"I'm not bringing him onto your ship," Kylo tells his father, and his voice is firmer than he thought he would manage. He had never been the most authoritative figure without his helmet's voice changer (Oh, how he missed it.) Perhaps it's parenting that did this to him. "Knowing you, you're smuggling something dangerous, and there is more than one party hunting you down as we speak. I will not put Anakin in danger."
"You can't stay here alone," Han argues, and even after so many years, he's as difficult to read as when Kylo was a young boy. Han knows him too well and even without the force he can skim the surface of his thoughts with a single glance. He can tell he wants to run, run, run, and never look back. And he would, without hesitation, if it means his son may be safe.
But he cannot flee now. He knows his father will not allow him to. And being the stubborn fool he is, he will not flee with him, despite the impending danger that lies in remaining on this ship. His best bet is to fight alongside him, and flee with Anakin and Rey when they have lowered their guard.
"You have other things to worry about," he because he feels the presence of unwanted visitors nudging at him. It only causes more panic and he wants more than ever to flee. "Someone's come to pay you a visit. I feel their approach. I will help you deal with them, but they cannot know." Kylo takes a deep breath. "No one can know about Anakin."
Kylo leaves no room for argument as he raises his eyes to meet his father's. Kylo knows what Han thinks he's seeing, a hint of something good, the tiniest shred of his beloved son. But he isn't. Han is looking at someone new. Not his precious child, but not Kylo Ren either.
There is a grumbled roar, and he turns his eyes to Chewbacca. He seems to hesitate on his proposal, before agreeing with a tight nod.
"Ani, you're going to stay on the ship with Uncl... With Chewie," he explains, and then adds, "and BB-8." Anakin stares wide eyed as his mom places him down carefully on the seat, but doesn't seem all too put off by the idea. "Rey and I are going with your Grandpa."
At this, Anakin seems to panic, but BB-8 rolls over. Their beeping seems to sooth the child, even though Anakin understands binary about as well as he understands Huttese. Anakin releases Kylo's sleeve, allowing him to straighten up and take a step back.
He faces Chewie. He gazes at him and Kylo wonders if he remembers how he used to announce to everyone that Chewie was his favourite uncle, always to Luke's chagrin. "If there is any danger, you will fly this ship away, with or without me," his voice dips down low, dangerous, and he doesn't think anyone on this ship has heard this tone from him before, "I do not care how many lives it takes to save his. It is over my dead body that the First Order takes him."
Kylo had been right about his father smuggling something dangerous. He just hadn't assumed it would be alive. Rathtars, at that. The man was utterly insane. Kylo wondered how they got them aboard in the first place, just as one of the creatures attempted to attack through the thick glass. Behind him, he felt Rey and Finn jump, but he simply sneered at the beast.
If anything, it certainly explained the lack of a crew. It's just a pity his father hadn't been eaten as well. It would have saved him plenty of trouble.
"How many are we expecting?" Han asks, knocking him from his fantasy of watching his father be consumed by hungry Rathtars.
"Two small parties, numbers unknown," he says. They have already docked their ships, and he expects they will burst in any moment. He rests his hand on his lightsaber at his side, as if to reassure himself it was still there. "Who the hell did you piss off this time?"
Han scowls in response but has no time to snap something back because the alarms have gone off. Instead, he lifts up one of the grates and urges them to hide. How noble of him, to try and keep them from getting involved as if they aren't already. He simply scowls at him pointedly, and he seems to get the point.
The grate has just settled in place above Finn and Rey's head when one of the doors swings open, revealing one of the small groups. By the look of it, they didn't come to talk. Not that he expected anyone on the bad end of a business deal to want to talk.
He zones most of them out, choosing instead to mentally prepare for the fight that awaited him. Two years without a fight had left him itching for this moment, but it also left him rusty and severely out of practice. He could not afford to make a mistake.
"You know... The First Order is looking for three fugitives and a droid," One of the men barks, and they have his attention. Three? After Jakku, he would be stupid to believe he and Rey were not marked. But Three? Kylo's thoughts immediately jumped to Anakin, but even if they saw his escape, they should not have been able to see him. That left the stormtrooper, but that would mean... He had been running, he had deflected, and he had nearly killed him in front of his son for no reason.
Well, he certainly wasn't going to apologize.
"And why should I care?" Han's voice is steady throughout his lie.
"Because that one behind you with you matches the description perfectly," the man says as if this was reason enough for Han to hand him and the others over. The man's voice is confident enough that he clearly does not know who he's dealing with. "Hand over the other fugitives and the droids and we'll forget about all of this."
Han reaches for his blaster defiantly, and many things happen at once.
Firstly, Kylo is holding his activated saber before his father can withdraw his blaster and has blocked four shots with ease. It lights up the hall, and he can feel its raw power, as bright as the light it emanates. It is a comfort to hold. A comfort he knew he missed desperately but never dared to indulge himself with.
