NOTE: Alright, so I WAS going to post this up until Sunday, but the reviews were just WAAAAAAY to inspiring, so...here goes another chapter. THANKS FOR THE LOVELY REVIEWS! I LOVE you guys! Oh, and also I'm going to be posting the lyrics to every song on the beginning of the chapter from now on. That can be the preview of what the chapter will be about. So, this time it's Akon's "Never Took the Time". Read the lyrics and you'll see how well it fits Hyde...especially in this moment.
A moment ago it seemed
It was yesterday
You were here with me
And everything seems to be the same
What am I supposed to do
With all these empty rooms?
Sit here in solitude
With the smell of your perfume
Ya never took the time to understand
Ya never took the time to know me
Yeah
Cause lovin' you is all I ever had
Still lovin' you is all I ever have
This wasn't what I wanted to be
A man in misery
Girl I look back a thousand times
And can't believe that you left me
Why you leave me baby
Why can't you understand my pain
How can I explain
Girl I don't know what I'm doin' wrong
I can't believe that your love is gone
Ooh yeah
You're all I need
You're all I see
And I wish that we could do it again
Because of you now I'm just a lonely man
Oh
Because of you now I'm just a lonely man
CHAPTER 3: "Never Took the Time" by Akon (directed towards both Jackie and Hyde)
Point Place, Wisconsin
January 15, 1980; Tuesday
9:08 AM
Forman Kitchen
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It was a rainy day in Point place and Red, Mrs. Forman, Forman, and Hyde all looked extremely odd there in the kitchen table.
Hyde finished his breakfast, still feeling as if he wanted to hurl. To be honest, he really wasn't in the mood for food. Since the first bite he had just thirty minutes ago, he felt sick to his stomach. However, he didn't have the heart to tell that to Mrs. Forman. She had gotten up extra early that morning to prepare the very best breakfast for Hyde. She wanted it to be "the best breakfast (he'd) ever had".
Hyde felt himself smirking, but then growing a little upset at the same time. Something tickled at his throat and he cleared his throat, trying to get rid of it. Now's not the time, he told himself. You can't let Mrs. Forman see you like this, man! Be tough!
Hyde took his last sip of his juice. "Thanks for breakfast, Mrs. Forman." He didn't dare look at her in the eye. He was too afraid to. So, he took his plate and walked over to the sink.
Mrs. Forman gave a little sniffle and Red whispered something to her. Hyde couldn't hear what he said, but he had a guess. He pretended as if he was oblivious and began to wash the dishes, making sure his head was down and his eyes were no where near looking at his adoptive parents.
Red cleared his throat and got up from his seat. "So…you got all your things packed?"
Hyde nodded, still not making eye contact. "Yeah. It's already loaded up in my El Camino. All I have is a bag that I left downstairs." He hurried off to finish those damn dishes. He had a guess what was going to happen next and he really didn't want to be there when it happened..
Red stood right next to Hyde, looking very uncomfortable himself. "So…uh…when do you…leave?"
Hyde began to rinse as fast as he could, still avoiding Red's eyes. "Uh…in a couple of minutes. I want to avoid as much traffic as possible." Lie. You just want to get out of there before--
Kitty let out a loud cry.
That.
Hyde cringed at the sound and felt lower than dirt. Dammit! However, he still did not raise his eyes. He refused because he knew that if he did…he too would break.
"Kitty." Red tried to soothe his wife. He walked over to her on the table.
Mrs. Forman continued to cry, tears spilling out of her. "I just…I can't believe my baby is leaving!" Her tears came harder down.
Forman, looked at her with puppy eyes. "Your baby? Mom--I'm your baby!"
Mrs. Forman gave him a death look. "Oh, you had your tears when you left for Africa, let Steven have his!" She sobbed.
Thankfully, Hyde finished. "Um…I'm gonna go get my bag."
As he left, Kitty's crying came down harder.
Hyde cringed and hurried off to his room.
He hated doing this to Mrs. Forman. He knew he was hurting her by leaving, but he just knew he had to do it. From the moment that he found out the reason for his actions last year, he knew he had to leave. He had to leave because he had to find out who he used to be. And something told him that if he stayed there in Point Place, he would only get worse. Plus, everything about this stupid town reminded him of her. Every street, every tree, every woodsy area…. God, how he wanted to be with her again. To hold her, to kiss her, to breathe in her scent. He wanted to just get in that El Camino and drive directly to Pittsburgh and ask for forgiveness. Beg for her to give him another chance.
