I am very bored. And boredom let my imagination go wild. That's all my reason of writing.
WARNING: DON'T TAKE FRANCE'S WORDS SERIOUSLY! IT IS HIGHLY DANGEROUS AND FICTIONAL! And used of Google Translate. Oh and swearing.
Thanks for those who reviews this! I was like and then I was like XD.
Oh and Guest: Thanks for the compliment and insult. Sorry if my views of the Hetalian Characters are vague and inaccurate but in this fic I totally made them like that plus I really think France is a pervert but has a deeper side to it. You'll see later.
Title: It's France's Fault
Chapter 3: The Date
~Mon Ami~
When England expects something great, it should be great and he should be leaping in joy and satisfaction and he should be squealing like a girl who had just been proposed to but, even as other nations follow them in their date in a spy way which they were very good at because he can see them in an obvious location, today he was very disappointed and dare he say it, bored. It was typical and loud and not so much like how he imagined. He thought it would be like walking on the beach while the sun sets or candle-lit dinner or stargazing in a hilltop while whispering sweet nothings to each other or even a peaceful picnic in a serene rose garden just the two of them and not like this, never like this. So loud and crowded, sure couples came here, and yes they are an official couple now because he says so, but that's not the point. He wants it classy and romantic and cheesy events out of fluffy romance novels but not like this. Sure, he can suggest going to the Ferris Wheel but really he's sick of that game. He remembers asking America of riding it but he freaks out and said instead to ride that bloody roller coaster.
England glares and frowns at everything America suggested because he doesn't liked any of them. Sure, he's in love with the bloody American but surely he still can insult the bloody American for his bloody crappy choice of location for a date because bloody hell, he's picky and he doesn't bloody like the date already. Bloody America.
"Hey, England, look at how many prizes I've already won." America said in his obnoxious voice and England's glares deepen and stupid may be America he still can see that England is obviously not enjoying the date. I mean, England just ripped in pieces the big fluffy bear in just seconds and let's not forget the way he shoves the ice cream in his heroic face and huffed like a fucking diva queen.
"Englaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnddd dd!" America whined and England frowned. France decided that the potion is wearing off but how could that be when Cupid said that the potion would not wear off until America admitted that he loves England like crazy and if England finally admitted in his slumber state within his mind he also love the American. France doesn't like it when the Cupid lied because he's frickin' Cupid that should help spread love. France should investigate it further more and by investigate, torture the Cupid more with feather dust, apparently, Cupid is ticklish but that's a secret you'll never know. And so, he strutted out off the scene like a fashion queen that he thinks he really is.
"You're not winning me like this, you bloody dolt. You pale in comparison with my past lovers, really America, you're not even worth comparing to them." England yawned in boredom as he glanced at the American with little to none interest. America twitched, for a supposed to be love struck England he sure is difficult and picky like that clingy England from hours ago just suddenly disappeared and he had gone back to normal but because England is still here in this date which he would never go if he's in his normal state, America is sure England is still in his unknown state. England smirked at America's reaction, for someone proving his worth he sure do not know how to convince him and if he's like that then let him be difficult all he bloody wants.
"You know how you can prove your worth, love?" England strides gracefully towards America and leans up to whisper to the boy's reddening ears quietly an advice meant for his amusement.
"You can prove your worth if you take me home instead to do what I do best in a room where there are only two people… If you know what I mean, darling." America nearly fainted but fought against it because his manlier that way and pointedly ignore how he shrieks like a little girl. Not that he shrieks like one.
"Or maybe, we can share a cotton candy together!" America hopes desperately to God that England would agree, he even swore that he would not eat burgers for half a day for England to just fucking agree. England, in his very strange behavior, giggles and blushes like a high school girl at the thought of sharing a food with her crush. Silly England and his mood swing and changing attitude caused by the potion. Silly. Silly. Silly.
America almost weep in joy and at the same time jump in fright at the way England, from a diva queen to a shy love struck high school girl, reacted. Unfortunately, shy England is afraid of being lost in the crowd of people and is also afraid of being parted from him which ended in holding hands.
