I spend the night tossing and turning, thinking about what I overheard between Stef and Lena. I'm a lot like Callie? I can't see her as a girl who went to juvie. Just from what I've seen of her so far, her personality throws off the idea of her going to juvie. To me, she's too kind, too gentle.
Too innocent.
Callie doesn't seem to be like a girl who gets in trouble here, much less than with the cops. It suddenly makes me want to know more about her.
I get it's towards Jude or somebody she knows, when she seems to let them reason with her, but towards me? Callie has been kind, more than I expect. But if she knows my past, that would change, right? It always does. My foster parents read my file? Out the door we go.
I think about her motions near me. They certainly weren't as comfortable as they could have been. She seemed to be constantly worried about me, as if I was going to hurt myself or she was going to hurt me.
Callie locked behind bars?
The idea makes me want to puke, I get it that people change. But it's not a big change. Actually, it is not at a change at all. People act differently around other people. I bet you that Mariana or whatever her name is acts different around her friends than she would here. We all do that. It doesn't really mean we change, I think it just means that we're able to know what's right and what's wrong around certain people.
Which leads to Lena's wonderful question of the day. "Why would we want to make him to feel like the world is against him?"
Yeah, I do feel like that sometimes. No, not some times, most of the time. I've gotten so used to it, I usually don't react to it when something happens to make me feel that way. I think that's one of the worst ways to live, to not have any emotion towards something because you're so used to it. It makes me feel like I'm a heartless person, but I do care about people and things. Not a lot, but I still do. That counts right? Maybe I don't care about a lot of people, but I still have a heart, right?
I close my eyes, telling myself that I should go to bed, get some sleep before Stef or Lena wake me up for school. I need the sleep anyways. Sleeping on those beds weren't very comfortable. And for now, I know this is a safe house, so I won't have to worry about that. Getting hurt here is probably the least thing I have to worry about.
After a few minutes of not being able to fall asleep, I know that I won't be able to fall asleep tonight, but I have nothing to do to past time. Maybe I should have taken Stef's offer for me to take a shower. It's not to late to do that, even if they are asleep.
Or I could go to Callie.
I shake that thought out of my head. Why would I go to Callie? It's not like I need her. Callie wouldn't even let me in her room this late anyways, I know that for a fact. And I'm pretty sure she has a boyfriend.
I settle for getting myself a cup of water. All the lights are off, so I'm surprised when I see somebody in the kitchen already, but I decide to ignore them, it's not like they know that I'm here. I'd like to keep it that way.
Then I realize that it is Callie. "You should be in bed." I say, and she jumps, looking at me.
"So should you," Callie grumbles, and I notice that she's gripping the counter hard enough to turn her knuckles white. "Besides, it's my house."
I nod, ignoring the pain that is still in my side. "I didn't mean to scare you," I murmur, and she looks at me if she's surprised. "You okay?"
Callie doesn't answer me, but she nods, running her fingers through her hair. But she's still shaken up, not meeting my eyes.
"You're sure that you're okay?" I ask, and I know I surprised her even more.
"I don't see why you would care."
I lose my patience of trying to be nice. Or caring towards Callie. I'll never be able too. "Sorry for trying to care! Look, Callie you could be thankful that I'm even trying here!"
Callie looks at me in shock, her mouth slightly open, and I know she's trying to think of something to say. "What difference does it make? You're still going to be you."
I am angered by her words, and I clench my jaw to refrain from saying anything to her. A few hours ago, she's easy to get along with and now she's acting like a bitch.
"You know nothing about me," I tell her through gritted teeth, stepping closer to her, and she backs up against the counter, and I rest my hands on the counter at her sides. "Don't talk about me like that, understand?"
Callie doesn't answer as she pushes past me, and I sigh. So much for trying to get along with her. I just had to get mad at her for no reason. I think about trying to apologize to her, but I can't bring myself to do it. But I should apologize to Callie. Because of one simple thing.
She's right.
I'm never going to change. I'm always going to be that foster kid that nobody cares about. I'm always going to be getting in trouble, no matter what I was trying to do. If it was protecting somebody I cared about or if I was actually trying to do something good.
