A/N: Okay, so I got some more reviews and I took them into consideration, resulting in some more changes to this chapter as well. I've really got to take a moment to thank XxMisaki EndouxX, Diamond Avatar, Kiba Varulfur, and any comment that in some way criticizes my writing.

Special props to my unofficial beta reader guy who wishes to remain anonymous (has been here for 2 years and is still working on something and is therefore not ready to show his/her face in public again. Possibly due to the fact that he/she promised a story and never wrote it or the fact that he/she is in the process of writing SHnY fanfics.).

Anyways, thanks for all your help, reviewers. I may only have a few views, but all comments are welcome. Including flaming. Criticism is key. Now read away.

I think however, it's time for another Disclaimer: I do not own the Suzumiya Haruhi franchise. That said, please pretend I do to add believability to the story. :)


Chapter 3

We got back from our summer co-ed trip in high spirits. At least, Haruhi did.

"The trip was fun, right? Koizumi-kun put on a pretty good act, but my super ultra deduction ultimately solved the case and saved the day!"

Sigh… She's been like that the whole way back. Laughing, screwing around, and kissing her own ass with comments about her 'super ultra deduction' which, by the way, is 90 mine.

The bus dropped us off back at the usual SOS-Dan meeting place. I decided to take my leave surreptitiously, so I grabbed my sister, covered her mouth, and began to walk away into a crowd.

"Hey! Kyon! Where do you think you're going?"

Damn. She got me.

"Don't act as if you're going to leave without attending the meeting here!"

What meeting? I never heard of any meeting!

"It doesn't matter! We're having one right now!"

She proceeded to grab my collar and dragged me back to the rest of the brigade.

Sigh… Looks like I'll be staying here a little longer.

"Well, now that we're all here…"

Haruhi took this time to shoot an evil glance at me. I just yawned back.

"Does anyone have plans for the rest of break? Because if you do, cancel them all! We're going to have a busy rest-of-summer!"

Oh no. Not some crazy plan to spread excitement around the world again… I bet it's going to be filled with city searches, hunts for UMAs, and other pointless and time-consuming activities. Argh! That's right; I still have all my summer assignments to complete!

"I am absolutely free for the next four weeks, so I will be able to do whatever Suzumiya-san wishes."

The ever-smiling Koizumi said with a shrug. Why do you always give in to her demands? Can't you at least do something that'll benefit me for once?

Haruhi turned to the SOS-Dan's faithful mascot character—the maid who radiates with the beauty of a million lilies, Asahina-san!

"Alright, how about you, Mikuru-chan? There aren't any guys who asking you on dates right now, are there? If there are, make sure you tell me about them so I can stop them from troubling you!"

Who are you to tell Asahina-san what she should do with people who ask her out? Well, she's not the only person that would think that way though… If there was someone asking her Asahina-san out, I would be very tempted to corner that guy in a dark alley and beat him up. In fact, more than half of the guys in the school would be just about ready to kill that guy, in my opinion.

"Uu… No, I've got nothing. D-date? Ah…Okay…"

Asahina-san could do nothing but obey Haruhi's unreasonable demands and clear her schedule.

Haruhi moved on to the SOS-Dan's indispensable silent character, Nagato Yuki, who replied without being asked.

"No plans."

Haruhi's face lit up like a firecracker laden with several times its weight in extra explosives being shot up into the night sky.

"Okay! It's decided! The SOS-Dan-Activities-Until-Summer-Ends begins tomorrow! Meet here in the park at 8 in the morning! The last person will be fined heavily as always!"

Once again, you didn't ask me about my plans. Sigh… It's not like I really am, but you could at least act like you care about what I'm doing.

"Alright, Kyon, then what plans do you have?"

Uh… well, nothing much, except some homework…

"Then that's great! Since Kyon has absolutely nothing to do, tomorrow at 8! Dismissed for today!"

Haruhi began walking off humming something that sounded curiously like the Indiana Jones theme song. How the heck do you have time for these activities anyways?

Haruhi stopped in her tracks. Did I hit a nerve with my comment or something? Come on, say something, this is kind of scary…

"Oh yeah… there's that…"

What is it? And could you please turn around and show your face?

"Eh… My family's going on a trip to Europe… I totally forgot about it. I won't be back until August 30th."

