Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter series or its characters.
Fred's POV
"Nimwit."
"Old-fogey."
"That's two words!"
"It's hyphenated, therefore making it one!"
"George it is one word."
"Ugh fine. Pathetic."
"Quimby."
"Rapscallion."
"That's what you and Fred are!" Hermione cackles.
George and Luna have taken to occupying the couch with Hermione in the arm chair, her legs dangling over the arm. Luna's tucked into George's side, a bowl of grapes resting on her lap. She tosses one into the air for George to catch with his mouth, giggling every time he succeeds. He grins like a fool in love every time she laughs.
"Hello Fred. How was your date with Angelina?" Luna's dreamy eyes still make me edgy.
"She told me Oliver finally asked her to go steady with him." I shrug, flopping into a chair beside the lovebirds. "About bloody time too." I ignore the narrowing of Hermione's eyes. She remains silent as she drinks her tea.
"That's nice."
"You alright with that mate?"
Not really, thanks for asking George.
"Yeah. Any food leftover? I'm starved."
"Should still be some Chinese food left."
"Super."
" 'Mione you're up."
"Stupid."
"Tubby."
"Useless."
I smirk as I wander into the kitchen, propping open the fridge. George and Hermione bonded over coming up with alphabetical insults on a regular basis. I sigh when Angelina's face popped into my head. She and I had been spending more time together; making sure everyone knew when and where we were for dates. Oliver had been dragging his feet too slowly for Angelina's patience so she recruited me to get our friend to snap out of it and commit to her. We've been doing this for the past month and I was getting used to Angelina always being around…
I turn around to find Hermione standing behind me, her hands planted firmly on her hips. Her prefect stance I like to call it.
She raises an eyebrow at me.
I stare back. I never heard her come up behind me. At her 5"9 stature she still has to tilt her head up a bit in order to see my face, me being 6"3 and all.
"Something I can help you with Mia?"
She purses her lips before she mutters a spell under her breath, her body floating in the air so she was now eye level with me. Amber eyes stare into my own eyes. I don't dare blink, even as I feel like she's studying my soul.
Hermione raises a hand and lightly chuffs my chin, her thumb brushing just under my lower lip. "She's a fool Fred." She returns to the ground, giving a crooked smile before grabbing some butter beers from the fridge.
"Hey George! Zarba!"
"That's Arabic!"
"Still counts!"
"What does that mean Hermione?"
"Luna dear, I am calling your boyfriend a piece of shit."
"Oh my."
I remain rooted in the kitchen for a minute before shaking my head, placing a heating charm on my plate of food.
Hermione hides a yawn behind her hand from her position on the floor. She and Luna had been playing a couple rounds of chess. So far they have been evenly matched. "Good game Luna. I'm going to have to call it a night. I've got the morning shift as St. Mungos tomorrow."
"That's what you get for being the newbie."
"6 months is still a newbie?"
"I'm ready to turn in myself." Luna rises to her feet. She stands less than 5"4, making George appear a giant behind her. He quickly bends down and scoops her in his arms.
"M'lady, allow me to escort you to your flat."
"Thank you good sir. Good night Hermione. Fred."
"Good night Luna."
"Sweet dreams honey. Make sure you check George's stitches before you turn in."
George turns to me. "I'll join you in the morning this time."
I roll my eyes. "That's what you said last night."
Hermione and I share a knowing look as the two disappeared into the floo.
"I give it 6 months before he just moves in with her."
"I can't even imagine not sharing a room with him anymore." I extend my hands to pull Hermione off the floor.
She hops up, squeezing both of my hands in hers. "You'll still have me as a roomie."
I wrap an arm around her shoulders, grinning. "Until a bloke sweeps you off your feet and outta this place."
Hermione snorts, swatting my chest. "Like that'll happen anytime soon. I've got twin pranksters for roommates and then the infamous Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley as best friends. That's enough to scare off any sane wizard to immediately friend zone me."
She leads me to our bathroom. Without being told I shrug out of my shirt. Sitting on the counter, Hermione carefully removes the gauze off my shoulder. "How's it feeling today?"
I flinch at the cold ointment she applies with her finger tips. "It's itchy. Feels like one huge scab that I just want to rip off." Hermione efficiently replaces the gauze and bandages over my stitches.
"It's almost healed. The itching feeling is a good thing."
I turn around, smirking as I press my hands against the counter, efficiently caging her between my arms. I flex the muscles in my arms and grin when a light blush colours her cheeks. No girl is immune to my charms.
"Hello Hermione."
"Hello Fred."
"The offer to kick Christopher's ass still stands."
"I can bitch-slap Angelina if you like."
I laugh, placing my hands on her waist to lift her off the counter. "Not necessary. She and Oliver are meant to be together. Everyone knows that. Oliver just needed some fire under his ass."
Hermione frowns for a moment. "I don't understand why he'd be threatened by you."
I raise an eyebrow in challenge. "That so? I am every girl's dream Miss. Granger. I have my own business-"
"That you share with George."
"I am funny, smart, charming, suave, not to mention." I run a hand down my stomach "my delightful 6 pack of sexiness. And then my skills between the sheets." I grin cheekily, winking.
To Hermione's credit she didn't blush when her eyes rest on my abs. To my surprise she steps forward and runs a finger tip down one side of my abs before another. She looks up at me, before crooking a finger for me to bend over. I oblige.
Her lips barely brush my ear. "Your 6 pack beginning to turn into a 4 pack." I snap to attention at that, looking at her incredulously before looking down at my stomach.
4 pack my ass!
Hermione's face remained expressionless and if I hadn't caught the twinkle in her eyes as she left the bathroom I would've believed her to be serious.
I pull my wand out of my pocket and sent an invisible hand charm after her.
I laugh at her yelp as the hand effectively slaps her ass. I grin at my reflection.
I almost choke on my toothpaste when an invisible hand swats me upside the head.
Hermione's POV
"Please Hermione; it would be so much fun! And they'd never expect it!"
I huff down at my clipboard. It's so typical of Luna to be harassing me at work. Especially about this. I was really hoping she had forgotten about her crazy scheme for the twins.
"Luna I don't know if that's such a good idea. Won't that make it weird between me and the guys?"
"It's not like you've never seen a naked man before. You working at St. Mungos and all."
I sigh as I set papers down at the reception desk. "Please make sure Healer Tang gets this. Thank you." The receptionist nods to me. I turn back to Luna.
"And you want to do this for both of them?"
"Yes. I wouldn't want Fred to feel left out. It is their birthday after all."
I press my lips together. This could be either a really good idea or the worst idea in the world. Come on Hermione, you weren't in Gryffindor for nothing. You survived a war. You can survive this.
"Fine Luna. Nobody is to know about this. Fred and George will need to take an oath."
"I'll see to it they do so before we begin." Luna hugs be enthusiastically, flashing me a dreamy smile before apparating out of the hospital.
I shake my head at her. This is going-
"Healer Granger! You're needed now!"
I pivot on the spot and rush to the end of the hall. Sparks were sizzling out of a teenager, like he had stuck his finger in a plug for too long. This'll be interesting.
I dismiss Luna from my mind.
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