Thank you again to everyone who has read and left reviews on this story, I appreciate everyone of you. This one is a little on the shorter side, but I hope you guys enjoy this chapter! Happy reading!

As always, I apologize for any spelling and or grammatical issues that I may have missed.


Erin POV

I don't even know why I'm doing this. My agreement to this was a spur of the moment thing and I wasn't even sure of it then, I just needed him to leave so I could get to work. But now that I've had the entire day to think about it, I'm even less sure. I've considered standing him up more than a few times, but I really do want to hear what he has to say. Do I think it'll change anything? No. But I do want to figure out what made him think that he could do something like that to me, throwing the previous four years away for a drunken one night stand. One drink. Then I can leave. I can do this. Besides, how hard can it be?

I take a deep breath and step out of the 300, my bag slung over my shoulder as the evening breeze swirls around my dress. I swing open the heavy wood door, the hanging white lights setting a mood that I'm not sure I want.

I spot him quickly near the end of the bar peering down at his phone as a Hawks games plays in the background. He's wearing an olive green Henley and a pair of dark jeans, the muscles on his arms bulging through the thin fabric. He looks so much better than he did in college. I take another deep breath and walk over to join him.

"You came," He says as he notices me, the surprise in his voice obvious. He really did think that this was a long shot.

"I said I would didn't I?" I quip.

"Well yeah, but I didn't actually think you would,"

"Whiskey and a gin and tonic," Gabby interrupts as she slides the two drinks across the bar.

"You remembered," I say, slightly surprised as I take the glass of clear liquid, the lime segment bobbing up and down against the cubes of ice. It's been six years, I really didn't think that he would have used the brain space to keep it. But then again, I also knew exactly what he was going to order.

"Of course," He says, almost surprised that I would think he forgot.

"Alright," I say, as I take my place at the bar laying my bag on the table next to me, "So what did you want to tell me?"

"Well, I guess I just wanted to tell you that I never cheated on you," He says, his facial expression stoic as he relays the word. I can only imagine that mine is anything but. Those five words. I never cheated on you. They'll flip my entire world upside down, pulling the rug out from under me as I realize that everything I've known for the past six years has been a lie.

"What?" I demand.

"I never cheated on you," He says again.

"Okay, why should I believe you? Let's say that I do believe you, why the hell would you tell me that you cheated when you didn't?" I demand. None of this makes any sense. He knew that I have trust and I've gone the last six years thinking that he lied to me. Now he's telling me that he lied to me about lying to me?

"Just hear me out okay?" He pleads.

"Fine," I say, taking a small sip of my drink, the alcohol almost burning as it flows down my throat, I feel like I might need it.

"That day you graduated at dinner that night, I got an email from the Army. I was being called back into duty, I shipped out six days later," He explains.

"Why didn't you say anything?" I ask.

"Because you didn't sign up to be an Army wife," He admits.

"That wasn't your call to make, you should have told me," I say. I almost want to get louder, but I don't want to draw attention to us. A lot of the people in this bar work at the 21st and I don't want either of them to have to answer questions about this.

"I know that now, I've regretted not telling you everyday since then," He says with a solemn look on his face. "But at that point, I wasn't even thinking straight."

"So you told me that you cheated on me?" I ask, still trying to wrap my head around everything.

"Yes," He says simply.

"Why?" I demand. It just doesn't fundamentally make sense to me. Jay knew that cheating was near the worst breach of trust for me, why would he lie about that?

"Because Erin, I didn't want you to put your life on hold for me. I know you, you would have spent every minute of every day, worrying about me." He's right. People have told me my entire life that I care too much and that I love too hard. I would have been constantly consumed by the fear that something had happened. "And I knew that there was a good chance that I wasn't going to make it home. I would rather have you hate me for the rest of your life rather than letting you break and fall apart. I wanted more than that for you,"

"But then you made it back," I say, still trying to process all of the events that are currently spinning through my head, "why didn't you call me then?"

