A/N: nothing that's relevant to this story but I want to share something with you guys. I wrote the story I'm Not a Teen Mom because I'm always out and about with my nieces. Since I wear no make, making me look like a 14 year old, I stopped and thought 'do people think they're my kids?' Well it happened. I was at a gas station with my niece buying her snacks when the gas register person asked 'hi how are you? Is she your daughter?' I laughed and said 'no she's my niece.' So to answer my question, yes people do.
Disclaimer: I own the plot bunnies in my brain.
When Temari regained her conscious mind the first thing she noticed was her body was sore. Blinking slowly she allowed her senses to come back to her. Her room was dark. It was either night time or very early morning. She felt another body clinging to hers.
She felt soft breaths on her neck. She could make out his hair, the arm under her pillow, and of course his body heat. Suddenly the realization of what they did came crashing down.
She began to curse in her head. At that moment she took all the curse words Hidan every spewed and recited them. It took all her willpower not to fling herself out of her bed.
So she did the only natural thing when you have three rounds of sex with your ex-boyfriend.
She scrambled out of bed and ninja crawled around until she found any type of clothing. She hastily put whatever she found and quickly made her exit.
Screw shoes she had to leave!
She opened her bedroom door and immediately tripped over Hank's large body. Hank jumped up startled.
Temari thanked her lucky stars that Shikamaru slept like a rock.
Groaning and ignoring the different sensations her body felt (some from the sex others from the fall) Temari shakily stood up. She found her keys on the kitchen counter and ran towards the door. Temari yanked the front door open and called out to her giant animal.
"Hank let's go," Temari made a hurrying motion with her hand.
Hank sensing her urgency ran out the door.
Temari shut the door and ran to her car.
If any of her neighbors saw her they would probably call the nearest insane asylum.
Getting in her car Temari started the engine and hit the gas. Hank didn't have any time to make himself comfortable in the back, or really adjust his body to the size of a car. He lurched forward and then sideways as Temari continued to break every driving law in the book.
"Sorry boy! There's no time I have to see Tenten."
Hank's huge body already had some difficulty fitting in Temari's car. Having her drive around like a manic did nothing to help his long limbs or large body fit anywhere at the moment. Hank continued to flail around and he let Temari know with his whining and occasional yelp.
"Almost there. Sorry Hank!"
Finally arriving at Tenten's apartment Temari slammed on the brakes. The car came to a halting stop and Hank nearly collided with the dashboard. Temari profusely apologized as she got out the car and let Hank out as well.
With no leash on him Temari grabbed his collar and walked hastily toward her best frined's door. Hank kept up with her speed but his mind was rattling. Not to mention his body was in slight discomfort by the driving.
Temari banged on the door once she and Hank reached. Feeling restless and panicky Temari banged on the door some more. Hank sat down and waited. Hopefully none of the neighbors would come out to investigate.
Temari was ready to kick the door down when Neji threw the door open.
"What. Is. It?" Neji bit out threw gritted teeth.
Temari didn't answer as she pushed Neji aside and walked in. Hank licked Neji's face as a hello.
Tenten walked out of the bedroom with a blue robe on, she flicked the living room light on. "Temari what are you doing here? Are you alright?"
"It's 3 am. Why are you not at home?" Neji asked hotly.
Temari took in Tenten's lack of dress and Neji more than normal foul mood.
"Oh for fucks sake you two were having sex."
Tenten flushed red and stammered out something as a reply.
Neji continued to glare.
"Shit please tell me you do not have a boner right now."
"Then don't look down."
Temari covered her eyes "fuck me. Fuck me!"
All embarrassment aside Neji and Tenten could tell she was very upset. Tenten quietly led Temari to the couch, "whatever happened it's alright."
"No it's not!"
Neji ushered Hank away from the living room. The dog made no fuss as he trotted toward the bedroom. Neji walked to the kitchen to grab some alcohol. It probably wasn't a good idea to give an upset woman a drink but he clearly needed one.
"Temari what happened?" Tenten was very concerned for her friend, especially since Temari wasn't wearing any shoes, had on a pair of boxers, and an off yellow shirt on.
"How to fucking start," Temari snapped.
"The beginning might be helpful," Neji put down some wine glasses as he began to fill them.
"I don't need your smart ass remarks." Temari glared but was thankful for the drink.
"Then stopping being an idiot."
"Enough both of you," Tenten reprimanded. "We're adult here."
"Some more than others," Neji mumbled.
