Shadus: Ah! I haven't updated on this! Sorry! Well, I'll continue now!

Ashfur: The author does not own Warriors.

Yukkureimu: Yu!

Ashfur: Nor this severed head called Yukkuri. *looks at it* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Shadus: *smacks Ashfur with a bat* that's the disclaimer, now to the show.

Yukkuri: Watch it easy!

Helicopter approaches the crater formed by an explosion.

Human Tigerstar: I guess they got blasted to different places?

Human Squirrelflight: That's great! Their next challenge would be able to be started then!

Human Scourge: Preparations completed, I'll announce it to them after... After we find the first team that has all competitors alive.

The helicopter flies off to the west side of the island.

{Scenery Change}

Mistystar: My beautiful fur. Burned because of some IDIOTS!

Ashfur: So what do we do now that we are here in the island?

Berrynose: I think we should talk to our team.

Blackstar: ...

Mistystar: Your team sucks! Haha!

Blackstar: Yours too!

Mistystar: Not as much as yours!

Blackstar: At least my team is not full of psychos and most of them are just quite stupid.

Ashfur, Berrynose, Crowfeather and Breezepelt: Heeey!

Mistystar: Ha! My team doesn't even have a psycho.

Graystripe: Zombie!

Hawkfrost: Again for the ten millionth time, and I have been counting, I AM NOT A FREAKING ZOMBIE!

Graystripe: So you're alive?

Hawkfrost: Yes!

Graystripe: Icecloud, Hawkfrost is alive!

Icecloud: SLEEP WITH ME AND HAVE KITS!

Hawkfrost: What?

Icecloud: *glomps Hawkfrost* LOVED!

Hawkfrost: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *runs off*

Icecloud: *gives chase* good idea! You find where we can sleep!

Mothwing: WAAAH! I KNEW IS HOULD HAVE BEEN VERY CAUTIOUS FROM THE VERY START! WAAAH! *continues crying*

Graystripe: Reminds me of fond memories.

Mistyfoot: See!

Blackstar: ...

Ashfur: Mistyfoot...

Crowfeather: We value your wise *cough* idiot *cough* choices.

Berrynose: -And we don't want to hurt your feelings by laughing at your face.

Breezepelt: Nor insult you directly.

Blackstar: So please excuse us for a moment.

Third Team: *heads to bushes* cough, cough, cough... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SHE WAS SO STUPID! SHE'S CRAZIER THAN ROSETAIL!

Rosetail from afar: *wakes up from sleeping* hmm?

Mistyfoot: Eye'm the strongest.

Berrynose: I don't think there's anyone stupider than her!

Dustpelt: DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERP! *licks beetle*

Berrynose: Except for Dustpelt.

Ashfur: It's annoying how we have to be twolegs in order to win the prize. I mean, what kind of animals can we catch with these weak clawless paws? *pokes Berrynose on the eye*

Berrynose: OWW!

Ashfur: Oh, sorry. *steps on Crowfeather's foot*

Crowfeather: OW! *accidentally/purposely swings arm at Breezepelt*

Breezepelt: OW! *leans back and trips on Blackstar*

A helicopter hovers close to them.

Tigerstar speaks on a megaphone: Attention all living survivors, the first challenge will start today. May I all wish you have a bad luck on doing the challenge.

Squirrelflight: *kicks Tigerstar*

Tigerstar: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *falls to a pond* good thing this is water and I know how to swim.

A shark fin appears and circles him.

Tigerstar: ... Is this part of the show? *grabs a rope ladder above him* adios *gets lifted away*

Squirrelflight using Tigerstar's megaphone: The challenge for today is to find your proper homes on the sides of the island. Obstacles and traps are around so beware of them and snacks would be provided at the end once you find your easy places/ home. Go take it easy!

Yukkuri: Take it easy!

Squrrelflight: *takes a bite out of it* yum, chocolate.

Yukkuri: YUUUUUU!

The cries of the Yukkuri being massacred slowly faded as the helicopter left the contestants.

Berrynose: Is that a severed head beside Squirrelflight? The thing she just ate?

Graystripe pops out of nowhere and asked "Squirrelflight ate a severed head?"

