Nikki

David is acting suspiciously again, so I do more digging.

He leaves the Lyell and I follow closely behind, though not too closely. It wouldn't do to be caught.

Little do I know...

We end up in the underpass and I wonder where the hell he could be going, but I'm stopped in my tracks when he suddenly appears in front of me and reveals that he suspected I was following him and and set a trap. I know that I've been well and truly caught out.

If he did murder Sally, my time is up. I'm next. I'm alone with a dangerous man and no back up.

Why the hell didn't I tell Jack about David?

Jack

I ring Nikki to tell her that Thomas has returned to the salt factory to dig for more evidence. She sounds...different – scared. I sense it's better not to question her on it – given her unwillingness to share things with me at the moment, but I know something is wrong.

When the call ends, I phone Thomas. I don't know what's going on, but I think Nikki is in danger – or at least she thinks she's in danger, which is just as bad – and I don't trust that creep Thomas brought in to work with us. I'm sure he's at the bottom of it somewhere.

Thomas doesn't let me in on anything, but it's clear he's equally concerned. Nikki said that she was going to the police station, so she should be safe for now – especially as Thomas is on his way to meet her there with new evidence. But he later rings me back, Nikki has unintentionally given him the slip whilst he was engaged in conversation and he thinks she's headed back to the Lyell. Clarissa is not answering the phone at present, so we both hot-foot it back there.

Nikki

I'm so glad to hear Jack on the phone. His timing is as impeccable as ever and his calming voice breaks through the nerves brought on by the confrontation with David. When I come off the phone, the man in question has disappeared – no doubt back to the Lyell and it's a fact which annoys and relieves me in equal measure. I have to drop into the police station, which gives me more time to get in a better frame of mind before I see him again – not that I'm ever in a 'good' frame of mind these days. Thomas meets me at the police station with new evidence, which satisfactorily damns the main suspect, so our job is done – for this case anyway. Thomas is deep in conversation with the officer in charge and obviously, since we both arrived separately, we both have our cars here, so I leave and head back to the Lyell – where David is waiting for me.

He wants to finish what we started.

Jack is also still out and Clarissa is...somewhere in the building, I assume – but I can't see her, which means I have no back up again and it occurs to me that this was a bad idea. I get scared too easily nowadays to be alone with I man I suspect to be dangerous. This could end badly.

David is angry – really angry. He yells at me, lurches at me, grabs me and shakes me roughly. I'm so scared – I mean, bloody terrified. I scream and scream, but my shrieks of fright remain unanswered by help and only serve to anger him further. He just wants me to stop.

His hand goes over my mouth in an attempt to muffle my screams, but the familiar feeling that I'm going to run out of air is far to real and it overwhelms me, causing me to panic and bite down. He yells and grips me harder, clamping my mouth. I struggle and try to reach for something – anything off my desk to hit him with – just to get him off me, but I can't find anything, and before I know it, I'm on the cold floor of my office, on my back with him on top of me. I can't breathe and everything is going dark. This is it.

The last thing I hear is Jack yelling my name.

Jack

We get back in the nick of time. David has her on the floor and his hands are around her throat. We pull him off her and I'm just about to wallop him for hurting her – scaring her, when Clarissa, who has just arrived to investigate the commotion, yells at me urgently.

"Jack!"

I look at where she is pointing and the sight that greets me makes my blood run cold. Nikki is completely still. Her mouth is slightly open, her neck is red and her eyes are shut.

"Oh my God! Oh my God! Nikki!" I yell, immediately letting go of David and dropping down next to her. "No! No! No! Please, no!" I sob.

In my panic, I'm unable to locate her pulse, but Thomas is on the other side of her and he finds it for me.

"Jack, Jack – it's ok. She's alive – I think she just passed out, but she's ok."

And right on cue, Nikki opens her beautiful eyes, coughing and spluttering – gasping as I cradle her in my arms.

Nikki

I come around after being reunited with my usual oxygen supply, to see Jack's distraught, but relieved face.

"You're ok. You're ok." He cries in between stunted sobs and rocks me in his warm arms.

I catch sight of Thomas's concerned face. I give him a weak smile to reassure him that I'm ok and he shakes his head at me partly relieved – partly exasperated. "You must have nine lives!"

"Should I ring an ambulance?" Clarissa asks.

"No...I'm...fine." I insist – my voice coming out a little hoarse. Unsurprisingly, my throat is dry and sore. "Water...water" I request. I shudder – suddenly realising that David is sat watching me and Jack hugs me tighter.