Tenten shot her future husband a warning glare. He rolled his eyes and took a big gulp of wine.
Having some wine in her system Temari finally realized the gravity of her situation.
"I missed your engagement party! I missed the party because of sex! With Shikamaru of all people!"
Silence filled the apartment.
"Neji!"
"I told you the risks before we agreed to invite him."
"That doesn't help!" Tenten cried out.
"No harm done. I don't see the issue."
"Are kidding me?!" Temari screeched "I just had sex with someone I haven't talked to much less seen in years! I miss-"
"There was no engagement party. At least not last night."
"What?" Temari's voice was deadly calm.
"We planned out this reunion before moving on with the actual celebration." Neji calmly replied.
Temari slowly turned to look at her so called best friend. Tenten bit her lip and looked away.
"I hate the both of you so much right now."
"You're being dramatic."
"I'm being-"
"Do you love him or not?"
Temari shut her mouth.
"It is a simple question."
"Shut-"
"If you did not love him then you would have kept the conversation civil. At best you would hug and make up. The worst you would slam the door and just agree to smile for our sake. Once again do you love him or not?"
Temari began to shake from anger. She took her glass of wine and chugged it. "I fucking hate you."
"You're welcome."
"Neji please can you give us a moment?"
Neji shrugged and walked to the bathroom. The only room left not occupied by hormonal women or animals.
Temari looked at her state of clothes and blushed.
"For fucks sake these are his boxers."
"You sure didn't waste time getting the hell out of your place." Tenten attempted a joke.
Temari didn't smile or laugh. She continued to fume. "At the very least you should have given me a warning."
"What good would that do? You wouldn't be honest with yourself if I did that."
"So instead you lead me into an unwelcomed reunion blind? And that worked out marvelously," Temari replied sarcastically.
"You two were bound to meet again because of our wedding. We thought it would be a better idea if you were both sober instead at our celebration party with alcohol in abundance."
Temari leaned back on the couch and glared at the ceiling. "Not how I pictured meeting him again."
Tenten smiled and threw her arms around her best friend. "Come on spill."
"….sex was great."
Both women erupted into laughter.
"Not completely bad was it?"
Temari felt her anger and tension slowly release itself from her body. "I guess not."
"So how mad would you be if we invited him over?"
Temari counted to ten before answering. "What?"
"You didn't expect Neji to leave us alone and not talk to him right? For all we know Shikamaru is out buying some sort of apology gift to soothe your rage."
"It's 3 in the morning."
"Neji is getting back at you for interrupting us."
Temari felt goosebumps throughout her body. "Let go of me."
Tenten rolled her eyes. "Lady you just had sex too. If anything this is bringing us closer together."
"No seriously let go," Temari tried to pry Tenten's arms off of her.
"But I love you!"
"And I hate you!"
"If you cannot be nice to my soon to be wife then you may leave."
"I wasn't talking to you asshat! And no one invited you back!"
"This is my home."
"Our home!"
"Our home," Neji corrected himself. "And as such you're lucky I didn't leave you and your mutt outside."
"Say what you want about me but leave Hank out of this."
"I couldn't leave him outside of anything with his huge size."
"Why you little-"
"People can't we just all get along?" Tenten moped.
Temari and Neji glared intensely at each other.
The two continued to bicker with Tenten trying hopelessly to break up the squabble. A short while later soft knocking was heard at the door. Temari began to sweat, Neji went to open the door, and Tenten patted her friend's head.
Shikamaru stood at the doorway looking lost and confused. His hair was down and he wore the same clothes from earlier. "Uh hey."
"Come in," Neji opened the door wider and stepped aside.
Temari crossed her arms over she chest and looked away. Tenten lightly slapped her arm. "Be nice."
"Bite me."
"I believe he did that already."
Temari threw her a nasty glare.
Tenten ignored her and smiled up at the nervous man. "Hey Shikamaru. Nice night huh?"
Shikamaru rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "It's been a good night."
Hearing those words caused Temari to flush red.
Neji prayed for some sort of patience with these two. He returned to the kitchen for more alcohol.
"I say we play a game!"
Both Shikamaru and Temari stared at their mutual friend as though she grew a third head.
"Are you crazy?"
"I don't think-"
"Excellent idea love." Neji came back with a few beers and placed them on the coffee table.
"Great we'll play Uno." Tenten clapped.
"Do you remember the last time we all played a game together? It was a disaster!"
"So you want to me get Taboo instead?" Tenten asked innocently.
