Howdy! Here's chapter three! Enjoy!


Chapter Three

My hand was throbbing. I looked down at the red mark on my palm from where I struck the door to Spencer's room. I don't think I broke it but I could have if I had tried harder.

I had been rejected by Spencer twice tonight. Once, at the school right after the shooting. Again, here in her room after she finally let everything sink in.

I wanted to explain to her how I felt. That the first person I thought of when all hell broke loose was her and only her. Not Aiden, not Kyla, not myself even; just her. She wouldn't even let me explain.

She hated me for my failure to make a decision. She hated me for all the shit I had put her through especially these last few weeks. I never caught on to how much everything I did or did not do was taking a toll on her and our relationship.

And Aiden? I should have seen that he wasn't with Kyla because he liked her. He was with her because she was close to me. I guess in his own sick way being with Kyla was like being with me only when he looked into her eyes as he kissed her it wasn't my eyes that were looking back at him.

The night was a disaster and all I could do was think of Spencer. I loved her there was no doubt about that and the realization that I could have lost her scared me. Thoughts of my accusations of betrayal towards Spencer still rang in my head. She wasn't trying to hurt me she was trying to protect us.

Why couldn't I have seen all of this earlier? Why did a near-death experience have to shake me into realizing my feelings?

I lowered my head in my hands as I slumped down in the hospital chair right outside of Spencer's door. I hadn't moved since I left her in there alone. I should have gone back in but when I saw Glen walk past I decided to let them have a moment for their brother.

My heart nearly broke when I heard Glen yell loudly from inside the room. I stood up quickly afraid that something had happened to Spencer and peered through the window to find Glen pounding the side of the bed over and over.

Spencer's eyes were full of tears as she reached out for her brother. I couldn't hear what they were saying but Glen calmed and reached for her hand. She was careful with his hand and was continuing to try to calm him. He stood and clenched his fists and Spencer's eyes again were full of sadness as she spoke to him.

Whatever she had said made Glen unclench his fists and lean over to hug his sister tightly. I couldn't watch anymore and I returned to my seat. I knew how hard it was to lose someone you loved.

Clay was innocent in all of this. He was doing the right thing with Chelsea taking responsibility for their child and protecting her from the harshness of the world. He was the best brother a person could ever hope for and he was the most caring and trustworthy friend. He was…oh god…he was…he was gone.

"Ashley?" I heard a soft voice say my name. I turned my head to find Kyla standing there with a look of concern.

"Hey Ky." I said softly in response.

"How's Spencer?" She said taking a seat in the chair next to me.

"She's going to be ok. I got one of the nurses to tell me what was wrong and she said that a bullet grazed her back but luckily missed everything. She is going to be ok…" I said with a bittersweet tone.

"Why don't you sound too happy about that?" She asked looking at me with a confused look.

"I am happy that she's going to be ok…."

"But?"

"But I don't know if WE are going to be ok…I really screwed up tonight Kyla." I said shaking my head.

"Ashley the shooting was not your fault…we were all so lucky to not be hurt also…I mean Aiden could have been killed when he shielded you…"

I laughed when I heard Aiden's name. I don't know why I did it but Kyla looked at me surprised.

"Why are you laughing Ashley? Aiden saved your life."

"Did he Kyla? You didn't hear all the things he said to me before the shooting. You didn't see the look on Spencer's face when he professed his love for me causing her to run straight into the line of fire. He didn't save anyone Kyla…"

Kyla looked at me with a strange look and stood up. "I don't know exactly what happened between the three of you tonight but…I can't believe that Aiden would deliberately try to hurt you. He's just not that kind of person. I know he's not that type of person."

"You know? I don't even know who he is anymore."

"He's still your best friend Ashley. You have this love for each other that is unbreakable."

"No Kyla. He's not the same person I knew as my best friend. Something has changed with him…and please don't say love. The only person that I love is sitting in that room dying inside and I can't hold her." I said pointing to Spencer's door.

