentarily and with less words then a whole sentence. Like "milk, train and ball" rather then "tonight I will go to my playmate Hunter's home with my mama; play with my train however I don't want to share my train with Hunter but I can share my ball, maybe we can have a game in the park". Do you see the difference? In the first case, your assumptions will fill in the blanks and that is where the mistake starts. Assumptions, where you believe a certain train of thought to be the reality, will lead you to a false place. Like; when you think your father was angry with you for your gift, because you slip in front of his girlfriend is a wrong assumption. Where your father is actually afraid of this unknown, not you or your slip or your gift. He was afraid because he did not understand your gift at that moment. So, you have to think and analyze before everything.

Let me give you an example of my self, when the first vampire come in to Merlotte's, my workplace, there were some bad people thinking of doing bad things to the same vampire. Till that day my knowledge of vampires were only from television or magazines, which really was near to nothing. So, all by myself I run to help him because I thought he would need it. Do not get me wrong, helping someone in need is not wrong. However, the wrong things were that I did not even thought of a way to explain how come I know their bad purpose, or that the vampire himself can not solve the problem. It did not even occur to me that I was outing my self and my gift to the vampire, whom I did not have any idea about. See, the assumptive way? Just because there are bad people thinking bad things about him, I thought he needed my help. I directly believed without even thinking that he will not be any different then good, Samaritan people in my town. Instead of calling the police or some help like Sam, the owner, I just run to help to someone I don't know and have no I idea what is he capable of. It did not even occur to me that I was judging someone according to my knowledge of ordinary people in my town as if he was just one of them. I am not saying that he should be judged or analyzed differently because he is a vampire, I am saying that I should have analyzed according to my knowledge of that person particularly which was none at the moment.

I in all my life act first and thought or analyzed later, if at all. My life is full of alike situations. Unfortunately that is what brings me to my predicament at this point. So my dear Hunter, I will love you no matter what but please be smarter for me...

Love

Aunt Sookie

AN:

These characters and all the plots belongs to lovely Charlaine Harris, I am just playing in the sand box...

*I hope you enjoy. English is not my native language and this work is un-beta-ed, so all the mistakes are mine