Author's Rants
Helllllooooo~! I'm back with Chapter 3! Yay! Huh? What? Why am I so late? Er...erm...ahhh...well, let's just say due to this reason and that reason, I couldn't get this up in time. Besides, you guys put a lot of reviews you know? To be honest, I spent more time replying to them then actually writing the story :P Anyways, chapter 3 is up now! Obviously, otherwise how are you reading this eh? On a side note, is anyone...kinda let-down about the DragonBall Super? I mean, it was soooo hyped up as to what the continuation is all about, but they ended up cheating us fans! They are redoing Both the dam movies, one after another before actually entering into the new story-line. Meh...whatever. Its still DragonBall...and I'll watch anything which has Goku and Vegeta in it. But i sincerely pray to God...PLEASE let the English dub come out soon! I absolutely loathe the Japanese voice actors in this anime! They are killing me! T_T Heck, even the BGM sucks! Come on, you know that what I'm saying is true! Nonetheless, Dragonball FTW! Ok maybe I've ranted enough eh? Alright, on to the R2R section!
R2R (Numbering continues from previous reviews)
Review #11
Reviewer: Neo Yami80
Review: Oh boy, now Turles, Nappa, and Raditz are going to escape HFIL. Man, Jiraiya is even more surprised here than the original (and Goku didn't even turn SSJ). WHY ARE THEY SMOKING?! DON'T THEY KNOW IT'S BAD FOR THEM?! Oh wait... lung cancer is no where near enough to kill them. Lol, they were at the same damn cozy room still for hours (and it seemed that you were starting to get frustrated with that). Goku still can't pronounce Hokage, and he's supposed to be a Universal Guardian... Overall, great half chapter, and update soon.
Reply: Haha yup! Turles, Nappa and Raditz are very important to this story, so yup! Also, I felt that with the amount of power Goku has by now, there is no need to show SSJ, and Jiraiya just HAD to be more surprised. And about the smoking part...well let's just say that they wouldn't be getting Lung Cancer at all. They aren't smoking Tobacco...it's something...greener. it's the Herb Effect you see.
Review #12
Reviewer: goku
Review: oh please don't be so rude and formal it's just a story and we all fans want to see goku x tsunade so please don't break our hope please please please please please please buddy.. and don't use goku's ssj form in narutoverse untill broly and now after god power absorbed goku base broly lssj so please remained this ... thank you and one more time it's just a story so please just make little romance between goku and tsunade when she see goku's base form powers and godly body she and other all girls and womens will be nose bleed and in love with our saiyan god... so please just do it...
Reply: I'm very sorry goku-san, if I came across as rude! That was not my intention at all! I understand that fans have wishes, I am a fan first myself! As to the pairing between Goku and Tsunade...again, i am very sorry, but I will not be doing it in this story. Perhaps, when I write my next story, I will do it! ^_^ Also, don't worry about Goku going SSJ for anything serious. To be honest, he's kinda OPed in this story, so I won't have Goku fighting much at all. And you must also understand that Broly, while significantly weaker than Goku right now, is still the LSSJ, and has been around for as long as Goku now, albeit being sealed. Wait and see as to how his character plays out here! :D
Review #13
Reviewer: DragonNOOB
Review: Well if you to calm someone after basically shattering their view of the world some "grass" is a great way to calm the nerves. The fact that Goku and Jiraiya are both "Sages" just makes it even funnier
Reply: I know right! "Grass" does the trick, always ;)
Review #14
Reviewer: GokuDaBest
Review: Please update this was awesome I can't wait for more please don't update in a years time cause I can't wait that long for this AWESOME STROY ;)
Reply: Haha, while It hasn't been a year since I updated, I'm sorry that it has been so long! Please remember one thing though, no matter how long it takes, I am determined to see this story to its end! Won't take YEARS though...so don't worry! :D
Review #15
Reviewer: blackcat505
Review: This is awesome I was hoping someone would take this over and I'm glad you did and I'm also glad you going to have Super Saiyan God in this too and I was wondering If Super Saiyan God Super Saiyan would be in this story too and keep up the good work.
Reply: Thank you very much blackcat! I was also hoping someone would take over this story, alas, no one did. Anyways, I had to do it, if only to see justice done to it! Super Saiyan God is too awesome to not include! Super Saiyan God Super Saiyan is gonna be sooo overkill...that I won't be featuring it for quite sometime. Now, do these forms exist in my story? Yes. Will you be seeing them all? Maybe. Will it be anytime soon? Nope.
Review #16
Reviewer: Guest
Review: It doesnt take a PL of 12 million to destroy Earth. More like 1200.
Reply: I think you might mean something around 12,000 maybe? Anyways, the exact number doesn't matter. I have an explanation for what you said! Please refer to review no. 22 (Reply to Ricardo's review) for the detailed explanation to this!
Review #17
Reviewer: DBZFAN4LIFE0
Review: Great job keep it up.
Reply: Thank you very much DBZFAN4LIFE0! Please continue reading and enjoying!
Review #18
Reviewer: saiyangodryu8
Review: this is grate chapter very intreasting and waiting for next chapter with high expectation. but i got one question how is jiraya stronger than ichibi, i know that ichibi is weakest of tailed beast but if it is weaker than human then how can even we say that he is tailed beast so please change the power levels of tailed beasts.