"You still have it?!" Temari then glared at Neji "why haven't you burned it."
"It's not my game."
"Everyone sit down and I'll go get it." Tenten grinned and left the living room to her bedroom.
Neji and Shikamaru took a seat on the floor by the square coffee table. Temari feeling awkward sitting so high from the table also sat on the floor. Unfortunately her position was sitting across from Shikamaru. He gave her a small smile but she could see that her abrupt departure had hurt him.
She could feel Neji's disapproving gaze burning her skin.
Luckily Tenten returned with the deck of cards.
"Alright Shikamaru if you would please shuffle the deck."
Tenten handed the lazy man the deck of cards. He expertly shuffled the cards and dealt each player seven cards. He then took the top card from the deck and placed in the middle of the table.
Red 7.
The game had begun.
To help with the awkwardness everyone took a beer and began to drink. Well Temari chugged her first beer and opened the second one.
No one said a word.
They went around in a circle, putting down a card or drawing from the deck. Soon the alcohol helped ease the tension and small talk soon broke out.
"Hank is currently hiding the furthest corner of the room."
Temari gave her friend a confused look. "Why?"
"Nightfall is on the bed."
Temari shook her head. She put down a blue 3. "It's weird. He's bigger than any other dog at the park but if a Chihuahua comes barking at him he'll flip."
"Your dog is a wimp."
"Your cat is just a hell demon." Shikamaru placed down a green zero card.
Neji smirked "I'd like to see anyone try to make a harming move toward us. They'll end up in a hospital."
"We don't want that now do we dear?" Tenten asked too sweetly.
"Of course not," Neji's smirk didn't leave his handsome face.
"Demon cat I swear." Shikamaru complained.
Tenten then put down a red 5. Three hands slammed down on top of the card. Temari who was taking a sip from her beer almost spit it out in a confused daze.
"What the hell was that?"
The other three gave her confused looks.
"It's the five rule." Neji explained slowly.
"The fuck is the five rule?!"
"Wait you don't play with that rule?" Tenten asked genuinely confused.
"I've never heard of this."
"Basically when someone puts down a five we all have to put our hands on top. The last person to do so has to draw three cards." Shikamaru broke down the rule.
"Well shit thanks for the heads up guys." Temari rolled her eyes.
"Alright calm your tits. No penalty this round."
"I'm so grateful for your compassion." Sarcasm dripped heavily in her words.
"Don't get sassy with me young lady."
"I'm older than you."
"Not by a lot!"
"Still older."
"Bitch."
"Whore."
Tenten gasped dramatically "why I never."
Temari cracked a smile, "I know the truth can be shocking."
"Yes because you've handle the truth so well lately." Neji drew a card from the deck.
Temari reached for an empty beer bottle. Tenten threw her arms around him.
"I'd like him alive! At least until we're legally married."
"Are you sure? I think you can do better."
Neji threw down his card on top of the growing pile with excessive force. Temari merely laughed and Shikamaru chuckled.
They continued to go around placing cards. All found themselves enjoying their time together. Of course alcohol helped with that tremendously. Soon all were more or less tipsy but no one admitted to it.
"Are you visual impaired? The deck is over here." Neji picked up Temari's thrown card and placed it on top the growing pile.
"It slipped out of my fingers!"
"Admit it your drunk."
"Says the person who confused a six for a nine, they have the lines for a reason!"
Neji bristled at his perfect eye sight being mocked.
Tenten just laughed in her drunken stupor. Shikamaru almost chocked on his beer from trying and failing to hold back a laugh.
"Do not spill anything on the carpet. It's bad enough we have hair everywhere." Neji tried to change the topic of the conversation.
"Yours or the cats?" Temari was not ready to let him off the hook so easily.
Tenten howled in laughter and Shikamaru put down his beer, so not to spill, and let out a heartfelt laugh as well.
Neji felt his body throb at the insult. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He could not commit murder. He just recently got engaged and he would very much like to see the day he marries Tenten.
"Nara put down a card or I will kick you out."
"I don't know where my cards are."
All three turned to stare at him.
"What?" Tenten asked.
"I had my cards then I didn't." Shikamaru shrugged carelessly.
"If that's the case," Neji put down a card.
Plus 4.
Temari's alcohol clouded mind couldn't believe the atrocity that just occurred. She knew that her and Neji's friendship was strained at best, but this? She couldn't believe him! She expected this from Tenten but Neji? Oh she was deeply offended.
