Malan MacHeath, lord of some pack, growled and growled. He had been all set to eat McDonald's, but when he had opened the box, there were cherry tomatoes instead of nuggets! Anger bubbled inside him until he was about ready to throw his pup across the den. Of course, he'd done that before, but you get it.

Today he was meeting with the other lords. When he got there he realized that the only ones there were the ones in charge of a pack-with a gnaw wolf in it.

"I think Edme and her friends were up to something!" Malan roared.

All the wolves murmured agreement. "What do we do?"

"Those gnaw wolves will pay for those gumballs that gave me indigestion!"


The plan was simple. Knowing Faolan ate everything, Bhreac did not hesitate. The huge silver wolf was unable to stomach one thing: pineapples. "What? No, it's-it's cantaloupe!"

Cantaloupe my tail, Faolan thought, but didn't risk a beating. Later he explained to the Whistler, "I knew what he was doing. I thought I would warn you."

"Things just got real," the Whistler muttered.

From that day forward, every prank was matched, and armies grew. Sort of. Even the Watch got involved, much to Finbar's dismay. Surprisingly the Obeas were on the gnaw wolves' side. Maybe they were drugged.


The final battle came when Creakle and Lael went to Domino's to get pizza. A friendly young wolf with a chin strap beard and sunglasses made pizza for them and offered them some pink cookies from Hawaii. It seemed shady to Lael. She didn't expect the wolf to know about the prank war, but she couldn't swallow her suspicions.

Creakle, however, trusted the wolf completely. He took a bite from the cookie. "Eww!" he squealed. "It tastes like tree bark and food coloring!"

"Ha!" The wolf ripped off the beard and sunglasses to reveal a long scar. It was Dunbar MacHeath! "We win!"

"Who decided that?"

"Um..."


Everyone met, grumbling, to decide on the rules. If anyone "broke," the other team won.

It seemed fair.


One night when Faolan (warily) asked Edme out and they (warily) went to the movies, Duncan MacDuncan and Angus MacAngus observed them carefully. "They're going to see Minions," Angus whispered.

"Okay."

"They're going to get a snack."

"Okay."

"Come on, Duncan. Time to make our move."

"Okay."

Angus crept behind the bar, sticking on a pencil mustache as he went. "What can I get you today?" he asked.

Faolan ordered actual pink cookies and poked them to make sure they weren't bark. Edme asked for Skittles. Angus gave her M&Ms. She said, "Skittles. Those are not Skittles."

"How can you tell?" Angus wailed.

"It says on the label, bro."

Angus sighed. "That's ten bucks." Faolan gave him toy money he stole from Caila's pups. Angus didn't realize until the wolves had already gone into the theater. He banged his head on the wall until he passed out.


"And that," Kali finished, "is how the gnaw wolves won the prank war."

"That was the best story ever," said Cana.


Twist with Kali and Cana, huh?