The knot on his throat came back to him again. He forced it back.
No, he told himself. You're not going anywhere near her. You're gonna get your butt in that car and drive until you run outta gas. Then, you're gonna stay there until you get all your shit together. You're not gonna do this to Jackie again. This next time that she gives you another chance--well, that's if she gives you another chance--you won't ruin it like the other two times.
And he was dead serious. After that night a week ago, Hyde came to the conclusion that he was going to get Jackie back. And the only way he knew he was going to be able to get her back was if he was ready to give himself up to her. But before he could do that, he needed to do this. Alone.
Hyde turned and got his last bag and placed it over his shoulder. Then, he heard something drop on the floor. He turned and found that it had been his wallet. It was lying flat on the floor, opened and everything that was in it was now all over the floor. He bent over and picked it up. He placed everything inside the wallet again. When he thought he had picked up everything, he saw something on the floor. It looked like a piece of paper.
He picked that up too and turned it over. There, was a beautiful brunette with green and blue eyes smiling at him. Her hair was down and wild. It was a copy of her senior picture. A smile appeared on his face as he remembered.
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Forman, Donna, Kelso, Fez, and Hyde were all sitting on their usual spots in front of the TV.
Hyde made a face at the image in front of him. "Change it, Forman."
Forman, arm around Donna, stared at the TV with a grossed out look on his face. "Make Kelso change it."
Hyde didn't take his eyes off of the TV. "Kelso, change it."
Kelso pouted. "No. Get Jugs here to change it," he said as he motioned to Donna.
Donna, who was sitting right next to Kelso, slapped him. "Dillhole!"
Kelso winced and rubbed his arm. "Ow, Donna! Fine!" he said angrily. Then turned to his foreign friend. "Fez, you change it."
Fez uncrossed his arms and began to whine. "Ahhhh! But I'm finally comfortable." His lip gave a little pout.
Hyde was now getting more than annoyed with the image on the damn screen. "Fez, change the damn channel before I throw something at it."
He meant it too.
Fez stomped his foot and got up from his seat, not happy. He changed the channel.
At that very moment, Jackie came into the room, a big grin spread across her face.
Hyde finally took his eyes off of the TV and turned to her. She looked rather excited about it and Hyde had a suspicion that he didn't want to know.
"Hey, guys." She rushed over to Hyde. "Steven, guess what?" She sat on the arm of the couch with a very excited look on her face.
Hyde turned back to the TV, arms crossed. "No, thanks."
Jackie didn't take it personal and playfully nudged him. "Come on, Steven. Just guess." She was now almost jumping in her seat.
Then, he noticed something that caught his eye. He arched his brow and leaned over to get a better look at what he hoped he was imagining. However, it was not his imagination. Fez was in fact staring at Jackie's ass right now. And he had the perfect view too, seeing that his eye was level to her buns. And he didn't even try to hide it. His whole head was turned towards it and everything!
It bothered the hell out of Hyde. So…he leaned over and socked the little freak. "Keep those perverted eyes to yourself."
"Aiiii!" Fez moaned and pouted, rubbing his arm.
Jackie frowned but once she turned to Fez she saw what Hyde was talking about. She gave Fez a face and slapped him across the head.
Hyde grabbed Jackie by the hips and pulled her down to his lap, his eyes shooting daggers at Fez, who was now rubbing his head. "So, what'd you wanna tell me?"
Jackie again got ecstatic. "I have something for you!"
Hyde gave her a wicked grin. "Is it dirty?"
"Ooooh! I wanna see!" Fez forgot about his pain in an instant.
Jackie ignored him. "It's a picture! Of me!" She took out a picture from her purse, beaming.
"Are you naked in it?" Kelso leaned over from the lawn chair and tried to get a good look at the picture that she was holding.
Hyde gave him a warning look.
Again, Jackie ignored what everyone was saying. She handed it over to him. "Here. I wanted you to be the first one to have it." She handed it to him, leaned over, and gave him a sweet kiss on the lips.