Berrynose, Crowfeather, and Ashfur: AAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Graystripe: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Crowfeather: Dude you scared us.

Graystripe: Well, I am the strongest!

Hawkfrost: Mistystar, can I please kill this crazy cat.

Mistystar: No.

Blackstar: Come on team, let's search for the dens. The sooner we finish this the better.

Crowfeather: What's in it for us?

Ashfur: You get to be safe from that thing. *points at werewolf*

Werewolf: Sup?

Ashfur: Sup... See.

Crowfeather: Good eno-

Breezepelt: OBJECTION! Not good enough!

Berrynose: We get snacks once we find that place.

Breezepelt: Are there cookies?

Blackstar: There might be.

Breezepelt: That is not an option. The deal is-

Ashfur: Hold it! What if I make cookies from the food from the house.

Breezepelt: You sir have a deal. *shakes hands with Ashfur*

Ashfur: I got it completely covered instantly... WHAT THE HECK IS THIS! *points at hand with slime*

Breezepelt: Oh, I kinda picked my nose and sneezed on-

Ashfur: *punches Breezepelt*

Mistystar: PUNCH!

The five cats stared at her.

Mistystar: ... *shrugs* I felt the need to do it*

Blackstar: Let's go.

Team Last leaves and heads off to the north of the island.

Graystripe: ZOMBIE!

Hawkfrost: I swear to Starclan that I –

Mistystar: You're not even a god guy!

Hawkfrost: Good point. I swear to Dark Forest that I will-... Mistystar...

Mistystar: ...Yesh? ...

Hawkfrost: Where did you heard that from?

Mistystar: From my mother.

Bluestar from the heavens: Powned ya! Starclan 1, Dark Forest 0.

Random Korean Warhead explodes at the sky.

Bluestar: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Starclan cat: MY LEG!

Hawkfrost: ... I swear to Dark Forest that I, will kill you Graystripe-

Graystripe: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- *runs off*

Hawkfrost: -after the contest.

Icecloud: Hey guys, look at what I found. *shows bear trap*

Graystripe: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *trips on Icecloud*

Slow motion time

Icecloud: Noo...

Graystripe: Dear Starclan...

Mistystar: GRAYSTRIPE!

Hawkfrost: YEEEEEES!

Werewolf: *drinks coke* ... Sup?

Willowshine: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey, guuuuuuuuuuuys. What-

Normal Motion time

Icecloud: SHADOW CLONE JUTSU! *does hand signals*

Graystripe: *falls on bear trap* ... GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

Somewhere...

? – AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

Tigerheart: ... Dear Starclan, what was that?

Hollyleaf: I have completed a tracker! FOR SCIENCE! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!

Tawnypelt and Sandstorm: ... 0_0

Leafstar: You just read this sign right? We have to find a den. It's part of the challenge and we have to win it. After all, were the team with the best members. It would be shameful if we lost to some other teams right?

Sandstorm: This is a den right? *points at well*

Tigerheart: I don't think-

Hollyleaf: Allow me to investigate. *inspects well* hmm, just to make sure *drops bomb on well* BOMBS AWAY!

SFX –BOO-Cricket Chirping

Hollyleaf: That's strange. It usually-

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Hollyleaf was now doused in water: ... I stand corrected.

Random voice: Congratulations, you have know found your secret home. Inside are some snacks and a special item.

Leafstar: ... I believe we have the power of luck.

Tigerheart: I'm off inside! *jumps inside well* here, we GOOOOOOOOOO!

Hollyleaf: For science! *jumps inside*

Tigerheart: Ouch. That didn't feel good. Hollyleaf, get off of me.

Hollyleaf: The den is here, the snacks are here too and some strange box.

Leafstar: Let's go inside the den then!

Somewhere...

Moonflower: This didn't go well. Where are Dustpelt and Rosetail?

Lionblaze: Don't worry, the herbs will aid us on finding them.

Ferncloud: Knowing what happened to Dustpelt, I won't be surprised if an entire army of twolegs are angry and hunting us down on moonhigh.

Moonflower: Look, you heard the challenge. Let's go find a home.

Ferncloud: Lionblaze, go enter that tree hole.