Reply: Thank you so much ryu8! Actually, it was because of your review that I went back and edited the power levels to make it more fair. It was kinda stupid to have Ichibi's power level so low!
Review #19
Reviewer: Guest
Review: great chapter, update soon
Reply: Thank you very much! While it wasn't 'soon' persay, I have updated!
Review #20
Reviewer: Fan
Review: Really really really liking this man. Nice work. I like the characterisation and interaction, and how Goku is leading by example and not directly intervening. Fits with what he wanted - the earth to defend itself without him. Also at this level, unless the baddies are summoning someone like Demigras, they not got nothing that will threaten Goku...
Reply: Thank you very much! I have to give credit to Dinoman, the author of the original story, for it was his idea to have Goku lead by example! I just took it and worked with it! ^_^
Review #21
Reviewer: Firebird0315
Review: You know, I was expecting Mr. Popo to join them when they were smoking grass. Too bad none of them are there T4S's counterparts as you have Mr. Popo, Napa and Vegeta in this as they're my favorite characters in the abridge series.
And ha, I saw what you did with the biju's power levels'. Personaly I would of added one more zero but this is you're fic so more power to you.
Reply: Haha why didn't I think of that? You're right, Popo should've joined them! Don't worry, we will have plenty more of such scenes to see comedic Popo in action. And man, the abridged series was EPIC indeed! Also, i understand why perhaps you feel that one more zero would've been good for the Bijuu's power levels. However, I feel that that would throw things in this story out of balance. While it may or may not be the true power levels of the Bijuu's, the power levels stated for this story will stay for the sake of balance.
Review #22
Reviewer: Ricardo Rodriguez
Review: Awesome, but there is a slight miss calculation, When vegeta and nappa came off that bug planet, way in the beginning of dbz, vegeta was able to blow up the planet with his two fingers with ease, and vegeta's cannon power level was 18,000, but in a way chakra is far less potent and destructive as ki but it is more flexible, so you should try and make a scale between dbz and naruto in terms of destructive power, like perhaps a dbz power level of 10,000 is a naruto power level of 1,000 (but of course the tailed beasts can be read on the dbz scale, because they have a lot of destructive power as well, but the kyuubi's max power level should be 9,000 because the kyuubi cannot destroy planets but can still level large cities with a powerful blast and wipe continents away, like nappa can, hence his powerful was around 7,000-8,000 and he blew up a city by raising two fingers with a full power Ki release.)
That's all I can say for now, if you don't understand just pm me, and I will explain.
But great job keep up the good work, and tell me what you think.
Reply: Thank you for taking the time to write such a long review Ricardo! I understand what you mean. Lemme tell you a secret...the reason why this chapter is soo delayed...is actually your review. I had to go back, re-watch the entire DBZ series, go through so many theories of power levels and the concept of Ki itself, before I could reply to you. First of all, I would like to state that the power levels will be synonymous with both Naruto and DBZverse. This is because the numbers are representations of what the actual Magnitude of one's power is, regardless of what type of energy or chakra or reiatsu one may use. Imagine Narutoverse chakra being represented in Degree's Celcius and DBZverse Ki represented in Degrees Fahrenheit. The power levels I indicate here, would be them being represented in the SI units for temperature, i.e. degrees Kelvin. Hence, I feel that there will be no need to represent the power levels of chakra and ki differently. It would be too much of a hassle too! :P Also, it is pretty much clear to see that Chakra is DBZ's Ki combined with Bleach's Reiatsu...(Physical+Spiritual=Chakra) Maybe not that way, but that's how I see it! I hope that clarifies the distinction between Naruto Chakra and DBZ's Ki, at least in relation to this story! On to the next point!
Now, I know what you mean that it took only 18,000 power level to destroy a planet. But, You have to understand something here. Just because someone uses, say 20,000 worth of power to destroy Earth, doesn't mean that that's all the power it takes. Let me give you an example. Take a Ferrari F12, which is parked on the roadside. If you wanted to destroy it, without explosives or anything, it would take you a considerable amount of effort. You would have to take a baseball bat, or a club or whatever and start hacking at it and destroy it. Now, Let us say the car is travelling at 150 KM/H or 93 MPH. All you gotta do is throw a brick on the road. With good timing and placement, the car will go over it, flip and destroy itself. I'm sorry for the lame and unclear example, but what I'm trying to say is that one must distinguish between actually Destroying something completely by yourself, versus putting into motion a set of events which leads to the destruction of said something. It takes a power level of 18,000, or anything similar, to de-stablize the Earth's Ki core, in order to allow it to destroy itself. However, it takes a power level of minimum 12,000,000 to put out enough power to destroy the Earth's Ki core itself, thereby having the planet explode on your power, and not its own. This is how I see it. It makes sense to me this way, and I'll be using this logic in my story. I hope I cleared things up a little bit. If you wanted to know where i pulled the number 12,000,000 from, its the power level of Frieza's full power, after Goku turned Super Saiyan. In my defense, in the episode where Goku fights Perfect Cell, he charges a Kamehama up, where Piccolo comments that it has enough power to destroy Earth. Now, please understand that this may not be how DBZ cannon works, but this is how things will work in my story. Besides, DBZ is extremely inconsistent with their showing of power.
