A/N: There is a bit of cursing in this story. Just letting you guys know that I may sprinkle some colorful language in the upcoming chapter. However, I will only do it if I feel a character would genuinely react that way and I will make sure they come from a place of authenticity.
In the context of this story, "Anh" is a Vietnamese term of endearment for a man in a romantic relationship while "Em" is the female equivalent.
Also, this is my first chapter in like three years. I just started outlining the story and realized how much I missed it. Hopefully, I will be able to keep the chapters coming. I promise they all won't be this long.
Early Fall 2005
Estella and Eduardo Fernandez's bodega is an inviting place with its bilingual orange banner and a fresh array of vegetables and fruits located near the entrance. Inside, the bodega is cramped with unrefrigerated egg cartons lining up the windows, bananas and other fruit hanging from hooks, short aisles of canned goods, bags, and boxes. Behind the register are boxes of medicine, cigarette boxes, and a hot chocolate machine (that still works). On the side of the register is a small delicatessan area where the Fernández family serve various Central American dishes. The bodega is complete with refrigerated and frozen food at the side opposite of the register. This hodgepodge of goods deceptively carelessly placed only adds to the bodega's charm.
Alex Fernandez hurriedly walked out of the bodega. He nearly knocked into an older man with graying hair. In an attempt to not physically run into the man, Alex spun around and his loose papers flew out of his messenger bag. Gaby had warned him to make sure his papers were secure in that worn-out bag with the loose pockets after she lost some of papers while running for a train one time. The man angrily yelled something Yiddish to him. Alex could not be sure, but he guessed they were some choice words.
"Alejandro!" yelled Estella Fernandez, a Latina woman. She was in her mid-to-late forties and did not make too much of a fuss with her hair and make-up going instead for practicality. However, she still gave off an aura of dignity and natural beauty that could not be restrained. Her face expressed an interesting contrast of amusement and motherly concern. "What are you doing on the floor, hurry, pick up your papers! And you forgot to eat breakfast, hijo!"
"It's ok Mama, I'll go and get a bagel from a cart of something," answered Alex with his own mix of amusement and frustration over looking like a fool.
"Alejandro, that's not real food!" yelled out Mrs. Canela, an elderly lady who shopped at the bodega every week since the Fernandezes first opened their doors. "What kind of son are you to make your Mama worry so much!"
"It's ok Mrs. Canela. I always get a coffee and a banana to go with it."
"Aye, you have bananas at the bodega! What a waste of money!" replied Mrs. Canela.
This had become a routine with Alex in the morning, sans the papers dropping.
"Hey Prince Charming, dropped some papers?" said a tall Latino man in his thirties who was passing by.
"Oh, hey Roberto. I just dropped some papers," said Alex more annoyed at himself than anything.
"You need help picking them up?"
"Nah, I got the last of them, but thanks."
"What are you doing up so early, Roberto?" asked Estella. Estella knew Roberto worked long nights as a drag performer at various bars in the City and usually wasn't up before 10 a.m. Alex had liked Roberto the minute he had met him. Roberto had innocently flirted with him when Alex visited his parents during college. Alex could not help but be flattered that a good looking guy like Roberto thought Alex was cute, even if Alex wasn't gay himself. He also appreciated that Roberto would help Estella and Eduardo Fernandez around the store and keep an eye of them once Gaby and Alex went to college.
"I'm on my way to the Bronx. I'm meeting my Mama. We're going over wedding plans."
"So nice that you're letting your mama help you out like that," said Estella.
"Yeah, so nice. Roberto and David have been together for only one year and are getting married already," said Mrs. Canela.
"Oh, Mrs. Canela, we're not getting 'married', but having a commitment ceremony, you know we can't get married in New York," answered Roberto.
"Si, I know. But, New York will decide that in court, right?"
"My fiancé told me the 'Appellate Division' will make a decision some time later this year, but I shouldn't hold my breath. Nice of that Asian judge who said we had to have same-sex marriage though." Roberto's fiancé was a City University of New York law grad who recently took the Bar Exam and got a job at South Brooklyn Legal Services.
"Hey Alex! Looking sharp. Is that a new suit? Oh hey Mrs. Canela, Roberto, Estella," said Max Frazier.
"Hey Max," they said.
"Hey Mr. Frazier," said Alex.
"Alex, I told you, just call me Max," smiled Max.
"Anyway, you only dated one year and you know you want to be together. Alex, you've been with Tina forever and still aren't engaged. Shame on you for making your Mama worry!" Mrs. Canela said sure that this was her business. She had been living in Fort Greene for forty years now, and she watched Estella and Eduardo work hard bringing up Alex and Gaby. She wanted to make sure they got the fruits of their labor.
Max and Estella exchanged uncomfortable glances.
"Mrs. Canela! Honestly," said Estella.
"Alejandro, hurry up and catch your train," Eduardo Fernandez calmly said. Eduardo had exited the bodega and saw Mrs. Canela talking to Alex. He knew he needed to assist in Alex's own exit.
"Nice seeing you Max, Mrs. Canela, Roberto. I'll see you later, Papa y Mama!" Alex said as he ran towards the G train.
As Alex stood in the subway, listening to his iPod Nano, having his back bounce off his neighbor's belly, he couldn't help but think how comforting the bodega and his neighborhood was. Then he thought about what Mrs. Canela said about him getting married to Tina. Alex could not help but smile. He wanted Tina to have dinner at the bodega some time this week.
EARLY AFTERTOON
Tina Nguyen was filming a tall transgender woman outside a Chelsea Piers bathroom. The wind harshly blew their hair as Tina was preparing her camera. Andromeda was mouthing words in front of two gendered bathroom stalls, preparing her statements. Tina noticed on-lookers were giggling and making comments about the group of transwomen and transmen, who surrounded her. Any apprehension Tina felt with filming the scene went away as a fire in the pit of her belly exploded. She wanted to film this scene. This is a point-of-view that needs to be expressed.
Tina started becoming more interested in policy intimidation and bullying when she befriended a transgender lawyer who asked Tina if she could make a "Know Your Rights" training video for visiting clients. This evolved into a full-blown documentary once Tina secured funding. This topic was a sore subject for Alex as he was part of the other side. It also hit too close to home because he was becoming disenfranchised with his assignments.
