DISCLAIMER: We don't own Harry Potter (Even if Harry only says one word this entire song). We also don't own Urinetown (Although I'm playing the awesomest part in the whole show for school: I'm in the CHORUS!!!!!!!!!). Well, aren't you cool, miss anti-pookie. =] Alas, I did not get a part in this amazing musical that we don't own. Much like A Very Potter Musical, but I really rather wish we did own it. I AM cool. Thank you for saying so. 'Cause, you know, we aren't basically the lamest children in the history of the social ladder. Maybe you are, but I have seniors, juniors, and sophomores who like me! Granted, I have very few freshmen who do...Yeah...but keep in mind, those are theatre kids, anti-pookie. They aren't exactly high on the social ladder either. But that makes them even awesome-r. Most of them are actually really popular. They're just cool popular people. Yes, well, we aren't. That's just my point. I'm not saying we're not amazing though. Because that would be a lie. And you know I never lie to you or our awesome readers. Alright, well, we probably shouldn't make this disclaimer as long as our first one. People will get bored of us. All I have left to say is that I'm very disappointed in all of you! Only two people sent in a song suggestion! And one of them wasn't even a song that we knew. But we're not really complaining about not knowing it—Now we just have to see that musical! But seriously, we don't get inspiration out of nowhere. You kinda need to help us out! So send in some more suggestions. We only have a few more planned. We have Run, Freedom, Run and the Act One Finale from Urinetown, and I Wanna Be Like Other Girls (Mulan 2 version. No pop songs here. No, no, no, no, no!)
This song is a parody of Snuff That Girl from Urinetown. If you don't know the song, I suggest you look it up on Youtube so you can hear it before reading this. Trust me, it will make a lot more sense if you do. Personally, I think that the Uarts version is the best, but it probably doesn't matter as long as you hear the song.
And I really want to give Slytherclaw-girl17 a shout out. Well, now you did. So yay, you did what you wanted! Hey, at least it's not going to cause a horrible drought. Anyways, Miss 17 is totally awesome. And we should probably stop talking! Yikes! 435 words! You know, this disclaimer isn't very funny. I wonder how Darren Criss would have done this?... Did someone say Darren Criss? But... You're not Darren, you're anti-pookie. SHHH!! They don't know that!
Important Note: We actually have rehearsed this (As we're going to try and put it on Youtube) so everything either works, we made it work, or is just hilarious in it's not working-ness. So suck it.
SNUFF THAT GUY
The youngest members of the Order of the Phoenix are hiding from the Death Eaters at Number 12, Grimmauld Place. They have taken Draco Malfoy as their hostage. Over the door of the house hangs a sign that says "SECRET HIDOUT: THE ORDER OF THE PHOENIX". Fred and George have been trying to convince the others that killing Malfoy is the only way to win this battle.
FRED: Whaddya think they talk about in those quorums they got up there? How awesome we are? So listen up, now! Any second those Voldy's are gonna bust in here and bust us up like a bunch of overripe kumquats.
GEORGE: So I say as long as our juice has gotta spill, all over this floor here, his juice has gotta spill too. Malfoy juice! Then we'll see who's better than who! He pauses That sounded really dirty, didn't it?
GINNY: Just a little.
FRED & GEORGE
Look at him there
All bound up, gagged, and tied
With his head full of air
And his heart full of pride!
Well, boys, we've had enough
Of each arrogant cry!
Bing! Bang! Boom!
Let's get tough
Plain' rough—
snuff that guy!
LUNA
Snuff that guy? But killing people is wrong.
GINNY
Then why does it feel so right?
Look at use here
In a hole, on the lam
With our hearts full of fear—
What a rip! What a sham!
Death Eater's will be here
Bustin' heads mighty quick!
FRED & GEORGE
But we'll beat them to the punch
When we snuff out that D--
HERMIONE: FRED! GEORGE!
GEORGE: What?
FRED: We were just going to say dummy!
GINNY
We tried doing what we should!
FRED & GEORGE
Wasn't glad...
GINNY
Then we learned that feelin' good
FRED & GEORGE
Means doin' bad!
GINNY, FRED, & GEORGE
Quaffles fall close
So they say, to the post
Lookie here, here's a
Goal from Malfoy I boast
I say, he is the ball
And of course, we're the Beaters
He's the reason for the game
So let's snuff that guy!
FRED
Bing!
GEORGE
Bing!
GINNY
A-Bing Bang!
LUNA
Bing Bang!
FRED & GEORGE
A-Bing Bang Boom!
LEE
Boom!
RON
Boom!
HARRY
Yeah!
GINNY
OK now, snuff!
BILL
Snuff the guy!
HARRY
Yeah!
LUNA & BILL
Snuff the guy!
GEORGE & LEE
Snuff him!
FRED & GINNY
Oh yeah, now go!
RON
Snuff the guy
HARRY
Yeah!
RON, LEE, FRED, GEORGE, & BILL
Snuff the guy!
ALL
Yeah, snuff the guy!
DANCE BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALL
This is the end
Wave your wands, cast your spells
In this mis'rable world
It does no good to dwells!
So now, let's live it up
RON
Eat the Steak and Kidney Pie
ALL
And let's get this party jumpin'
FRED & GEORGE
Do it for Dumbly-in
ALL (EXCEPT HERMIONE)
Get this party jumpin'
Yeah, let's snuff that—
Snuff that guy!
Muffled screaming could be heard coming from Malfoy, the gag over his mouth keeping him from yelling bloody murder.
"Brainless git," Fred muttered, smacking him on the back of the head to shut him up.
"He's the brainless git?" Hermione sounded infuriated.
"Hermione, is this the Dumbledore thing again?" George asked, "Cause you really have to let that go.
"I just don't think it's a very good way to honor his memory!"
"Saying his name wrong?" Ginny asked, confused. "Or killing Malfoy?"
"BOTH OF THEM! He wouldn't want us to become killers!" Hermione looked on the verge of angry tears.
"He'd understand the name thing, though! He'd love it!" The twins said in perfect unison.
"YEAH!" Harry added.
Seriously, guys, send in some suggestions! We would greatly appreciate it. Reviews would be appreciated as well, so give us some of those, too.
Hobey-Ho,
anti-pookie