Review #23
Reviewer: Born-From-Black-Lightning
Review: Great chapter. the power lvs of the Bijuu seem a little off but I looked at several other reviews and they seem to have covered that so I'm leaving that alone. Well except 4 the 9-tails. Is his written Pwr Lv just 1/2 or is it the whole because he is split in half right now. Or is he even split in this fic to begin with?
P.s.-To your reply I'm not good at grammar but yes that is what I meant
I'll read ya later-BFBL
Reply: Thank you very much! I've corrected the power levels of the Bijuu, and hope it fits in now. Also, to make things simpler, I'm just disregarding the fact that Kyuubi was split up. Even in cannon, the whole issue was solved super anti-climatic. So let's just say he was never split. Oh, and I hope I din come off as pointing out your lack of grammar! Forgive me if that's the case! It was just a small joke ^_^ Once again, thank you very much!
P.S. Your name is uber cool :P
Review #24
Reviewer: Guest
Review: Hmm, love the story.. but how is Vegeta alive? Only Goku is immortal through absorbing the Dragonballs. In the last few eps of DBGT Vegeta is dead..
Reply: Thank you very much! Vegeta is alive in the last few episodes of GT...isn't he? I'm not so sure about that part. However, either way, it doesn't matter. He was granted immortality, and it will be reveleaved very soon as to how! The entire story of what happens after GTand before this story, will be coming as a chapter by itself pretty soon.
Review #25
Reviewer: Solo
Review: U know madara at his best form was equel's napa...dbz is wayyyy op for naruto universe...now u made goku immortal and he is now more than 3,000 year's old...still train's...so i have 2 question hope u will plz answer
powerful goku really is now?
come vegeta still alive?
Reply: Hmmm, madara at his best form, in my opinion, was equal to more like vegeta when he first came to Earth. That's what I feel. Maybe we can have that discussion as to why i feel so over PM, but I basically agree with you that DBZ is super OPed for Narutoverse. As to how powerful Goku really is now, you will see that soon! I'll show the true extent of his power. Also, refer to the reply to the previous review, as to why I have Vegeta still alive.
Review #26
Reviewer: Solo
Review: And if u plz could pair someone with goku...i don't thing it will be noncanon...chichi must have been died over 2900 year's ago...i thing 2900 year's is enough time to find a new love...and i am already fan of ur far good work...plz update soon...(y)
Reply: Haha, when I said DBZ pairing will be Cannon, i meant that they are still paired! While not alive persay, chichi and bulma are very much around. I will be introducing them within next chapter or two. Besides, I don't want to get into a complex explanation of why seeking new love is not always what needs to be done!
Review #27
Reviewer: Talonsen
Review: All I have to say is that this should be in the Dragon Ball GT Naruto section not the Dragon Ball Z Naruto section.
Reply: Awww...you don't have anything more to say? :( Anyways, there are two reasons as to why its in the DBZxNaruto section. First and Main reason is that the original story, which I have adopted from, was in the DBZxNaruto section. Hence, to maintain continuity, I uploaded it here. Secondly, it is more of a selfish reason :P People visit DBZxNaruto more than GTxNaruto..hehe :P Sorry!
Review #28
Reviewer: SonRanma1
Review: Cool need more.
Reply: Haha and more you get!
Review #29
Reviewer: SonRanma1
Review: Please don't tease us. Give us more of this story. It's well written an make more sense than all the others. Keep up the awesome job.
Reply: Thank you very much for your compliment! And I promise, I didn't mean to tease you guys! As promised, the story continues!
Finally! The R2R is over! Man, I did not expect to spend so much time on that! You guys really rock! Got me seriously thinking for some of those reviews! On to the story now!
Chapter 3: Icha Icha Senju...?
Back in Konoha, life had finally returned to normal, or as normal as things could get. Naruto, and the team that was sent to find Saskue, had returned empty–handed, only to have the news broken to them. Jiraiya's funeral had taken place the day after their return. Naruto was clearly devastated by the news. He left right after the funeral ended and no one had seen him since. Days passed since the Toad Sage's funeral, and Naruto was still nowhere in sight.
A worried Tsunade sent Sakura to try and find her teammate, and hopefully help him in any way she could. Tsunade had not taken the news of Jiraiya's death lightly either. After the funeral, she had visited the memorial stone for a while and had gone back to her office, following which she told Shizune not to let anyone in, unless absolutely necessary. Ever since the funeral, Tsunade had been cooped up in her office, and even went as far as to sleep in it.
Today was the 8th day after she had received the news of Jiraiya's death. The Senju Princess was sitting in her office, as usual. However, this time, she had dismissed everyone, but Shizune. All ANBU guarding the Hokage's room were given a "day off". It was, in a very cliché way, raining today. Today, she was feeling beyond miserable. Today, she wanted to be alone. Today was the day, 25 years back, Jiraiya had exclaimed her love for her. Today was the day Tsunade regretted rejecting him. For today was the day, our dear Godaime Hokage realized she had been in love with the Toad Sage all this while.
"Jiraiya…" Tsunade whispered to no one. "Why…why did you leave me? My eyes are open now…and yet…all I see is how stupidly blind I was..."
Tears started to stream down her face. This wasn't the first time she was crying for the loss of Jiraiya. Time passed by slowly, but surely. Seconds turned into minutes, eventually becoming hours. Finally, the tears stopped pouring, if only because she had run out of them. Wiping her face, she reached down to one of her drawers, pulled it out, and picked out one of the strongest Sake she had. Within moments, she had chugged the entire bottle, down the the very last drop.
