Fears and Fancies
Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds. Really!
' Loneliness is about the scariest thing out there ' Joss Whedon
Three months earlier.
Another Dream
The toddler wandered into the living room, his big hazel eyes looking around 'til he found the person he was looking for. The young man lay on the couch. His curly hair was shorter now. He had a blanket drawn up to his chin; he smiled at the toddler. Another man sat in an easy chair, a beer in his hand. The baby toddled over to where the man lay and shoved a huge book at him, "Read me a story," he ordered in a baby voice.
"He's tired Spencer," said the man in the chair. "Get mommy to read to you."
"Mommy's sleeping," said the toddler.
The man on the couch sat up, "It's ok Will, I don't mind." The toddler smiled and climbed onto the man's lap and snuggled close.
The man opened the book, "Ah Charles Dickens, my favourite." He began to read.
"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times....
Reid awoke with a start, smiling as he remembered the dream. He felt something wet on his face; it was a tear.
Fear
Reid lay on the table in the Doctors exam room. He couldn't stop shivering. He was wearing nothing but a paper gown and his mismatched socks. He didn't know if he was shaking from the cold or from fear. He concluded it was probably a bit of both. 'What the hell is taking this guy so long,' thought Reid. Reid agonized over making this appointment but his fear won out over his sense of denial. Those lumps he had found last month were even larger. Better to get them checked out than worry. It was probably nothing, he told himself, some kind of bug or something. He'd get a script and that would be that.
The doctor finally entered the room and introduced himself. "Hello Spencer, I'm Doctor Strange." Reid had to suppress a smile at the name. The doctor looked down at the very slim file he had in his hand. "It says here, you work for the FBI, do they not have their own medical personnel?"
"Yes. But I felt the need for a bit of privacy in this matter." 'I am terrified I might be sick and they'll find out.'
"Alright then, it says here you have some lumps that are worrying you. Let's check these out. "The doctor donned a pair of gloves. He pulled the paper gown down to Reid's waist. First he felt Reid's neck and then began pressing under the arms and across his chest, much harder than Spencer would have. He moved the gown back up and lifted the other end exposing Reid's crotch.
"Spread your legs a little bit please." Reid swallowed and closed his eyes. This was so embarrassing and he felt ashamed of his embarrassment. He was a grown man after all. The doctor continued to press and prod around the groin area. Reid gave a slight yelp as the doctor pressed a little too hard. He opened his eyes and tried to read the face of the man examining him. The physician was frowning.
'Not a good sign.' Reid thought.
"Ok Spencer, just a couple of questions." He pulled the gown back down and removed his gloves. "Have you lost any weight lately?
"I don't know, I never weigh myself, maybe a little." He was telling the truth.
The doctor eyed his slim torso. "Ok, do you have any loss of energy, are you tired a lot?"
"Mmm, a little I guess. I work long hours sometimes."
"Any other unusual things."
"I have very itchy skin; my mom always told me I have very dry skin." He wondered why he felt the need to share that.
The doctor stood and smiled at him. "You can get dressed now Spencer, and then meet me in my office. We'll talk."
&&&&&&&&&
Present day
Derek Morgan had just opened a bottle of his very best chardonnay. He poured a glass and handed it to the beautiful woman sitting on his couch. She graced him with her best come hither smile. Morgan was about to pour himself a glass when he felt his cell phone go off. 'Great. I hope it's not a case.' He thought. He looked at the screen and saw it was Reid calling. 'Strange, he never calls me on a Saturday' "Hello Morgan here." He was surprised that the voice on the other end was not Reid.
"Is this Derek Morgan?" It was a hard masculine voice that spoke.
"Eh, yes it is. Who is this?"
"Hi, this is Bob McAlistair, I run Bobbies Tavern, I've got a friend of yours here that's drunk out of his mind. He started a fight with another costumer. I really need someone to pick him up."
At first Morgan thought it was some kind of joke, but his profiler skills told him otherwise. "Tell me where you are and I'll be right there." He got the address and hung up the phone. He looked wistfully at his date. "Sorry baby, duty calls, I gotta go."
Morgan found the tavern fairly easy; it was walking distance from Reid's apartment. He couldn't believe what he saw when he got there. A large bartender was trying to reason with an even larger patron with a scraggily beard and tattoos on every exposed body part. Reid was lying prone on a pool table with a silly grin on his face, sporting what looked like to be the beginning of a black eye.
He approached the bartender. "Hey man, what's going on?"
"Are you Morgan?" Derek nodded "Your name was on his speed dial." He pointed to Reid.
This time the large bearded man spoke. "Your friend's an asshole buddy, he's lucky I didn't rip his head off. He asked me what it was like to be stupid." Derek cringed and looked over at Reid. He wanted to get the both of them out of there with as little fuss as possible. He decided to go the charming route.
"Hey man, I apologize for my friend, see, he's a bit simple and can't hold his drink. How about I buy you and your friend here a couple rounds and we'll forget it." Derek offered up his best friendly smile and a twenty dollar bill. 'Reid so owes me'
The burly man really didn't want to let it go, but the temptation of the twenty was too much, "Ok, but I don't want to see his scrawny ass around here again."
Morgan went over to Reid and pulled him off the table. Reid could barely stand, putting his arms around Morgan. Morgan could smell the booze on him, "Reid, what the hell were you thinking?" he whispered.
