Chapter 3: Omfg its Bigfoot!


I was silently driving down a dirt road that would eventually lead to my house.

By now it was pitch blank, stars littered the sky which gave it a sort of serene look. This was one of the things that made me fall head over heels in love with this place. In the city the sky never got this bright. Just in the distance the moon made its beauty know as it mysteriously hung in the distance.

I groaned and blinked once.

I slowly reached my right hand off the steering wheel and turned on the radio. The car was immediately filled with the sound of music which made me forget about all my problems, surroundings, life, and the fact that I was now swerving a little.


I tapped the steering wheel with my finger to the beat of the song. I sung happily and did a little twirl of my finger when the song ended.

I sighed with a huge grin on my face and closed my eyes for a brief second...thank god I live out in the middle of nowhere, because my singing is horrible and I probably looked really retarded.

I lazily open my eyes…wait is that a guy standing in the road…Oh shit!

My eyes shot open and I slammed on the brakes making my head shoot forward. My head hit the steering wheel making it bounce off like a basketball. The tires angrily screeched to an abrupt stop and I took a moment to analyze the situation with a few bright, encouraging words.

"Damn…mother…fucker," I heard myself mutter while slowly picking myself up.

I quickly recoiled putting a hand to now throbbing forehead. I flinched at the pain I now all of a sudden felt; honestly this felt like the worse hang over of all time.

Almost forgetting about the man I almost ran over I dumbly say "hkjabak…" as I slowly peeked over my dash board scared that I will see a guy sliced in half with half his body under my tire and the other thrown carelessly down the road.

I stared at the man now visible in the view of my head lights. For a minute I almost forgot how to breathe when I saw the guy lying motionlessly on the ground. I jerked open my door and jogged over to the man; now that I was closer to him I got to properly see what type of position he was actually in. It seemed he was now on the ground in a fetal position with his head ducked, his hands protectively over his head with his knees tightly pulled to his chest.

"Oh my god, sir are you alright." I slurred out.

I gently placed a hand on his shoulder and he quickly looked up with frighten eyes. Almost immediately the fear in his eyes was replaced with anger and he quickly stood up to his full height…he was really short…maybe 5"5. I bit my bottom lip trying not to laugh that not only was I not taking his stern look serious but also how I was now looking down on him. I mean I know I'm a tall chick and all but damn.

"Watch where you're going bitch!" The man spat. He stomped pass me grumbling more insults my way.

I frowned, taken aback by his blunt choice of words. It took me a few seconds to relies that what the guy said to me was what he actually said but once I did I felt a new wave of anger wash over me like a disease. Ok, first of all you absolutely do not insult a woman that is big enough to kick your ass. Secondly, did he even see the more than real pistol secured to my waist?

I swiveled around in a flash. I opened my mouth ready to make an awesome comeback but when I did nothing came out. I growled and I loudly made my way back to my car. I plopped in the seat and watched the man's retreating back through my side view mirror.

I looked down at my stick shift…It isn't to late…I could put this baby and reverse and run the son of gun over and drive away triumphantly, but once again the better side of me, If any, held me back from my evil side's intentions.

I sighed completely defeated and exhausted.

"I'm too tired to deal with assholes right now," I told myself hoping that that would help my now bruised ego.

I closed the door making one last glance at my side view mirror. I watched him make his way off the rood and disappear into the dark forest. I rolled door the window and stuck out my middle finger just wishing he would have seen that and drove away into the night.

"I hope you die," I muttered under my breath as I griped the steering wheel tighter.

Usually I don't make such requests but how could you blame me. All I could say is careful what you wish for.


I closed the door to my truck and lightly jingled the set of keys in my hands. I bit my bottom lip and nervously looked around. I'm not sure what it was but I just felt like one big pair of eyes was boring down into the very being of my soul. It was like that feeling it got back in the forest when I was looking for that kid.

I shuddered and looked at my house wearily. I sifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other.

Ok, why am I just standing here when my house is literally in spitting distance? It's a good thing I don't have neighbors or they probably would have thought I was beyond weird by now.

I quickly walked up the dirt path that I suppose served as my drive way and came to the wooden steps adored with a stunning front deck. I didn't take time to marvel at how lucky I was to have this house but instead I swiftly walked up the eight steps skipping a couple in my urgency. I blindly reach an arm forward wiggling my fingers until I touched the front of my door. I made a sound that only could be described in words. Thank god.

