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THREE

A never-ending darkness

Is said to be spreading out, around.

Yet how dare you stop

And drop to your knees?

Do you not long to feel

The wind in your hair,

Hear the sound of the birds

Singing lullabies to help you sleep

Or the thrill one word can bring?

Do you not want a full life

Of joys and despairs and joys threefold?

We are the light to stop the madness

From seeping into our souls.

So as long as we are here

We shall fight!

To save our beautiful world.

Micha of Lirigon

CHAPTER THREE

Cadvan went to the bars as the two Bards were put in the cell with them. "It is good to know you are alive, but the situation is not quite how I imagined a joyful reunion of friends," he said, smiling without mirth.

Saliman stared at him. "I thought you were dead!" Saliman exclaimed.

"Well, as you can see, I'm not. I was trapped in a landslide, but I was not dead."

"But Maerad said you were dead!"

"She thought I was." Saliman embraced him briefly.

"This is grand news indeed," he said, smiling. "But I have some other news that is not so good. I am afraid we were tricked, but by whom I do not know,"

"Where's Maerad?" Hem asked. Cadvan sighed.

"She is unwell, and Sharma claims to have removed her magecraft. I believe he speaks truth and she has not woken for some time. Now that you are here, Saliman the healer, I wonder if you might give your opinion. I believe the spell might only be reversed by Sharma himself, but I want to know what you think."

"Hem is a healer, also," Saliman told him. "He has been learning the art well these last months." Cadvan gave Hem a brief smile. "How did Sharma do this?" Saliman asked, examining Maerad as best he could.

"He spoke some words," Cadvan replied, trying to remember what he had said. "It was…well, I'm not sure if I should say." he interrupted himself worriedly. "What if it makes it worse?"

"Was it in the Speech?" Saliman asked.

"Well, a twisted version of it."

"Then perhaps you could speak it in our language. If you can translate it. Did you understand what he said?"

"Ahh, yes; I did not think of that. Forgive me - I am tired, it has been a hard few days and I worry for Maerad. I think he said, literally; magery from Elednor take. And when I gathered my power, he just snatched it straight from me." Saliman frowned at him, looking disturbed.

"This is bad," he said, unnecessarily. "If Sharma can snatch our powers from us…" He didn't finish the sentence. He didn't have to.

Early the next morning, Dhalla came in with a full waterbag and a small loaf of bread.

"Ermm…" he began. "How is Maerad?" Cadvan's top lip seemed to twitch, but his face was composed so quickly that, had you seen it, you would have thought you had imagined it.

"Still alive, just about. No thanks to your Lord and Master."

Saliman and Cadvan both stared after the boy as he left. Hem was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall.

"Creep," he said, darkly. Saliman looked over at him, and managed to dredge up a small, lopsided smile from somewhere. The three sat in silence as they ate their meagre rations, saving some for Maerad despite the fact that, although none of them would admit it to each other, they didn't really expect her to wake. Not long after they had finished, Cadvan said, "Now it is time for you to tell me how they captured you. I have told you our tale; it is your turn." Saliman told him everything. He told him all about Hem's bravery and what he had done, how they had finally been reunited at Sjug'hakar Im, how they had been captured trying to get away.

"I think someone knew what we were doing and betrayed us," Saliman finished. Cadvan nodded.

"I believe that is what happened to us," he said. "Enkir didn't only know we would be in Pellinor, he knew which gate we would come out of."

"And so we have a traitor," Saliman said sadly. "I wonder who it is. And why."

"What's that?" Cadvan asked, squinting out of the window into the morning light. They all stared out the window.

"It's Irc!" Hem said suddenly. Saliman followed Hem as he rushed over to the window, picking him up so he could let Irc hop onto his hand. He spoke to the white crow briefly.

"He followed us," he said. "He was very scared, but he knew we were in trouble and wanted to help us. He could send a message, couldn't he, Saliman? He could bring help."

"We have no paper," Saliman replied, thoughtfully. "Could Irc remember what has happened to tell someone?" Hem had another short exchange with the bird, before rolling his eyes slightly.

"He says he is the Messenger of the King of the Birds, and will remember whatever you tell him."

"Tell him to find one of our friends and tell them that Hem, Maerad, Saliman and Cadvan are captured, Maerad is badly ill and we need help," Saliman told him. Hem relayed this information to Irc. After a moment, Hem turned to them all again and said quietly, "He says he found the tuning fork. He buried it safe. I'll tell him to give it to Silvia." He did so, and Irc ruffled his feathers in an important sort of way and flew off out of the window.

That night, Cadvan awoke in the small hours. He lay there thinking about Maerad's condition. What if…

He got up, walking over to where Hem slept. He watched him thrash and writhe in his sleep. The boy had grown a lot both physically and mentally since Cadvan and Maerad had found him in the Valverras, but in the vulnerability of sleep Cadvan still saw the same frightened little boy who had had to cuddle up to Maerad for a bit of comfort at night.