"Oh Jiraiya…why… (hic) ...Why…WHY?! Why did you die?! How could you?! Why was I SO STUPID as to realize now, after so long…that…I love you." Tsunade harshly shouted to, again, no one.
In a raging fury, she stood up and flung the bottle across the room. At that very moment, something snapped inside her. She started undressing. She took off all of her clothes, till she was standing bare–butt naked.
(Warning. M-rated section begins)
She reached down to her drawer again and took another bottle of Sake, along with a shiny, long, white, thing. It was cylindrical, having a diameter of about an inch, and a length of about 8 inches. Tsunade reached again into her drawer and took out an almost identical looking thing, except it was black in colour this time.
There was a seal at the bottom of both things, which Tsunade brought her fingers up to. Channelling some chakra into the tip of her finger, she touched the seal. Immediately, these things jumped to life, and started vibrating. Tsunade cleared her table, bent over and laid her bare, bouncy chest on it. Shifting her bubble butt to face the door, which was obviously locked, she spread her legs a bit wider. She then proceeded to bring one of the vibrating things in–between her legs, and inserted in deeply inside herself. She then brought the other one and similarly inserted it into her body, difference being it inserted into the other hole.
"Eeep!" Tsunade squealed in a very cute, erotic way. "Oh my god…JIRAIYA! Yes! Punish me! I've been such a stupid, stupid, STUPID girl!" Tsunade said, with a near–insane look on her face, which was a battlefield between tears streaming down, and an erotic smile forming. She had started with those words, but it most certainly did not end there. Tsunade continued with her punishment, in a weird, chaotic mixture of sadness, pleasure and guilt.
"Oh…JIRAIYA!" Tsunade screamed out.
(M-rating ends)
(In the meantime...elsewhere in Konoha)
Sakura was still trying to find Naruto, but with no luck. No one had seen him since the funeral and he was nowhere to be found. She had already checked his apartment, the ramen shop, the Hokage Monument, the academy, and was running out of places to look.
"Man it's really raining today, it's a good thing I decided to bring this hooded cape Tsunade gave me or I would be drenched. Haaa…Where are you Naruto?" she sighed as she continued to walk down one of Konoha's main streets. Indulged in her own thoughts, she was broken out of it only when her legs stopped in front of a familiar flower shop.
"Hmm…I might as well take a break and see what Ino is doing" She thought as she approached her best friend's family store.
"Welcome to our Flower shop!" Ino shouted, with a smile, as the door chimed upon Sakura's entry.
"Nothing today Ino–pig, just trying to get out of the rain" she said, as she removed the wet hood from her head.
"Oh hey Forehead…what are you doing outside on a day like this anyway?"
"Tsunade–sama told me Naruto been missing since the funeral…Both she and I are very worried. I have been out looking for him and I have checked just about everywhere, but no luck. I'm really starting to worry about him now."
"Well, I can't say I've seen him! Maybe you should ask Iruka–sensei. He usually knows what Naruto–kun's doing"
"I already did, he's been busy with the academy students and hasn't seen him since we left for our last mission. He too, in fact, has been looking for Naruto."
"What about Kakashi–sensei? He could probably find him"
"Can't, he's in the hospital again for using his new eye technique too much on that Akatsuki guy we faced the other day, Tsunade–sama says he will be there for a few days more"
"Man, I didn't think Naruto could stay quiet for this long…out of our graduating class he was always the loudest one but since he just lost the guy who trained him for over three years, I guess it's not too surprising." She said as she remembered Jiraiya's funeral.
"For once, I kinda know how he must feel. When Asuma–sensei died, none of us wanted to do anything. It's thanks to Shikamaru–kun we all managed to move on and keep going"
"Yeah I know, after we got back from our mission and were told what had happened to Jiraiya he didn't say a word until the funeral. For the first time, I saw no life in his eyes. The moment the funeral was over, he just up and left. I really don't know what is going through his head. I just hope he doesn't do anything stupid like try to avenge Jiraiya–sama…anyone who could beat the strongest of the Sannin, could definitely tear Naruto apart. I hope I can do something for him when I find him though. To be honest I have never seen him this down before. Disappointed or stressed? Maybe. But never purely just sad."
"Well, I'm sure you'll come up with something." Ino said before a mischievous smile crawled across her face. "You know if you really wanted to make him feel better, you could always go on a date with him! He has been asking you for one for quite some time hasn't he?"
"Somehow I don't think that will help much Ino" Sakura said rolling her eyes.
"Ok if you say so, it's too bad boys get more confusing when they get older, remember the good old days when we had them almost completely figured out?"
"Ino, we never had the boys in this village figured out."
"Well maybe you didn't because of that huge forehead of yours"
"Whatever Ino–pig"
The two stopped for a second and started laughing. Even though they didn't always get along, they were still as best friends as they could be.
"Well I better get going. Knowing Naruto, I'm sure he doesn't have the common sense to get out of the rain."
"Yeah I have to get going soon too! The boys and I are running through some training exercises Shikamaru set up for us. Normally I'd find an excuse not to go, but were going to be practicing at our old training grounds. Haaaaa…it will be so nostalgic. Even though I don't think Shikamaru was expecting it to rain."