"You're just upset about what happened." She said trying to justify my anger towards Aiden.

I gave up trying to explain to her what I was feeling and just rested my head on the back wall. I heard a familiar voice down the hallway as frantic steps were coming down towards me.

I opened my eyes and saw Mr. and Mrs. C running down to Spencer's room. Mr. C's eyes were full of pain and his usual cheery complexion was now a sheet of white. Mrs. C looked as broken as her husband and I knew that they had finally heard the news of the shooting.

I had tried calling them earlier but no one ever picked up. When they rushed Spencer to the hospital I told the police officers that one of the deceased was a friend of mine and that they needed to get a hold of his parents. They took the number and address from me and I jumped in my car to make my way to the hospital.

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I had run inside and looked around as other students and their families were beginning to appear. I didn't know how many people had been injured but only one person mattered to me at the moment. I hadn't noticed the injury to Spencer's back until a paramedic stopped to check us out.

He had turned Spencer and saw the mark and her unconscious body and quickly grabbed the gurney to take her to the hospital. My heart had been pounding the whole way and I feared that I would lose her.

I rushed up to the woman at the front desk of the emergency room. "Excuse me…Can you tell me where Spencer Carlin is?"

She ignored me as she shuffled around papers and made calls. I was getting frustrated with her lack of focus on me and I slammed my hands down on the counter.

"Spencer Carlin…C-A-R-L-I-N…Spencer…please tell me where she is." I said feeling tears of frustration form in my eyes.

The woman continued to ignore me and I threw my hands up in the air. I checked past the doors to the rooms and made a decision. I looked back at the front station and waited to make my move.

When all eyes had moved to the entrance of the hospital, I snuck in behind a nurse who was running inside. I knew I had to be quick because my prom dress was a dead give away that I didn't work there.

I avoided eye contact with everyone in the hall and looked at the name of the chart on each door. I kept looking and moving along until I saw Spencer's name. I peered inside the room and saw her lying there. She was still out of it and I took a deep breath as her chest rose and fell in an almost peaceful rhythm.

I saw a doctor rushing through the hallway and quickly looked for a place to hide. I saw the women's bathroom a few doors down and ran inside. I held my breath and waited a few minutes. I slowly opened the door and peered out and saw a nurse run into Spencer's room.

The nurse ran out a minute later and I had to make sure Spencer was alright. I slid out of the bathroom and looked both ways before opening the door. I turned around looking once more out the door and shut it carefully.

I turned and saw Spencer's eyes looking back at my own with a confused look. I couldn't help but look back at her with a sadness in my eyes.

I saw her open and close her mouth as if she wanted to speak and I quickly rushed to get her a glass of water. I held the cup of water as the liquid made its way into her mouth.

She looked back at me still with a confused expression.

"What…What happened to me?" She choked out.

"A bullet grazed your back…" I said softly.

"A bullet? Who tried to shoot me?"

"Some stupid gang bangers…they weren't after you…but they never are and that's why innocent people get hurt…" I laced my voice with disgust at the bastards who were responsible for all this pain.

"So…I'm going to be ok?"

I nodded and put a small smile on my face to keep her calm.

"Where did they do the shooting? The last thing I remember is leaving the house for prom…" I began to get worried as I could see that she really couldn't remember.

"You don't remember anything after that?" I was in a way relieved that the whole 'Aiden' situation wasn't on her mind but what would happen if she remembered?

"Not really…I had this horrible nightmare where someone kept screaming 'Gun' over and over but nothing else stands out."

"We were leaving prom when the shooting happened." I said quickly trying to avoid any further details of the night before the shooting took place.

"Oh god…did anyone else get hurt? I mean are Glen and Clay hurt? Chelsea…what about her baby? And Kyla…please don't tell me anyone got hurt." She was clearly getting worried as the thoughts were running through her head. I wasn't sure how I was going to be able to tell her about her brother.

I reached for her hand and tried to calm the trembling that had taken over my body. A tear fell from my eye and slowly slid down my face.