"You're an evil, vile person! You're the spawn of Satan!"
"Would you just-"
"You're not allowed to talk! Spawn of Satan!"
Tenten was also shocked at her future husband's choice of card. "Neji!"
"She started it!"
"You're not supposed to be the cry baby." She points at Shikamaru "that's his job!"
"I am not a cry baby!" Neji defended himself lamely.
"What are you doing right now?"
"Making you draw four cards!"
"The hell I am!"
Hank decided to come out of the bedroom and investigate all the noise. He found all four humans sitting on the floor yelling at each other. The room also reeked of some foul odor. Hank licked his lips and walked over to Temari leisurely.
His tail was moving in gently swishing and he careful maneuvered around Tenten. He still smacked Tenten across the face with his long tail.
"Damn it Hank!"
Hank paid her no mind as he crawled onto Temari's lap.
Temari leaned back to rest against the couch. His heavy body quickly warming up hers, "Jesus Hank you're not a lap dog."
Hank didn't look guilt, not even a little bit. He merely sat on her lap as his large body blocked her eye sight from everyone and everything.
"You're cards," Neji slid four cards toward Temari's generally direction.
"Excuse me I didn't say I was accepting those!"
"It's a rule."
"Screw the rules!"
"Shut up and drink both of you!" Tenten thrust more beer into their hands.
Hank took a whiff of the beer but snorted when he didn't like the smell. Temari happily took the drink as did Neji.
Shikamaru who was getting tired of sitting in the same spot moved over slightly.
"Found my cards." Turns out he was sitting on them.
"You dick." If Temari could glare of him she would. Hopefully her words carried the hate she wanted to direct at him.
Shikamaru felt her venom and sitting across from Hank did not help his uneasiness.
"Sorry."
"Come on Temari you're turn. Let's keep the game going!" Tenten cried out just a little too loudly.
"I can't even see the card!"
"I pick the new color. I chose yellow."
"Coward," Temari spat. She picked up her four cards and was thinking on which card to place down.
"You either have the color or you don't."
"Hank eat him!"
Hank turned his head and licked her face.
"To think you kissed her face." Neji's gave Shikamaru a sideways glace.
"Asshole!"
"So I've been told."
Temari craned her neck to try and see around Hank. She practically threw the card onto the table.
Skip turn.
"Temari I thought we were friends!" Tenten gasped.
"I didn't have any other card…"
"B-But you're my maid of honor!"
"Jesus woman I'm sorry! Trade places with that human ice cube and keep your turn."
"That's cheating! And cheaters never win!" Tenten cried.
"Calm-"
"Do not tell me to calm down!" Tenten whirled around to yell at her future spouse. She closed her mouth and looked toward the small hallway. "I need to pee."
If this were an anime or cartoon then everyone, Hank included, would have sweat dropped at the drastic change in mood.
Tenten jumped up and skipped to the bathroom. Only to hurryingly come back to pick up her cards, she took them to the bathroom with her.
"Smart."
"Are you implying I would look at Tenten's cards?" Neji glared at Shikamaru.
"When you have drinks in your system you become more of a sore loser."
"I do not."
"You're doing it now."
"I am not."
"Sore loser."
"I am not a loser! Of any kind!"
Pause.
"Loser."
Neji lost his cool and slammed his hands on the small coffee table.
"I'll prove it!"
Oh no.
"Hey let's calm down over there!" Temari cried out behind Hank's back.
"Alright how about a dare?" Shikamaru smirked.
"Name it." Neji matched Shikamaru's stare with his own over confident gaze.
"Try to get Tenten's cards. Do whatever it takes."
"I'm not going to take her cards." He scoffed at the idea.
"I'm back!" Tenten sang as she took her spot next to Neji.
"Run! It's a trap!" Temari failed her arms wildly.
Tenten merely blinked at her friend's strange behavior.
"Scared?" Shikamaru taunted.
Neji stared at Tenten long and hard. She began to fidget under his intensive gaze.
"N-Neji?"
His vision changed direction to the cards in her hand. Tenten followed his eye sight and quickly shielded her cards with both hands and brought them to her chest.
"Don't you dare."
Suddenly both moved simultaneously. Neji who still had his hands on the table used them to give him momentum. His flung himself on top of Tenten. Tenten shrieked and tried to crawl back. Neji landed on her lower portion of her body and inched him way to the top.
Shikamaru laughed, Hank began to bark madly, and Temari didn't see a damn thing.