A transwoman came up to Tina and carefully tied her hair in a braid so her bangs would stop flying in her face. This was Calliope, who Tina befriended months ago and had already shot some scenes for her documentary. This level of comfort was reassuring to Tina.
"Thank you Calliope," said Tina appreciatively.
"It's nothing, I could tell you were getting annoyed with the wind." Calliope then ran back to her spot among the other transwomen and transmen to block the shot.
Tina smiled. Even though this had been a scene of intimidation for many of her subjects, she loved Chelsea Piers. She loved the bustle of bikers, runners, tired locals sunbathing, customers at the local eateries, and simple pedestrians walking by. She would sometimes come here with Alex whenever they had a day off together to just relax and enjoy one another's company.
Her camera was in order, and she had the shot she wanted. "Ok Andromeda, before I shoot, are you comfortable with what you're going to say?"
"Yes, I think I have it now," Andromeda said still looking apprehensive.
"Remember, just speak from your own experiences. You don't have to pretend to make it grandeur or to downplay anything. Just be yourself. We want your story, your truth, nobody else's."
Andromeda smiled, looking a little less tense. Tina's studies and experience have taught her that one of the most important tenants of filming a subject is to gain their trust and allow them to shape the story. She was careful to make sure she was not invoking her own biases and perspective during an actual subject testimonial. Especially when it was a subject regarding a community she was not a part of.
Despite her reassurances that Andromeda should speak from her heart, Tina hoped this take would be the final one. She feared that she would be running late to a shopping appointment with Gaby and Lenni. The first few takes were mired by people obliviously walking into the shot despite Andromeda's friends haphazardly blocking a small space for them to film and Andromeda's penchant for speaking too fast and losing her place in her off-the-cuff statements about police intimidation and enforcement of bathroom.
"Ok, action," said Tina with a tinge of authority that was no longer new for her.
Andromeda closed her eyes, then looked at the camera. She looked like a totally different person. She now had the face of a brave warrior shaking off the shackles of oppression. She was ready to fight.
"Everyone needs to use the bathroom, and they deserve access to a safe restroom! However, what bathroom do I go into? I am a woman! But people see me as a man. If I go to a woman's bathroom, where I feel most comfortable, I some times get women screaming at me or have the police come and either give me a ticket or arrest me for posing a threat. I ain't here to threaten anybody. I just want to use the bathroom in peace. I can't tell you how many times I've been to this bathroom and looked at the traffic to make sure too many people aren't in there for my own safety. And once I am in there, I try to hurry the fuck up because the last thing I need is some scared woman screaming at me or getting the police. I'm too fucking scared to use the men's restroom. One time I went to a men's restroom at a restaurant and these guys came in, surrounded me, pushed me against the wall, called me all sorts of nasty things, and then almost jumped me. I only went in there because I was told I had to use the men's restroom by a manager. I was once threatened by a police officer that I would be charged with a sex crime and be labeled a sex offender if I went to a women's restroom if a little girl was in there. Again, I tell you, I only want to use the bathroom! I want to do a private act that it was designed for. I'm not there to check anyone out."
Andromeda's comfort level was obviously at the highest it had been all day. She started sassing the camera and pointing out the gendered bathroom doors.
On-lookers and several passerby started to crowd. Some started rumbling, both in support and in opposition, but Andromeda's friends quickly hushed them while others self-restrained themselves as they knew Tina was filming. The shot was perfect. The clouds had covered the sun just enough so there wouldn't be any glare. There was enough background activity going on to make the shot look active.
Tina was excitement could not be contained and she betrayed a hint of a smile. This was the take she knew Andromeda wanted, and this was the shot she wanted.
Tina suddenly felt the crowd was too quiet.
"And the fucking police..." Andromeda suddenly had a worried look on her face.
"Excuse me, miss, you can't shoot here," said a stern officer who Tina made out to be in his mid-forties.
"Yes, I can. This is a public space. I am allowed to shoot here and I don't need a permit." Tina said calmly, not breaking eye contact with the two officers. She was well-versed in where she was and was not allowed to shoot. "It is only me, a camera, and one person. I don't have a large crew nor am I creating a hazard or going into private areas compromising the privacy of the public."
The officers looked annoyed. One of them crossed their arms. The other officer looked a little uneasy about the altercation. Tina recognized him at a police function Alex took her to. She wondered if he recognized her in-kind.
"You're wrong. You are creating a haphazard situation. You're making a scene," the other officer said forcefully.
Tina looked at the crowd that gathered. It was much larger than it had been when she was actually filming. The usually loud-spoken Andromeda was unusually quiet. Tina looked up and saw one officer grab Andromeda and lead her to a less crowded area near the bathrooms but still within eyesight. Tina took her camera and started filming Andromeda.
"Didn't you hear me!" The officer who Tina did not recognize screamed.
"This crowd is here because you began to make a scene. If you'd go away, the crowd will disperse. Anyway, I have a right to be here."
The officer Tina did recognize took her partner aside and pointed to the officer talking to Andromeda. Tina did not take the camera off of Andromeda. Andromeda's friends started getting antsy and began to yell at the officers to let them shoot. Then they pointed to other people at the Pier who were shooting their own videos with their cameras. Members of the crowd started chanting to let her shoot.
Tina was starting to get worried as crowd support can backfire and make the officers more inclined to make arrests. However, a moment later, the officers grabbed the third officer away from Andromeda. The officer Tina recognized winked at her, smiled, and walked off with the others.
Tina went up to Andromeda and asked her if she was ok. Andromeda looked at the ground. She looked up at the sky, and she could see tears forming. Then Andromeda hardened, looked at the crowd and then back at Tina. "Ok, you said you wanted to walk and shoot over there?" Andromeda smiled and pointed to the pier itself.
"Yeah, let's do it," Tina smiled. Half of the crowd applauded and dispersed going about the rest of their business.
The clouds shifted and sun shone a light on the Piers. Tina was worried that there might be a glare, but she was happy to get the much-needed warmth.