"You have to understand, when I came back, I was in a really bad place. I wasn't the guy that you knew and I probably still am not that guy.I couldn't be here. I moved out to LA and I moved in with my cousin for a couple of months until I get back on my feet and figure things out. When I did, I still wasn't ready to come home. So I got a job working in Narcotics with the LAPD and I stayed there for almost five years. One day, I just decided that I needed to come home, I missed my town. Besides, even if I did call you when I got back, would have picked up the phone?" I look down at my drink, suddenly infatuated by the ice swirling through the liquid. He's right. I wouldn't have picked up the phone, I wouldn't have even acknowledged him.

"Why should I believe you?" I ask.

"Ask Hank," He says abruptly.

"What?" I demand.

"Ask Hank, he knows everything," And now it all makes sense. That's why he wanted me to talk to Jay. He wasn't defending him, he was trying to get me to uncover the truth. But two emotions are battling it out for dominance within me, the first being a sense of relief that Hank hadn't hired the cheating scum bag that I thought he was. But I also felt the ultimate sense of betrayal, both of the most important men in my life lied to me and Hank has continued to lie to me for the past six years and if Hank knew, who else did? What about Camille? Had she been lying to me too?

"Hank knows?" I question. There's no way in hell. He wouldn't have kept this from me. I know that Hank has secrets, but they've always had to do with his work, things that he didn't want to bring home to us. But he wouldn't have kept this from me. Would he?

"Yes, I talked to him that night after dinner." He tells me.

"Jay..."

"Erin listen to me, I loved you. I would never have cheated on you or done anything to hurt you. I-I," He stammers.

"What Jay? What?" I demand, my voice slowly rising as people around us begin to stare.

"I was going to ask you to marry me!" He blurts out. I feel like my heart may have stopped in my chest.

"What?" I say in shock. I had no idea. Usually girls can see the signs coming, at least that's what I've heard from all of my married friends, but I didn't see that coming at all. Did I think that I was going to end up marrying him? Yes. But not at 22, maybe a few years down the line. But definitely not then. Though if he had asked me that night, there is not a doubt in my mind that I would have said yes.

"That night at your apartment, that was the plan. I loved you Erin and I was ready to marry you."

"I'm sorry," I say as I get up, leaving my drink behind on the bar. "I believe you, but you still lied to me. You've been lying to me for over half a decade, Hank too. I just, I need time to think."

"Okay, that's fair," He says, clearly disappointed, though he does understand where I'm coming from.

"I'll call you okay, I promise. Just give me some space okay?" I say. I believe him, I do. I had trouble believing him at first, but as he kept talking, I just knew in my heart that he wasn't lying to me.

"Thank you, for believing me," He says as those eyes reach out to me.

"I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt," I say with a weak smile. "Thank you for telling me the truth,"

"I'm never going to lie to you again," He assures me, that same guilt from this morning shining through those big blue eyes.

"I'd appreciate that," I say as I grab my bag from off the bar. "I'll call, I promise,"

"Okay," He says simply.

"Goodbye Jay," I say as I turn to leave.

"Bye Er," He says behind me. I feel my breath catch in my chest as I hear my nickname. No one has ever called me that except for him. It seems like such an obvious shortening, but it's always been him, only him. No one before him and no one since him. Just him.


"Aunt Lindy? I hear from across the room. I look up to see my sweet little goddaughter Reese lingering in the doorway of the family, her normally straight blonde hair wild around her face as she clutches her tiny yellow blanket and a now ragged stuffed tiger to her chest, her blue eyes wide.

"Aren't you supposed to be asleep?" I ask before tossing my phone aside as she runs over to me, curling into my side.

It's been a little over a week since I talked to Jay at Molly's and I still don't know what to do about it. Do I want to get back together with him? Does he want to get back together with me? Are we going to be friends? Are we going to be cordial exes that see each other every so often? I don't know. But progress was made. I'm not mad at him anyone, I think I'm starting to understand why he did it, but I can't trust him.

Even if he did do it to protect me, it doesn't change the fact that he lied to me and he's been lying to me. It also doesn't do anything to help me wrap my head around this crazy situation. If I wasn't living this scenario and someone was telling me about it, I don't think I would believe it. Even if it was me and this was coming from anybody other than Jay, I don't think I would believe them. But he's different.