Lionblaze: K. *enters tree trunk* hey, there's a shiny-

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

"It's like flying in the sky!" Lionblaze exclaimed as he crashed to the forest.

Ferncloud: That takes out the crazy ones. Let's go find a home now.

Moonflower: Is that so?

Somewhere...

Blackstar sits on a rock as he patiently waits for his teammates to arrive. Berrynose suddenly arrived.

Berrynose: Commander Blackstar! From the book and not the anime! We have located two homes and secured one of them. The other one however had severed twoleg heads on them so we decided against going there.

Said den...

Breezepelt: That thing must have been deadly if it can kill twolegs. See that!

Crowfeather: Well, hopefully we get to the other safe den where we can take it easy...

Breezepelt: ...

Yukkuri: ... Yu... Yu... *sleeping*

Crowfeather: It's slightly creeping me out...

Yukkuri: Yu? Take it easy!

Crowfeather and Breezepelt: - *shoutings faded off as they ran off*

Yukkuri: Yu? Reimu must be powerful because mister humans were scared by Reimu. Puff Puff.

Back to Blackstar...

Blackstar: Reminds me of the time Tawnypelt found Bumblestripe on out territory. *gazes to the sky*

Berrynose: INCOMING FLASHBACK! *ducks*

Flashback –

Bumblestripe: *sleeps* Mom... I didn't eat the cookies... Briarlight's imaginary friend ate it... I don't care if it's poisoned... I didn't eat it... I love you too Tawnypelt...

Tawnypelt: *reveals herself from a bush* Wake up Thunderclan cat!

Bumblestripe: TAWNYPELT GOT COOTIES! ... Huh?

Tawnypelt: Well guess who broke into the border and is in Shadowclan territory.

Bumblestripe: I accept your challenge. 242!

Tawnypelt: No...

Bumblestripe: Aww...

Rowanclaw: Incoming megatroid!

Flashback interrupting

Berrynose: BLACKSTAR! SNAP OUT OF YOUR FLASHBACK!

Blackstar: Huh? Oh thanks. Anyway then, let's go there already. Scout Berrynose, head to private Breezepelt and Sergeant Crowfeather and get them to go to Sergeant Ashfur and the den he found.

Berrynose: ... So I have to get Breezepelt and Crowfeather to where Ashfur is?

Blackstar: Yeah pretty much. I just want to act like that okay.

Berrynose: ...Too much video games... *runs off*

Blackstar: *spins a stick around and performs Light Yagami Face* Just as planned. *normal face* these hands are pretty handy too. *walks off*

Helicopter...

Squirrelflight: It seems that Leafstar and Blackstar's team has found their dens.

Tigerstar: May we hope more bad things will happen, like Graystripe's foot on his bear trap.

?: And let's all hope this ends soon. Leafpool won't be happy with me gone for long.

Tigerstar: I bet she's happier now that you're here.

Leafpool's den...

Leafpool in a middle of crowd of cats drining: PARTYING PARTYING PARTYING!

Cats: HEY!

Random cat: Hey guess what I've found!

Bumblestripe: 242!

Random cat: No...

Bumblestripe: Drat.

Random cat: It's Firestar's diary!

Bumblestripe: So close.

Other cats: YAY!

Leafpool: I don't think you should read i-

Random cat: Let's see. *opens diary* this seems like... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *runs away*

All: ...

Leafpool: You have been warned.

Helicopter...

Squirrelflight: Shouldn't we watch them.

Tigerstar: Onwards to watch the sufferings!

Team of Dustpelt...

Moonflower: We're lost aren't we?

Ferncloud: Afraid so. Don't worry, there are no monsters around.

Werewolf: Sup?

Ferncloud: ...

Moonflower: ... A-

Ferncloud: Don't even think about saying it.

Lionblaze: *comes out of nowhere* I found Dustpelt and old lady Rosetail! *gets hit by a rock and Dustpelt and Rosetail comes out of a bush*

Dustpelt: MYAMA!

Rosetail: Since this is so annoying, I decided to search for the den. I found it but I slept on it before warning you.

Ferncloud: ...

Moonflower: I guess it's settled! We won!

Lionblaze: WOOOOHOOOO! THANK YOU TO THE POWER OF HERBS!

Team of Mistystar...

