I wrote this chapter before I started this fanfic, happy that it's finally out! Whoot! After chapter 5, I'll have no idea what to write about...-sobs-

Disclaimer: L, take it away!

L: There's an one hundred percent chance that Ayumi-san doesn't own Death Note.

Raito: So get off her damn back, bitches!

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Damn it all...Raito sat up in bed and glared at the other person occuping the other half of it. That rare time that L had let himself sleep for once has come again, and being the selfish bastard that he was, he had stolen most of the sheets. Raito shivered, rubbing his hands up and down his arms, hoping that the friction would warm him up the slightest fraction of an amount more. Why the hell is it so damn cold in here?!

He glanced at the large bowl of pale yellow ice cream sitting on the floor next to the bed, only slightly melted. He suddenly remembered L muttering about not wanting his ice cream to melt and cursed under his breath.

Raito poked L's shoulder. "Ryuuzaki, get up, I have to go to the bathroom." He muttered, poking him harder. No response. Raito sighed in annoyance, poking his finger into L's shoulder blade. "Wake up dammit, I have to pee!"

L shifted slightly and wrapped the blankets tighter around himself. "Mmmuffa..." He mumbled, his lips parting slightly to allow a considerable amount of drool to slip out and onto his pillow. Raito's nose wrinkled in disgust. "Alright, Ryuuzaki, off yer ass. Now!" He bapped the top of L's head for emphasis.

L automatically sat up, glared groggily at him and bitchslapped him across the face. "I would highly appreciate it if Raito-kun would shut his damn mouth for once and let me sleep!" And with that, L fell back onto his saliva-soaked pillow and went back to sleep.

Raito was in shock, as he touched his tinged pink cheek in a daze. How dare he...!! He glared at L's sleeping form. Nobody crosses Raito Yagami and gets away with it. He carefully climbed out of bed, slowly enough to not make the chain clang together. He got off the bed and smirked maliciously at the bowl of ice cream, getting an extremely evil idae.

Heh. This is what you get for not letting me piss when I want to. He thought with an evil chuckle, and started pulling down the zipper of his pants.

-fangirl squeal-

Later, after the Raito fangirl regained her composure after imagining Raito peeing into a bowl of ice cream...

Raito was now in an extremely good mood. Not only was he getting his revenge, L had treated him to a decent breakfast this time, letting him make his own pancakes. L had even added some chocolate chips to it. And even though Raito didn't really like sweets, it was some damn good chocolate. He forked another bite of pancake into his mouth while trying hard not to laugh while L had his ice cream. He wanted to wait until L was all done before filling him in.

When L had the last spoonful in his mouth, Raito burst out laughing. Puzzled, L tilted his head in questioning, making L fangirls squee. "Does Raito-kun find something amusing about his breakfast?"

"Haha, I can't believe you actually ate it! I pissed in that, and you ate it!" Raito blurted out, clutching his sides in slight pain as he laughed.

L blinked slowly, and looked at his empty bowl, the corners of his lips pulling up in a faint smile. "Ah...yes, I had predicted that Raito-kun would be infuriated in me and had urinated in my ice cream, due to the smell and the fact that it was two point five percent more yellow then before. Thus, I retrieved fresh ice cream and snuck rabbit feces into Raito-kun's pancakes." He smiled proudly. "Oh, and the chance that Raito-kun is Kira has gone up by seventeen percent."

Raito didn't hear him anymore. His caramel-colored eyes had widened for more then humanly possible, making them look even more like a doe's then usual, his face paling into a sickly, green complexion, his mouth dropping open. The half chewed piece of pancake fell from his agape mouth, falling onto his plate with a wet 'thump'. "Ryuuzaki...you didn't..." He croaked weakly.

L just sat there looking immensely pleased with himself.

Raito glanced at the sad lump of pancake he had been eating thirty seconds ago. Indeed, that was rabbit poop in there. Raito let out a loud, bloodcurdling, high pitched and extremely girly shriek that lasted about forty four seconds before his eyes rolled up into his head and he fell sideways off his chair in a dead faint. L had about thirty milliseconds to smirk until the chain pulled him down also, making him crash into the floor.

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Finally done! Manga-chan, who this chapter is dedicated too, kept distracting me with perversions! Sheesh...anyway, review replies!

SapphireElric- Sounds fun!

A Candle Lit For The Dead- Wow, morbid name XD; I'm bashing L?? o.o Oh, I didn't know that...I love L, just not as much as Raito...maybe I'm subconsciously doing it cuz I'm a Kira follower...

Ling-Ling1567- Yes, wow XD

naito-kei- XD; I love you too? Raito is egotistical -nods- I mean, did you see the way he sits? -hearts-

Skyler25- Oh yes, the bond between rivaling fangirls is a beautiful thing, isn't it? I look forward to having loud, immature "RAITO IS MINE, BETCH" fights with you in the future, lol. XD This story isn't yaoi -blinks- I just like making fun of the pairing cuz it makes no sense to me XD; Ah yes, his perfect ass...

Synonymous Brain- X3 I'll make updates quicker, I keep getting lazy...

julstimes2- Yay, Spazzy!Raito!

Fweee!- Fwee equals chibi!Ed pelvic thrusting with maracas XD; Reference to Poup, yay! XD; just had to point that out...

InuyashaLuver1224- As I said before, Raito sounds sexier then Light -coughs-

Eternaldeath13- Also a morbid name...I like it though X3 Yay, another fan of the rainbow bitch line!

InsaneGirL Of The Akatsuki- GAH NO YAOI DX

Kurai-Kyuuketsuki- The best crack? Why, I'm honored that you think so -eyes sparkle-

MrsEdwardElric47- X3 I guessed on that, of course, I can't tell the difference between both buttcheeks, they're both equally perfect...-ahem-

Yami ni Hikaru- XD If you think he can't stand losing now, wait until chapter five!

Okay, that's it, time to go do my homework! Ahahaha...not...