Cadvan wandered idly over to his friend, Saliman, who had stuck with him for all this time. You shouldn't be here, he thought to himself, then sighed; none of us should be here.

Finally, he turned to Maerad – who, he realised with a shock, was awake!

"Maerad!" he called, waking the others. He rushed over towards her. "Maerad, you're awake!" Hem and Saliman scrambled up and raced over to her as well.

Maerad stared at them in alarm for a few seconds, before recognition flowered in her eyes.

"How do you feel?" Saliman asked, as Cadvan gently took hold of her hand.

"Thirsty," she croaked. Hem ran to get the waterbag, and she drank, choking slightly.

"Enough?" Cadvan asked. She nodded wearily, her eyes closing. A few seconds later she was asleep again. Cadvan took the waterbag and placed it back in its corner.

"Curse him!" Cadvan suddenly burst out vehemently.

"Curse him double!" Saliman snarled.

"Curse him triple!" Hem added.

At length, Hem and Saliman settled back down for a few more hours of sleep, but Cadvan knelt next to Maerad, stroking her hair and thinking. He felt so guilty.

The next morning, Hem and Saliman found him asleep with his head on his arms, leaning on Maerad's bed. Cadvan was taken to see the Nameless One that same day.

The thing that had once been a man was wearing a black mask and floor length clothing so that not an inch of bare skin was exposed. So he was still vain.

He ordered Cadvan to tell him what he had done with the tuning fork, and warned that if he did not tell him he would make Maerad's condition even worse. He engaged Cadvan in such a desperate battle of wills that Cadvan was left gasping. Sharma then tried to scry Cadvan, against his will, but, somehow, Cadvan managed to resist. He had 24 hours, Sharma said, to make his decision.

"Then I will start to break bones. You will heal them, of course, but it will give you pain and it will weaken you to heal yourself so often. I'll hurt the boy too, shall I? Your choice. Tell me where it is before sunset tomorrow, or the boy's arms are broken. You will be watching, of course, so that you can blurt out where you have hidden it." He still sounded almost amused. "Last chance, then. Perhaps this will help you remember. Boy." Sharma gestured Dhalla over to Cadvan, and Dhalla cut Cadvan's little finger off in a quick movement. Cadvan stifled the shocked scream which was his instinct, and grabbed his finger, pushing down his horror and revulsion in his current dazed state of mind. He held his finger in its space and concentrated on knitting the skin back together, linking his blood vessels together and reattaching his muscles. He still had a dark scar running around the base of his finger, and blood covered his hands.

Cadvan was taken back to the cell after this, and he had a long discussion with Saliman. They couldn't give the fork back, they knew, nor could they allow him to torture Maerad any more. They would just have to hope that Irc could find some way to help, because neither had any idea what else they could do.


Those days were a living hell for Maerad. Sometimes she wasn't even sure if she were alive at all, thinking she might have gone beyond the Gates. She relived her killing of Ilar of Desor; that time when Burk had tried to rape her; saw her mother's dying face, scarred, glassy-eyed; the towers of Pellinor burning, burning; Enkir's spiteful, sneering face; the wight at the Broken Teeth; it was never-ending, always there, she could not escape.

It was like this for three whole days. At last, on the fourth day, she awoke for one short moment. Her friends were there. They were looking after her.

Another three days after this, she awoke again, and this time Hem was beside her, staring into space, while the other two ate and talked.

"Hem?" she whispered, making him jump, then call the others over.

"Maerad," Saliman said urgently. "Can you stay awake for a few minutes? We want to try something." Maerad nodded. "Good," Saliman continued. "Now, Cadvan told me all about you becoming a wolf. If you do that now, you should be able to leave this sickness behind. Will you try it?" Maerad nodded, then sank through the layers of who she was, searching for the turning point, but before she was halfway there a black shadow seemed to grip her and pull her up. She was filled with raw terror, and she came back, gasping.

"I can't," she whispered, tears filling her eyes. Hem hugged her arm, looking helpless.

"It's okay, Maerad, it's okay," Cadvan soothed, brushing away her tears.

"We do have another idea," Saliman said.

"That probably won't work," Cadvan finished. Had Maerad been well, she would have seen that the exchange had the air of an old argument. Saliman sighed.

"We have to try," he said. "Shall I do it?" he asked Cadvan. "Or will you?"

"You try," Cadvan replied. At this, Saliman nodded, and turned to Maerad. "Now, I'm going to sort of scry you, but I'm going to try and change you into the wolf. Okay? You have to let me in, and show me which is the wolf part of you. Can you do that?" Maerad nodded, and they helped her to sit up so she was square with Saliman. He looked straight into her eyes, and tried to search for the part of Maerad which was wolf. But he couldn't get there. He could feel where it was, as Maerad was showing him, but he couldn't get there to drag it to the surface. Something was stopping him. Maerad suddenly tensed in pain, and Saliman withdrew hastily.

"I can't do it," he said, his voice fading into the background as Maerad's nightmares overwhelmed her.