Then it hit her, the one place she hadn't looked yet was squad seven's old training grounds! Naruto had to be there!
"Ino, You're a genius! You must be trading love juices with Shikamaru or something! Thanks!" Sakura said as she rushed out the door.
"Wha…? Lo–Lov–Love juices?! N–no way! Sakura! Get your pink ass back here!" Ino shouted, with a furious blush on her face.
Right about then Goku and Jiraiya, who was looking very ill, had just appeared in front of Konoha's large gates.
"..at? UGGGHH" Jiraiya let out a groan as he doubled over and held his stomach. A few minutes passed, as Jiraiya regained his composure and finally noticed where he was.
"What the hell?! One moment we are at the Lookout, and the next, we're in front of Konoha! What is going on Goku?!" Jiraiya all but screamed.
"Ah...haha oops, I might have forgotten to mention it! We just used my favourite Instant Transmission technique to get here! As the name suggests…it's instantaneous! We'll discuss about it in detail later ok? Let's get going for now!" Goku replied with a sheepish grin on his face.
"Alright…" was all Jiraiya could respond to that. 'Man…that was pretty much like teleportation…this guy…he is beyond amazing…' Jiraiya thought to himself. "By the way Goku, I don't mean this in a bad way, but I am NEVER DOING THAT AGAIN!" the Sage shouted.
"Hehe…Sorry again! I forgot to mention that you might get sick from the trip." Goku chuckled rubbing the back of his head "Anyway, we should probably get out of the rain… since you just got better and all!"
"Yeah, just a sec. I gotta inform those two gate keepers that you're with me" Jiraiya said as he walked up to the guard post station.
Izumo and Kotetsu were, as usual, acting as gate keepers, sitting back and relaxing. It was a pretty routine job. It was one that definitely did not involve seeing dead Toad Sages, and most definitely not having him appear out of thin air. It would have been another normal day, had they not witnessed what had just happened. Before they could react, said Toad Sage was walking towards them.
"Hey guys! How've you been? Just to let you two know this guy is with me, ok? Oh, it's raining, so make sure you don't get wet! Catcha later!" Jiraiya announced as he walked past, with Goku on his tail, waving cheerfully at the stunned duo. After a minute, Kotetsu opened his mouth.
"Izumo…do Ghosts exist?"
"…I…don't think so…"
"So…then why did Jiraiya just walk past with someone…and give us advice about the rain…?"
"…I…Don't…Know"
"So…we must have imagined this?"
"Yes Kotetsu. This never happened…agreed?"
"…Agreed."
"Good" The two said in unison as they returned to what they were doing, which was nothing.
"Hey Jiraiya, what's up with those two? They were looking at us funny" Goku asked innocently.
"Uh oh… I forgot everyone thinks I'm dead and walking down the street is going to bring more attention to myself then I want" the now worried sage thought. "Hey Goku would you mind warping us over to the entrance of that big building over there" Jiraiya asked sheepishly as he pointed to the Hokage tower.
"Why? I thought you didn't like me using Instant Transmission?"
"I know I said that, but I want to do it just one more time, ok?"
"Ok then, put your hand on my shoulder and we will go!" Goku said.
When the sage did as he was told the two vanished and were at the Hokage tower in less than a second.
"Here we are!" Goku announced "Hey are you ok?" he asked as he noticed that Jiraiya was now in a bush puking.
"Uggghhhhhhh yeah…I'll be fine now that my stomach is empty. Ok, you ready to go in?"
"Yep, Let's Go!" Goku said in a voice that reminded him of Naruto.
"Now listen Goku, Tsunade can be a little…temperamental sometimes and I think it may be safer for the both of us if I go in alone first, ok" the sage said still thinking of the consequences of what he had just said.
"Ok that's fine! But don't worry, my wife can be temperamental sometimes too, especially when it comes to training. That frying pan…" Goku said with a shiver, remembering how Chi–Chi threatened him with the almighty weapon of wives.
As they walked in they both were surprised at how empty the place was. There wasn't a soul in the entire building. As the two got closer to Tsunade's office they noticed Shizune sitting at her desk outside the Hokage office. She was sitting in her chair doing a crossword puzzle and chewing on the pencils eraser when Goku and Jiraiya walked up.
"Sorry, the Hokage isn't seeing anyone today, you'll have to come back later" Shizune said not looking up from her puzzle.
"Oh I'd think she would want to see me" Shizune's head shot up at the familiar voice to see non other the Jiraiya sanding right in front of her. She blinked a few times in disbelief before saying anything.
"Jiraiya–sama! Is that really you?"
"The one and only"
"But I thought…. You were supposed to be…. Dead?"
"It's kinda a long story but as you can see I'm not and I kinda need to talk with Tsunade, is she in?"
"Long story huh…well, I'm so glad that you are still alive Jiraiya–sama! Tsunadesama is in! Let me go tell her you're here" Shizune stammered as she got up and went to her mistresses' office and knocked softly.
"Ah hold up Shizune–chan…let me do the honours. It will be fun the see the look on her face when I enter unannounced hehe."
"Huh…? Oh…alright Jiraiya–sama! Please be careful though…it is Tsunade, and you know her temper…"
"Thanks Shizune! Don't worry, I'll deal with Hime's temper! Oh and Goku if you see anything being thrown through the door its fine…I hope. Don't enter even if you hear me screaming for my life. Though, seriously speaking, Tsunade obviously will not be killing me."
