Ch 3: I Can Really Cook! Wanna Taste My Cupcakes?
Or
Double Entendre*: How to Give Canada a Bloody Nose
The door chimes called out, and before they could finish their melody, they started over.
"Okay, okay. Hold your horses!" Alfred hollered as he answered the door.
Arthur tried to hurry down the stairs but didn't make it in time. He entered the front room and glanced toward the entryway. Amelia caught his gaze and smiled slightly, trying not to call attention to the exchange.
"About time you got here," Alfred said. "I was getting worried."
"Sorry," she said, glancing at her brother. She returned her gaze to Arthur. "Hiya!" Amelia said, raising her hand in a high wave. "I'm Alfred and Matthew's sister, Amelia Jones."
"Amelia," Alfred groaned, "I thought we discussed this. You were supposed to introduce yourself as 'Traveling US Ambassador' Amy Smith."
"Oops," she said. Amelia shrugged and slightly stuck out her tongue. "I was so excited to finally meet Arthur that I kinda forgot."
Alfred threw up his hands in frustration.
Amelia winked at Arthur. He bit his cheek to keep from laughing; her slip-up was intentional. When they made full eye contact, Arthur caught his breath. It almost seemed as if a spark passed between them.
Amelia bit her lip and looked away, her cheeks reddening. "Don't freak out, bro," she said quietly. "I mean, come on. If you can't trust Arthur to not tell anyone, who can you trust?"
Alfred rubbed his chin; he obviously hadn't considered this. "Okay then," he said. "Artie, this is my sis. Sis, Artie."
Amelia looked sideways at her brother, smiled slightly, and then extended her hand. "Please to meetcha," she said. "You look just like your photo from last year's World Conference. Only less angry."
Alfred laughed loudly.
Arthur scowled at him.
She grabbed Arthur's hand and pumped it up and down enthusiastically.
Arthur raised an eyebrow. The Amelia upstairs was a little different from the one in front of him. I wonder why she's acting like that, he mused.
"Y'all have breakfast yet?" she asked.
"No, and we're starving," Alfred answered.
"Me too," Amelia said.
"Didn't you eat breakfast at the hotel where you stayed last night?" Matthew asked.
Arthur blinked. That's right, Canada was here too.
Amelia paused. "Not really. I had these bread-cake thingies. They were good, but I didn't finish when I realized what time it was," she said smoothly.
Matthew looked at the floor, and Arthur could see he was not convinced.
"Well I'll just have to make us all somethin' good," she said, "if it's okay with our host." She turned toward Arthur.
"Hold on. You're going to make breakfast for all of us?" Arthur asked. He cringed. Some of the culinary monstrosities Alfred made had a reputation of sending people to the hospital.
"She's really good at it," Matthew interjected.
"I'm only 'good' because you taught me how to cook, Mattie," Amelia pointed out. "It was one disaster after another with Al teaching me."
"You are technically my guest," Arthur said. "I can make everyone breakfast."
"That's not necessary," Amelia stated. "It's the least I can do since my brothers are staying here for free."
"That reminds me, Sis," Alfred said. "Where did you end up staying last night? You weren't here this morning, but your luggage and everything was."
Arthur noticed the pile of luggage in his front room for the first time.
"Well, since you two took the only beds and I didn't want to sleep on one of the couches, I decided to go with my original plan of where I wanted to sleep," she replied.
Arthur raised an eyebrow. Her original plan? But last night she came to my ro— He felt his cheeks tingle slightly when he realized what she had just confessed about her plan without actually saying it.
"Picking up and moving all my luggage by myself last night would have made a ton of noise and woken up Arthur, so I decided to only take my overnight with me," she replied as she plopped the small bag and jacket down on top of the suitcases. "But I don't know if I can stay there tonight, so I was going to take my luggage later if I got the go-ahead."
She gave Arthur as side-glance, and he felt himself start to sweat a little. Is she trying to get my permission to sleep in my bed tonight? he thought. Or does she plan on asking Alfred, "Hey bro, do you mind if I sleep with Arthur again tonight?" He tried his best not to show the trepidation he felt at that question. I'd rather not go to the World Conference in a body cast.
"So where exactly did you sleep last night?" Alfred repeated, sounding slightly irritated. "Not somewhere ritzy in this rich neighborhood of Artie's, I hope."
"Nah, the place I stayed at wasn't expensive at all. I love the design of the whole place! The room was beautifully decorated and comfortable, and the bed was sooooo soft and warm," Amelia said, giving Arthur another side-glance and a slight smile. "You don't need to worry about the bill either. I've got it covered."
Matthew's eyes grew wide at this statement; he looked at Arthur. Arthur tried to look nonchalant as he listened to the two siblings.
"If you say so, but—" Alfred said.
"I love the owner!" she gushed. "He's the best! I really love England, especially after last night."
Arthur blushed slightly at this comment.
Matthew's whole body started turning red. Arthur almost expected steam to start pouring off the top of his head.
Alfred, as usual, didn't notice any of what was going on. "I hope he's an old blind guy," he said. "I don't want him getting the wrong ideas and start hitting on you." His comment irritated Arthur for some reason.
"Aww Al, don't be so overprotective. I can take care of myself, y'know," Amelia said, "but I know the owner's been around for a long time if that helps you feel any better about it. Now, let's get breakfast started." She picked up another piece of luggage about the size of a beach bag and walked over to Arthur.
"Make pancakes," Alfred said.
"Can't do anything until Arthur here shows me his stuff," Amelia said, tugging on Arthur's sleeve. "Come on. Let's get cookin'."
