A/N: I've reworded Chapter One to include an imagine spot of a duel between Genghis Khan and Alexander. Go back to read that if you missed it.
Chapter Two: When In Rome…
Five years later, the streets of Rome were filled like never before to hear the announcement of Prince Augustus Caesar's bride-to-be.
A burst of fanfare caught the crowd's attention as the royal family and their guards took to their balcony. King Enrico Dandolo waved absentmindedly to the crowd as his wife, Queen Maria Theresa, smiled proudly. Standing to the right of the prince was his closest advisor and friend, Count Attila. Stepping forward, Augustus Caesar addressed the crowd.
"My people! A month from now, Rome will celebrate its 500th anniversary. On that glorious day, I shall wed a woman who was at one point a lowly commoner as you are. Perhaps you may not find her to be common now."
Augustus looked over the vast crowd with a grin.
"Would you like to meet her?"
The crowd responded with a rousing cheer.
"My people, living among you all this time, the princess of Tyre… Princess Dido!" Augustus announced. The crowd turned as more fanfare announced the coming of the princess. Dressed in a regal robe, Dido emerged from behind the doorway. The crowd bowed to their princess and future queen, either out of respect or fear of reprisal from Augustus Caesar's guards.
Of course, Dido was less than enthusiastic about marrying Caesar. The law of the land gave him the right to marry whomever he wanted, but she did not love him. To say she even liked him would be a stretch. Despite Caesar's assurances that she would grow to love him, or at the very least appreciate him, Dido found the only thing that gave her anything resembling joy was her daily horse rides.
Dido rode through a vast forest, contemplating leaving Rome, escaping to somewhere else… anywhere else; somewhere that disgusting Augustus Caesar would not be able to find her. Caesar's attitudes had left Rome with many enemies, and King Dandolo's ailing health would not allow him to repair those bonds. As she rode, Dido encountered three men arguing over a map. One man was quite thin, with round glasses and a kindly look on his face. Another wore a number of swords, and light samurai armor. The last was enormous, incredibly muscular with a lengthy beard. The old, thin man hailed her as she passed.
"Excuse me, milady, my protectors and I have become very lost. Would there happen to be a village or city nearby?" He asked with a soft voice.
Dido looked around briefly before answering, "I'm sorry, there isn't a settlement around for miles."
The largest man began to walk towards Dido as the old man spoke again.
"Then no one will be near enough to hear you scream." He said, his soft voice turning sinister.
Before Dido could crack the reigns of her horse, the bearded man already had her.
"Excuse me?" Boudicca interrupted, "It's that easy? Just because Dido is a princess, doesn't mean she is defenseless!"
"I'm just reading what is written…" Washington defended himself.
"I mean, sure Dido doesn't quite look like she could lead an army, no offence, doesn't mean she isn't able to outsmart these bandits!"
"Excuse me?" Gandhi asked, "Are you inferring that I am a barbarian?"
"Gentlemen, ladies…" Washington attempted to interject.
"Hey, you're the one abducting a princess in the middle of a forest!" Boudicca shouted.
"And you are taking the content of this story too seriously!" Gandhi shouted back.
"IT'S LEIF ERIKSON DAY!" Montezuma interrupted with his ramblings, "HINGA DINGA DURGEN!"
"Alright, that's offensive!" Harald shouted, standing up.
"Can I get some decorum in here please?" Washington pleaded.
"ENOUGH!"
The shout was loud enough to diffuse the situation, as everyone turned to stare at a fuming Maria Theresa.
"Everyone sit down and be silent! I want to hear the story, not discuss the depiction of women in the media or the representation of Danish culture by insane Aztecs!"
After a full minute of silence, Washington continued.
"What's that you're ripping?" The man with swords asked his elderly boss, who was attaching ripped cloth to the horse Dido had been riding.
"Fabric from the uniforms of the footmen of the American army." The old man answered, as he tended to his work.
"Where's America?" The large man asked as he carried Dido onto their boat.
"They're across the sea. Rome has many enemies, but America is their most hated one," The old man answered back, sending the horse back toward Rome, "When Caesar discovers his betrothed's corpse on American soil, his suspicions will be confirmed, and there will be war." He continued, boarding the boat.
"Whoa, whoa, hey!" The large man spoke, turning to his boss, "You said nothing of murdering innocent women when you hired us for the job."
"I hired you to help me start a war. It's a highly prestigious line of work; countries have been doing it like this for years! One leader goes to another, an arrangement is set, a representative is sent, something like this happens, then war!" The old man said with a clap of his hands.
"I still don't think it's right." The large man said again.
"I may be growing old, but did I hear you say that you think?" The old man seemed ready to explode, "I hired you for your muscle, not your brain, you berry-addicted vegetable!"
"I agree with Harald," the swordsman said, jumping aboard, "there is no honor in killing that girl."
"What happens to her is not of your concern! I will kill her if you lack the stomach for it!" The old man had officially flipped his lid as he stormed to the swordsman, "But never forget this, Oda: I found you on the roadside blubbering about your 'honor', so drunk you couldn't handle your sword for seppuku!"
"And you," he said turning to the larger man again, "Do you want me to send you back to where you came from? Pushing rocks in exchange for blueberries in Mongolia?"