"Th-thank you very much America. I really appreciate it a lot." England blushes and shyly looked at their linked hands, stuttering and being the cutest man he really is. America smiles, he really liked it when England turns like this, he remembers the good ol' days when England is the gentlest person towards him while scaring the hell out of people when he wanted to make sure that they still recalls who he is, The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Much he enjoys England's new way of expressing how deeply in love he is, he still is afraid of England. It's always the cute and shy ones with a hidden plan he had seen it already in Japan's mangas and animes. Those freaking cute ones are always the culprit in a crime. He shivers and wonders what would England do when they're in close room. He pales at the idea of even sharing a room alone.
"Hey! America, are you still listening?" America looks up and saw the green eyes of England glistening in tears and his lips trembling and pouting as he thought that America's attention was elsewhere and therefore he was boring. America felt himself turn to goo at the cutest state of England right now and he might as well punch himself to a bloody oblivion for making England sad. Sad but cute, he almost squeals in the awesomeness of England's cute face.
"Kyaaaaaaaa! Oh, England!" America, in his manly glory, squeals and glomps the Brit who blushes the redder than red blush. England clutches shyly on America's jacket, confused as to how he made him hug him but he's not complaining. "You're so cute~~~"
England smiles cutely up at America and tilted his head in a way that made even the coldest of heart melt at the sight. What a grand plan he had made, who knew that acting like a cute person can make this tough man turn to gooey pile. America smiles brightly back at England forgetting how he thought cute people were always the manipulative kind.
"T-thank you, America, I think…" England whispers shyly at America and America is almost afraid he'll break the dainty man besides him- he was also hesitant of letting him go. When America turns his head away from him to look for any nice booth or ride or show for England, the Brit almost snickers in delight at how easy he can manipulate the stupid American. Really, he loves America but the git is too stupid and he does not like it when the American pushes him away.
In a daze of the past, England, melancholy lonely England, looks almost normal when he smiles sadly at the memory when America turns his back away from him and walks away to be someone he had always wanted to be. England looks at America's back and for a moment he thought he was back on that rainy day of July when his little angle declares his independence from him, he smiles brokenly and his emerald eyes dulled a bit in loneliness because in the end America still chooses to break away from him, still chooses independence instead of him. Maybe, that's why he still clings on and chases him around whether from the potion or from the longing he had hidden deep within his caged heart. Maybe, that's why - he squeezes America's hands gently- he doesn't like it when America pushes him away.
"Hey, America, let's eat that cotton candy you said you would share with me." England suggested and America brightens like the sun that lightens the world, England smiled gently. Today, he would make it easy for America but once he made a wrong move he would bloody commit a bloody murder. Stupid America.
"Sure, Iggy, let's!" America laughed and pushes through the crowd to a booth where a man sells the sweetest cotton candy in the block. England slightly tumbles but easily follows the eager American, hands still linked firmly together. Yes, the American is really stupid.
~Mon Ami~
England twitched in annoyance as America continues to scream his head off in the Haunted House they are in. When he said scary things can make two people closer he hadn't meant America almost ripping his hand off at the strong grip he was holding him. He meant he was going to pretend to be scared so that he has an excuse to cling to America but how can he forget the boy's phobia of ghosts and scary things really. It was glaringly obvious when America went rigid at the mention of the bloody house! Bloody hell!
England wanted to shoot himself at his mistake but he didn't and instead he pretended he's scared too. Really, he tried.
"I'm scared, America. Protect me." England said with emotion colder than ice, feelings harder than stone. His emerald eyes seem to grow cold and harsh as if they're not those lovely pair of joyful eyes America is accustomed it made America wants to run for the hills. England is so different from that sweet man he was just a few minutes ago.
"E-England… Stop that! You're scaring me!" America whimpered and England raises his eyebrow in a manner so cold America thought he was freezing. Inside, where America can't see the inner chibi England, he giggled at the silliness of America and he twirls around with the others who expressed different emotion. Angry England curses America's obliviousness, Shy England decided that it's cute, Happy England laughed, Sad England said that he was sad because America is stupid, and so on and so forth. So many emotions swirling and bursting inside that cold façade of England but the poker face stayed intact. England huffed at America and tried to walk away but as the American clings on to him he couldn't even have more than a step.