Matthew choked and clapped a hand to his nose. A small trickle of blood leaked past his fingers.
"Whoa, Bro! You okay?" Alfred asked.
"Maple~," Matthew replied. More blood flowed.
Arthur marveled at Matthew's reaction to what was being said. I hope he isn't going to bleed to death in my front room.
"Tissue. Tissue," Alfred started tossing things around the room as he searched.
Amelia reached in the bag she'd picked up and flung something at him. "Use these."
Without even looking, Alfred caught the object easily. He glanced at it. "Tissue mini-pack, huh?" he said. He tossed it over to Matthew. "What else have you got in that 'essentials bag' you always take everywhere with you?"
"None of your business," she said, sticking out her tongue.
"Call me when you're done cooking," Alfred said, shrugging and looking around the front room. "Hey Artie, where's your TV?"
Amelia tugged on Arthur's arm again, trying to get him to move towards the hallway.
"You need to be careful," Matthew said.
"Mattie, I'm just pulling on his arm," she said. "I know my own strength. Geez. Send a guy to the hospital with a concussion a few times because he can't play softball, and he never forgives you."
"That's not what I meant," Matthew countered.
Alfred opened a closet. "Don't you have a TV in every room?" he asked.
"No, I mean if you're going to . . . um . . . you should use . . . um," Matthew stammered. "I mean if you and Arthur . . . aren't careful . . . you'll get in trouble with . . ." He glanced at Alfred, and Arthur guessed he was trying to keep their "secret" from earlier. ". . . It'll be an awful mess."
"Oh don't worry about that," Amelia said, patting the bag. "I make a point to always carry protection for that, just in case I'm not at home. It's one of my essentials. You'd know that, Mattie, if you'd ever bother to watch me in action."
Matthew reddened again, and the tissue he'd shoved in his nostrils also turned red.
"Geez Bro. Is it the low altitude?" Alfred asked, noticing his brother's nose.
Arthur coughed, knowing exactly how much their younger brother was misunderstanding what Amelia had said. "Matthew, don't bleed on the rug please," he said. "Alfred, the TV is in the lounge. It's almost time for Monty Python's Flying Circus, so you may want to hurry."
Alfred didn't waste another moment on his brother. "Come on, Mattie!" he called, rushing out of the front room.
Arthur stopped Matthew before he reached the doorway to the hallway. "It's not what you think," he told him. "Either Amelia or I will explain later. Right now, can you keep quiet about it?"
Matthew nodded and then left the room.
Amelia turned toward Arthur. "What are you talking about?" Amelia asked, releasing his arm. "What do I need to explain?"
"Matthew knows you were in my room last night," Arthur replied. "He saw your things by the fireplace."
"Nuts, I forgot that I just left them in that chair."
"So either you or I need to explain exactly what we did last night," he said. "Because he thinks we . . . you know."
It took her a moment to realize what he was implying. "Oh man, wait . . . so everything I just said . . ." Amelia said, letting out a laugh. "I never would have pegged Mattie for a pervert, though."
"Well, we were in the same bed all night long," Arthur countered. "Who wouldn't draw the same conclusion?" He folded his arms. "Your brother just has a very vivid imagination . . . " he concluded.
Amelia snickered.
". . . apparently," he added.
She let out another laugh but then suddenly looked serious. "You know, if Mattie had snitched to Al about what he thinks we did, I don't think that I could have talked my way out of that situation at all," she said thoughtfully. "I'll have to make it up to him somehow for keeping quiet." She appeared to ponder on that for a moment.
"I'm curious about one thing though," Arthur said finally.
"Hmm?"
"Protection?"
Amelia laughed again and set her bag on top of a nearby chair back. She opened it and pulled out a pink and white cloth. She slipped her arms through what looked like sleeves and then tied up the neckline and her waist. Her blouse and part of her jeans were covered by an unusual-looking apron.
"I may be 'really good' at cooking, as Mattie says," she said. "But no matter how hard I try to be tidy, I used to always end up with ingredients on my clothes. I borrowed this design from a Japanese lady I met and mixed it up with a traditional apron from the '50s by adding some pretty frills at the bottom."
Arthur chuckled. "Well that apron certainly will protect you from anything coming your way."
She returned the laugh. "Yup," she said. "Poor Mattie. Here I was going on, thinking I was sharing a private joke with you, and all the time he was . . ."
They both started laughing, unable to speak for a minute or two.
"Shall we?" Arthur said, trying to catch his breath from laughing and gesturing toward the doorway to the hallway.
"Um, actually I headed straight upstairs after those two took the only sleeping areas," Amelia said, wiping her eyes. "I don't know where I'm going down here."
"Oh, of course. This way," Arthur said, stepping towards the doorway.
Amelia picked up her bag and grabbed his right hand as he passed her.
Arthur stopped and looked at her.
She blushed and looked away for a moment, then back at him. Suddenly the joking from earlier didn't feel like joking anymore. "I don't want to get lost," she said finally.
He let out a small nervous laugh. "Don't worry. I won't let you."
She squeezed his hand lightly and smiled.
Arthur's throat suddenly felt dry, and he started worrying that his hand might start sweating.
A/N
*For those unfamiliar with the term, "Double Entendre" is when something is said (like a word or expression or sentence) in a context that it can be understood in two ways, especially when one meaning is risqué. So in that spirit, the first part of the title is a double entendre.
This is what I meant about telling me if you think my story should be rated higher than T. What do you think? Is the innuendo too much? (there will be more kissing much, much later so maybe I should ask you then) :p