"I'm so sorry, Nikki." David mutters.

Jack's protective nature takes over and he turns around angrily. "Shut up! You don't get to speak to her! What the hell did you think you were doing?! You nearly fucking killed her!"

"I'm sorry." David repeats. "I didn't mean to hurt her – I just wanted to stop her screaming."

"I'm fine, Jack – honestly." I whisper, sipping the water Thomas has brought me. "He said he didn't kill Sally."

"I didn't" David agrees. "I didn't kill Sally – I'm innocent."

Jack

I scoff. He damn well nearly killed Nikki – that's not my idea of someone who's 'innocent'!

"Give us Gwen's address." Nikki tells him. "If what you said is true, then I'm the one who's sorry!"

She's going to say sorry to him when he nearly bloody killed her?!

David writes the address down and hands it over. "Are we going to sort this out?" The bastard has the gall to ask her.

"No." She answers firmly. "Jack and I are. You stay here."

"Nikki" I whisper. "You need to rest, love."

"I'm fine, Jack – I promise. I want to get this sorted." She says stubbornly.

So with Thomas's agreement, the two of us head to Gwen's farm. I think her throat is sore because she winces from time to time as she talks, but Nikki tells me everything on the way. Everything she's kept from me. How the police suspected David. How coming back to work early wasn't really her idea. How she's been 'keeping an eye' on David at the police's request.

The latter angersme, because they suspected he was a murderer and they still put her directly in harm's way by making her follow him. How dare they!

We get to the farm and knock – but there is no answer. It's dark but, as I have a torch, we decide to have a look around anyway. We find a car with a damaged bumper and traces of red paint – at which point Nikki informs me that Sally drove a red Mercedes.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I ask her.

She looks at me questionably – not understanding what I'm referring to. "About what?"

"About David." I clarify.

She hesitates slightly."You didn't ask." she answers quietly. She's right – I didn't ask. She obviously reads my eyes though, when they say 'I shouldn't have to ask – you used to tell me everything' because she adds, "It wasn't my call."

"Since when has that stopped you?" I remark softly and for a brief moment she stares at me with almost a shy kind of blush.

You used to tell me everything. I repeat in my head – but again I choose not to utter the words, instead opting to stick with the job in hand, "If Gwen and Brian are stealing body parts regularly, they must have a regular buyer." I'm interrupted by a power tool and we follow the sound, unwittingly walking into danger – for there in the barn are Gwen and Brian in the process of destroying a red Mercedes – Sally's red Mercedes.

And then they see us.

I'm so angry when Hawke threatens her with that power-tool. How dare he threaten Nikki. When he runs – I just see red. I chase him, catch him and start punching, but the damn man won't stop – won't stay down. So I keep going.

As usual, Nikki ignores my meaningful gesture to 'stay there' where I know she is safe. She's not being deliberately disobedient – she's just as desperate to save me from trouble, as I am desperate to save her from danger. Suddenly she's trying to pull me away from him, yelling my name – trying to protect me when I'm trying to protect her. It distracts me and gives Hawke the opportunity to get close enough to her, to do her harm.

He punches her hard in the face – knocking her to the ground and she groans in pain and shock. Men that hit women make me feel sick and my stomach churns at him hitting Nikki. It angers me even more and I throw another punch to stop him following, before scrambling over to Nikki. I take her face in my hands – she's still groaning, clearly hurt.

"You ok? You ok?" I ask, gently pulling her face towards me, so I can assess the damage he's done to her. "Let me see. Let me see." Her nose is bleeding and it's sight that shocks and repulses me, but I try to reassure her. I caress her face lovingly. "You're ok. You're ok."

Hawke dares to get up again and terrified he's going top hit Nikki again, I throw another punch – knocking him out this time. I collapse on the ground and stare in horror at the amount of blood dripping down her beautiful face. She stares back at me in shock – I can't tell whether it's directed at me or the situation she's found herself in, but I know one thing – it was my fault she got punched because she was trying to stop us fighting. If I had stayed with her instead of chasing after him, she wouldn't have got hurt.

I'm too dangerous to be around her. I have to stop caring to protect her. It's going to hurt and I think the only way I can do it, is too stop caring about everything.

I have to cut myself off from my feelings and become unemotional. It's dangerous to me because I risk losing my humanity – but if it saves Nikki, I'm willing to do anything.

I have to change who I am.