I haven't talked to Jay or Hank since that night and I've been avoiding the district like the plague. I don't want to face any of them, I don't want to deal with the questions or the looks.

I've been throwing myself into my work in the meantime, trying desperately to distract myself so when Em told us that her babysitter cancelled for tonight, I volunteered before she could say otherwise. I always love spending time with her kids, but I really needed it this week. I know that both Emily and Celia, even Kat who I've spoken to a couple times on the phone have noticed that something is up. I know that Celia just assumes that it's simply him being back that's weirding me out, but none of them have asked any questions about it.

"I tried, but my eyes wouldn't close," She tells me, looking up with those big baby blue eyes.

"And I'm sure you tried so hard," I tease as she curls up closer to me and I lay my chin on top of her head.

"I did I promise!" She assures me.

"Okay missy," I say with a grin, though I don't really believe her.

"Will you lay with me? Mama always does that when I can't fall asleep,"

"Yeah, c'mon," I tell her as I pull her off the couch, dragging her by the hand as I urge her back up the stairs. I feel her start to lag on the fifth or sixth step, so I eventually just swoop her up into my arms, holding her against my chest as we advance towards her room. I don't bother to turn a light on, knowing that it'll just wake her up more than she already is.

I drop her into her bed, laying down next to her as she rolls onto her stomach. I've been through this more than a few times with her, Reese never ever wants to go to sleep, it's been that way since Emily brought her home four years ago. So I know her tricks.

I begin rub circles on her back with the palm of my hand as I hum a lullaby and I quickly hear her breathing begins to slow and soft snores start filling the void of silence as my hum fades away. Success, works every time. I drop a soft kiss on the top of her head and creep slowly out of the room, leaving the door open just a crack. I take the time to check in on the boys, Mason first followed by Callum, both sound asleep.

As I walk back the stairs, I peer at the dozens of photos of the Landry's lining the stairwell and I have a thought. This would be very similar to what my life would look like if Jay had asked me to marry him that day, we'd just be a few years behind Emily and Jared. But the timelines do match up.

They got married two years after they graduated and if Jay was deployed for eighteen months after I graduated, we probably would have done something similar. We'd live here, I'm sure and we'd probably have a kid, maybe two.

I'd always been unsure of the idea, but he's wanted to be a father for as long as I've known him and I know that seeing how much he wanted them, I'd eventually come around to the idea.

Even without him, as I've been a teacher and being so close to Em's kids, I've warmed up to the idea of having my own. But it just seems to bizarre that if he would have asked me to marry him that day, I might have a three year old running around my house, maybe a little boy, with big blue eyes and freckles just like his dad.

There's so many ifs. So many what ifs and all the unanswered questions in the universe. The last six years of my life had the chance to be so drastically different if he had just told me. Would we still be together? Maybe. I would hope so. Now I'll never know, but what I do know is that I want to figure out where we stand, there's only one thing that I can do. I have to talk to Jay.


Jay POV

I groan as I hear my phone go off next to me. That can't be my alarm already. I grab my phone, it's not my alarm, Erin's name is splayed across the screen. I scramble to answer my phone as I switch on the lamp next to me. It's the middle of the night and I really don't know why she would be calling me, but I'm not going to question it. I've been waiting for this call for over a week. But she kept her promise. She called.

"Hey," I hear her raspy voice say on the other end of the line.

"Hey what's up?" I ask, my voice thick with sleep.

"Sorry, did I wake you up?" She asks concerned.

"Don't worry about it," I respond.

"I'm ready to talk, really talk. I made a reservation at the Purple Pig for tomorrow night at 7. You're buying," She says. I can only imagine the smirk on her face right now.

"Deal," I tell her without hesitation.

"Okay, I'll see you then,"


Not super confident in this chapter, but I hope you guys enjoyed it! As always, if you have any questions, please do not hesistate to leave them in a review or shoot me a PM. Please review!

-Addie