When I wake up, Stef is hovering over me, shaking my shoulder, holding a cup of coffee. "I woke you up early so you can take a shower before everybody wakes up, so hurry up."
I groan, and I notice that she's in her uniform, and I take the clothes that she was offering me. "Thank you." I say, just to be nice.
Stef just nods stiffly before walking into the kitchen, and I run my fingers through my hair, looking at the clothes she gave me. A dark tee shirt with jeans.
I go up stairs and turn on the water, peeling my dirty clothes off of me, and the bruise on my side looks worse than it did before.
I let the hot water run down my back, in hopes that it would help me relax. But the shower doesn't help me relax like I wish it would've. Instead, it makes me feel more alert. Giving up on the chance of being able to relax, I turn off the water quickly and get dressed, knowing that the other kids would be up by now.
When I run into somebody, I expect it to be Mariana or Jude, but it's Callie. I curse myself for not putting on my shirt. "Watch where you're going."
Callie doesn't respond to me, or at how harsh I am towards her, instead she's staring at me. "S-sorry." She stutters, finally looking away, going down the stairs.
I put on my shirt before I start down the stairs, and I can hear the twins bickering, and I know that it's nothing unusual.
I'm surprised by how much food there is on the table, there's never this much food where I've been. Much less real food. I sit down next to Jesus, who still eyes me.
"Bacon?" He asks, shoving another piece into his mouth, handing me plate. "We have pancakes too."
I take the plate from him quietly, and he smiles as I take one, and look at him.
"They aren't poison if that's what you're asking me. Just eat them, they're really good. Mom cooked them."
I shrug and take a bite.
"You guys are going to have to walk to school today," Lena says. "I need to drop off mama at the station. So hurry up. you guys need to be out the door in five- oh, and Callie? Can you show Brandon these are his classes."
"But I was going to hang out with Wyatt this morning."
"You see him everyday, Callie. I'm pretty sure that he'll be fine with you missing some time with him. Just show Brandon around, that's all I need of you Callie."
Callie nods, grumbling something and I mentally groan. Just more time to be stuck with her when I could be finding out where Sarah is.
"You guys are already late, go. I'll clean up later, hurry up!"
Everybody starts groaning, and Lena shoves a notebook into my hands. "This is until we get you a backpack, okay?"
I don't answer her, instead I just leave the table, waiting for Callie to come. She looks at me. "You better not get into a fight." Is all she says before walking out the door.
At first, I just stand there, surprised by her words. What does she think I do? Pick fights for no reason? If anything, I'm always the one they choose to fight. I'll admit that sometimes I push them too far, but I don't go around picking them for no reason.
She's already at the end of the street when I go after her. "What the hell is your problem?"
"My problem?" Callie demands, turning around to face me. "What's your problem? One minute you're so easy to talk to then the next you're acting like a complete asshole!"
She starts to turn around, but I grab her wrist, forcing her to look at me.
"You're the one who's acting like you know everything about me! Do you really think that I pick fights for no reason?" I say through gritted teeth, and I see the fear in her eyes but I don't let it affect me.
"Seems like it," She mutters, looking away from me. "You're hurting me, Brandon."
I let go of her wrist. I probably grabbed it to hard, and she starts walking away again, and I don't stop her, instead I follow her. I can hear the twins bickering again close behind me, and I run my fingers through my hair.
Besides Callie, it wouldn't be to bad here. I could deal with the twins, Sarah would get along with them well. And Jude doesn't really do anything. He's just quiet.
The walk to the school is shorter than I expected, and I'm surprised when I see that it's on the beach. "You go to school here?"
"Get used to it, bro!" Jesus says, patting my back before riding away on his skateboard.
"You be surprised that we actually do more learning than spending time outside," Mariana tells me, shrugging. "Unless you're like Jesus."
The only thing I can think about is how much my dad would have wanted me to go here. He'd love it. Callie shoves a piece of paper into my hands hastily.
"You have all of the same classes as me, and a free period. I'll see you later."
