AN: Thanks to anyone who read my first chapter. I know that this whole song thing is getting kinda annoying, because it is annoying me too, but I promise that the chapter after this one is the last one with loads of songs in... after that its all just pure story. I just think that having songs at the start shows all the array of things bella was feeling throughout her life, and is the easiest way of quickly establishing it!

Thanks to everyone who reviewed and favourited either the story or me :) I am really grateful, I'm sorry for this chapter, I'm not too pleased with it, but I'm focusing on the next chapter which will be in EDWARDS POV!!


Chapter 2

Bella's Point Of View

'Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness.' ~ Maya Angelou, Gather Together in My Name

"Thanks for all that applause but I'm sorry, now we get to more of the depressing stuff. This is all the stuff I wrote when my soul mate left me. Let me explain something about this time..." The audience went silent as I sifted through my memories for a way to explain him to the people. It hurt like hell to think of him again but it needed to be done, "Basically, he left me. Alone, in the woods, that was my first near death experience, if I wasn't found by my best friend Jake I'd be dead by now, but we'll come back to Jake later. I was left completely on my own for months, I felt isolated, unprotected, but never angry or bitter, I loved him too much to ever be angry about him leaving. I had never felt so unloved... this song is called My Happy Ending"

(My happy ending by Avril Lavigne)

So much for my happy ending
Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh...
[Chorus:]
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
And all of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh...
[Chorus][Chorus x2][x2]
Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh...
So much for my happy ending

Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something you said?
Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

You've got your dumb friends
I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they
But they don't know me
Do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do
All the stuff that you do

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh...

"Heartbroken was an understatement and I just didn't understand what had happened between us, it all happened so fast!" It was true,I never understood. To this day I still don't understand why he just strung me along. I guess I was just some sort of play thing to him, not nerly good enough to deserve him. But of course, I knew that from the beginning... in a way I just set myself up for this pain.

(Don't forget by Demi Lovato)

Did you forget
That I was even alive
Did you forget
Everything we ever had
Did you forget
Did you forget
About me

Did you regret
Ever standing by my side
Did you forget
What we were feeling inside
Now I'm left to forget
About us

But somewhere we went wrong
We were once so strong
Our love is like a song
You can't forget it

So now I guess
This is where we have to stand
Did you regret
Ever holding my hand
Never again
Please don't forget
Don't forget

We had it all
We were just about to fall
Even more in love
Than we were before
I won't forget
I won't forget
About us

But somewhere we went wrong
We were once so strong
Our love is like a song
You can't forget it

Somewhere we went wrong
We were once so strong
Our love is like a song
You can't forget it
At all

And at last
All the pictures have been burned
And all the past
Is just a lesson that we've learned
I won't forget
I won't forget us

But somewhere we went wrong
Our love is like a song
But you won't sing along
You've forgotten
About us

"I just felt so empty and not present in my own life, he had taken it with him unknowingly..." He was my life.

(Nobody's home by Avril Lavigne)

Well, I couldn't tell you
Why she felt that way? She felt it every day
And I couldn't help her
I just watched her make the same mistakes again

What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems
Don't know where she belongs
Where she belongs?

She wants to go home but nobody's home
That's where she lies
Broken inside with no place to go
No place to go to dry her eyes
Broken inside

Open your eyes
And look outside find the reasons why
You've been rejected
And now you can't find what you've left behind

Be strong, be strong now
Too many, too many problems
Don't know where she belongs
Where she belongs?

She wants to go home but nobody's home
That's where she lies
Broken inside with no place to go
No place to go to dry her eyes
Broken inside

Her feelings she hides, her dreams she can't find
She's losing her mind, she's fallen behind
And she can't find her place, she's losing her faith
She's fallen from grace, she's all over the place, yeah

She wants to go home but nobody's home
That's where she lies
Broken inside with no place to go
No place to go to dry her eyes
Broken inside

She's lost inside, lost inside
She's lost inside, lost inside

After this song I looked out into the audience and saw many women crying into each other's arms, I felt touched that they were able to understand the feeling behind the songs, the intensity. I carried on down the front row to see my best friend, Jacob, sat staring at me, a sad smile on his face. I offered him a small smile and a wave. "Well then people, you've managed to listen to my whining songs for long enough haven't you? I can see some people crying, thank you so much, you understand the intensity of the emotion behind the song. That was always my aim... but now, let's move on to some happier songs. But first, I'd like to introduce you all to someone..." I looked at Jake and winked, he stared on back slightly startled, realising what was coming up. "Throughout my depression, there was another thing apart from the songs that helped me make it through... my best friend, without him," I shook my head to clear the tears that were prickling at my eyes, "I really don't think I would have made it through. Jake, come up here." I beckoned to him to join me on stage and I could see tears forming in his eyes too. He jumped on stage and his 6,10" frame engulfed my tiny body in a large hug and I suddenly felt save, like I always did around him. "I meant every word I just said, he was my personal sun. This is called Halo" I took jakes hands in my own and begun the song.

(Halo by Beyonce)

Remember those walls I built
Well, baby they're tumbling down
And they didn't even put up a fight
They didn't even make up a sound

I found a way to let you in
But I never really had a doubt
Standing in the light of your halo
I got my angel now

It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
It's the risk that I'm takin'
I ain't never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace

You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo

Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light

I swore I'd never fall again
But this don't even feel like falling
Gravity can't forget
To pull me back to the ground again

Feels like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
The risk that I'm takin'
I'm never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace

You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
Halo, halo

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace

You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo

My eyes were prickling the whole way through and I could see Jacobs were too. The song finished and most of the audience stood up and began clapping loudly. I felt honoured, loved, finally. With all the support I was given by all the people here I thought I could just die of being loved, for the first time in a long while!