"Don't leave me here, England! … Please… don't. I ne-need you.." America's sad little voice seem to make the Brit stop as slowly he looked at the scared American on his leg. England went rigid as slowly a voice seem to speak in his mind, shy and distant and hurt, it whisper, 'How many years did you waited for him to admit that he needed you again? That only did he wanted help?... That he needed you to stay…? When did he last told you that he needs you?'
"Get up! America, no former colony of mine can be a coward and get away with it. I didn't colonize them because they're weak, I colonize them because they have potential to be strong." England said coldly and harshly, a leader to his subject as he glares at America but inside him he was happy and sad and giddy and hurt. He didn't know why though.
"Yes, sir!" America stood up and hurriedly composed himself and tried not to whimper. England looked at him as if not satisfied and he made America drop to give him fifty pushups. After those pushups, he ordered the American to walk through the Haunted House without screaming, America almost cried when England said he was going to be two meters away from him.
Think of good thoughts, America, good thoughts. America reminded himself and almost cries out loud when he thought of The Bad Touch Trio in a spandex. You know, may America and Canada be different but they can still think alike on how they can distract their selves.
Step. Step. Step. America's steps echoed in the creepy hallway of the house, the wood would creak and the doors would suddenly shut close and along the soft whispers of the nonexistent voices of the roaming afterlife people is America's shout for help as he fell down towards the bottom of the hole as the woods give way and he fell, England worriedly run towards the source of the shout and fusses over the fallen American. England's attitude is different again, it was more like of a lover who always worry about his stupid partner.
"Are you alright, America?" America glared towards England as if the Brit is stupid. His body hurts and his head feels like splitting so no, he was not okay. England apologizes to America as he jumped down the hole to help America, the problem is he didn't bring anything to climb back up.
"…"
"…"
"…"
"…"
England smiled lightly and America almost wept in agony. America's stupidity must be rubbing off on England, that, or love made people stupid.
"Ooops…?" England said finally and America did wept. Oh the wonder of love, really.
And now they wait for rescuers who are not aware that they are there because they got sidetracked as well in their adventure in the hunted house.
"Ve~~, Germany! I'm really scared! Ve~~!" Italy clang to Germany who sighed while he watched the coward Italian wave his white flag towards the ghosts who weren't really ghosts but nevertheless scared the shit out of Italy.
"This is very well prepared. Do you think so too, Greece-san?" Greece snored away as Japan dragged him in every room of the house. Prussia pretended to be ghost and scared Spain which in turn made Romano cussed that made the mother of the children there gasped in dismay which made Hungary very angry at Prussia for no reason whatsoever which made Austria wished he was home playing piano which made Australia and New Zealand wonders why they are there but remembers that they were there because they misses England who, by the way, is happily being cuddly with America because the American is scared of the dark.
"England! I'm scared…" America clang to England for dear life while England happily scared the American more for some cozy time.
"You know, I heard that there are supposed to be real ghosts around here somewhere. I wonder where they are…" America almost hugged England the life out of him as he shrieked in a very manly way - because heroes don't scream like a little girl.
"Oh, there they are!" America screamed like a little girl while England smiles sweetly at nothing at all, really, he was just saying hi to the dead, is that really wrong? Oh, the wonders of the potions really.
America then and there fainted when England conversed with the ghosts that are lingering in the hole. Lovely.
~Mon Ami~
A pained laughter echoed throughout the vicinity of a certain Frenchman as another evil one followed it. You know how people tortured each other with so many torture weapons? Like whipping them or something? Yeah? Good. Because France is too manly for that -and beautiful (No one believes him though, they say he was and still is a pervert from sole to crown- a beautiful pervert he would counter).
As I was saying, yes, I'm still speaking, France is too beautiful for that thing and so he went for the manliest weapon on Earth:
Drum rolls please!
BANG!
BOOM!
CLANK!
WOOSH!
I said drum rolls but what the heck!
It's the Feather Dust! DUN! DUN! DUN!
In his defense, France says it's harmless and can't make people bleed and so it's the manliest thing on Earth because he brought it from his own country. Oh, and he says Tickling is the best way to make a person surrender -he can't believe they didn't try this on Germany when they're at World War I and II.