MIDAFTERNOON
Alex was at the 90th precinct in Williamsburg. He was busy over looking over key items of a counterfeit sting he and other detectives had uncovered. He spent four hours writing detailed reports of each situation on how he obtained the evidence to make sure they would be admissible in court. He knew it would be at the utmost importance to ensure that none of these items would fall under the exclusionary rule (that is evidence deemed inadmissible in court because they were obtained illegally). Alex had a reputation in his branch for his meticulous reports. All of his years solving crimes with the Ghostwriter team prepared him well when it came to finding evidence and not letting any detail get past him.
In this particular case, Alex and other detectives discovered a ring of business owners who made a substantial profit by selling counterfeit designer merchandise. Although the Patrol Bureau usually handles cases like these, this happened to be a more complicated case that required further investigation.
One patrolling officer discovered a simple counterfeit transaction by chance. Usually, the NYPD would turn a blind eye into these sorts of cases, but there was something about this particular transaction that caught the police officer's eye. At this particular stand on Mott St., the officer noticed a group of tourists yelling at the cashier. Their necks were noticeably bright red. Yelling and screaming was not unusual in New York City, but this one seemed to have the potential to turn violent. One tourist grabbed the cashier by his collar, while another employee grabbed a baseball bat. As the officer broke up the fight before it became serious, the tourists told him that they had bought bottles of Chanel No. 5 and Calvin Klein's CK One Cologne from this very stand which gave them all rashes. Furthermore, although the perfume smelled like the brand the tourists thought they were buying, the perfume had an intoxicating effect, which resulted in a trip to the emergency room. The cashier and his co-worker turned out to be the stand owner and his son.
The police officer then started questioning the stand owner in the back about his merchandise. He kept insisting that his products were authentic. However, the officer, going on instinct, decided to call back-up and confiscate the perfumes. Before he could grab a bottle to investigate further, he noticed that the stand owner's wife was furiously talking on the phone while nervously glancing at the officer. Further interrogations at the precinct were not fruitful as the stand owner and his wife called their attorney, and they were not cooperating. However, their son, at a separate interrogation and before he invoked his Sixth Amendment right to counsel (after realizing he had that right), said that his father and mother were forced to sell the products or risk harm to their business.
A few days later, the stand closed shop. This lead to thee Detective Bureau getting involved as the son's comments hinted at some sort of conspiracy and small business intimidation. Although Alex was working at the Brooklyn precinct, he had a reputation for being able to gather enough evidence to at least bring forth charges of the selling of counterfeit goods during his time as a police officer that the lower Manhattan offices asked if he could investigate. Owing the Manhattan officer a favor, Deputy Inspector McQuade reluctantly pulled Alex out of the bloodied, half-naked Brooklyn woman running in Manhattan case.
Two months of intensive police work later; the detectives finally compiled enough evidence to arrest three families. With enough witnesses willing to testify that those families of thugs used intimidation tactics to induce them to buy and sell the toxic perfume, the Bureau recommend the case to the District Attorney.
Although Alex had no doubt that they needed to stop the selling of such products to consumers for public health reasons, he was uneasy about the case. First, only a small percentage of those bottles were actually toxic. The rest were just counterfeit merchandise, in name. The products smelled the same as the original. Secondly, he felt that the so-called families of thugs were mostly regular distributors of counterfeit material that paid those stand-owners well and had no idea there some of the products they normally sold would be defective this time around when it regularly didn't harm anyone. Thirdly, the stand owners were only willing to cooperate once the police scared them with deportation and other things that they could not really follow-through. However, this sort of puffery was sometimes needed to get these cases moving. No, Alex had no doubt that crimes were committed, and he knew that the justice should be served. However, he could not help but be sympathetic to the small business dealings that benefitted families and small business owners as the people who would really benefit from these arrests were big corporations.
After three years working as a police officer and now as a detective, Alex felt these thoughts creeping into his mind more often than before. It was not as if this should have been a surprise. Studying criminology had taught him that these many policies were created to punish the most vulnerable populations which perpetuated social inequality. However, studying it on a theoretical level was quite different than seeing things first-hand.
LATE AFTERNOON
In a tiny and cluttered consignment shop, Gaby, Lenni, and Tina were wading through racks of clothes.
"Try this one on, Lenni!" Gaby said excitedly. "You'll look hot in this dress."
"That one has polka dots," said Lenni dismissively. She gave the dress no further thought.
"What's wrong with polka dots?" asked Gaby looking closely at the dress.
"It makes me think of that 1950s nostalgia those Bettie Page types wear," said Lenni. Looking through a rank of dresses. "Nothing wrong with that, but that's not my style."
"Fine, I'll try it on for myself. Nobody could mistake me for a 1950s Bettie Page gal," said Gaby amused. She rushed to the small dressing room.
"I don't know about that, you have the ass and boobs," said Lenni laughing. Tina giggled.
Tina wondered if that was just Gaby's way to being able to shop for herself when they were supposed to be picking out an outfit for Lenni's first date in over a year.
"Oh, I like this!" Lenni exclaimed. Lenni grabbed a shiny colorful jacket that gave the impression it was patched together with various crazy designs. Tina couldn't help but think it was totally Lenni.
"Ugh" screamed Gaby, "this dress looks awful on me!"
"Hey, eyes back here, how do I look?" Tina was sitting crisscrossed on the floor of the dressing room in-between Gaby and Leni. Tina couldn't help but be jealous of Lenni's outfit. It looked totally edgy and cool while accentuating her body. Her body wasn't curvy the way Gaby's was, but her taller frame with longer torso allowed Lenni to accessorize and layer in ways Tina could not get away with.
"Wow, that's hot," said Gaby.
"Yeah, I didn't think all those pieces would work together, but they totally do," said Tina.
"Yeah, if he feels the same way we do, you wouldn't be wearing it long," joked Gaby as she took a pile of discarded clothing and put each one on just to peel them one-by-one.
The three exploded into laughter.
"Excuse me, are you almost done in there?" asked another customer.
"Yeah, just give us a second," said Gaby breathlessly from all of the laughter. "I like this store, but they need more than 3 tiny dressing rooms."
"Well, it's not Marshalls," replied Lenni.
