Sirius Black opened his eyes and his hand immediately went to his aching cheek. As the memories of the previous evening slowly arrived he rolled over and groaned.
"What did you do?"
"Marlene! I swear I didn't do a thing! It was James! He enchanted the- OW!" Sirius howled in the pain of Marlene's slap.
"I swear to Circe Black! You marauders don't know when to quit! I am going to my room." And with one last withering glare she stormed off. Sirius held a hand to his cheek and watched her walk away partly in pain, partly admiring her arse.
Around an hour later Sirius decided that it was time to apologise, Marlene MAY kill him if he doesn't. So he climbed up the stairs to the girls' dorms. She wasn't in her room so he opened the bathroom door.
"McKinnon I- Oh Sweet Merlin! MY EYES!"
"Black! Have you never heard of knocking!"
"I didn't think you would be doing that!"
"Oh for Agrippa's sake! I was just shaving my legs! Why are you even here?"
"I wanted to apologise but I think this settles it- OW! AGAIN?!"
"Do you want me to slap you a third time? GET OUT!"
Yes, Sirius did not like that night. He should just go back to sleep. Today would be better. He was suddenly very aware of the fact that his sheets had been ripped off. And that there was a pretty blonde woman standing over him. She raised her wand and the next thing he's up by his ankle in his quaffle boxers.
"What the- McKinnon?!"
"It is exactly 10:30. At 11 I expect you downstairs so we can discuss ground rules."
"Fine but- argh!" Sirius screeched as he hit James bed narrowly missing the floor.
"Oh and nice boxers." Marlene said with a casual wink while leaving. Okay, maybe it won't be Sirius' best day.
xxXXXxx
Marlene sat in the common room thinking and waiting for her temporary roommate. Honestly, even Emmeline spends less time on her hair than him! Finally she hears footsteps from the boys' dormitory.
"Oh McKinnon, Miss me?"
"Bite me Black"
"I usually like to buy you a drink first but sure- OW! Again?" Marlene slapped him round the face leaving a small pink handprint on his left cheek.
"Now sit down so we can discuss our current situation." Sirius obediently sat down glaring at Marlene. Marlene sat down, and then started pacing back and forth.
"I'd say that I didn't have all day… except I kind of do… So what's up with you?"
"We need to discuss ground rules. Ok. Rule one: You shall not enter my bathroom without knocking and vice versa."
"No objections to that one! I'm physically scarred from last night"
"Oh man up! Rule 2: We have to be awake and ready by 10:30 am."
"WHAT! Absolutely not I mean-"
"Do you want me to wake you with 'Levicorpus' every morning?"
"NO!"
"Then stop being a prat and listen to me! Rule 3: All homework MUST be done by Christmas."
"Will you help me?"
"Rule 4: You are not allowed to use more than one cheesy pick up line a day."
"Rule 5: YOU can't slap me more than once a day!"
"Rule 6: YOU can't try and sleep with me!"
"Oh that's just cruel!"
"No It's diplomatic now-" Marlene was cut off by a loud bang from behind Sirius forcing him to yelp with shock (literally yelped, if James saw him then!) and fall on top of Marlene.
"Sirius what the-!"
"Well hello Marlene. Since when am I Sirius?"
"Since we have to be stuck here. It's rule 7: we are temporarily on a first name basis. Now remove your hands from my chest and GET OFF"
"Is miss and sir ready for order of lunch?" came a small voice from behind them.
"Sweet Merlin! It's a houself!"
"Why thank you Sirius, I could not see that for myself!"
"It's time for food sir and miss?"
xxXXXxx
Marlene sat on her bed fuming whilst writing a letter to her best friend lily.
"Hi Lily,
Merry Christmas! Well, to you it may be. I, on the other hand, am trapped in Gryffindor tower with none other than Sirius Black! And this is thanks to your stalker!
Sorry about the downer but if you could have a howler sent to him on my behalf. Enjoy your present!
Marlene xx"
There came a knock at the door. Marlene sighed sent off her letter and opened the door. There for some stupid reason was Black down on one knee.
"Oh Agrippa what now?"
"Marlene I don't know you're middle name McKinnon, will you do me the honour of being my…."
"Where are you going with this?"
"Friend?" He barely got the word out before Marlene was literally choking with laughter.
Authors note: sorry this took so long and it's not completely wonderful but thank you for the reviews xx
