Chapter 3
To Give is Better Than to Receive
The night had grown long, but the snow didn't tire. Kate was standing on a corner and looked up at the dark windows of Richard Castle's apartment. She was covered in snow and the roads were barren of cars. She could not be more alone in the world than when she stood there. It almost felt like she was the last person alive, a creepy feeling that she couldn't shake. The cab she came in would probably be one of the last ones out and about as the roads were already troublesome to travel.
As seconds ticked by she began to think about heading home. The lights were out which meant they had already gone to bed. She looked down at her father's watch, the face showed nine-thirteen. Early, she thought, but then maybe it's what they did on Christmas Eve.
She sighed and turned away from the building and looked back at the way she had come. The tire tracks of the cab were nothing but tiny gullies in the plane of snow. Her foot prints had disappeared, the snow erasing them, leaving behind only slightly deeper pits. It was like she didn't even exist. She pushed that thought away and began to leave. She'd give him the gifts she had with her next time he came by the station.
The sodium light lit her way as she began to cross the street, hoping to find a cab on a more plowed road, but she only made it to the sidewalk corner on the other side when a cab started to come down the road. The chained tires threw snow to the sides and the front bumper plowed forward through the snow at a snails pace. She stood and waited to see if there was anyone in it, hoping she'd get lucky on the cab.
To her surprise it stopped in the middle of road in front of Rick's building, the driver probably afraid he'd get stuck if he moved into where it wasn't plowed. There were two shadows in the back of the cab. One reached up and handed the driver something and then opened the door.
Rick got out first, his face turning red in the cold and snow flakes laid across his hair and coat. They fell away when he reached back in and helped Alexis out and then picked up a few things from the back. Alexis laughed when Rick grumbled about something and Kate smiled as she watched them both.
Alexis headed toward the door, swiped the card and went inside, Kate guessed to call the elevator while Rick got the rest of the bags. The cab took off after a moment and Rick stood in the middle of the street trying to gather all of the bags. He looked up after he failed for the second time and their eyes met. Kate's breath caught, she didn't think he would notice her from where she was, but he looked right at her.
"Beckett?" He said and Kate sighed, but it wasn't unhappy. This was why she had come all this way, wasn't it? He grabbed the bags and pulled them from the middle of the street and into the snow pile near the curb. That done he looked up and down the road and then jogged his way over to her. She smiled as he got closer and he smiled back. "I'm surprised to see you here."
"I'm surprised to be here, but I sort of wanted to give you these." She said slowly and held up a bag. There were wrapped gifts inside, presents for Rick, Alexis and Martha. She thought it might be a little forward, but it gave her the excuse to stop by and see him anyway and she wanted to thank all of them for everything. She handed them over to him and he looked down and smiled.
"Thanks," he said and she turned and looked at the building across the street, stuffing her hands into her pockets.
"It's not much, just... wanted to get you all something."
"You didn't have too, but I have some presents for you as well."
"Really? You didn't have t-" She said surprised, and was cut off.
"Of course, can't not get my work wife something for Christmas."
"I am not your work wife."
"I thought we went through this already?" He said and she couldn't help but laugh.
"So, you've reconsidered my offer?" He said after a moment. There was a hopeful tone to his voice and her thoughts went back to the man in the park. Maybe it would make Rick's Christmas, though the idea that she could do that for him was absurd, and just a little egotistical. Still, it was that thought, that they could both make the night better for each other, that had brought her all this way.
"Maybe, I dunno."
"Come on, you're here now. You have to come inside and have dinner with us."
"Oh? I do?"
"Yes, and I will carry you if I have to." Rick said and she glared at him but it lost most of it's menace because she smiled while doing it.
"Sure, Castle, I would love to se- Castle!" Rick picked her up easily, one arm at her knees and the other supported her back. He started to carry her across the street before she could say anything more.
"Castle, put me down!" She finally got out once she was over her surprise.
"Not until you promise that you'll come up for dinner and hang out with us." He said. He was already at the other side of the street and almost to the door, carrying her easily even while the snow made it hard to walk. Through the glass doors Kate could see the doorman watching them both with mild amusement and Kate felt her cheeks burn.
"Okay, fine! Just put me down." She said looking away from the building and she wondered if it was possible to die from embarrassment. Rick laughed as he gently put her to her feet.
"See, that wasn't so hard-ow!" She punched him as soon as she was on the ground, her eyes narrowed at him. He started to laugh as he placed a hand to his shoulder. "Okay, I may have deserved that."
"May have?" Kate asked and crossed her arms.
"Detective Beckett? Hey! Dad said you'd be here a while ago, did the snow hold you up?" Alexis came out of the door and rushed up to both them, beaming.
"He did?" Kate said and shot Rick a questioning glance which he shrugged off.
"Yeah, we went out to get some stuff hoping we'd be back before you got here. I'm glad we were." Alexis said and reached over and brought Kate into a hug. "Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas," Kate said grinning and squeezed back. "And it's Kate, okay?"