Tenten twisted around violently and help the cards as far away from her body and Neji's as possible.
Neji was clearly taller and didn't have a problem reaching over and grazing his fingertips against her hand and the cards.
"I swear I will withhold sex! Until the wedding!"
Neji froze; Temari and Shikamaru gaped at Tenten.
Using this distraction Tenten squeezed her way out from under Neji and ran to the room. Neji shook himself out of his stupor and gave chase. Nightfall hissed and yowled loudly as he scurried out of the room. He hid under the couch.
Hank jumped up at seeing Nightfall so suddenly and knocked over all the beer bottles and cards from the table. Temari and Shikamaru soon found themselves smelling like beer and wet.
Temari glared heavily at the lazy man across from her. "Nice plan smart ass."
"One of the many possible endings I thought up."
Temari rubbed her temple. She was never going to be allowed back here again. She probably wasn't even allowed at the wedding! Hank whined and ran to the furthest corner the kitchen had. His face was against the wall with his back toward Temari and the living room. Occasionally he looked over his shoulder to see where the cat was hiding. He didn't move from his spot.
Temari looked around at the mess caused by the so called genus. She began to pick up the beer bottles and place them back on the coffee table. Shikamaru was doing the same on his side. After that was cleaned up they started picking up the scattered cards.
Shrieking (was it sexual? Or was Tenten just drunk?) was heard from the room followed by laughter then silence.
"For fucks sake they're having sex." Temari let her head fall onto the table. "This is pay back from earlier. What did I do in a past life to deserve this?!"
"For one you can explain why you left so abruptly."
Temari didn't lift her head or answer him.
"I know some people don't talk during sex but meant everything I said." Shikamaru stared down at the cards he had in his hand.
"Please stop talking."
"This meeting was less than ideal but I wouldn't change it. I just hoped that my feelings would be returned…again."
"Don't start with that. This has nothing to do with high school!"
"Doesn't it?" Shikamaru stared at the top of her head. "This certainly feels like when we talked after that house party. The only difference you had the courage to look me in the eye."
Temari snapped her gaze into his. Whatever anger or retort she had was lost. Looking into his brown eyes made her lose everything. This is how she ended up sleeping with him! His eyes still held the same amount of love from back then. She could suddenly hear and feel his breath as he whispered and groaned sweet nothings.
"You're so beautiful."
"I missed you so much."
"I didn't want to let go. I won't let go."
"I still love you. I thought I made it clear that Nara men keep their troublesome woman. It's too troublesome to let go."
Temari found herself laughing. His speech wasn't funny; in fact it was the opposite. But she couldn't stop herself. Shikamaru tossed the cards carelessly away and crawled over to her side.
He gently cupped her face and placed a kiss on her lips, effectively shutting her up.
"Are you sane now?"
"You should now me better than that." Temari teased.
Shikamaru felt his lips twitch upwards. "Then you should know that we have a wedding to go to."
"Who said you were my date?"
"It would be awkward for you to invite someone else only to have me by your side all night."
"I hope you know that by the time the sun rises all three of us will be kicked out and uninvited to the wedding."
Shikamaru laughed. "I'm ok with that. Weddings are too troublesome."
"That attitude better change soon!"
"Why? Wanna get married?" Shikamaru grinned
"First thing first. We need to have you move back to town. Then you're gonna have to work for my attention again."
"Jesus troublesome woman. Can't we just kiss and make up like normal people?"
"I'm the owner of a Great Dane. Add that to my psychotic family and you never had normal to begin with."
Shikamaru placed a tender kiss on her lips. "I wouldn't have you any other way." He stared into her eyes lovingly until Hank came running over knocking everything off the table again. Only this time the table was throw over and some bottles braking in the process.
Nightfall had come out from under the couch and merely looked at Hank. This was enough for him to run to the opposite of the apartment.
"What the fuck are you two doing out there?!" Neji roared from the bedroom.
"Nothing that concerns you!" Temari yelled back.
"Take it outside!"
"No fucking way!"
"Again?" Tenten cried out frustrated.
Shikamaru blushed and didn't know what to do. Should he calm down Temari or clean up the mess?
Hank then pushed Shikamaru aside so that he could cuddle with his owner. She would protect him from the evil fur ball!
He landed on his back and felt some beer soak into his shirt and carpet.
They were soo not invited to the wedding anymore.
This came out way longer than I anticipated.
But I enjoyed writing it and I hope you all enjoyed reading it!
Review my lovelies