"Haha, Ok! Just let me know when it's my turn!" Goku said as he smiled.
Jiraiya gave a thumbs up to Goku as he walked up to the door around the corner.
As Jiraiya disappeared from their view, Goku noticed that Shizune was looking at him.
"Hey are you ok? You're turning kinda red"
"Oh sorry! I didn't mean to stare" Shizune said frantically trying to hide the fact that she thought he was somewhat attractive "It's just that I don't think I've seen you around the village before."
"Well that's because I'm not from around here! Actually I'm coming down here after a few hundred years!" Goku explained innocently.
'A few hundred years?' "Haha…you have a good sense of humour…So…how do you know Jiraiya?" She questioned.
"Well it's kinda a long story, but I helped save him! Oh I don't think I have introduced myself yet, my name is Goku" reaching out his hand to shake hers.
"I'm Shizune, Secretary of the Godaime Hokage! It's nice to meet you Goku" She said.
The two continued to make small talk, oblivious to the embarrassing events yet to unfold behind them.
As Jiraiya stood in front of the door and reach out to the handle, he noticed it was locked.
'Hmmm, looks like Hime wants some privacy…hehe too bad Tsunade! I ain't giving you any! Let's see just what exactly it is that you are doing that needs the building to be empty, AND the door to be locked' Jiraiya thought to himself, as he made a single handsign and touched the lock. At that moment, the door made a 'click' noise, signaling that access was granted.
"Oh…Tsunade–hime…guess who's backk~" Jiriaya sung as he opened the door and walked in. There were many situations which had played in his mind as to how the meeting between the two of them would be. What he had not expected, was the scene in front of him.
"Oh…JIRAIYA!" Tsunade was screaming out.
Tsunade, in all of her naked glory, had her oh–so desirable ass, presented to Jiraiya's eyes for a full, clean, uncensored view. Jiraiya just stood there, staring. Who wouldn't?
'Holy…fuck.' Was all Jiraiya could think off, as blood started water-falling out of his nose. Tsunade, however, had not heard or noticed the Toad Sage standing there, allowing Jiraiya to continue ogling at all of her naked beauty.
Jiraiya reach to his pockets and brought out a Handkerchief. He proceeded to tear it into two pieces, as quietly as possible, and stuffed them up his nose to try and control the nosebleed. The only thing this achieved was to allow the blood to soak the kerchief and drip down at a slower rate.
"Oh…oh yes! That's it! Fuck me! Fuck me hard! OHHHH~~" Tsunade moaned out in pleasure.
'Keke…this..is…EPIC!' Jiraiya practically screamed out in his head, with the most perverted grin plastered on his face. At that point in time, a genius idea struck him. He immediately took out a blank scroll and a brush, and started to paint the scene happening in front of him. About 10 minutes later, his painting was complete.
'Oh My GOD…this is gonna be fucking PRICELESS! Fellow perverts of the Elemental Nations, you all will owe me BIG TIME! MUAHAHAHAHA' Jiraiya laughed an evil laugh in his head.
'Now…let's leave before Hime notices…No matter how stealthy I am, it will be hard to stay unnoticed for too long…I managed it till now only because my dear Hime seems busy with….ahem playing with herself keke..' Jiraiya thought, as he slowly started tip–toeing backwards.
Unfortunately for Jiraiya, the blood dripping from his nose had formed a humongous puddle all around him. The first step Jiraiya took backwards, he slipped.
"Oh My God…YES! That's it…Fuck me hard Jira–"
(Screech woosh….THUD)
Jiraiya fell. Hard on his ass. The blood continued to make him slip, as his behind slipped up into the air, with him banging his head on the ground. He finally came to a stop, head on the ground, ass hoisted in the air, in an extremely comical position. From God–knows–where, tweety birds were circling his head.
The instant she heard the fall, Tsunade whipped her head around so hard that it made a cracking noise.
Her eyes locked gaze with Jiraiya's. For a whole minute there was silence, save for the (BZZZZ) noise of the vibrating things. Then, all hell broke loose.
"Coffee with mayonnaise is THE BEST! You CANNOT argue against that! The bitter, yet thin coffee combined with the thick rich flavor of Mayo…ooooh it's orgasmic!" Shizune passionately told Goku.
"What?! Ewww! Uggh I'm feeling sick just imagining it! Disgusting! No! The best drink is Green Tea with a topping of Ketchup! Now THAT is awes–" Goku argued back, before he was interrupted.
Both Shizune and Goku felt a HUMOUNGOUS killing intent being released, with thirst for blood SO intense, that it would've made Frieza look like a wailing brat. A huge blast of chakra was release right after that.
(BOOOOM) The entire building shook HARD, as Goku and Shizune lost their footing.
"What the…what was that?!" Goku shouted amongst the rumbling sound.
"Oh…oh no…that is Tsunade–sama's chakra being released…what did Jiraiya do that made her so angry?! Goku-san, please wait here." Shizune screamed back. Quickly getting back on her feet, she ran towards the Hokage's room.