"Fine with me," Alexis said and turned around to her dad. "Those bags are getting soaked, Dad. If anything gets ruined it's your fault."
Rick laughed. "It always is. Can you give me a hand you think?" He said to Kate and she nodded, "Good. Sweetheart, hold the door."
"You told her I was coming?" Kate said as she picked up a few of the bags. They were heavy, at least the ones she grabbed and she wondered what was inside. Probably some expensive toy he saw on sale.
"I took a gamble." He said as if that answered everything.
"And if I didn't?"
"The snow would be a good enough excuse I guess, but I was sure you'd show up at some point."
"Why?" How could he be so sure? She had told him no, and usually when she told him no it didn't change.
"Because, it was my wish for the holiday."
They passed through the door and headed to the elevator and all the while Kate's mind was in overdrive. He wished for her to come to dinner? Why? Was he kidding about it? She wouldn't put it past him, but the way he said it made her believe that he had actually done it. She began to gnaw on her lip as she tried to calm her mind. Did it really matter? She was there now.
They waited for Alexis and then rode the elevator up to Rick's apartment.
Christmas had come to Rick's apartment in full force. Garland hung from the rafters and the tree was lit with color and white lights, fully decked out with more ornaments then she could possibly count. The fire place on the one end of the room was lit and threw warm light and flickering shadows through the room until Rick turned the lights on.
Under the tree were a number of presents, most small which surprised her. She followed Rick to the kitchen and sat the bags she was carrying onto the counter next to the rest.
She turned back to the fireplace and watched the flames for a little bit feeling awkward already. The feeling became even worse when she saw four stockings hanging by it. The first three she could make out the name on, they were for the Castle family, which was no surprise, but the last one laid so that the top folded together and she couldn't read the name.
Could it be for Gina? Or Meredith? Could they be here as well? That would make this even worse and she was beginning to regret the decision to come.
"Grams!" Alexis called bounding off to the stairs. She called again but there was no answer and she rushed up the stairs all the while calling for Martha.
"Martha asleep?" Kate asked, turning to Rick as he pulled a few wrapped presents from one of the bags. He shrugged as he went to the tree and sat them under it and then did the same with the gifts she had given him outside.
"She wanted to take a nap, we usually stay up pretty late on Christmas Eve now that Alexis is older." He said and returned back to the counter. "I'm glad you reconsidered."
"I am too, I think. So, is it just us four?" Kate asked, she couldn't help it, she wanted to know. She had to know who the other stocking was for.
He nodded. "Why? Expecting someone else?"
"No, just... no." She said flatly and he smiled.
"Okay then, want to help me set the table?"
"You haven't ate yet? It's almost ten."
He shrugged and went to the cabinets, pulled out a few plates that looked older than anything in the apartment. "We eat late too, and we were sort of waiting on you."
"I can't believe you were so sure I'd show."
"I told you, it was my Christmas wish. Santa never disappointed me before." The boyish grin he had made her laugh. He pointed out where the forks and knives were and she gathered up four pairs and laid them out around the plates. Rick continued to go back and forth from the kitchen, his hands full with bowls of food and he placed them around the table where ever they would fit. He was right, they did make too much food. "Hope you like ham, Mother made it so I'm praying that it tastes better than last year."
"Why, what was wrong with it last year?"
"The ham-"
"Don't listen to him, he's exaggerating. The ham was just a little over cooked." Martha came down off the stairs wearing a red and green dress that had just the right amount of holiday spirit. She crossed the room and gathered Kate up into a hug.
"Merry Christmas, dear."
"Merry Christmas, Martha, thanks for having me."
"You're always welcome here, you know that," she said looking over to Rick who nodded and then fixed his eyes on her.
"That ham wasn't over cooked, mother, it was a piece of charcoal."
"Oh hush, then next time you make Christmas dinner. Besides, that stove has always cooked things goofy."
"Yes... it was the stove and I would, but you take over the kitchen every-" A timer went off in said kitchen and Martha took off, hushing Rick with a raised finger. She went into the kitchen, grabbed two oven mitts and from the oven she pulled out the nicest looking ham Kate had ever seen. It was also much too large for just the four of them.
"Mother, where did you get that thing?" Rick asked coming up to the counter and looking down at the glazed chunk of meat. "Did you take lessons or something?"
"See, I can do all right sometimes." Martha said beaming and Rick reached out to take a small piece from it but had his hand slapped. "Not until it's on the table... I swear," she said and looked over at Kate. "Thirty something years old and he still acts like he's twelve sometimes."
"Don't I know it," Kate said and got a glare from Rick. He turned away, his brow furrowed as he stared at the trashcan that sat beside the counter. She knew that look, he was onto something. She moved to the counter and put her back to it, waiting to see what it was.
"And you're still the actor." Rick said, opening the trash can and pulled out a bag from a restaurant down the street. "Nice, Mother."
Martha shrugged. "Well, you can't blame a girl for trying, and besides... that ham was awful last year." She laughed and picked up the ham and took it over to the table. She placed it at one end and looked expectantly back to where Kate and Rick stood.