I lifted my other hand that had the key squinting my eyes trying to figure out which one was for the door when I heard a rustle of leaves.

I made a very unappealing squeal as I quickly looked over my shoulder trying to find the cause of my distress. Even if the moon gave just enough light to see I still panicked as my grip on the keys tightened. I turned my attention back to the keys in my hand, damn why do I have so many keys, I thought now starting to panic.

I was now shaking desperately trying to find the right one, finally after flipping from key to key I found the key and held it securely with both hands. I reached forward trying to find the lock, after many attempts to push the key in the lock I finally growled out in frustration putting a hand to my temples trying to calm myself down.

After a second of doing this I wondered if I just left my T.V. on animal planet or something. Yeah animal planet…that's what it was, I thought, trying desperately to reassure myself. I made side glance over to the window but could not see any lights that would indicant that my T.V. was on. I jumped when I heard a low growl that sounded all too real to be just T.V.

I dropped the keys and made a sound that sounded like half a laugh and half a cry.

"Aw come on!" I cried out.

I dropped to my knees scrambling to find the keys trying to ignore the sounds of basically a freaking jungle be hide me. When my hands hit the cold metal I grabbed it quickly and jumped to my feet. I bet who ever up there that was doing this to me was getting a good laugh out of watching me basically have a stroke but I think they finally had enough because the first key I grabbed was the key for the door and thank the heavens I managed to get the key in the lock on my first try. I opened the door with haste closing it quickly without looking back. I locked all the appropriate locks to the door and took a couple steps back.

I stood there in silence till finally I had enough courage to walk over to the window. I gently slid a knee on the couch that was up against the window and slightly moved the curtain and peeked out.

I looked closely to see if any bushes moved or if I could hear that growl that sounded like it belonged in some sci-fi movie…something that proved I wasn't crazy but I neither saw nor heard anything.

I sighed.

"I'm going completely crazy," I said while shaking my head.

At that moment I heard a loud thump which once again made me jump. I turned around straining my eyes trying to see into the dark confines of my house. A intruder, I thought.

"This is definitely not my lucky day." I muttered.

I slowly brought my hand up to my chest trying to calm my already loud heart, there are only so many surprises and scares a person can take in a day and I know I was pushing that limit. I heard the loud thump again and I realized that it was coming from up stairs. I took out my pistol, which I'm really glad I still have in my possession and made my way over to the stairs. I slowly started to make my way up. Now, if only I can be quiet I might have-

CREAK!

Damn I totally forgot about that stupid stair. Well there goes my element of surprise. Ok plan B, find person, aim wildly.

I quickly ran up the stairs and came to the hallway. I looked to my left and right, which way. I heard the thump again and I turned my head to the left. They were in the room down the hall from my bedroom which I now labeled as my storage room. I slowly tip toed down the hall also noting that the door was slightly open already. With the tip of my gun I pushed the door open keeping a train eye on any movement that might be lurking in the shadows. Now that the door was fully open my eyes slowly looked from left to right, my gun held up with both hands. I cautiously took one step after the other into the somewhat lit room. There was a window on the other side of the room, the moons light soaked its why into the shape of the window giving me just enough light. I slowly lowered my gun but only a little as I stood a little straighter.

I know I wasn't imagining those noises, even on the floor there were a few trinkets carelessly lying there, among those objects was my old police badge as it seemed to glow against the moons gleaming rays. I wrinkled my nose and turned to leave when I all of a sudden saw a flicker of movement in the shadows. My eyes shoot open as I lifted my gun; unfortunately I was not prepared at what speed it had as it latched on to my face. I screamed a muffled scream, my hand somehow losing its grip on my only protection. I stumbled back running into boxes and knocking over a stack of DVD's. Finally somewhat finding my balance I lifted my hands up getting a good grip and in one fluid motion I pried it off. I yelped when one of its claws lightly scratched my face as I did so.

I held whatever it was firmly as I walked into the moons light to get a better view at my intruder.

"Meowwwmm..."

I looked at my attacker and felt a huge grin tug at the ends of my lip. "Nala," I muttered in disbelief. She grumbled and smirked her cat like smirk in response to her name and I lightly chuckled.

"You know you scared the crap out of me right, and hell, you could have been a very dead kitty if I shot you, did you know that?" I said to her.