"HAHAHHAHAHA! Oh, please! Stop!" He begged and he pleaded but poor little Cupid, France is making sure if he dies, laughter is his death. He wonders if this is karma from having prank Zeus so long ago when he's still so innocent and childish and he also wonders if France had gone mad.
"Oh, mon petit! You lied to me! Angleterre is not head over heels about Amerique! He keeps on having this weird mood swing!" France sobbed as he mercilessly tickled the panting Cupid. He wanted to make sure his dear Anglais finally have someone who can love him so much that it would make everyone jealous, is that too much to ask? Angleterre had been alone since he was young, he was him grow up alone, living for himself, striving for himself, growing up for himself, and loving for himself. He saw his cute little Angleterre crying for himself and healing for himself and even being so selfish that in every fight he fight for himself because he didn't know how a person should be loved and how a person feel when loved. France wanted Angleterre to find a happiness he was sure would be forever, isn't that how big brothers supposed to do when his little brother never experience happiness? But Angleterre's brothers weren't always there for him, they left them alone to fend for his self and grow up independent, not needing anyone of them.
"S-st-top! I'll e-e-exp-lain!" Cupid rolled away from France when the Frenchman removed his shackles from his wrists and ankles. He sighed in relief and drinks all the fresh air he could while looking warily at France who might attack him again, he really should not visit this country again, he should assign one of his apprentice in this country to avoid this stupid man.
"France, the love potion you had made is probably stirring every possible character that can make that stupid American react differently to know what America possibly would not like…" Cupid explained it slowly as if France is a stupid man, more idiotic than idiots, you know, he should suggests to Zeus a law that should arrests any person who has no stupidity limit.
"oh…. QUEL? Why would it do that when it should be making them more in love? Cupidon! L'amour is on stake here!" Cupid sighs in exasperation. And shook his head tiredly.
"France, love is not something so superficial and you should know about it. You're the country of fucking love! Love is something least expected. If the potion settle on something that America really love then that's just pointless because if he didn't like something about England, bless his soul, then would he leave him? Sometimes, it takes all the things you aren't fond about of that person to make you see how in love you truly are. If you accepted him just the way he is then that's true love." France nearly cried at how true that is and how silly he is if he didn't see it! Oh, how silly indeed - he feel so silly and beautiful.
"I'm so sorry, Cupidon! I didn't know!" Cupid nodded and France sobbed at his feet.
"Yes, you should be!" Cupidon reprimanded as he carefully laid France on the X-like wood and tied him with the shackles he had been tied with.
"I… I know and I-I'm sorry! Je suis tellement désolé!" France sobbed with great sadness that when he finally heard the click of something being locked and a smell of burning metal, he cried even more because he's really scared shitless now.
"Now, now, France, it's time for me to take my revenge." Cupid grinned maniacally as he held the Feather Dust and never did France thought that Feather Dust could be so scary and intimidating.
Oh sweet, revenge is so sweet.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
Then a pained laughter echoed throughout the world as gleeful one followed it.
France will be missed.
I think…
~Mon Ami~
America wonders if he's cursed or just plain unlucky or if he offended some time of God that made him so unfortunate. He's hungry and tired and sleepy and there's a crazy Brit clinging on his arm laughing with things he really can't see. He wonders if he really did something wrong. Thinking about it… he may have done something… No, it had helped everyone… maybe that time when… No, his brother had loved that gift… maybe it's that… No, Iggy didn't seem angry with him just confuse.
In fine, he seems perfectly good. So why in the fuck's name is he being bullied by life? Why does life works in such a weird way that makes him looks so pathetic?
America sighed sulkily as he watched England speak so freely, so happy and carefree - something he had not seen in such a long time. The England he knows now is too strict, too overbearing, too tense and distant to anyone - not letting anyone even America in, not gain, after that event, not anymore. But this England, this is someone who had been that man who had taken care of him, someone who had that special smile ready to offer for him and him alone, this is the man he had lost when he gained his independence, this is England - the man he had missed so much.
