Memory VII:
Harry found himself in Professor McGonagall's quarters. She was sitting at her desk, sealing a letter with a sigh and handing the envelope to her owl.
Professor Dumbledore was sitting on the other side of her desk patiently waiting for her to finish the task.
'Albus, I have stopped counting the times I have to resend this letter! I wonder whether Harry will ever get his invitation to Hogwarts!'
'I am sure you will find a way, Minerva.' Professor Dumbledore answered with a smile.
She just rolled her eyes at him.
'I will, Albus. And I will deliver it myself if I have to! These awful people will be better off though I have do not have to appear on their doorstep. They are just terrible and I still cannot believe we had to leave Harry with them.'
Professor McGonagall was giving her colleague an angry look and Harry thought by the looks of both of them that this dispute was not a new one. And right…
'Minerva, we have talked about this so many times now. I know it is not the best choice but it is the only choice we had at the time. Harry needs the blood protection and this is, therefore, the only safe place for him.'
'You have your point of view and I still have mine.' Professor McGonagall was definitely not in a good mood and Harry briefly wondered whether anybody but his Head of House would dare to speak to Professor Dumbledore like this.
'Although you asked me not to interfere I have visited Harry a few times – at least once a year to be honest. These people treat him horribly and I think he has suffered enough already in his young life. He should have a real family not such parsimonious, fatuous, ignorant…'
'Minerva!' Professor Dumbledore stopped her before she would completely lose it in her anger.
'We will send Hagrid to deliver the letter if it becomes necessary. You can soon have an eye on Harry once he gets to Hogwarts.'
'Yeah, sure. I will be his teacher in Transfiguration but nothing more. I cannot spoil him like I promised Lily to do. I cannot be close to him, hold him, laugh with him, take his pain away – and I hate myself for giving in to your decision!'
She was now yelling at Professor Dumbledore, tears forming in her eyes.
Harry thought Professor Dumbledore would probably reprimand her but very unexpectedly he got up and pulled Professor McGonagall in a tight embrace. His Head of House first stiffened but soon lost her composure and started to cry.
'I am sorry, Minerva. I really am.' Dumbledore whispered soothingly.
'He will hate me once he finds out. As his godmother I made a vow to protect him after all and I let him down. I am just as much of a traitor as Sirius' she mumbled into the Head Master's shoulders.
Professor Dumbledore pushed her away at arm's length and made her look at him.
'Don't be silly. You could have never betrayed Lily and James. And you could not have protected Harry in the way he is protected now. Besides, you have made almost as many enemies among the Death Eaters as I have. I am sure Lord Voldemort will be back and then you should not be related to Harry. I know this is hard on you but it will be the best for Harry. You will find other ways to be there for him.'
Professor McGonagall walked away from him towards the window.
'Please leave me alone now, Albus. I will be there for dinner but I have some essays to correct.' Her voice was small but demanding.
Professor Dumbledore shot her another worried look but left her quarter.
Present:
Harry's thoughts and feelings were in turmoil. Professor McGonagall was his godmother! And she never even gave a hint. She had let him live with the Dursleys although she knew how dreadful life with them was. Why hadn't she fought harder for him?
Harry felt anger rise in him. He needed to get out of the office and get some fresh air. Since he was almost running he did not even notice that Professor Dumbledore was approaching his office. He slowed down once he was outside. He furiously blinked away some tears and kicked a stone in the courtyard.
A calming hand was put on his shoulder. 'Harry, I think I know which memory you have just seen.' Professor Dumbledore turned him around to face him. 'Please look at me, Harry. I know you are angry and upset right now. And you might be right but please have in mind that we all acted upon decisions which we thought would assure your safety.'
'I would have needed her – or basically anybody!' Harry yelled.
'I realise that and maybe it was wrong to not bear in mind your emotional well being as well. I apologize for that and I ask you not to blame Professor McGonagall. She was fighting hard for you, believe me. And she still is.'
'Why do you show me these memories now? I am still not safe without staying at the Dursleys'. Why doing all of this now?'
