"You look beautiful"

Molly Weasley steps behind me, her reflection appearing in the long mirror.

I muster a small smile and try not to look at the tear rolling down her cheek.

I look at myself

Molly has done a fantastic job of course, my hair and makeup are absolutely perfect.

However it's not as if the effort is going to be appreciated by my soon to be husband.

A wave of nausea runs through me.

Don't think about it.

Don't.

But it's hard not to as I'm standing here on my wedding day.

I run my hands down my elegant white dress, admiring the way it comes out ever so slightly on the waist.

My long auburn hair clipped up at the back, a veil dangles freely, shimmering every time I turn my head.

A sigh escape my lips.

"Lore" Hermione says softly, coming over to engulf me in a hug.

I hold back the tears threatening to escape from eyes.

A knock on the door interrupts us

"We're ready for you" Charlie Weasley calls from behind the door.

I feel the dread wash over me and my knees buckle as I try to move.

I grab hold of Hermione's arm

"I can't do this" Panic rife in my voice

Hermione cocks her head to the side in sympathy.

"You'll be fine, just remember we are always here for you. We're not going anywhere" she tries to reassure me.

She leads me to the door, I feel like I'm going to faint.

Molly stops us and gives me a huge hug.

She mumbles something into my neck, and all I can do is pat her back gingerly.

"Thanks Mrs Weasley"

She pulls back and sniffs

"You will be amazing" she tries a brave smile.

I nod slightly, as Hermione opens the door and we step out onto the landing.

Here it goes.

The last steps of my freedom, I think bitterly.

Every step takes so much effort but somehow I make it to the garden.

The knot in my stomach tightens as I take in all the guests.

We stand by a beautiful white archway, lilac coloured flowers entwined throughout.

I look down the aisle, and see Snape standing there, his back to me thankfully.

Oh fuck

I really can't do this

I look behind me, maybe I could make a run for it?

Start a new life

Renounce my magic.

Sure it would be hard but it would be worth it, if it meant I never had to see this man again in my life.

Right?

I step backwards, which is quite difficult when you have an extremely long dress on.

I eye up the exists around me

All I would have to do is jump over the fence.

Or maybe leaving through the front door would be easier, although that would slow me down giving Snape time to catch up with me.

I'm knocked out of my thoughts of escaping when Arthur Weasley takes hold of my upper arm

He smiles down at me

"Ready?"

I gulp

How could I ever be ready for this?

I look back over at the fence longingly

It's now or never

Alas it's too late

The procession starts playing and all heads, except one turn to look at me

No escape now is all I can think as Arthur walks me down the aisle.

Purple and pink petals are scattered on the aisle floor.

So pretty.

Yet this wedding will be so ugly.

My legs buckle again as we get closer to Snape.

I notice that he is wearing a traditional black suit, his long greasy hair dangling round his face as usual.

Why didn't I pretend to be ill?

Then this could have been delayed and I could have escaped when people least expected it.

I know I can't turn and run now but it doesn't stop me looking over my shoulder wishfully.

I ignore the sea of faces staring at me.

If I took notice of them, I think I would be sick.

We reach the small alter where a wizard stands wearing very pristine robes.

Arthur Weasley kisses me on the cheek and pats my arm.

Fuck

I send a silent prayer to whatever God is up there, to make something happen.

Anything to stop this.

Please.

I bite the inside of my cheek to stop the tears welling up.

Not tears of happiness of course.

I turn to look at Snape, dread seeping through my veins.

How I haven't passed out yet I do not know.

He turns to look at me and our eyes meet.

There is so much coldness in them, such hatred.

As usual he regards me with a snarl, looking like his is in pain.

I can't do anything, I can barely breathe.

Luckily he breaks eye contact first, turning to the wizard before us.

"We are gathered here today to witness the joining of two families, Severus Snape and Lorelei Winters".

The wizard drones on and I feel barely able to listen to him.

What would my mother say if she could see me now?

Most likely be happy

Ending up with someone so cold and cruel.

"Severus and Lorelei please join hands" the wizard instructs us

I flinch as Snape takes my left hand in his cool, long fingers.

"Do you Severus Snape take thee Lorelei Winters to be your lawfully wedded wife? To love and to cherish? To comfort her -"

I block out the words

I don't want to be here

I can't go through with this

I close my eyes but they fling open as a sharp pain shoots through my hand.

The bastard is digging his nails into me.

His face glaring at me

"I do"

I swallow the lump in my throat as the wizard turns to me, repeating the same vowels.

Staring at the man in front of me, the man about to become my husband, I feel nothing but hatred for him.

I study his face and see that he is just standing there looking entirely bored by the whole thing.

Does he seriously think I want to marry him?

God I hope not.

I feel the sharp sensation in my hand again as I realise that no-one is speaking.

Someone from the guests gives an awkward cough.

Snape is looking at me, one eyebrow perfectly raised.

I realise it's time for me to say the two dreaded words.

The two words that will bind us together.

My heart feels in my throat as I shakily say "I do".