Tina grabbed one of nicer button-ups Lenni had rejected it and handed it to Gaby. "Why don't you try this on?"
"Thanks, Tina, thanks for the most beige shirt you could find," joked Gaby.
"Excuse me, but that's the most beige shirt Lenni could find," answered Tina.
"Hey! I thought it would look good on me!" replied Lenni.
"Anyway, it might look good on you," said Tina.
"My boobs aren't going to fit into this shirt," said Gaby.
Lenni looked at the two of them amused while still checking out her outfit in the mirror.
Gaby tried buttoning her shirt to no avail and then threw it down with the rest of the pile.
"Man, my boobs hurt," whined Gaby.
Lenni absent-mindedly said, "Maybe you're pregnant." Lenni stared at herself at the mirror, checking out her ass, and noticed Gaby's vacant expression reflecting back on her.
Gaby silently plopped down.
"Oh Gaby…" said Tina. Tina crouched down and hugged Gaby.
"No, I was just kidding!" yelled Lenni as she also crouched down to Gaby's level.
"No, I'm late and my boobs are so sore and bigger than usual!"
"It's your imagination," said Lenni. "You've been late before and your boobs are always big."
"I know my body, my boobs are never sore," Gaby started crying.
"But you're not even having sex with anyone," said Lenni.
" I am," said Gaby.
"Why haven't you told us you're seeing someone," asked Lenni, as Tina put Gaby's head on her shoulder.
"Are you done yet?" screamed the same woman.
"Jesus, there's try bothering the other dressing rooms!" yelled Gaby.
"Come on," said Tina.
Back in Lenni's apartment above the bodega, the three women were in the bathroom.
"Ok, in five minutes, we'll find out," said Tina.
The three women just stared at each other.
"So, who is it?" asked Lenni.
"Some guy I started seeing a few months ago," said Gaby exasperatedly.
"Why haven't you told us?" asked Tina. Tina couldn't help but feel at ease. Gaby never hid something like that from her. Why did she do it now?
"Because, he's married," said Gaby.
Lenni and Tina stared at Gaby for a while trying not to betray a look of shock and judgment.
"Look, whatever you guys have to say to me about that, I've already said a million times to myself, but I couldn't help myself," said Gaby defensively.
"You didn't use a condom?!" yelled Lenni.
"No, I did! Or at least I thought I did, we were really drunk," said Gaby too numb to really cry anymore. Gaby was thinking
Before Lenni could say anything, Tina shot Lenni a look to not say anymore. They sat in silence for a minute. Gaby's head racing. Gaby was trying to remember whether she had used the condom the last time she had sex. Not able to take the silence anymore, Gaby said, "I've already decided that I'm having an abortion if I'm pregnant."
Lenni and Tina looked at Gaby and nodded in support. They knew it was too early to have that conversation. Lenni and Tina both did not want to dissuade Gaby from having an abortion but they wanted Gaby to be sure of her decision if it came to that.
Tina felt disgusted that she could not relieve the tension some how. She tried not to look at Gaby too much. Gaby self-consciously stared at Lenni's bathroom floor. Lenni stood at the corner with her hands in her pockets not looking at any particular direction. Tina stood staring at the pregnancy stick looking for a sign.
"Just letting you know, Sandra is happy with her decision to get an abortion," said Lenni, "She spoke to me recently and said if she had to do it all over again, she would. She was in no place to raise a child." Lenni was referring to one of her writing partners who had an abortion two years ago.
Gaby smiled at Lenni. Tina smiled at Lenni and then smiled Gaby. "Listen, no matter what, you have us and we'll be there for you."
Gaby smiled at Tina, who then smiled at Lenni, who then smiled at Gaby. The three of them burst into spontaneous laughter. They weren't sure what they were laughing at or whether they were even laughing at the same thing. However, at this moment, Gaby knew everything was going to be ok.
Gaby smelled the rice and beans her father and mother were selling downstairs. She was suddenly very hungry.
"Ok, I think time's up," said Gaby.
Gaby, Lenni, and Tina walked into the bodega.
"Hey guys, this is a pleasant surprise. What brings you here?" asked Estella. "You just missed your father, he's picking up a some produce. Wouldn't you know it, we're out of all sorts of things. I think that juice craze is coming back."
"I'm starving," yelled Gaby as she hugged her mom.
Lenni were hungry as well. Lenni suddenly worried if her father would see the negative pregnancy test in the trash bin, but then thought nothing of it. There was no shame if he saw it. She'll just say it was hers. Right now, her mind was on some rice and beans.
LATE EVENING
Alex Fernández walked out of the 90th Precinct police station in Williamsburg. He could not wait to go to the Bodega and just plop into bed. One week ago, he had moved into his new flat in Prospect Heights from his parents' bodega in Fort Greene. Before temporarily moving back to his parents' bodega, he lived with two fellow police officers in a small two and a half-bedroom apartment in Park Slope. However, his new apartment was a scene from Hoarders at the moment, so he often spent the night in his old familiar room at the bodega.
He flipped his phone on and dialed "2" on his speed dial.
"Hey, Anh!" said Tina Nguyen, Alex's girlfriend for the past year. They had casually and seriously dated on and off from middle school, until two years ago where they non-verbally decided they were done exploring other people and committed.
Alex did not really have anything to say. He just wanted to hear her voice. He inhaled, smelling the fine Williamsburg air. He looked around and noticed that the place was changing fast. It was already changing, but he was noticing more white affluent people living in the area. He noticed in the past few years of working in the Williamsburg precinct that there were a lot less languages being spoken all at once. It was only this past May where the New York City Council passed large-scale rezoning policies that made parts of the North Side and Greenpoint unaffordable to those who had once lived there. There was still hammering noises going on due to the development of these areas.
"Hey, Em," said Alex, a little exasperated.
"What's going on?" asked Tina, a little distractedly.
"I'm just getting off of work."
"I can tell. You sound exhausted."
"What are you up to?
"I'm at home, editing the pieces of the Sassy Street Walk that I shot for today. Just spoke to my mom and asked how your new place was working out."
"Ha, what did you say?"
"I just said, 'he probably doesn't know, he's been so busy with work that he's been sleeping at the bodega.'"