'Because Sirius is dead and you need somebody to rely on besides Ron and Hermione. And because I almost lost my dearest friend and it I am still shaken just by the thought of not having Minerva around anymore, Harry. She deserves the best and yet she had to suffer so much throughout all these years. Partly or even mostly because she trusted me and my convictions all the time.'
Harry had to process everything and was quiet for some time. He was shocked that it obviously had been a close call for his teacher – he had not realised that the attack was this bad. Then suddenly a picture of a cat came to his mind – visiting every summer and staying close to Harry to offer consolidation. He felt ashamed but still could not let go of his anger completely.
'Harry, will you do me a favour and please go through all other memories as well? It will give you a good idea of how important you are to Professor McGonagall. Please decide afterwards how you want to deal with this knowledge.' Professor Dumbledore's voice had a pleading tone which surprised Harry.
'Alright. I will continue. And please give Professor McGonagall my best anyway next time you see her.'
With that, Harry left his Headmaster in the courtyard and went back to his office before he could think about it twice.
Memory VIII:
Harry found himself in a nicely decorated room. There was a party in full swing – people were dancing, drinking, laughing, eating and chatting. He had to hold is breath for a second – never had he seen Professor McGonagall look so beautiful. She wore a very elegant green dress which showed her slim body. Her hair was up but not in the usual tight bun but really nicely done. Her eyes were shining with joy. Professor Dumbledore watched his companion proudly when she approached the most important people of the day.
'Lily, James! Congratulations. I am so happy for both of you!' Professor McGonagall hugged the freshly wedded couple.
'You look absolutely stunning, Lily.'
'Thank you, Minerva' his mother beamed at her.
'James, I hope you do take good care of your lovely wife.' She smiled at his father.
'I intend to make her happy, Minerva. Don't worry.' James' eyes were twinkling.
'You better do my boy – otherwise you will get to know me for real.'
'You mean you can be even more of a pest than you have been as a teacher?' James Potter asked jokingly.
'Just try me!' Professor McGonagall replied with a laugh.
'If you excuse me for a moment – I have to speak to Sirius and see how we can drive you mad again.'
His mother and his teacher were alone within the crowd. Lily seemed a bit shy all of a sudden.
'Minerva, I want to thank you for being there for me whenever I need you. To me you are the mother I always dreamed of. You cannot start to know how important it is for me that you are here with us tonight. My own parents and my sister denied me their respect even on this important day.' Harry was shocked to see his mother close to tears at this happy occasion.
Professor McGonagall seemed to be upset as well. 'Oh Lily. I am so sorry. I will never understand how they cannot accept you how you are. You are such a wonderful person – every mother should be proud to have such a daughter. I feel honoured that you would see me as a substitute.' She pulled his mother in a tight embrace. Then she wiped off Lily's tears and hers as well. She smiled encouragingly at her former student.
'Let's be happy tonight. You should enjoy the party – James drove me mad as a student but I love him for making you happy. You are great together. Come on, let's get this gentlemen to dance!'
She laughed at his mother and pulled her to the others.
Present:
Harry sat very still for some minutes. He had just seen his parents' wedding day – what an amazing gift. They had been so happy together, such a perfect fit.
He was glad that his Professor had been such a solid rock for his mother. How dare her parents and aunt Petunia not had attended to her wedding. They must have been cruel and ignorant towards his mother. In a way he was now glad, that he never got to know his grandparents. Aunt Petunia had been enough of a nightmare. His poor mother!
He wondered how she had become this close with Professor McGonagall. To him she never appeared to be a person who was very open or easily approachable. Somehow his mother had found a way though to cross that barrier and establish an extremely good relationship with her former teacher. He could only think of Hermione when trying the impossible.
A little lighthearted from what he had just seen he eagerly grabbed the next phial.
Author's note: I know I have used the idea of Minerva being Harry's godmother already in my first story – I simply like the idea and feel that she should have played a more significant role in Harry's life. As for the memories I still have a few ideas but will always be grateful for your input. Please let me know if you enjoy the story or if you wish for any major changes/adjustments.
Those who have reviewed already – many thanks! It always helps to go on and I will take your input onboard.