"Tsunade–sa.." was all she could say as she entered the room. Her voice got caught in her throat at the sight in front of her. Tsunade's clothes were flung aside on the floor, while Tsunade herself was standing there naked, fists clenched, vein throbbing in her head and with the most raged crazy look on her face. However, the most obvious thing was the HUGE hole on the floor, right in front of her. Shizune walked up to the hole and peeked down into it. It went all the way down, till the ground floor. At the very bottom, she could see a figure lying still. She didn't know if she was imagining it, but there seemed to be a smile of pure bliss across his face. He seemed to be mouthing something along the lines of 'No Regrets'.
"Tsunade–sama…is that….Jiraiya–sama…? And…why are you naked…?" Shizune asked, as she inched away from the Godaime Hokage, for fear of her life.
Tsunade turned her head and looked at Shizune. Taking a few deep breaths, she calmed herself down.
"Shizune, there seems to be some kind of undead insect which entered my room. It's alright, there is no need to worry. I have swatted it away. Would you mind handing me my clothes, and clean up that insect's remains?" Tsunade asked in a sweet voice, with a creepy smile on her face.
"Wha…erm…ok..Tsunade–Sama…" was all Shizune managed, before she proceeded to help her Hokage.
(Half an Hour Later)
Tsunade, now fully dressed, was sitting on her chair, a scowl plastered on her face. She was accompanied by Shizune, who was standing at her side. Jiraiya, whose nose was bandaged up since it was still dripping blood, was sitting in opposite her with a distant look in his eyes, and a perverted smile on his face, along with the occasional giggle. Goku was sitting beside him, completely unaware and confused as to what was happening.
No one spoke for a few minutes. It was Shizune who decided the silence was unbearable.
"Ahem…erm…does anyone want some Coffee or Tea?" Shizune asked with a nervous smile.
Goku, being the Goku we all know, immediately raised his hand and shouted "ME! I would like some Green Tea with Ketchup please!"
This peculiar request caught the attention of Tsunade and Jiraiya, as they turned they heads and gave Goku a look as though he had just spoken an alien language.
Shaking her head "I'll have some Coffee, no sugar Shizune. Get our guest what he wants…and that should be enough. I don't think insects drink coffee or tea." Tsunade said, while glaring at Jiraiya. Shizune nodded, and walked off, relieved to finally leave the unbearable atmosphere.
"What?! What can I do?! How am I supposed to know that you were doing…that! Can you blame me for looking? Hell, can you blame any straight guy for not looking?" Jiraiya argued, trying to justify himself.
"Huh? What happened Jiraiya?" asked Goku innocently.
"Hehe…well you see Goku…when I came in, Tsunade was–" Jiraiya started to answer him.
"SHUT UP YOU INSECT! Don't you DARE tell ANYONE about this!" Tsunade literally screamed at Jiraiya. After a few minutes of glaring daggers at him, she let out a deep sigh.
"Haaa…you know what? Let's just move on…for now. First things first. What in the name of Rikudo Sennin are you doing here…ALIVE?!" Tsunade asked Jiraiya.
"Awww…come on! You almost make it sound disappointed at that! Though I cannot deny that I got the best Welcoming Scene Ever! Hehe.." Jiraiya replied giggling.
Tsunade proceeded to reach across the table and grabbed the Sage by his neck and started shaking him like a rag doll. "You IDIOT! Do. You. Even. Know. How. Much. I. Went. Through?! Screw you! Oh my god, the paperwork involved now that you're back! The amount of money we spent for the funeral! You. Retarded. Idiot! This is the WORST stunt you EVER pulled, and it's NOT FUNNY!" Tsunade yelled.
"Ahhhhhh itsssss hisssss faaaaaault!" Jiraiya squeaked, desperately pointing at Goku.
"Don't blame your faults on others you IDIOT!" Tsunade yelled.
"Nooooooo, I mmean heees the one wwho saaaved me wwwhen I looost conciousnesss" Jiraiya managed to say.
"What did you say?" Tsunade asked as she stopped shaking the sage.
"I was going to die, until he pulled me out of the lake right after I passed out. By that time, I had already sent that message to you" Jiraiya said, while rubbing his sore neck.
By this point all eyes were on the confused Saiyan.
"So…you saved him?" the confused Hokage asked.
"Yeah…I did… Hehehe" Goku answered rubbing the back of his head again.
"Oh…well then I guess the village owes you a great thanks for saving one of our most valuable…insects" she said looking at Jiraiya who was at this point trying to regain his composure. "So…who exactly are you? How did you save him? Please let me know of all the details. It is not every day that someone of the Sannin is defeated by someone, let alone get saved by someone else.
At this point, Shizune walked back into the room with a tray in her hand. Setting the drinks down for everyone, she re-joined Tsunade's side.
"Ah, thank you Shizune-san! So…where were we? Ah yes, my name is Goku. I think you better get comfortable, cause this is going to be one looooong story." Goku said.
"Once upon a time…" Goku started, as he cocked his head and looked upwards, seemingly at nothing.
"And that's how I became immortal" Goku ended.
"WHAT?! What the hell?! You didn't say anything! You just said once upon a time, stared at nothing for a few minutes, and looked back and said 'that's how I became immortal'…like we're supposed to know wtf is going on!" Tsunade shouted.
"Huh? Oh crap, hehe sorry! There was supposed to be a flashback scene which will directly play in your heads right now. It's one of those convenient fanfiction things, where the authors don't have to explain stuff." Goku replied sheepishly.