I watch in amazement as gold light wraps around our hands, a warm sweet sensation sweeps through me.

I guess this is it.

I feel a ring being forced down my finger.

I open my mouth to complain but the furious look from Snape quenches my speech.

I summon my inner strength and take the ring offered to me by the wizard, and ram it down Snape's own finger.

A small bit of satisfaction seeps through me as I see Snape's face twitch in discomfort.

"You may now kiss the bride"

My heart freezes

I briefly forgot that this is the final bit.

Now I'm definitely going to be sick

Snape steps closer to me

Oh god.

I force myself to look up at him, horrified at what is to happen.

He swoops down and I instinctively lean backwards.

"What are you doing?" He hisses, grabbing hold of my shoulders pulling me towards him.

I whimper and he just snarls at me before closing the gap between my mouth and his.

His dry lips brush against mine in one agonising moment.

Thankfully he pulls away almost as soon as his lips touched mine.

I swallow the bile that has risen in my throat.

Our guests start clapping and I feel the garden start to spin.

The last thing I see is Snape scowling at me before everything goes dark.


"Lore" I feel someone shaking me gently.

"Can she hear you?" someone's voice asks

I open my eyes, blurred out faces are dotted in front of me.

"Lore!" a voice to my left calls out.

I blink, and everything starts to come into focus.

"What happened?" I ask, my voice hoarse.

"Shh sweetie just relax" Molly Weasley's voice travels down from above me.

I feel a damp cloth on my forehead and start to panic.

"What's going on?"

Alarmed I force myself to sit up

"You shouldn't move" Hermione's disapproving voice hits me and I focus on her face.

"Just tell me" my voices rises slightly.

I see the others exchange glances

"What?" I snap

Then it all comes back to me, the wedding, the kiss, the fact I'm now professor Snape's wife.

"Oh Merlin"

I lie back down and squeeze my eyes shut, not wanting to face reality.

"How are you feeling?" Molly's voice is full of concern.

I groan

"My head hurts" I complain, keeping my eyes shut.

"Do you think we should go and get Sn-" Hermione starts to whisper

"NO" My eyes fly open and I struggle to sit back up "Please not him" I plead.

"Shh dear and lie back down" Molly gently pushes me back down on the bed "There. You shouldn't worry professor Snape will be able to help you, I'm sure he knows what to give you to relieve the pain".

I sob but all that earns me is a reassuring stroke on my hair.

I don't want that man coming anywhere near me but there is nothing I can do.

Hermione rushes off to go and fetch my darling husband.

I feel my stomach lurch.

At least I won't be alone with him, I have Ron, Harry, Molly and Hermione when she gets back.

I breathe out slowly

A tiny sigh of relief.

Moments later I here quick footsteps approach, a shadowing falling over me.

"What is wrong with her?" The drawl of professor Snape pierces through my ears.

"I don't know Severus, after she fainted we brought her up here where she's complaining of headaches, she doesn't look herself" Molly voice is full of worry.

I flinch as cold fingers replace the damp cloth on my forehead.

"A slight temperature, nothing serious, most likely caused by stress"

You've got that fucking right, I can't help but think.

"She is fine" Snape concludes, whipping his fingers away from me.

"Thank you Severus"

Molly places the damp cloth back in its former position.

"She is perfectly fine to come downstairs, I believe professor Dumbledore is ready to start the toast" He sneers at the last bit as if a toast would cause him great pain.

I groan again, hoping that I will be allowed to stay up here safe and sound.

No such luck.

"Come on Lorelei, you heard what pro-, er, Sev-"

"Professor Snape" Snape interrupts

Molly looks flustered "Right, yes. You heard what professor Snape said, you've got to go downstairs now, they're all waiting for you".

I clench my fists, grinding my teeth.

"Fine" I snap and try not to look at the hurt in Molly's eyes.

I'm not mad at her, I just want the world to go away right now.

I sit back up, the room spinning ever so slightly.

Hermione offers me her hand and gently pulls me to my feet.

I look round the room and happily see that Snape has buggered off.

"Do I have to do this?" I groan, dragging my feet as I walk towards the door.

"Yes" is all Molly replies before gently pushing me out of the door.

I walk downstairs slowly, trying to delay the inevitable, the moment when all faces turn to me, sadness masked by false smiles.

I catch Lupin's eye as I walk into the room and head towards him, my path is soon blocked however by the appearance of Snape.

I glare at him, trying to move past him but he grabs me by the upper arm

"Your presence is required at the front of the room" He hisses in my ear before dragging me off to stand next to Dumbledore.

Lupin gives me a half smile before he disappears from my view.

Dumbledore beckons me closer, ignoring the fact that Snape has a vice grip on my arm.

"Get off me" I wrench my arm away from him and hurry to Dumbledore before Snape retaliates.

"Ah Lorelei dear, we were growing quite concerned" he looks at me and I have a funny sensation that I'm being x-rayed.

A shiver goes down my spine and I break eye contact.

"Not to worry, you are here now. Severus stop skulking and come closer to Mis-sorry Mrs Snape"

For the hundredth time today I feel the urge to throw up.