And they were off. All of Hyde's friends were making that "awww!" sound.
Hyde rolled his eyes and got up. "Get bent." He took Jackie by the hand and led them both to the room as all of his friends continued to tease him.
Once they were alone in the room, Jackie smiled sweetly at him. "Do you like it?"
Hyde rolled his eyes and looked down at the picture. He froze. "Wow. You look beautiful," he said in a small whisper.
Jackie's face showed great emotion. "Steven," she said in that voice. That voice that was full of love…for him.
However, this time--unlike all the other times after she his name like that--she did not kiss him. She just stood there, looking at him…loving him even more.
After several moments, he couldn't bare it anymore, so…he took initiative. He leaned in and kissed her lovingly.
-----------
Hyde kept looking at the picture. God, she was beautiful. He had to agree with Fez. She was a goddess. And for a while there…she had been his goddess. Had…. Could have been still if he hadn't been so…Hyde.
---------
It had been rough day for Jackie. She had seen her father in prison and had gotten into a big argument with him.
Jackie had told him that her mother was no where to be found and had told him about the maids threatening to quit if they didn't get their paychecks soon. She also let him know about all the bills that needed to be paid.
Her father had lost it. Told her to stop whining about it and take care of everything. She was a big girl couldn't she fix all these problems by herself?
Hurt filled her and she had run out. Ran directly to the Formans' house--to Hyde.
She had told him everything. She had cried her eyes out and it had taken a long time for Hyde to soothe her. Then, it took even longer for her to finally go to sleep. Hyde had stayed up until she was in deep sleep…and that didn't come about until 4AM.
The next morning, Jackie woke up before Hyde did and she just laid there for a while, just looking at him…the way she always did when she was in deep thought and was trying to figure him out.
He finally awoke and saw her eyes baring down on him. "What?" he said in a grudged tone.
She looked at him with a slight frown. "When was the first time that your dad walked out on you, Steven?"
Hyde became fully awake at that. "What?"
"How old were you when Bud first walked in on you?" Her eyes contained sadness as she looked at her boyfriend.
She needed to know. She wanted to know him. Wanted to find out everything about him. Get the truth of his life.
Hyde shrugged and became Zen. "3 or 4. Can't remember."
Jackie's eyes got a little teary. "Were you scared?"
Hyde sat up. This was getting very uncomfortable for him. "Can't remember. I was too young."
Jackie sat up with him. "Did you cry?"
Hyde shifted in the cot, getting more tense by the minute. "Can't remember." He got up from the cot.
Jackie did the same. "What did your mom say when you asked her about why he left?"
Hyde began to change for the day…in a hurry. "Can't remember." He needed to get out of there…fast.
Jackie, however, wasn't getting the clue. She wanted to know. He never talked to her about his past…well, not really. He just gave her the basic info most of the time but would never go into his feelings. "How do you not--"
Hyde had had it. He turned around and stopped her. "That's enough, Jackie. I don't wanna talk about it." With that, he put on his t-shirt and headed up stairs.
She stood there, extremely hurt. After the night before, she had been sure that he would let her in at least a little. But, she guessed she had to give it a bit more time.
-----------
Hyde swallowed, hard.
"I stripped myself when I was with you. And I loved you even more after it because I saw how none of the things that I said made you turn around and walk out." Jackie's voice was ringing in his ears.
If only he had stripped himself as well. If only he would have let her in that first time. Or…that one other time that she had needed him to.
-----------
Jackie had gotten into an argument with her mother…again. It seemed as if ever since she showed up and Jackie decided to move back in with her, that's all they seemed to be doing…fighting.
However, this time had been the roughest of all the nights with her mother. They had argued about how they were having to sell more property, had to cut back on expenses, and…about Hyde. Pam Burkhart was beginning to have second thoughts about Hyde. After a few women had confronted her and told her all the tales of Steven J Hyde, Pam believed that he was just not good enough for her daughter. That had gotten a rise out of her daughter and the two spat words to each other. However, the one hurt most had been Jackie.