Alex laughed. "What was your mom's reaction?"
"Honestly, I think she was happy. She said you needed to go home to a nice home-cooked meal."
"Mothers," they both said.
"Anyway, how was it today?"
"It was…empowering," Tina said. "We were outside the gendered bathroom stalls at Chelsea Piers, and I was interviewing Andromeda about the police harassment she faced and how other transgender individuals are regularly harassed and arrested for using the 'wrong' bathroom when some cops overheard us and started giving us a hard time. Andromeda got verbally attacked by a cop in private and I was told to stop shooting. In the end, nothing really happened. I just continued the interview elsewhere."
"Who were the cops?" Alex said worried. He felt a surge of protectiveness wave over him. This was something Tina had told him to check as he needed to stop thinking of her as someone who needed his protection. But old habits die hard. Alex had been, what he thought, playing the protective figure since he became an older brother and it seeped into his relationship with Tina, even when they were only friends in middle and elementary school respectively. To say this was a male paternal instinct would be simplifying it. Alex was the same way to Hector. Even though Hector was an out gay man, Alex saw him as a cis-gender man. Alex's protectiveness was more innate and more self-centered in his thinking. He felt he had the goods to play that role and it would be unnatural for him to not act on it. He worked to keep it in check, but it was Alex's innate nature to be protective. Tina, for her part, loved that about Alex and enjoyed feeling safe in his presence. She just wanted to make sure he saw her as an equal as well.
"They were nobody," said Tina reassuringly. She, in her nature, did not want Alex to worry and be burdened with something that was not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. Alex told her to check that as he had told her to stop minimizing her experiences and share it with him. This would prove to be a bit ironic as Alex initially shut down and minimized his own experiences when he first joined the force in order to protect his loved-ones.
"Tina, maybe I can call someone at their precinct."
"No Alex don't," said Tina. "Remember the last time you behind my back? One, nothing happened. Two, I told you the truth. It worked out. Plus I think one of the officers recognized me from that policeman's event we went to in Chelsea. He made sure we continued the shoot."
"Ok good," said Alex satisfied. In the past, Alex would get jealous. Not because he feared Tina would like someone better, but he used to be territorial about his place as the person who took care of business for his loved ones. However, years of being with Tina mellowed him out.
There was a long silence. It was actually about ten seconds, but that seems forever on the phone.
"Hey Alex, listen, I'm sorry if I sounded too harsh on the police again. I know you guys do very important and needed work. You just have to understand what it's like for people who aren't really doing anything wrong but are easy targets."
"No, I understand. We talk about this all the time. You know how I feel about having to do these sorts of cases. I agree with you for the most part. Just don't forget, cops are people too, and they don't always think about how they are enforcing policies that only serve to target the poor. They're just doing their job and they're not that far off from poverty themselves."
"I know," Tina replied. She hoped Alex understood she was not criticizing him or his work. She was very proud of him despite all the reactions from her current subjects that she was dating a cop. After giving them a brief description of how they met, how long they've been dating, and what he was like, they seemed to approve of him. Tina suspected that after months of interviews and gaining the trust of her circle of trans individuals, they felt a little protective of her, which she thought was ironic considering she felt she needed to protect them while they were participating in her documentary. Funnily enough, some times all she had to do was show them a picture of him to get near-instant approval.
"How was the paper work?" asked Tina. Alex and Tina were now close enough where they knew each other's work.
"Exhausting, but I'm finally done. I was calling to see if you wanted to grab dinner and a drink."
"Dinner at 10 p.m.?"
"Sure, why not?" asked Alex. He could not help but give his signature devilish smirk. This was Alex's best method of persuasion with Tina with a pretty good success rate. Even though she could not see him at the moment, he felt that by doing it, it would somehow come across audibly, as if by osmosis.
"Ok. The usual place?" said Tina with more enthusiasm than she anticipated. The truth is that she was feeling antsy after editing video footage for five hours and would have liked nothing more than seeing Alex and having a vodka tonic.
"Of course."
Alex and Tina sat at the bar. Alex was picking at the remnants of his Irish fries. Tina laughed to herself. Some things never change. It doesn't matter what it was, if there was something resembling food in front of Alex, he'll just keep eating.
"You know what I was thinking about today while doing my paper work and wading through all those boxes? How Ghostwriter would have been useful right about now." Alex laughed.
Tina, sipped on her vodka tonic. "I know! He would have been really helpful in getting me the badge numbers of those officers that tried to stop me today."
They sat in momentary silence. They, like the rest of the team, often brought up Ghostwriter casually. And just as quickly, they would move on to another subject. When he first left, the team obsessed over his whereabouts. Even in college, they would have long, drawn-out discussions over where would have gone or where he came from. Now, they just talk about him as if he was an old childhood friend who they had lost contact with. They could not take the meta-physical philosophical discussions anymore. At least, not Alex and Tina.
"Alex?"
"Yeah?" said Alex chewing on a fry bit with ranch dressing.
Tina wanted to tell him that Gaby had a pregnancy scare today. She thought this was something Alex should know, but she knew Gaby had to be the one to tell him. She was starting to fear that they were not as close as they used to be. She always envied how close Alex and Gaby were growing up in comparison to her own relationship with her older brother, Tuan. The funny thing is that Tina never thought to make sure she had a close relationship with her little sister Linda.
"When was the last time you spoke to Gaby?" asked Tina apprehensively.
"I don't know, two days ago over the phone. Why?" answered a puzzled Alex. He started to play with his plastic fork.
"Was it a real conversation?" asked Tina, more intently.
"I mean, we were just shooting the shit, you know. We just talked about the usual. Why?"
"I think we always make sure we spend enough time together, and maybe you two forget to make time to spend together," answered Tina. She slightly looked away once Alex gave her eye contact. She realized how that must have looked, so she purposefully looked at Alex.
"Why are you so worried? Did something happen to Gaby?" Alex's expression transitioned from mere curiosity to worry.
"No, it's just, I see you guys growing a little more distant, and since I spend a lot of time with both of you, I want to make sure you guys are still close. I don't want you and Gaby to stop being so close to one another," Tina answered not betraying anything that had happened earlier that day.