I try not to look terrified as Snape stands closer to me

Thankfully he makes no attempts to touch me as Dumbledore begins his toast.

He wishes us happiness and good health.

I attempt to put a smile on my face but it probably looks more like a grimace.

I daren't even look at Snape.

No doubt he is shooting everyone death glares.

I don't even look into the sea of faces, just stare down at my feet.

I can't wait to get divorced, floats into my mind.

I wonder how many brides think that about an hour into their marriage.

When the toast is finished Dumbledore leans over and gives me a small kiss on the cheek.

I feel like crying.

However when Dumbledore asks if Snape would like to give a speech, I can't help but snigger at the horrified look on his face.

My laughter is short lived when Snape turns on me, a snarl forming on his lips.

I make my excuses and go find Harry, Ron and Hermione.

They all hug me and compliment me but I just roll my eyes.

"Seriously?" I complain

Ron smirks at me, "How does it feel to be married to the dungeons bat?"

I look at him.

Harry and Hermione are stunned.

A strange sensation ripples through me and I realise I'm laughing.

Typical Ron

He always has such great tact.

"Detention for you Weasley" I mimic Snape, causing Harry to snort with laughter.

It feels good to be able to joke with my friends, not having to worry about anything.

But everything has changed now hasn't it?

I grit my teeth and ignore the voice inside my head.

My friends are here for me no matter what.

All I have to do is get through the last two years of my education and then I'm free to divorce him.

Yes.

I probably won't even notice that I'm married, after all it's not as if Dumbledore is going to make me leave Gryffindor and shack up with Snape.

I shudder at the thought.

I focus back on the conversation to find Hermione berating Ron and Harry on ways they have found to cheat their future N.E.W.T exams.

"But George swore by it" Ron protests

"Seriously Ronald how can you expect to do anything with your life if you're content with cheating?" Hermione scowls

Harry grimaces and gives Ron a nudge

"I wouldn't say anything more mate if I were you" He says under his breath, just loud enough for me and Hermione to catch what he said.

"I'm surprised at you Harry, wanting to take the easy route" Hermione shakes her head in disappointment.

"Come on Hermione do you have any idea how hard N.E.W.T level Transfiguration is?" Ron groans

"It wouldn't be so hard if you two actually paid attention in class" Hermione snaps.

"Blimey" Ron mutters, rolling his eyes.

Hermione glares at him before turning to me

"Do you feel ready to start your first N.E.W.T level year?" she asks

Classic Hermione, too busy fussing about exams to focus on the reality of what's going on around her.

"Sure" I say with an unconvincing grin.

"Wait till you start trying to make a Shrinking Solution in potions, then you'll see how crap these exams are" Harry shrugs

"Maybe Snape will pass you just fo-" Ron starts before Hermione grabs him by the shoulder in warning.

"I will pass Miss Winters just for doing what exactly?"

I jump, startled once again by Snape's sudden appearance.

Ron starts spluttering, the tips of his ears going red.

"Well - I-Just-I-" Ron pauses, looking horrified.

"Go on" Snape snarls

"N-nothing" Ron stutters

Oh fuck.

"Nothing sir" Snape hisses, leaning down to Ron so that they are eye level.

"Nothingsir" Ron mumbles quickly, not wanting to be cornered by Snape.

Raising an eyebrow at Ron, Snape turns to me

"I think it was time we were going now"

Huh?

I stare at him blankly

Going?

"What do you mean?"

Snape looks exasperated like I'm the most slowest person in the world.

"To m-" He stops, a pained expression crosses his face "our house".

I carry on starring at him.

Why would I want to go to his house?

Seriously?

I thought this marriage was just for show?

"I'm not going anywhere with you" I spit, moving away from him.

"Do I really need to explain the ins and outs of marriage for you?" He hisses.

What the fuck?

"I'm sorry bu-"

"In order for this marriage to be fulfilled it needs to be consummated, now would you rather I take you some place quiet or should we just go for it in the garden?" He interrupts, his voice low and deadly.

I blink in horror, my heart sinking.

He can't possibly mean?

But he does

He grabs my upper arm again

"Say goodbye to your friends. I want to get this over and done with"

I look at Harry, Ron and Hermione.

None of them can really look me in the eye.

Oh god.

"I've got to go" I whisper, my voice not wanting to be heard.

Before they get a chance to reply I'm being marched to the front door of the Burrow.

"Leave me alone" I plead

Ignoring me he opens the front door and shoves me out of it.

"Please"

He takes hold of my arm again, dragging me down the garden path.

Tears start to roll down my cheeks and I hate myself for it.

I hate myself for being so fucking weak.

We reach the end of the path and go through the gate.

"Just let m-"

But I don't get to finish my sentence as I'm suddenly compressed, and find it hard to breathe.

Then everything goes still.

I start to shiver at the temperature drop.

In front of me stands a dingy little house.

The front door painted dark green.

Dead flowers stand in pots that look as if they died centuries ago.

"Home sweet home" Snape whispers sarcastically in my ear.