Secondly, someone (he's certainly not naming names, Rey) in an attempt to fix the situation, has made it infinitely worse by freeing three raging, starving Rathtars. After living each day fearing the arrival of the First Order on his doorstep, his terror barely registers on the scales. It's his father that drags him out of harm's way, though, and then they're bolting through the twisting passages.
The sounds of screaming and frantic blasters follow them, but it's a sound Kylo has learnt to ignore well. He needs to get to the ship, to protect Anakin no matter what. So he and his father scramble from chamber to chamber, until all that is left between them and the Millennium Falcon is a single door. He wastes no time fiddling with controls, simply slamming his lightsaber into the panel. The door swings open, and within seconds they're boarding the ship, and they aren't the only ones.
Kylo is relieved seeing Rey and FN-2187 rush aboard, but he doesn't dwell on it because his father is shouting orders at everyone. Anakin is curled safely in the furry grasp of Chewbacca, and while he looks slightly frightened, it is clear he is safe. With this assurance, Kylo rushes to follow Han's orders.
Within minutes, they have hit lightspeed and they are rushing through space. Kylo takes this time to recover his son from Chewbacca, and he is quick to climb into his arms. It's an instant relief to hold him, to feel his breath against his neck as he curls against him. His dark hair tickles his chin and he realizes he's shaking.
He falls heavily into the nearest seat and clings to his son life a lifetime as he holds the tears back. They're looking for him, they're looking for him and the stormtrooper and the droid and the fragile peace he had become accustomed to had finally shattered. He had always known, but he had never expected it to hit him so hard.
In one day, his life had done a complete one-eighty. Life on Jakku had been hard. It had been hot and sandy and they often had days they found themselves starving, but it had been simplistic. It had been survival. Now he didn't have that. He couldn't drop off the map again. Not with his father knowing of his situation, not with the First Order aware of his sudden activity.
Kylo, by some miracle, keeps himself from bursting into tears. He's still shaking when Anakin eventually drifts off to sleep in his arms and watching him sleep soundly seems to bring him back to solid ground. When he looks up, Han and Rey have joined them in the main hold. FN-2187 is sitting, as far away from him as he could while remaining in the same room, and he sends him a nasty glare.
"You, FN-2187." The ex-stormtrooper jumps at being addressed as such but does not correct him. "Does the First Order truly believe me to be dead?"
He looks startled at this question, but nods. "That's what they told us. When you went missing. Snoke killed you for deflecting."
He skims his thoughts for any hint of a lie, but there is none. Snoke turned him into an example, proof of what happens when you go against the First Order. But that does not mean he has stopped looking for him. After his betrayal, he would give up no opportunity to punish him for his insolence.
"So you weren't sent after us?"
FN-2187's eyes flicker down to the sleeping toddler in his arms, and back to his face in an instant. "Of course not. I helped a prisoner escape, we crashed on Jakku. They were after the droid, not me!"
The droid. Of course. He spins on Rey, who is deadly calm in the face of Kylo's anger.
"What's the droid carrying that's so damn important?" he spits, perhaps with more fire than necessary. Rey didn't deserve his anger.
"Oh, it's..." She glances at the droid, to Han to Kylo. She dips his head and admits, "It's a map. To Luke Skywalker. BB-8 has to deliver it to the resistance."
Both he and Han suck in a breath. In any other world, one where he hadn't deflected the First Order, he could see himself jump at the chance to find his old teacher. Snoke would have expected it of him, to find him and end Luke's life. In this world, he simply sighs in defeat and slumps back in his seat. He closes his eyes and tells himself to take a deep breath.
"You're... Han Solo," Rey begins reluctantly, "Are the legends true, did you know him? Luke Skywalker?"
Kylo lets out a snort of laughter, and when he opens his eyes, his cold gaze lands on his father. "He knew him alright," he mutters and the venom drips from every word, "tell them how well you knew Uncle Luke, Dad ."
Han glares back, but his heart isn't in it. Instead, he turns to face an awestruck Rey with a look of defeat. "I knew him, before he went into hiding..." He takes a deep breath, and his eyes flicker to Kylo, who is doing his best to look aloof. "He was training the next generation of Jedi and... his apprentice turned on him. He blamed himself and went into hiding."
Kylo doesn't feel guilt, but he doesn't feel good either, so he stands and marches from the room without making eye contact. He can feel the rush of discomfort that settles over the room with his silent admittance. He can feel his father's sadness and Rey's confusion and Finn's fear.
He collapses onto the rickety, dusty cots in the crew's quarters, instantly curling himself around Anakin. He sleeps on, oblivious to the world, oblivious of his father's hideous past, and of the dangers that lie in their future.
His father's words have struck a nerve and before he knows it, he is muffling sobs into a hard, under stuffed pillow. It is many moments before he can calm down, and when he does, he forces herself to match Anakin's breathing.
It seems like hours later when Rey comes in to check on him. When she does, she is a stew of emotions - sadness, betrayal, confusion, but always with that lingering foolish hopefulness and fondness and love. Kylo feels his chest tighten because it's not just Anakin it's directed at, but him as well.
He can't face Rey. When the girl approaches the bunk, he pretends to sleep.