Pam kept throwing in how Jackie always seemed to make mistakes. Like that time that she had wanted to be a gymnast. She had nearly broken her foot in the first hour of her lessons. Or like that time that had lost her footing during her 6th grade Cheerleading Contest and it had cost them the trophy. Oh, how her mother was never able to let that go. Or when Jackie had used acting as her talent during the Little Miss Wisconsin Pageant and how she had lost because of it.
The words had been too much for Jackie to handle anymore. So, she took her purse and ran off and went straight to Hyde, again.
She told him everything that her mother had said to her. She had never admitted to Hyde how her mother used to push down her self-esteem when she was younger. Had never mentioned to him that the reason why she was always so active in school was because it was always an excuse not to be home.
And he was there. He gave her his shoulder, his warmth, and his love. He brushed away her tears and stayed by her side all night in that little cot.
The next day, they were alone in the basement and Jackie couldn't stop looking at her boyfriend, frowning.
"What?" he hated when she looked at him like that. Made him feel uncomfortable while he sat there on his chair and watched TV.
Jackie somewhat hesitated. She had only attempted this a few other times before and it always ended the same--him walking out. However, she felt as if this time was different. Last night had been different.
She took a deep breath. "How old were you when your mom began to bring other men into your house?"
Hyde's muscles tensed a little. He swallowed, hard and shrugged. "Don't know."
Jackie tried to have patience. "Well, how old do you think you were?"
Hyde didn't take his eyes off of the TV and looked annoyed. "Got no clue." He wished she'd stop already.
Jackie then got a little annoyed herself. "Well, can you think--"
Hyde finally turned to her, pissed. "Jackie, why the hell does it matter? It happened a long time ago."
"But I think you need to let it out. If you don't then--"
Hyde got up from his chair, more bothered and pissed than before. "Jackie, I'm not gonna spill all my guts out like some sort of wuss, alright? I don't wanna whine about something that happened to me a long time ago. It's stupid."
She looked away from her, feeling as if someone had just stabbed her in the heart. Was that what he thought of her? Because she had done all that to him. She had spilled all her guts out and had let out everything that had happened to her in her past. Did he really believe that she was a wuss and stupid? That she was whiny? For a while there she had thought that he actually cared.
She slowly stood up, trying to fight back the tears and avoiding his eyes. She didn't want to be there right now.
The moment he said it, he regretted it. A great shot of pain went directly into his chest as he saw how he had hurt her with those idiotic words. God, Red was right. He was a dumbass when it came to relationship stuff.
When she got up and was ready to leave, he immediately stepped up to her and grabbed her arm, holding her back. He didn't want to let her go. "Jackie--"
A silent tear fell and she cringed at the touch. She didn't want him near her right now. "Steven, let me go."
He felt like kicking himself. He hated hearing her voice sound so hurt. And hated it even more that it was him that had caused it. Why couldn't he do this right? "Jackie, I'm sorry. I didn't mean--"
She fought another tear from coming down. "You don't need to explain, Steven. Really. I'm just glad I finally know how you feel whenever I come to you for help. It's ok. Next time I'll just go to Donna." She tried to pull away.
However, Hyde was not about to let her leave. "Jackie, please. Look at me."
Jackie tried to fight it. She knew what would happen if she turned. This always happened whenever he said something stupid. It always had the same results.
"Jackie…"
She had no control of her body. None whatsoever. Before she knew it, she had turned and his hands were on both sides of her face.
He looked deep into those eyes. "Sorry. I didn't mean it."
Jackie let out a sigh. She would always forgive him. Always….
He took a strand of hair from her face and tugged it behind her ear. "Forgive me?"
She swallowed hard and nodded slowly.
He gave her a sincere smile and leaned over. "Thank you." He kissed her sweetly.
She let him take her into his arms and placed her head onto his shoulder.
"I just don't like talking about my past," he admitted.
Jackie felt the tears coming back again. "Why?" she asked pleadingly. She needed to know how badly his past was. Craved for him to share that with her. Wanted him to let her in all the way. Or else…. She refused to finish that thought.
Hyde took a deep breath. "I just…I--I'm just…not ready."
Jackie pulled away from him and looked at him straight in the eye. "When, then?" She knew she sounded desperate, but she didn't care. She wanted him to know how hurtful this was to her.
Hyde hesitated to find the right words to say. He didn't want to hurt her again without thinking first before he opened his damn mouth. "I don't know."