Mistystar: Come on Graystripe, stop being a baby.

Graystripe: My left leg is on a bear trap! Who wouldn't scream?

Willowshine: Hey look, Graystripe is sane again!

Hawkfrost: Really? I think he's still an idiot.

Graystripe: CAN YOU PLEASE GET IT OFF OF ME!

Icecloud: I'm sorry!

Hawkfrost: Hey Icecloud, want a way to say sorry to Graystripe?

Icecloud: I just did.

Hawkfrost: You can instead- *whisper whisper*

Icecloud: What?

Hawkfrost: Just Mate with him!

Icecloud: Okay! *drags Graystripe away*

Graystripe: HELP! HELP ME!

Icecloud: *moves stick*

A boulder rolls and an entrance to a cave appears.

Mistystar: There's our den!

Willowshine: Hooray!

6:41 pm

Tigerstar: Well teams, you're all here since you passed... You're all here because some of you ate all the food and you found the note on one of the bowls.

Ashfur and Crowfeather: *glares at Berrynose and Breezepelt*

Tigerstar: Anyway, the first two teams that found the dens are Blackstar and Leafstar's teams.

Leafstar: Hooray!

Blackstar: *just as planned face*

SFX – Cheers from both teams.

Tigerstar: You could all leave now, members of Team Star and Team Last.

As the teams leaves...

Berrynose: We defeated you! We are winners! WE are-

Tigerstar: Leafstar don't forget your broken radio as prize for first place. On the next challenge, it might help you...

Leafstar: Thanks!

Berrynose: ...

Ashfur: Sad times bro, sad times...

Tigerstar: This leaves us to Riverwalker Team and Team TIGERSTAR IS AWESOME! Anyway, since both of you found your dens at the same time, you have to fight in a tiebreaker.

Hawkfrost: I'll do it.

Tigerstar: The tiebreaker is a wrestling match!

Hawkfrost: Do I get to snap the enemy's body?

Tigerstar: Yup.

Hawkfrost: I'm in. *breaks a piece of stone in half*

Mistystar: ... We're going to win.

Rosetail: I'll fight him. Surely this wrestling is going to be easy.

Hawkfrost: Pinning Rosetail easy *pins down Rosetail*

Tigerstar: 1...2...2.9...2.99...

Rosetail: OF COURSE I'D LOVE TO MATE WITH YOU SONNY!

Hawkfrost: Wait wha-

-Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep-

The following scene has been removed for your own safety...

-Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep-

Hawkfrost: *cowers at corner*

Rosetail: Ah that felt good. *sleeps*

Tigerstar: ... Hawkfrost wins... Team Tigerstar is awesome, please meet me in the elimination booth.

Elimination booth...

Mysterious figure in cloak: You are all here for the Battle Royale. All of you-

Moonflower: Wait, I thought we were on Warriors Survivors?

Figure: Oops, sorry. I thought the cast for Battle Royale was here. Anyway, you are all here to vote off someone... Here's how you do it. You make a voodoo doll and you write the one you wanted to vote off there... You will then show the names to me.

All: K.

Few minutes later

Figure: Here are the names.

Moonflower – Doll has Rosetail

Ferncloud – Doll has Rosetail

Dustpelt – Lionblaze – HE STOLE MY COOKIE!

Lionblaze – Rosetail – She's lazy and barely usable

Rosetail – Rosetail – I'm lazy and barely usable... I don't even care about this...

Figure: ... Too bad Tigerstar said you have an immunity for this challenge since your team name says he is awesome. All of you are safe...

Rosetail: NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Others: Sigh/Phew.

Figure: For now...

Rosetail: YEEEES!

Meteor randomly falls down.

Tenshi: ... Umm... Oops, sorry?

Figure: Guess who's getting beaten up.

Bumblestripe: 242!

All: O_O

Shadus: Well, that's all for now. Sorry if you wanted someone to lose. Anyway, if you can recognize, here are some references are:

Touhou Project – Yukkuri and Tenshi

I'm in the Band – 'We're not going to laugh at your face' joke

Death Note – Light Yagami 'Just as planned!'

Battle Royale - Film

Shadus: I'll try to update ASAP. Just review to motivate me and hopefully things go smoothly.