She closed her eyes and started to purr completely unaware that she just narrowly avoided death itself.

I smiled and nervously laughed still not yet over all the weird crap I went through today. Out of nowhere Nala's purring abruptly ceased and her eyes shot open. Her smirk disappeared as she seemed to have noticed something. She started to wiggle and claw at my hands desperately wanting to be released. I dropped her and she landed on her back with a loud thud. Ha, who ever said cats land on their feet. She regained her footing and quickly walked to the door whishing the tip of her tail back and forth; she stopped and looked back at me.

"Hey what's up with you, have you all of a sudden turned bi-polar without telling me?" I said with my voice in a type of questioning tone.

I started to walk forward but quickly stopped when she hissed at me. With that she scurried down the hall and quickly disappeared down the stairs.

I gritted my teeth, "Well fine be like that, but just remember who feeds you," I yelled after her.

I crossed my arms over my chest. I turned around and walked over to the other side of the room making sure not to step on anything. Man the room was wreaked!

"Now where is that gun," I muttered while furrowing my brows.

I'm not sure what made me look out the window at that moment but I just did. I froze not daring to move a muscle, my eyes went huge and my mouth seemed to slightly open without my doing. My only thought at the moment…WTF!

Outside in my front yard was a…tall, dark, muscular figure. It was just standing there in the middle of my lawn as it looked directly at me…of shit. Even with the light of the moon it did not help very much. I slightly lean my head forward. Whatever it was it was huge and for the first time in my life made me just a little intimidated.

What a normal person probably would have done at this very moment:

-Scream their head off while slowly backing up
-Trip over crap in their panic state
-Clumsily get up and blindly run the opposite direction
-Accidentally run into the wall
-Blank out
-Wake up the next morning wondering what the hell happened
-Remembered what happened
-Will not tell anyone so no one would think their crazy
-Finally, they would live the rest of their miserable lives in fear

But of course let's get something straight; I'm nowhere near normal.

I stood there in awe and said those three words that not everyone gets to say very often.

"Omfg…it's Bigfoot!" I screeched excitedly putting a hand over my mouth.

My face was something that could only be described with symbols. :D

I turned on my heels gracefully jumping over the objects still sprawled out on the floor and ran across the hall and bum rushed my door quickly turning on the lights. I frantically looked from left to right trying to find the object I so desperately needed. I ran over to my bed sending pillows and covers in all directions. Not there. I dropped to my knees making a quick glance under my bed. Not there.

Dammit! One of the world's greatest marvels came to my house, my house, and is literally out there gracing my property with its greatness and I can't find my stupid camera!

I crawled over to my closet and opened the door. I sat there on my knees in bewilderment as I looked down at the most beautiful and meaningful object in my life right about now. I gingerly picked it up with both hands and held it close to my chest. I looked up, "thank you," I whispered to whoever was listening.

I got back to my feet and ran out the room not bothering to turn off the lights. I was across the hall and in my storage room in record time. I once again scrambled to get over all the crap on the floor and with one huge more than excited expression (:D) I approached the window holding up the camera to my eye ready to take the picture that would probably be considered more than my life…and some.

.

.

.

My happy expression slowly faded away as I lowered my camera. I blinked a few times making sure my mind wasn't playing tricks on my conscious. Nope, I was most definitely seeing correctly. Ok I know I'm not crazy…I know I saw a very real lively breathing creature standing there…but now there was nothing but nothingness. I felt my bottom lip punker up into one of my famous sad faces. I groaned and taped my foot on the wooden floors. Did I really just miss a one in a life time shot at getting the oh so mysterious Bigfoot? I mentally questioned myself. I angrily threw down the camera not really caring if I just ruined it and walked out of the room and down the stairs.

CREAK!

"Oh shut up!" I yelled at the annoying stair.

I blindly walked across the living room and tripped over something making me hit the floor with a loud boom. I quickly regained my composure and crawled away patting the wall for the light switch. After a few seconds of nothing but darkness and the patting of my hands on the wall I somehow turned it on and looked over my shoulder at the ball of orange fur lying on the floor. It's tailed uncurled, swished around a few times and it lifted its head and turned around to reveal a very smirking Nala. The look she gave me had 'idiot, your such a freaking klutz' written all over it.

I couldn't help but immediately forget about what I was mad about. I allowed myself to relax and lean against the cool wall.