"Oh god…what is it? You have to tell me Ashley!" She screamed at me making me flinch.

"I don't know if I can Spencer." I said while squeezing her hand.

"Tell me Ashley…I have a right to know." She did have a right to know but how could I break her heart like that.

"Glen is fine….Chelsea and the baby are safe…Kyla is alright also…" I looked into her eyes and tried to hold the tears back.

"Ok you mentioned Glen, Chelsea, Kyla and the baby…What about Clay?" She stared at me intently waiting for my response. I closed my eyes hoping that I wouldn't have to tell her the horrible news.

"What about Clay??? Tell me Ashley!!!" She yelled at me roughly.

"Clay…" I couldn't get the words out and I choked back the sobs that were taking over my body.

"No…no…no…" She repeated over and over.

"I'm so sorry Spencer." I whispered softly to her.

"Nooo…Nooo…You're lying! You have to be lying! Life wouldn't be this unfair…It's a lie…Tell me it's a lie!" Her voice echoed in the room as she yelled at nothing in particular.

"Clay's gone." I finally said looking up into her blue eyes.

"NOOO!!!" She screamed once more and then her eyes closed and she body went limp.

"Spencer…Spencer…baby…" I said over and over trying to get her to come back to me. She was out again and my heart broke. I held her hand and lowered my head. I wasn't going to leave her here alone.

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My head sprung up as I heard a gasp coming from Spencer's body. Her hands were clenched into fists and I looked at her and saw a look of anger in her eyes. It made me recoil a bit because I had never seen such rage in her eyes before.

"Spencer? Are you ok?" I asked her a bit hesitantly.

"Get out." She told me coldly.

"But…" I didn't understand why she was being so cold and looked at her in confusion.

"Get out." She said this again never letting her hands relax out of the fist shape they had formed.

"I'm not leaving you." I said never standing up. I wasn't going to leave her. She had to know this.

"I remember what happened." I couldn't help but flinch as I knew that the one discussion I didn't want to ever talk about again was about to be addressed.

"What do you remember?" I asked looking into her eyes.

She laughed angrily and shook her head. "You and Aiden…I knew that something was going on…and you kept denying it over and over."

"Spencer there is nothing going on between Aiden and me." Why didn't she believe me? There really was nothing going on.

"Don't…just don't…I saw you two on that dance floor…his hands on yours…you couldn't even look at me…"

"I was in shock Spencer…he just sprung all this stuff on me…I didn't know how to react." I couldn't explain why I had reacted the way I did and I threw my hands up in the air in frustration. I had to tell her what my decision was. That she was who I loved and always had loved not Aiden.

"Ashley…just go…please…I can't even look at you right now…why don't you go run to Aiden…leave me alone to grieve for my brother." She turned her head away from me and her words stung. Run to Aiden? Is that what she thought I would do?

I looked at Spencer's back and tried to respond but I couldn't. She hated me I was sure of it now. A sob escaped my mouth as the realization hit me. I made my way to the door and opened it. Another sob came and I couldn't help but pound the door with my palm letting out my pain and frustration. I closed the door and fell against it sobbing.

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Mr. C opened Spencer's door for Mrs. C and noticed me sitting there. He looked at me with sad eyes and opened his arms. I rushed into his embrace holding him tightly and I could feel silent sobs from his body.

"I'm so sorry Mr. C." I said into his shoulder.

He said nothing as he held me tight. I pulled back and saw a man who looked like he had lost everything. I guess in a large way he did lose everything.

"Spencer's going to be ok." I said to him. Maybe trying to reassure my own mind.

He nodded and turned to make his way into the room.

"Mr. C…" He turned his head to look at me. "Tell Spencer that I love her and that if she needs me I will be right here. That I'm not going anywhere….that it was never a choice that she was always the one." I said with pleading eyes.

He looked at me with a confused look but nodded his head in agreement. I resumed my position on the chair and closed my eyes as a wave of exhaustion knocked me out.