Tears filled her eyes. That was always his answer. When was he going to change it? When, dammit?!
He knew he was hurting her, but he didn't mean to. "Lets just…forget this, ok? There's no use in pushing it." He prayed that she would give in.
And of course, she nodded and agreed. She always seemed to be the one to agree.
He gave her another kiss then took her hand. "Wanna go to The Hub? Buy you something shiny?" He cracked a small grin, trying to make her smile as well.
She just nodded and allowed him to lead her out of the room, not saying a thing.
----------
Hyde sat down, not able to stand up anymore. More memories were coming back--bad ones--and he couldn't stop them.
God, why didn't he give more in the relationship? Why?!
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It was the night of the day he had missed her graduation party. She was still pissed at him as she stalked him into his room.
Hyde dropped onto his cot, rolling his eyes at her. "Jackie, I told you that I got a flat and I couldn't make it." He grabbed a magazine from his dresser and began to browse through it.
Jackie grabbed it from his hands and threw it on the floor.
Hyde looked up at her, frowning. "Why the hell did you do that for?"
Jackie placed her hands on her hips and gave him a look that could kill. "And why the hell can't you ever be truthful with me?!"
Hyde got up and faced her. "What the hell are you talking about? I haven't lied to you."
Jackie grunted. "Ugh! That's not what I mean, Steven! I'm talking about how, just like today, you didn't talk to me. You didn't explain the reason as to why you didn't want to go to my party! And why you weren't willing to make such a small sacrifice for me! I mean, is it that hard to communicate with me?!"
Hyde hated when Jackie got all girlie like this. It bugged him when she wanted him with her all the damn time. And lately it was bugging him more than usual. "Jackie, I'm not a girl alright? You're not in a relationship with Fez. I don't talk about my feelings and you know it. It's just not me."
Her jaw was clenched and she looked ready to explode. "Well, it's just not me to not communicate. And lately the communication between us has not been very good. We need to--"
"Why can't you just ever be happy and just enjoy the moment? Why do you always wan to talk?"
Jackie's eyes grew tears. "Well, sorry for wanting to talk to my boyfriend, Steven. And sorry for wanting him to be with me today of all days--when I really needed him."
Hyde saw the pain in her eyes and kicked himself for not noticing a lot earlier. He suddenly grew worried. "What happened?"
Jackie was angry and wanted him to feel guilty. "Oh, nothing. Just my mother decided to not show up either and I didn't even get a call from my father to congratulate me. Also, I just found out that one of the maids has been stealing from us--especially from me. She took my Aunt Dianne's bracelet."
Hyde's stomach suddenly didn't feel so good. "Dianne? The one that died of cancer when you were 12?"
Jackie's eyes filled with tears. "Yeah. The one person that I always felt loved me from my family. The reason that introduced me to dance."
Hyde knew who Dianne was perfectly well. He remembered hearing that Aunt Dianne was the one that always went to Jackie's Parent/Teacher Meetings. And he knew how much Jackie loved that bracelet. "When did she steal it?"
"Last week."
Hyde felt lower than dirt. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Jackie gave him a look. "I had wanted to tell you that day that I suspected her of stealing it, but you just brushed me away and decided to go hang out with your friends instead. You didn't even notice how upset I was that day. Plus, when was the last time that you asked me how my day had been?"
Hyde looked down, feeling lower within every second.
Jackie shook her head and began to walk out.
Hyde reached out and grabbed her. "Jackie--"
Jackie pulled away. "Not this time, Steven." She walked off, not looking back.
That had been the first of how many arguments would end. Jackie no longer gave in to his hugs and kisses…not anymore.
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Hyde looked around. Everything here reminded him of her. Everything. In this room. In this house. Hell, that whole damn town! That's why he needed to get out. He couldn't get his head straight with Jackie's essence being this close to him.
He got back up again and grabbed his bag. He walked out of the room and turned off the lights for the very last time. And as he shut the door, an image of Jackie wearing his Led Zeppelin t-shirt as she laid there in that cot with him slowly faded away.
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"Be safe, sweety." Mrs. Forman leaned in and gave him a small kiss on the cheek.