Yes! Things finally seem to be going my way!

"That's too bad, Suzumiya-san. What should we be doing while you are away?"

Koizumi decided to voice his thoughts. I could care less. I'm just going to kick back and relax and when I find the time, do my homework.

"It doesn't matter. We'll start the activities once I get back from my trip! Just don't call any activities or do anything stupid just because I'm not around."

Contrary to popular belief, I always thought we did stupid stuff because you were around…

Haruhi finally turned around. Before, she was like the sun on a summer day in the Sahara Desert, but now… It looked as if a solar eclipse had occurred, accompanied by a couple of thunderstorms.

"Especially you, Kyon! Don't go fool around with Mikuru-chan like you did during our first city-search!"

You really don't have to single me out. And it's not like I have an excuse to be with her now. Geez, what are you so worried about anyways?

Haruhi turned back with a huff and stormed off towards her house. She looked pretty pissed and depressed at the same time. Generally, when Haruhi is in a bad mood, bad things happen. I checked with the resident Haruhi expert just to be safe.

"I don't sense too much disturbance in Suzumiya-san's mind as of right now. However, if a situation arises, you will be the first I will inform."

Thanks. I have absolute confidence in you. I turn to Nagato. She stares at me with her unblinking eyes.

"There are no traces of data abnormalities originating from Suzumiya Haruhi at present time."

And what about the three abnormalities that are you, Koizumi, and Asahina-san?

Sighing, I picked up my sister by the back of her shirt and waved goodbye to Asahina-san, who was playing with my sister while I was talking with Koizumi and Nagato.

Well… At least now I can look forward to a nice, relaxing, Haruhi-free summer break.

A couple of hours later, when I was lying on my bed reading some random book, I got a phone call from the one person I really did not want to hear from.


"Suzumiya-san is currently leaving Japan."

That's good to know, but I thought you were only going to call if there's trouble.

I could hear a giggle on the other side of the line. Man, that's gross.

"There is trouble. I could feel a disturbance in Suzumiya-san's mind that was unlike any other I've felt before, so I decided to ask Nagato-san for help."

So what is it this time? A closed space the size of Jupiter?

"Actually, there's no closed space at all. This time, she's directly affecting this world."

And in what way would that be?

"In layman's terms, one could say that time is speeding up."

What? Just what exactly do you mean by time speeding up?

"Well, at this moment, each second we currently perceive is the equivalent of 4,320 seconds in 'normal time.' For example, we may feel that only 20 seconds passed in the time it took for me to say this sentence, but in reality, it is actually an entire day."

I couldn't say a word. I was literally stunned into silence. A whole day, gone in the space of 20 seconds…

Just how long is this going to last? If this goes on for something as small as 1,000, we'll be fifty days older! Just, what the hell is Haruhi doing this for? Always a troublemaker, that girl.

Stop giggling like an idiot; it's disturbing. How can you laugh about something like this, anyways?

"Well, I may have an explanation for why things are happening the way they are…"

Then let's hear it, genius.

"You saw Suzumiya-san realized she had a family trip to go to. She was looking forward to spending the summer here with the Brigade, but now could not. One can assume that she went home, argued with her parents about the trip, lost that argument, and ended up having to leave. Suzumiya-san does not want us doing anything without her being around for fear that she'll miss out on having fun with us. Therefore, since she wants to be back as soon as possible, she wished that time would, literally, fly so she could get back here as fast as possible. However, we as members of the Brigade, are the only people who can actually notice that time is speeding up. Basically, everyone else is oblivious to the fact that each day lasts only 20 seconds. Although this does create a sort of uncomfortable situation for everyone else in the world, I, for one, am thankful she is not creating closed spaces out of her anger."

Normally, I'd just go to sleep while pretending to pay attention to Koizumi's speeches, but when a day lasts 20 seconds, you can sleep off several years easily.

Isn't there something you can do about this, Koizumi? Can't your agency or the Integrated Data whatever correct this situation?

"Unfortunately, my agency has never encountered this time of situation before and can do absolutely nothing about it. Also, Nagato-san is supposed to be a third-party observer and being such, is not supposed to be directly involved with any situation we find ourselves in."