I expected her to say something worse before leaving me, and I stare at the piece of paper in my hands. Free period is at the end of the day.
School is supposed to start in ten minutes according to the schedule, and I figured to make use of my time that I would waste it trying to find the class rooms.
Sadly when I do find the classroom, Callie saw it as a good time to makeout with her boyfriend against the door.
I clear my throat, and they jump apart, a blush immediately on Callie cheeks. "Good to see you, Callie." I say, and her boyfriend looks at me.
"Who the hell are you?"
"Brandon." I answer simply, and I can tell my answer angers him.
"Wyatt, relax," Callie says, her hand resting on his chest when she notices his anger. "He's just staying with us for a few weeks."
"Maybe forever."
Callie looks at me, and I regret saying that, I don't know what overcame me. I know that I would never get adopted by Stef and Lena.
"I doubt that will ever happen," Wyatt says. "A kid like you?"
"Says the hair model." I blurt, not really caring about what he would do to me.
"Maybe I should put another bruise on your face, how 'bout that?"
Callie steps between us this time, and I'm not going to lie, I'm thankful that she does. "Wyatt, leave him alone. He's not going to do anything."
Wyatt stares at me, and I know if it weren't for Callie being here, he would have no problem with fighting me. He knows that he has an advantage.
The bell rings, and Wyatt nods. "I'll see you next period."
I groan, and he looks at me before walking away.
"Do you have to ruin everything?" Callie demands, looking at me.
"Well it's not my fault that you guys were almost having sex in the middle of the hallway." I tell her, leaning against the wall as a bunch of kids come piling into the hallways around us.
Callie's mouth hangs open in shock. "I- I... We weren't... we weren't gonna have-"
"Trust me, it was going in that direction. You're welcome." I say, opening the door behind me, into the halfway filled classroom.
The teacher Timothy smiles at me. "You must be Brandon?"
I nod, surprised that he didn't stare at me before he said anything.
"Alright, we'll just wait until everybody is here, then we'll see where you can sit. You came in a good time, we're starting a new project today."
In a few minutes the bell rings again, and Timothy starts to take attendance. I don't bother to listen. It's not like I need to know anybody here.
"Brandon why don't you go sit down next to Tayla." I look at Timothy blankly, and he just nods his head towards her, a girl sitting behind Callie.
Tayla gives me a smile as I sit down, and I ignore it, crossing my arms over my chest. Timothy spends the entire class period explaining what we're doing. Reading some classic book and a presentation over it or something like that.
Tayla tries talking to me after class. "Hey, it's Brandon, right?"
"Yeah, why?" I ask, not bothering to look at her.
"I'm just making sure, when do you think we can get started on the project."
"I- uh, I don't know. I just got moved into a new foster house. I'll have to ask my foster moms."
Tayla nods. "Well, just let me know when you find out, okay?" She doesn't give me a chance to answer before she goes the opposite way.
It's finally free period, and I'm debating myself if I should go get Sarah myself or tell Stef, she's a cop. But then I would have to explain who she is and a bunch of other bullshit. I throw out the notebook Lena gave me, it has no use to me now.
I make it off of school campus when I hear Callie calling me. "Brandon! Where are you going?"
"Somewhere." I answer, not even slowing down to look at her.
"Off school campus? What is so important for you to leave school early?"
"My sister. Now why don't you go back to your hair model of a boyfriend?"
"I'm just trying to help!"
My hands ball up into fists. Callie would never help me. Never in a million years. "Are you sure about that? Because earlier you were blaming me for everything that went wrong in your life! It's not like you understand!"
"What don't I understand? That you just wanna get your sister back? I do understand, Brandon! The same thing happened to Jude and I. At least let me help you!"
I turn around to face her, and I know she's telling the truth. I want to turn around and leave her standing there, but I could use some help, right? If I get Sarah alone and things go wrong, I would probably end up in juvie again. Dumb ass probation. If Callie comes with me, I wouldn't have to worry. Sure I might get in trouble with Stef and Lena, but that's it.
My jaw tightens, and I nod, trying to contain my anger. "Fine."