With this rant ended, the old man finally stormed toward the front of the ship, leaving the swordsman and the giant relatively alone.
"Gandhi… he can really fuss." The swordsman said, earning a small laugh from Harald.
"Fuss, fuss… I think he just likes to scream at us!" He replied, grinning a little.
"I don't think he means any harm."
"He appears to be a little short on charm!" The Viking continued the chain as the ship pulled away from shore.
"Harald, you've got a gift for rhyme."
"I do, Oda… some of the time."
"Enough of that!" Gandhi attempted to interject.
"Harald, are there rocks ahead?"
"If there are, we'll soon be dead!"
"No more rhyming! I mean it!" Gandhi again interrupted, stomping his foot on the deck.
"Anybody want a peanut?" Harald asked, raising a bag of nuts with a wild grin on his face.
"ARRRRRRGH!" Gandhi shouted in frustration and annoyance.
It was nighttime as the group continued to sail across the calm waters.
"We should reach the Rock of Gibraltar by dawn if… why do you keep doing that?" Gandhi asked as Oda continued to scan the horizons.
"Are you certain that we aren't being followed?" The Japanese swordsman asked, as he continued to search the surroundings.
"That would be inconceivable." Gandhi responded smugly.
"Despite what you think, you will be caught," Dido spoke up, catching their attentions, "and when Caesar gets ahold of you, you will all be hanged."
"Of all the necks on this boat, you should be a little more concerned about your own." Gandhi said in his sinister voice.
Oda Nobunaga continued to look around, not convinced the danger had passed.
"Could you stop doing that?" Gandhi asked, exasperated, "We can relax, the job's almost over!"
"You're sure that no one is following us?"
"As I said, it would be absolutely, positively, inconceivable! No one in America knows about this plot, and no one from Rome could have reached us this quickly!" Gandhi said, settling his head against the boat and closing his eyes.
"Just out of curiosity, why do you ask?" Gandhi asked, reopening his eyes.
"Well, I looked behind us, and I'm pretty sure something is there."
"WHAT?" Gandhi nearly shouted as he launched himself from his seat and to the back of the boat. Sure enough there was a ship of some kind.
"Well I suppose it's just some… fishermen out for a pleasure cruise… in monster-infested waters."
As the three kidnappers stared at the ship behind them, a splash was heard. They simultaneously turned to see Dido attempting to swim away, maybe to the other ship.
"What are you waiting for, swim after her!" Gandhi shouted to his men.
"I can't swim very well." Oda shrugged.
"Do you think I can swim in this?" Harald deadpanned, gesturing to his heavy Viking armor.
"GAH!" Gandhi would have torn out his hair if he had any, "Bring the ship around!"
As Gandhi and his men struggled to bring the ship around, Dido continued to swim until a strange wailing noise was heard from under the water.
"Do you know what that sound is?" Gandhi taunted, "Although it may sound like the call of the damned, it may be close enough. That's the cry of the shrieking eel, and it only gets louder as it approaches its prey!"
Dido looked around, hoping to find some other explanation, but the elderly Indian's words were confirmed when a large black snake-like creature passed by, brushing her leg as it did, causing her to scream.
"If you swim back to the ship now, I promise no further harm will come to you. I doubt you'll get such an offer from the eels."
Dido was frozen with fear as three of these eels began to glide in circles around her. One of them broke from the circle, mouth open, ready for a bite of human flesh. Dido's eyes were wide with terror as the-
"You know, she doesn't get eaten by the eels at this time." Washington interrupted his reading, looking around the room at the expressions of his audience.
"At this time?" Dido repeated back with a look of horror on her face as she held Alexander in a death grip.
"Calm down, Dido," Boudicca said, walking over to put a reassuring hand on Dido's shoulder, "You're the heroine of the story. If you die, it'll be closer to the end of the book."
"Boudicca does hold a valid point," Caesar said as he leaned back in his chair, "You can relax now, preferably before you suffocate Alexander."
Dido released Alexander from her grip, causing him to fall forward onto the table gasping at the sudden burst of oxygen.
"If I didn't know better, I'd say you're getting interested in the story." Harald mocked the Roman emperor as he put his feet on the table.
"No, I was more concerned about the health and safety of-"
"Oh come on, you've never really liked Alexander." Genghis Khan cut Caesar off before he could attempt to recover his position.
"Can we get back to the story please?" Dido excitedly asked, turning to Washington.
Dido's eyes were wide with terror as the eel charged towards her, but it was struck in the head by Harald, who then leaned over the side of the boat and pulled Dido back in.
"That ship is getting closer." Oda observed as Gandhi bound Dido's hands.
"That is of no concern to us!" Gandhi snapped back, before turning his attention back to Dido, "I suppose you think you're brave."
"Only compared to certain individuals." Dido answered back sharply.
"See? That's what I'm talking about!" Boudicca said, "Dido may not be able to hold a sword, but she was smart enough to try to escape!"
"Thanks… I think." Dido responded.
"I believe we should resume the story, lest we risk the wrath of 'Mother Maria'." Oda commented as Washington turned to the next page.
A/N: Another chapter so soon? Excuse me for being impatient. It'll help tie you over while I continue to write the story and rework sections of the chapters I've already written.