"Why are you so worried about that? Gaby and I are fine. We don't have to talk to each other to know what's going on," said Alex, meaning every word that he said.
"That's only because I update the both of you, or your parents do," said Tina, rubbing Alex's arm.
"It's not a big deal, Tina," said Alex. He rubbed Tina's arm back.
"Just do it, ok? Make plans to see Gaby," said Tina. She gave Alex a look to express that she was not relenting any time soon.
"Alright. Alright, I will," said an amused Alex. "Geez, you're tough." Alex gazed at her and gave her his signature smirk.
"Well, you're holding back. I'm sure if you really wanted to interrogate me, you'd get a lot more," said Tina flirtatiously not breaking her eye contact with Alex.
Alex grabbed Tina's hand and kissed her.
"Eeew, you taste like bacon and ranch dressing," said Tina, lightly pushing him away but betraying a smile.
"That's the best flavor combination ever! Why are you complaining?" joked Alex.
As they exited the bar, Alex and Tina embraced and kissed. The nights were getting cooler and both welcomed the embrace.
Unfortunately they were going in opposite directions.
"Come on, Em, come home with me," said Alex as he swung Tina around and pulled her back into his embrace.
"Anh, you know I would like nothing more, but I really have to get up early tomorrow and film more interviews. Plus, I have to meet with the grant committee about progress on the Latino/Latina Action Committee film. All my stuff is back at home," said Tina, slightly enjoying the pain of desire she was causing in Alex.
"Oh man, what's the point of having a place to myself if you can't just come over anytime we want?"
"One, you're going to the bodega tonight. And two, you just have to be patient. We already made plans this weekend. Remember, I'll stay over all weekend, and then in two weeks, you'll be on vacation and I'll stay over all vacation, I promise."
"Ok, but we need to have dinner before this weekend."
"I thought that was already a given." Tina smirked and kissed Alex on the cheek. She knew Alex couldn't resist her smirk.
Before Alex could say anything, Tina started going down her direction; turning around and giving him one more exaggerated wave. Alex stood still for a moment enjoying his view before he too turned around and went towards his apartment.
THE NEXT DAY
Alex was at his desk going over the details of the bloodied Brooklyn woman running in Manhattan case when he noticed Deputy Inspector McQuade standing in front of him. Deputy Inspector McQuade looked no different from when Alex first met him more than a decade ago. Maybe McQuade put on a few more pounds and his hair was grayer, but nothing else seemed different.
"Good work on the counterfeit case, Alex. It's nice to see you back at this office with some regularity," said McQuade with a strong sense of comforting familiarity.
"Thanks Deputy Inspector," replied Alex. Even after handling a few cases, Alex was new to detective work and still had the eagerness to receive positive comments on his work.
"Listen, I know didn't really want to take on that case, but you know I owed them a few favors and they really liked your work."
"It's no problem. I'm happy to help."
McQuade shot Alex a look that betrayed some bemusement.
"I remember when you were just starting out and you thought certain cases were beneath you. Those were your words, right, beneath you?"
"Well, yeah. I mean I was cracking down on public urination and prostitution."
"And counterfeiting," said McQuade with a smile.
"And counterfeiting," Alex conceded.
"Even so…you did your job and did it well."
"Yeah, well I wanted to do my job right. I figured there was a reason why those acts were illegal."
"After I had to explain it to you a few times, right?
"Right."
With some years of experience under his belt, Alex knew better than to make it known if he felt a certain case was "beneath" him.
The last time he told Deputy Inspector McQuade he felt a case was beneath him, McQuade responded with, "Alex, how many times did you kids call me up while I was in the middle of a case to bother me about your little mysteries? The Lana Barnes stalker case? The stolen $50,000 spaceship mock-up from that TV show…uh…"
"Galaxy Girl."
"Yeah, Galaxy Girl. That didn't seem like a big deal compared to the theft and arson I could have been working on, but it was important to you, no?"
"Well, yeah, but that's because my sister, Gaby, was accused of stealing a $50,000 space ship. That's different."
"For you, but in the grand scheme of things, it wasn't that important. Let's not forget that guy who was selling stolen merchandise out of his garage, or the case of the stolen painting, or the…"
"Ok, I get it. I just want to sink my teeth something that will really affect people, something that I know will change communities for the better. What's the big deal if these people sell counterfeit items? People know that these items are imitation, but what if they can't afford the real thing? Shouldn't they be allowed to feel special? Plus, it helps small businesses earn extra money."
"Even if it's illegal and it's stealing from those designers, Alex? Or are you saying that rich people aren't allowed to have justice?"
Alex did not have a quick enough response. McQuade had a point. He was just frustrated with getting all of these minor cases. He thought he'd be getting something big for all the work he had been doing.
"Look, Alex. Crimes affect people. Big or small, there's no such thing as a victimless crime.
"Let me give you an example. For a time, New York City was seen as a place where people were given free reign to do all sorts of low-level crime. These include public urination, open prostitution, shoplifting, drug possession, whatever. People thought those activities were ok because they were seen as victimless crimes. However, say you're trying to raise a family in a neighborhood and trying to teach your children the quality of life and respect for your community. How can you teach that when you see vandalism everywhere and nothing to thwart it? What about seeing public urination. Who ends up suffering? It's only pee, right? Wrong. People live in those communities and they will be the ones who have to clean up after somebody else's mess. Is it fair for them? No.
"You learn through time that without anybody reprimanding you for that behavior, that it's ok. Alex, it's about quality of life. You may want every case to be glamorous; you know drug busts, catching big-named CEOs partaking in embezzlement or some other corporate malfeasance, homicide, whatever. However, remember this, with every big case you get, you have to take dozens or more of these little cases because in the end, they matter.
"So, you see, crime no matter how big or small matter. It's important. Don't forget it."
He looked at his gold shield and his tag that said "Det. A. Fernández."
He smiled. "Yes, Lieutenant I mean…Inspector McQuade."
"Good. Now get to work."
"Listen, Alex," said McQuade. I don't always agree with the work we're doing, but the best we can do is to make sure we enforce things fairly. Maybe one day policies will change and some laws that are unfair now will be repealed. I've seen some progress, and we need good people like you on our side, otherwise, things will always be bad."