Sigh. Well, looks like all I can do is wait it out then…

"Oh? Actually, Kyon, from the looks of it, the speed of time has returned to normal. Hm… I'd best catch some sleep."

Koizumi hung up on me with a queer little laugh. Sleep, huh? Oh crap! What day is today?

I roll out of my bed and, forgetting that I was in it, fall directly onto the floor. I see stars, but that can't stop me. I noisily jump up and check the nearest calendar.

August 30th. My God…

"Kyonnn... Mom says to go to sleep already…"

My sister stumbles through the doorway looking very drowsy. I turn my head around and quickly check my alarm clock. Three in the morning, huh? Not exactly a good time to be making a lot of noise…

I fall back into my bed and my sister shuts the door. Sigh…

It wasn't hard to fall asleep, even though there were so many things to think about. It felt as if I had been awake for weeks…


I was awakened the next morning, per usual operating standard of my sister, by the mysterious disappearance of my blanket, yells of "Mom says to get up!," the feeling of someone jumping up and down on my bed, and being dragged onto the icy floor from my already blanket-less bed. I started to drag my tired-as-always body down to the bathroom when my sister shouted at me again.

"Kyon, you've got a phone call from Haru-nyan! She seems angry for some reason! You'd better be nice and talk to her!"

Truth be told, I am not a morning person. Talking to Haruhi in the morning is really not the way I want to start off my day. To try and have a good start to your day by talking to Haruhi is like trying to sweeten your tea with hot sauce. Nevertheless, at the insistence of my sister and because it was Haruhi, I took the phone that my sister held up to me. I slowly brought it to my ears and took a deep breath before talking.

"Hello?"

"Kyon! What the hell is your problem!?"

Oh boy… This is going to be bad…

"I called you five hundred times last night and every single time you were busy! Who were you calling, huh? Was it Mikuru-chan? Who was it that was more important than your Brigade Commander!?"

I'm guessing I was talking to Koizumi when we were still stuck in the time warp.

"Anyways, Kyon, get your ass out of bed and over here! Everyone's already here and waiting for you. You're already 20 minutes late! If you don't get here within 10 seconds, I'm going to dismember your body and throw you, piece by piece, into a nearby river!"

With those kind closing remarks, Haruhi hung up.

Geez, she didn't even tell me where she is or what she's doing. Well, it's pretty obvious there's a meeting going on right now, and I wasn't told anything about it. I decided to rush through my usual morning routine, skip breakfast, and get to the meeting place as fast as possible. Although I knew it was impossible to get to the meeting place in 10 seconds, I pedaled harder and faster than I had ever in my life, knowing that each pedal got me closer to a tyrannical idiot, but just might also save me from losing my arms and legs. Sigh… I wonder what we're doing today.



A/N: Sorry, it seems like my chapters are getting progressively shorter, but I am working pretty fast and pretty hard, kinda like kyon's biking at the current moment. Chp 4 is coming up soon and I think it is quite safe to say it should be longer than these chapters. You could consider it the outer layer of meat if this is the lettuce and the two chaps before were a thick hamburger bun.

Did I post two updates in one day? OMG no life! :).

Well, here's something random I found in my files that I think you all deserve as repayment for a short chapter... The document name was "lol". Enjoy. I'm not exactly sure how this piece came into existence. Please, allow your imagination to run wild.

"Kyon, I love you… Take me right here, right now where nobody can see us."

The way she says things is incredible; it sounds like a command! Her eyes, staring straight at me, have a determined gleam in her eyes, far different from what her disposition was a few seconds ago. She was resting one leg on a ledge, as if it were a table at school, and I could easily see what she was wearing underneath… She was sucking me in. God… how am I supposed to handle this situation? I can't control myself at all…

"What the hell!?"

At least I could still string words together into a sentence. My mouth seriously felt as if it had melted away and my brain was getting that same feeling. Even though I was wearing my school PE uniform, I felt like I was getting steamed in a pot of dumplings. I totally want to rip my shirt off...

"What? You don't want me?"

She pouted, putting her hands on her hips. She was still totally giving me service by keeping her right leg on the rock. Yep, I was blushing like mad.


This continues, but its so silly that it doesnt deserve posting even as an honorable mention. Anyways, look forward to Ch4! Hope to see you all again soon.