They were all standing in the kitchen because it was raining cats and dogs outside.
She wiped away her lipstick from his cheek. "And be sure to call every week, ok?" Tears were rolling down her own cheeks.
Hyde finally met her eyes for the very first time in days. He needed to tell her before he left. "Thank you, Mrs. Forman."
"For what, sweety?"
"For…everything. For, uh---for being, uh…like…a mom for me these last few years," he said this kind of low, but he knew she heard him.
She gave him one of her smiles and gave him a tight hug.
Red had to pull her away. "Now, now Kitty. Let the boy breathe and go. He needs to get that butt on the road before he gets caught in traffic." He turned to Hyde and hesitated a little bit. "Steven, I, uh. I know that uh--that it's not much, but…." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a 50. He handed it to him. "Here you go. Just in case."
Before Hyde could protest, Red lifted his hand and stopped him. "Steven," he warned.
Hyde nodded. He knew that if he argued with Red, he'd lose. "Thank you, sir."
Red gave him a smile and finally gave in. He leaned over and pulled Hyde into a hug. "Be good, son. And don't worry. I know you'll get her back," he whispered so only Hyde could hear.
Hyde hugged Red back, tightly. "Thanks, Red. For everything."
Red nodded and finally pulled away, looking down because he was close to tears. "Now get the hell outta here."
Hyde smirked and nodded. He turned to his friends and they all shared a group hug. Hyde tried to shake the feeling of incompleteness from him. The hug just didn't feel right with only 5 people. He pulled away, still trying to shake off that feeling.
"Do you have any idea where you're going?" asked Donna.
Hyde shrugged. "Nope. I'm stopping when I feel like it."
"But be sure to call like every day, man," said Forman.
Hyde nodded. "Yeah, I will."
"Aw! The mustache man is leaving," Fez said as he tickled Hyde's mustache, that he still had not shaven.
Hyde didn't even punch Fez's hands away this time, like he regularly did. He just smiled.
"Just be sure not to marry any more strippers this time," Kelso said as he laughed.
Silence fell throughout the entire room.
Red and Mrs. Forman were looking at Kelso as if they were about to kill him.
Forman, Donna, and Fez hit Kelso upside the head at the same time.
"Ow!" Kelso whined. "What'd I do?! Damn!"
Hyde cleared his throat, wanting to change the subject and fast. He gave all his friends a goodbye before heading over to his car.
They all wished him good luck and stood on the porch as they watched him leave.
It didn't take long for Hyde to get out of Point Place, since it was so damn small. Hyde took a deep breath once he reached the open fields. He looked up and saw that very slowly, the rain was stopping. It was still very dark and looked gloomy, but he knew that the weather was getting better…it just needed a little more time to clear up.
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Jackie stared out of her window. It was raining like cats and dogs in Pittsburgh too, but it didn't look as bad as it did where Hyde was. Jackie didn't know this.
She too took a deep breath. For the past several days she had tried to forget everything that she left in Point Place. And little by little, she was healing. She didn't know when she would be 100 better, but she did know that she was going to reach that goal.
Tammy and Rita, Jackie's roommates were getting ready to head out.
Tammy turned to Jackie. "We're going to Dee Dee's to get a cup of coffee with a couple of more friends, wanna come?"
Jackie turned to her and thought for a while. "Sure." She took her purse and began to walk out of the dormitory with Tammy.
Tammy wrapped her arm around Jackie's shoulder. "You're gonna love this coffee shop, Jacqueline."
Rita swung her arm around Jackie as well.
Jackie was still getting used to that name. But she would eventually learn how to get used to it. It was, after all, the new her. She had already vowed to leave Jackie behind in Point Place and she wasn't about to back up now.
Jackie forced a smile and wrapped her arms around Tammy's and Rita's waists. New friends. New places. She was beginning her new life.
Ok, I know, I know. More flashbacks, but just like before, I HAD to!!! But I hope you enjoyed it!!! REVIEW PLEASE! I MAY write more by this Monday if I get the inspiration like I did this time!!!
OK, SO CHAPTER 4: "Somebody's Me" by Enrique Iglesias (ok, i personally don't like him but i REALLy like this song!)
PREVIEW of next chapter: There's going to be a visit to Point Place!!!!