Reid opened his eyes wide like he was seeing Morgan for the first time, "Dergan! Have you come to party with me?" He let go and staggered over to the burly patron who hadn't taken his eyes off him. He turned to Morgan. "Gorgan, come meet my new friend." He grabbed the large paw of the man and shook it vigorously. Morgans stomach flipped.
Reid pursed his lips, "Goodnight my friend, I just want to say that of all the people that have punched me in the face, and there have been many, your punch was the best." He stood pumping the man's hand with a big goofy smile on his face. Morgan rushed over to him while mouthing, 'He's crazy' at the bar patrons. He grabbed Reid and started to guide him quickly out of the bar.
"C'mon party boy, time to go."
"Party over? Home-time? "
"Yup, I'm taking you home." Reid pouted, then burst into hysterical giggles as Morgan tried to fold his long limbed friend into his car. 'You so so owe me,' he thought as he belted Reid's seatbelt for the short ride to Reid's apartment.
It took some difficulty but Morgan managed to get Reid into his apartment. He led him directly to his bedroom where Reid dropped like a lead weight onto his bed. Morgan got him a large glass of water and returned. He looked down at his friend and hoisted him up. He put the water glass to his lips and ordered "Drink!" Spencer sloppily did as he was told, then flopped back down again. Morgan sighed and once again pulled him back up.
C'mon man, I'm getting you undressed and then tomorrow when you're sober I'm going to call and yell and scream at you." Reid just smiled and nodded in agreement. "Reid there's something I've got to know, why did you start a fight with that hulk?"
"Because I've never done it before, get in a bar fight that is."
Morgan looked at him, incredulous. "Kid, you mean of all the things you've never done, that's the one you chose?"
"Sure, I didn't have time to get married and have a family." He slurred.
"Reid, stand up. I gotta get these things off." He pulled Reid up. He leaned against Morgan and then started making gagging sounds.
"Oh oh, think I gotta throw up"
"Aw shit! Not on me you don't!" He grabbed Reid and hurriedly pulled him into the bathroom. Spencer made it just in time. Morgan stood behind him and held back his hair. "When I think of all the things I could have been doing tonight," Morgan shook his head.
"Sorry, sorry," Spencer gasped between retches.
Morgan patted him on the back, "S'ok kid, it happens to the best of us." He began feeling a tinge of pity for the boy. After he was done, Morgan wiped his friend's face off and made him rinse his mouth. He hauled him back to the bedroom again where Reid once again collapsed on the bed. Morgan reached down again to pull him up. Spencer grabbed Morgan's t-shirt and pulled his face close.
"Morgan," his eyes wide. "There's something I have to tell you."
Morgan hoped Reid wasn't suddenly going to declare his love for him or something because he'd really had enough surprises for today.
"What is it kid?"
"I think...I think…your eyebrows are really weird," He let go of Morgan and burst into another fit of giggles.
"You wont be laughing tomorrow pretty boy." He said as once again he got Reid into a standing position. He pulled off Reid's jacket. Underneath the jacket he wore a sweater, a dress shirt and then a t shirt. "Holy shit Reid, how long does it take you to get dressed in the morning?" He pulled the sweater vest over his head and started working on the buttons of the shirt. Reid kept swaying; he put Reid's arms around his neck to steady him. Reid rested his head on Morgan's shoulder. He just got the last few buttons undone when he felt Reid's fingers grip his t-shirt
"Derek, Derek...please, help," he whispered in a barely audible voice.
Derek held his friend back and looked into his face. Spencer's expression was different; his eyes were moist and filled with pain and something else, was it fear?
"What is it kid, what's wrong?" Then it was gone. Reid had that big dopey smile on his face again. He leaned into Derek. Finally Morgan pulled Reid's t-shirt off and pushed him down on the bed. He removed his shoes and yanked off his pants. 'Phew, that took forever,' he thought. He looked down at Reid lying on the bed wearing only a pair of dark coloured boxer shorts. His stomach gave a slight lurch. He had never really seen Reid undressed before. What he saw before him was not someone who was just thin, but emaciated. He thought he could probably count every rib on his body. Reid's skin also had a slightly translucent quality, almost a bluish tinge to it. In fact, it seemed there was some kind of ink on him that had been scrubbed off, large x's. He leaned down closer to see what it was when Spencer's eyes opened.
Morgan grabbed the blankets and pulled them over him. Reid mumbled a thanks, turned on his side and curled into the fetal position. Morgan tucked a pillow behind his back, so he wouldn't roll over.
"Morgan?" he said quietly
"Yeah kid?"
"How do you think I will look bald?"
Morgan laughed at this apparent non-sequiter and was about to answer when he noticed Reid was completely out. He stared at Reid's wan face and brushed a bit of hair out of his eyes. Morgan had intended to head straight home, but something made him stay. 'In case the kid pukes again or something ' He told himself.
Derek moved into the living room. He helped himself to a drink and switched on the TV. He took a swig of his scotch. 'Garcia is gonna want to hear about this' Morgan relaxed back into the old sofa with one ear listening for his friend.
Spencer slept a dreamless sleep. By now he knew the face of the man that haunted him.
FIN
AN: Hi, I am not a person with any medical background but I try to research as accurately as I can . Please forgive any inaccuracies or glaring errors I might have in this fiction. Thanks to those who reviewed. It is very kind of you.