"Oh, and that time, do you remember that time, lad? That time when America thought there's a monster under his bed and slept with me for three years until I told him that real men isn't afraid of silly monster! That was bloody brilliant of me!" England's laughter seems strained and fond and nostalgic, as if he was going to cry but he didn't. There are no tears nor trembling lips, just a heart running back to the past that the mind had thrown him into. America smiled and, England stopped his laughter in surprise, holds the Brit's hands fondly in his.
"America?"
"It's okay, England, it's okay…"
"What do you mean?" England's confused gaze lingered on the American's blue ones and America smiled softly at him. England is just too cute sometimes.
"England… I… I …" America leans in a bit to caress the man's soft cheeks and…
"Bonjour mon ami! How merveilleux of meeting you here! Honhonhon!"
Oh, wonderful, the frog is now a moment-blocker! America glared at France hoping for him to get the fucking message and leave. They were just about to- halt America! Were you just eager to admit that you two are going.. going to… Oh for fuck sake!
"Help us already you fucking pervert!" England looked at America, still unsure of what he was about to do. England looked up to France and smiled gratefully - France almost cry at England's innocent appreciative face that he only get when under a spell.
"Oh, merci ciel merveilleux! je vous remercie!" On second thought, France did cry after that beautiful event. Let's not forget how he had been tortured by Cupid who had fled away from his house.
He had been stretched, whipped, tickled and buried from sole to neck in the ground but he's too beautiful for that and so he escaped! Not even pain can hold him down if t means seeing the progress of his marvelous work!
"FRANCE! Help us already!" He might be imagining the American boy's flush face or maybe he didn't, did he?
"Did I interrupt something, Amerique?" America blushed redder and glared at France with a what-do-you-think-glare, France smirked. Oh.
"Anyway, here's a ladder. Au revoir, mon petit lapin! Something had come up and I got to go!" France run off to the sun set with a kiss blown towards them which America makes sure not to graze even their personal air. Who knows what disease that flying kiss might have? He shudders at the thought as he helps the Brit out of the hole.
"So… what now?" America blinked at the question of the Brit and smile.
"Shall we continue our little date?" England smiled and took America's offered hand with his dainty ones and blushes some more.
What a great day he will have by the end of the day, he knows he would, he swears it on the queen's lovely name.
~Mon Ami~
England's smile widen and America's laughter grew louder as they enjoy their little date without any interruption from any crazy nations out there. They shared ice cream and even ride the Ferris Wheel and even had their fortune told to them.
"Hey, what do you mean your true love is just besides you?" America asked himself out loud as he read the fortune cookie again.
"What do you mean I'm going to have the love of my life on the eleventh month of the year?" England tilted his head cutely and pouted, "The cookie is stupid. It's the end of November already. What a dolt."
"Yeah! Oh, hey! A hotdog stand! Let's go, Iggy!" England watched their hands tightened around each other and blushes some more. America is quite an splendid date, he must say.
"Thank you, America!" America stopped his running and turned slowly at England catching a fond smile on his lovely face.
"What for?" England squeezes America's hand sweetly and pecked his cheek softly, America's blue eyes widen and he flushes a bit and touches his cheek unsurely.
"For showing me that you're worth the time loving." America's gaze softened, he almost forgot why he even bothered with the date because of how joyful the day is.
He can still feel the lingering softness of England's lips on his cheek.
"It was so warm…" England looked at him, confused on what he is saying. America's face couldn't have been redder but it did because heroes can be redder than red! Right? Hahaha…haha.. ha.. right?
"I mean, the day is so warm today, I don't know why."
A particularly cold wind blow by and silence lingered around them.
"I mean… Look! A cotton candy stall! Let's go, Iggy!"
Thankfully, there is a stall who sold cotton candy or he would be more humiliated. God, why is he being punished like this?
England smiles gently at America and leads the way for the flustered man. His eyes twinkling softly, it was so green and charming and beautiful. America smiled back.
"Come on then lad…"
The Brit's hand is so warm too. Their hands fit too perfectly, America wonders why.
~Mon Ami~
So, I'm still alive, just busy. Review keeps me writing! Please leave some for me! :D
Adios, todo el mundo!
I'm not Spanish… T's Google translate and I'm Filipino. Sorry for any mistake there, folks!