"You just admitted that we are part of a story didn't you? Goku, you're not supposed to do that! The readers aren't supposed to know that we know we're in a story! For Heaven's sake Goku, don't jeopardize our existence! This story hasn't even become decently popular yet!" Jiraiya cried out.
"Sigh…whatever, just…do it right this time." Tsunade said.
"Haha…yea, oops! Alright so let's do it right. So…Once upon a time…" Goku started, again, as all three of them turned their heads to look at nothing.
"And that's how I became immortal.
By the time he was finished both Tsunade and Shizune were flabbergasted to say the least. Goku had told them all that he had told Jiraiya about.
"Well…that is an interesting story, Goku-san." Tsunade said. "However, the entire thing seems to be just that, a story. To be honest, I'm not sure I believe the entirety of it. You claim to have reached the level of being able to destroy entire planetary systems…I'm sorry, but I'm extremely sceptical about that."
After pondering a bit, Tsunade continued "Maybe, if you can show me some proof of your power, I'll be able to believe you and your story. Seeing as you managed to save Jiraiya without catching the attention of Pein, I'll agree that you are definitely skilled. However, I am extremely disbelieving of your claim to destroy planets."
"Huh…well, what kind of proof?" Goku asked intently.
"Hmm…how about this, you said you are an immortal galactic guardian, and that you are far stronger than any of us. So how about you prove it? We'll go up to the roof and you can show us how strong you are. Maybe a spar with me will clear up your delusions" Tsunade smirked with overconfidence.
"Ah! A spar? Haha…alright! I have my limiter on anyways, so it shouldn't be dangerous!" Goku said smiling again.
'Oh boy Tsunade doesn't know what she's getting in to. She doesn't realize the sheer amount of chakra he really has. I guess I could tell her…but given that treatment I got, I think I will let her figure this out on her own. Hehe.' Jiraiya thought to himself.
"Hold on, before we go, Jiraiya you need to go find Naruto. He took the news of you supposedly being dead quite hard. He's even managed to avoid contact with anyone for the past two days. I've already sent Sakura out to try to find him. However, I feel it will better if you go in person.
"Ho…Naruto eh? Alright I'll find the knuckle head, I'm sure he's around here somewhere" the Sage said.
"Hey, I could help you find him the same way I found you." Goku chimed in.
"What are you talking about? You told me that you needed Dende's help to track me down and if you couldn't find me on your own, how do you expect to find Naruto?"
"You'd be surprised; did you think I was just goofing around when you were unconscious? All it took was for me to re familiarize myself with power signatures from earth. Besides, Dende showed me all the strong power levels, including Naruto's while you were asleep. All I have to do is remember what his power felt like…. And ….There got it. Is it ok with you if I go really quick Miss. Hokegi?" Goku asked.
"Yes that's fine, but Goku, my title is Hokage not Hokegi." Tsunade said a little confused at the wrong pronunciation.
"Great, then Jiraiya put your hand on my shoulder and we can go"
Hearing this Jiraiya knew exactly what was coming and he immediately jumped back and retaliated.
"Oh no you're not getting me to go on another one of those 'put-two-fingers-on-my-head-teleport-magically-and-fuck-up-your-insides' trip with you! I've already taken one trip too many and I'm not doing it again!"
"Haha, ok then! We can fly I guess" Goku suggested. By this point Jiraiya had forgotten allabout seeing Goku flying at the lookout and to him it sounded at least a little better then throwing up so he agreed.
"Alright the climb on my back and hold on tight"
"Ok so maybe this isn't much better, it's almost as creepy as Guy and Kakashi giving piggy back rides why they returned from Suna." The Sage thought.
Just then, a thought occurred to the Sage. Before they left, Jiraiya turned to look at Tsunade and asked "Hey, Hime. Just a question…can I use…that scene as an inspiration for my next book? Maybe i'll call it...Icha Icha Senju...?"
Right about then, a massive wave of killer-intent flooded the room, as Tsunade began charging up chakra on her fist.
"Eeeeep! Goku, go. NOW!" Jiraiya screamed, as if he had seen a ghost.
"Haha, Here we go!" Goku said as he opened the window and his white aura burst forth. Not more the two seconds later they were launched into the air at break neck speed.
"The sight of two grown men, one piggy back riding on the other, flying away from her room brought Tsunade out of her rage. Now, she was just plain confused.
"Tsunade-sama…how did he do that?" Shizune asked.
"I…have no clue." The Slug Princess shrugged.
So, with that, we conclude this chapter! As you can see, the story content isn't as long as everyone else or I would've liked. However, to be realistic, I had no choice but to keep it as such. I hope you guys bear with me, for all chapters will be of similar length (about 4-5k words excluding the other sections). Alright then, onto the StarNotes!
StarNote*:
*Erm, since I'm feeling a bit lazy...please read the R2R section this time around...there's a bit too much to explain zzzz
*Sorry for the random M-rated section in between! I just had to get it out of my head! Try imagining such a scene ;) Also, it should be obvious that TsunadexJiraiya is imminent.
PowerLevels:
There wasn't much action in this Chapter, hence not many new power levels introduced.
Tsunade (enraged with Jiraiya): 5,000
Tsunade full power: 10,000
That's all for today folks! Until next time, may Life treat you well!