I chuckled heartedly.

"Nala, you're going to be the death of me if I don't start paying attention." I said grinning like an idiot.

Nala got out of her sitting position and stretched an arm and leg at the same time. She looked at me and cocked her head cutely to the side letting her eyes wonder off as if she was considering my statement. She looked back at me with such intriguing eyes and closed the distance between us. She rubbed herself against my leg and sat down waiting for a response out of me. I wrapped both my arms around my legs and leaned my head against the wall.

"Nala I know I saw something out there." I said bleakly.

I looked down at her form. She continued to stare at me…probably wondering why I was babbling on about my shitfull life and not feeding her. I smiled and used the wall for support to help myself up. I slowly walk into the kitchen with Nala at my heel purring and meowing at me the whole way to her little food cabinet. I picked her small bowl off the floor and placed it on the counter. I reached my hand out and grabbed a can of cat food and opened it with ease. I turned the can upside down shaking it a bit until the food slowly but surely came out and made a plopping sound as it landed in the bowl.

I looked down at Nala who sat there staring up at the bowl of food with greedy eyes.

"I don't see how you like this crap," I muttered.

I placed the crud A.K.A cat food on the floor and Nala pounced like a wild animal and neatly gobbled it down.

I leaned against the counter staring into space not quite sure what I should do next. My eyes slowly scanned the kitchen and it happened to fall on a certain cabinet. My snacks…no wonder, I haven't eaten anything sense this morning.

I pushed myself off the counter and made my way over to my stash. I opened the cabinet and stood there for a minute not quite sure what to eat. My eyes somehow found the king sized Hershey bar and I quickly grabbed it and peeled off the rapper to reveal one of gods greatest creations; chocolate. Almost everyone likes chocolate, especially me. Trust me, one way to earn my trust is to offer me chocolate and in a matter of seconds I would not only be your closes friend but I would get down on both knees, bow to you and call you master for the rest of your life…and no I am not over exaggerating that either.

Just before I was about to take my first bite an idea struck. If chocolate is the best thing that mankind has ever had the brain cells to create, heck to me is considered a peace offering than why won't tall, dark, and mysterious love it as well.

"Hell it's worth a shot," I said with new hope brewing its why back into my soul.

I looked over at Nala hoping for a little extra reassurance, you know that pat on the back or that little twinkle in the eye that pretty much gave off a 'You can do it' or 'follow your heart' kind of vibe. Yet of course she was still too preoccupied with her food to even notice my obvious intentions. Whatever. I walked out the kitchen and into the living room, I stopped a couple feet away from the front door that would eventually lead to a world that I now had no doubt was full of unknown phenomenon's that some people nowadays are too hard headed to recognize.

I took those last two steps that would probably change my life forever as I reached for the door knob. I cupped the knob and with my other hand unlatched all the locks. I opened the door just enough to peek my head through. I quickly flicked on the light to the front deck and looked at the bushes and trees. After several minutes of doing nothing I finally balled up just enough courage and slowly poked the rest of my body out the door and stood there dumbly looking around for something that would only appear in a little kids nightmares...Or in my case my wildest dreams.

I awkwardly side stepped it down my stairs and placed my offering on the bottom step.

I quickly turned around ready to get back to the safety of my house but stopped and risked one last glance back to the forest that perhaps held more secrets than it at first let on. I turned around and loudly pounded my way up the stairs. I closed the door and locked it back up. I smiled.

"Now where are those binoculars," I said already looking around for them.

Ha, please don't ask why I own a pair of binoculars. I found the binoculars and plopped down on the couch against the window and peeked out. Through the lenses I looked at the Hershey bar laying on the bottom step and I slowly looked up to the beginning of the forest.

"I'm going to catch a Bigfoot, I can't believe this," I said eagerly.

I heard a soft thud somewhere to my right and I lowered the binoculars to see Nala sitting there on the arm of the couch.

"Hey buddy, you going to help me catch Bigfoot?"

She looked at me for a second then jumped off the couch and walked away.

"Well fine! When I catch Bigfoot I won't include you in the glory that is sure to come!" I yelled after her retreating form.

I turned back to the window putting the binoculars back to my eyes.

"Tonight…Zoey Monroe will catch Bigfoot and nothing is going to stop me," I confidently said.


Re-edit: 12/7/10