With that McQuade left Alex's desk. Alex pondered for a bit before continuing with his report. He did not quite agree with McQuade's broken windows 101 lecture he got a year ago, but he wasn't quite ready to join Tina, Gaby, and Hector's perspective that the whole damn system was a racist, sexist, classist, heteronormative exercise in capitalism.
After turning everything in, he was told to patrol, in plain-clothing, a small business section within Prospect Heights. Giving him this break was the Department's way of rewarding Alex for a job well-done.
So much for a break. Alex and his partner, Yvette, ended up chasing two twenty-something-year-olds. Once Alex and Yvette were able to keep them on the ground, they handcuffed the two men and searched them. He radioed for back-up and stood there keeping a careful eye on the duo, while another officer joined them.
His phone rang, and Yvette said she had it covered and to go ahead and take it. This was not anything she could not handle.
"Hey, Tina," said Alex.
"Hey, Alex, what's up? Break down any doors today?" asked Tina.
"No, Babe. Just your typical day of reports and patrol and what-not. How are you?" asked Alex a little too casually as he had just arrested some people.
"Since when have you started calling me 'Babe?'" asked Tina.
"You don't like it? I thought it'd be a good pet name for you," said Alex playfully, knowing that would irk her a bit.
"No, I don't like it. It's objectifying and has a misogynistic undertone," Tina joked as she quoted Clueless.
"It's only misogynistic if I don't allow you to do the same with me, so therefore it's equal opportunity objectifying…Stay down!" Alex said preempting any movement from the two arrestees. Yvette looked at Alex wondering why he had said that considering the men were already secure.
"Good point – hey, what are you doing exactly?" asked Tina.
"What do mean? I'm talking to you," said Alex mischievously. He couldn't help himself some times.
"Very funny – I mean what are you doing at this exact moment other than talking to me," asked Tina, worry creeping into her voice.
"Oh, nothing, I'm just in the middle of arresting two people for acting suspicious and having illegal firearms. So, right now, I'm talking to you, keeping an eye of them, and waiting for my backup," said Alex more seriously.
"Alex, you answered your phone in the middle of an arrest? I don't think this is standard operating procedure." Tina seriously worried if he could get in trouble for this.
"Probably not, are you going to tell on me?" Alex asked flirtatiously.
Tina chose to ignore Alex's attempts at flirting. "Did you read them their Miranda rights?" Tina asked seriously.
"Of course I did, I'm not new." Alex made a mental note to read them their Miranda rights right after this phone call in case Yvette or the third officer did not do it already. Technically, he didn't have to do it until the point of interrogation.
"Well, sorry! I was just watching your back," joked Tina, sounding more relaxed.
"How are the interviews going?" asked Alex, half-curious and half wanting to move on to another subject.
"We're starting soon. We're making sure the lighting is right and that the audio can capture her. She wants to do it near Times Square…can you imagine with all the tourists. But who am I to deny a request with my limited budget and time and all…"
Alex laughed. Then he remembered that she called him. "Hey, why did you call?"
"I wanted to see if you talked to Gaby today," asked Tina eagerly.
"Actually, I did. We're meeting for dinner next week. She invited me to watch a DVD at her place. She wants my thoughts on the movie, Mystic River. You know you were right, she sounded really happy that I called to say I wanted to hang out. Actually, I didn't realize how much I wanted to hang out with her either," Alex said earnestly.
"Oh Alex, I'm so happy!" Tina said at a higher register than she had intended.
"So, are you coming over tonight?" asked Alex, sounding as if he deserved a reward.
"To the apartment or the bodega?"
"Well, you know I'm not quite settled at the new place yet, so I'll probably be sleeping at the bodega tonight," said Alex. He was hoping she'd stay over but knew the bodega wasn't the best selling point.
"I'll have dinner with you tonight, but I probably won't be able to stay over."
"Would you change your mind if I slept at the apartment?"
"Amidst the mountains of cardboard boxes and no shower curtain? I don't think so."
"Oh come on Tina, you shouldn't feel embarrassed about my parents…"
"Alex, it's not that," said Tina half-lying. "I have a lot of work to do. I still have to edit the other ten interviews. I've been putting it off. I need to get to work and you know that all of my equipment is at my place."
Alex fell silent on the phone. He was contemplating how to persuade her to stay over.
"Listen, Alex. Let me do an all-nighter tonight after dinner, and I promise this weekend, you'll have my undivided attention."
"Ok, oh, my back-up is here, I have to go…honey," said Alex adding a mocking tone to honey.
"Bye, Alex," laughed Tina as rolled her eyes when she hung up the phone. He could be such a baby sometimes. After all their time together, they never found a pet name suitable for one another. They tried going through periods where they'd call each other various terms of endearment such as lamb chop, honey, darling, pet, sweetie, love, etc. None of them stuck because no mater what term they'd temporarily settle on, it never failed to feel contrived. Tina would stick to calling Alex by his name or Anh while he called her Em in return.
Later that night, Tina went inside the bodega. She loved that the place did not change much in the past decade. This gave her a feeling of warmth and comfort. She knew she had gotten there before Alex who was on his way.
Tina looked to see where Estella and Eduardo were. Since she still lived at home, she was not too far from the bodega. After Gaby moved out three years ago (her junior year of college) to sublet a room in a tiny tenement, Tina started checking in on Estella and Eduardo, in a manner she thought was covert. Estella and Eduardo never failed to ask Tina about Gaby and how she was getting along in the dwelling she shared with Mayteana and Melissa, two fellow NYUers she had met, both of whom were Latina and interested in teaching like Gaby. They would then follow-up with asking Tina if she was eating enough. With the Estella and Eduardo Fernandez, it seemed like Tina had four parents.
"Tina!"
Tina turned around and was instantly embraced by Estella.
"Oh..hi, Mrs. Fernández," Tina said while still in Estella's embrace.
"Tina, you know you can call me Estella," Estella said giving Tina look as if to say she just did something naughty.
"Oh did I call you that? I didn't even notice," said Tina embarrassingly, "I've been calling you 'Mrs. Fernández' forever. It's a force of habit."
Estella smiled broadly at Tina. Tina had always admired Estella. She didn't wear too much make-up or fussed up her hair. She is seen in t-shirts and shorts or work pants most of the time, and doesn't seem to make an obvious effort into the way she looks. However, Estella has a winning demeanor and confidence that made you notice her. She was also naturally pretty. Tina wanted to exude some of Estella's qualities, even though Tina liked nice clothes and accessories way too much to truly take after Estella in that respect.
"How's your Mama, Tina?"
"She's really good. My Mom and Dad have been busy with the shop, which is good. They're thinking about moving to a bigger place next year. They want to wait until they have enough saved up and Linda is settled at F.I.T. (Fashion Institute of Technology)."
Estella gave Tina an ambiguous glance and asked "Ah, so where do you think they will move to?"
Tina was a little uncomfortable with Estella's methodological eagerness. She saw there was some ulterior motive behind the questions, but Tina couldn't really figure it out. "Well, they're thinking about renting a brownstone. My mom finally bought some new furniture and our old place isn't really big enough for everything anymore. It's funny. We thought the place would be bigger after Tuan married Thuy and moved out."
"Are they still going to live in Brooklyn?" asked Estella, even more intently.
"Yeah, they want to stay in Fort Greene. They made some great friends here and Tuan and Thuy are nearby, plus their shop is here," asked Tina nervously. She had no idea why Estella's line of questioning was making her nervous. No wonder Alex was good at interrogations.
Estella thought for a moment then asked, "How long have you guys been living there?"
Tina had to think for a moment. When she was born in 1982, her parents were still saving up money from their newly acquired tailor shop for a security deposit for the place Tina would later know as home. Her mom, dad, and Tuan were staying at Tina's aunt's place sister in Queens. They were figuratively and literally fresh off the boat and had only been granted political asylum and entrance into the U.S. three years prior. They were not able to get their own place in Fort Greene until 1984. Tina often thought how difficult it must've been for two people in their twenties, barely speaking the language, lugging around a misbehaving 4 year-old with another one on the way trying to make a new life for themselves. Tina was 23 now and the idea of having to support a family at this age scared her. And yet, the idea also seemed like an exciting challenge.
"About twenty-two years now."
"That's about the same time Eduardo and I got this Bodega." Estella looked around the Bodega and couldn't help but feel a small swelling of pride. Tina noticed it, and felt happy for Estella and Eduardo and even proud that they were able to accomplish so much with what little they initially had.
"Yes, when we first started, Estella and I couldn't walk around without tripping over Alejandro because he wanted to help out so badly."
Eduardo's sudden voice surprised Tina. As she turned to greet Eduardo, the tall Salvadorian man with the graying moustache and slightly curly, similarly graying hair stood tall and straight. He gave a warm smile to Tina that put her at ease. Even though she knew him for a long time and knew that Eduardo liked her, she couldn't shake the image of him as a hot-tempered, intimidating man she knew as a kid. His slower way of speaking English gave Eduardo an unintentionally stern demeanor and contrasted with his rapid-fire delivery of Spanish. Although, this rough demeanor made it sweeter when he would outwardly show his affection towards Gaby and Alex.
"Oh, hi, Mr. Fernández," said Tina in surprise.
"Tina…" responded Eduardo as he gave her the same look Estella gave her.
"Sorry…Eduardo."
"That's better," Eduardo said with a smile which put Tina at ease. His smile differed from Alex's wide, mischievous, self-satisfied smile, but the effects were similar.
"I couldn't help but overhear you and Estella talking," Eduardo said smiling at himself then to Estella, then towards Tina.
"Eduardo, doesn't it sound like her parents are doing well?" asked Estella as she put her arm around her husband.
"Si, it does. Tina, will you be moving with them?" asked Eduardo.
If Tina's initial discomfort had waned with the Fernandez's warmth, it came back full throttle now.
"I guess I would have to," said Tina, unsure who to proceed.
"Well…"
Suddenly the bodega's doors flew open.
"Hey everyone, I'm here!" yelled Alex. "Man, what a day." Alex saw his parents talking to Tina. The picturesque scene almost made Alex giddy. He went straight to Tina and kissed her on the cheek. Tina kissed back although she couldn't help but turn a little red. She had kissed Alex in front of his parents before, and although it had gotten easier, she wasn't quite fully comfortable with doing so yet. PDA in general made Tina uncomfortable when she knew people were watching them specifically. Alex on the other hand had no qualms with making a spectacle out of himself.
All of a sudden the raucous of jamming music blasted from the apartment above. The fusion of the keyboard, saxophone, guitar and other instruments created a nice blend of infectious harmonious energy. The percussion of the drum gave the Bodega a nice, light bass rhythm.
Eduardo couldn't help but laugh. "You know, I used to be very angry when Max and his band would play and interrupt our business. Aye, the music always gave me a headache." Eduardo made a gesture to his forehead.
"Yes, we all remember that, Eduardo," said Estella smiling sweetly.
"Yeah yeah. But now…if I don't hear Max playing, I feel almost…how-do-you-say…empty. Like the Bodega is missing something. And Max and I figured out how to muffle the sound a bit, so it's not so…uh…"
"Disruptive?" offered Tina.
"Sí, correcto."
"I know what you mean," added Tina. "Hearing it makes me sentimental." Tina smiled thinking about all of her time at Lenni's.
"So, what did you guys cook for us?" asked Alex. "I am starving!"
"Aye, we're too tired to cook. Let's just order delivery. How does Chinese sound?" asked Estella.
"Perfect!" all three answered.
The two couples had a great time at dinner full of laughs and great stories. Tina had such a great time with Alex and his parents that she decided to spend the night at the bodega.
A/N: So the story will have chapters that will either narrowly focus on individual characters, character combinations, or the team generally. There will be no particular order. I have given thought to how this story will flow and I will make sure each character will have equal time. I thought I would start with an Alex/Tina-focused chapter to ease you guys in. I also will make sure Alex and Tina will have their separate chapters because I don't want them to be only defined by their relationship to one another. The next chapter will focus on Lenni.
Thanks!