"Just going to stand there or are we going to eat sometime tonight?" She said and took a seat at one side of the table.
Kate felt Rick's hands touch her shoulder and she turned to look up at him. "You heard the lady," Rick said and then moved away to the table and pulled out a chair for Kate which she took.
"Of course you don't do that for your own mother." Martha said, but she had the slightest smirk on her lips.
"You already sat down," Rick shot back and Martha turned her hands up as if to say, 'oh sure, use that.' Once Kate was seated Rick went to the stairs and called for Alexis.
"Be right down!"
"You better hurry up, otherwise I won't leave you any stuffing." This seemed to do it as a moment later Alexis rushed down the stairs, carrying three presents which were balanced precariously on top of each other.
"I had to finish wrapping the gifts," she said to Rick as she weaved past him and to the tree. "And I had to rewrap some of the ones you did."
"What was wrong with my wrapping?"
"You used as much tape as wrapping paper, dad." She said throwing him a glare. "I had to use scissors to get it off."
"Well, I didn't want a certain someone peaking."
"Don't you dare look over here, darling." Martha said with a pointed finger and he adverted his gaze to Kate.
"Not me either, Castle." She said and he looked down at the floor like a scolded child. The look disappeared just as quickly as it came and he smiled again.
"Okay, well let's get to the food then, shall we?" Rick said and placed a hand to Alexis's back, steering her to the table.
Kate watched as Rick took the seat opposite of her and where the ham was sitting. He picked up a large fork and a knife and she prayed he wouldn't cut himself with it as he began to slice into the meat.
She found herself thinking of the one Christmas where her dad did such a thing, slicing into his hand with a large knife. There was blood everywhere, Kate had yelped, her uncle stood up in shock, but her mom calmly got up, went to the kitchen and came back with a towel and wrapped her dad's hand with it. That was the year they spent Christmas Eve in the ER. While it wasn't the Christmas they expected, it did make it one she wouldn't forget. She smiled once Rick put the knife down and began to put the ham on a plate which he passed to Alexis.
"I see you're amazed by my carving skills." Rick said catching her staring.
"Just amazed you still have all your fingers." She said and took a plate that Martha handed over and put two pieces of ham on her plate. He laughed first and then the rest joined in.
The dinner went smoothly with lots of talk and laughter. Kate couldn't remember the last time she had such a good time. They had made her feel so welcome, like she was part of the family.
She wouldn't mind that either, she found herself thinking as she sat sipping coffee while Christmas music played from the sound system. Alexis was talking to Martha about what she got Ash for Christmas while Rick was working on finishing off his piece of pie.
How did this happen?
She found herself asking that question as she watched Rick. He had been a part of her life before he even knew she existed. His stories had helped her through the hardest time of her life and he'd have never known it until they started working together. He was different than what she thought he would be, especially with how he wrote, but the more she got to know him she realized that he wasn't different at all.
He was charming, handsome, funny, intelligent, loving and caring. He just had a persona it seemed for the general people in his life. She got to see him for who he really was. She was glad he was still with her because in truth... she cared about him more than he could ever know. More than she could probably ever explain.
He looked up, probably felt her eyes on him and he gave her a curious look before smiling and leaning back in his chair. His hands went behind his head and he stretched. "So, now that dinner is over, it's present time I believe." He said and got up, rushing over to the tree.
"Dad has been waiting for this all night, we all get to open one present on Christmas Eve." Alexis said glancing at Kate. "He gets some kind of rush giving everyone their presents, I think it's from too many years playing Santa for me."
"I loved every minute of it, and here is your gift because you've been such a good girl... like always." He bent down and placed a kiss to Alexis's forehead and handed her a gold and green wrapped present. She sat it on the table before her and waited for Rick to come back with another gift for Martha.
"Here's yours... though I know you haven't been very good." He said and Martha waved him off after he placed the present in front of her and kissed her temple.
"That's funny coming from you, Richard," she said after him as he headed back to the tree once more.
"And this one is for you, Beckett, since you've been such a saint this year dealing with me." He handed the present over and bent down, kissed her cheek and she tried not to blush, though she couldn't tell if she was doing a very good job. That was the second time he had done that... or was it the third? She couldn't take many more from him and at this rate she'd be kissing him back before the night was over.
Rick went back to his side of the table and sat down. His hands were folded in front of him and he looked between them all, a large grin on his face and his eyes lit up.
"Not getting one for yourself?" Kate asked while Alexis and Martha began to rip into the wrapping paper.
"I already got my gift."
"What was that?"
"Having the three most important women in my life here on Christmas," he said holding his hands out and she felt a warmth fill her stomach. Did he really include her in that?
She stood up and kept eye contact with him until she moved past and to the tree. She could feel his eyes on her as she searched out the pile looking for the gift she had brought for him. It was on the left side of the tree and she reached in and then turned around to find all three staring at her. The two women smirked at her while Rick had a confused look on his face. She smiled back and walked to the table, placed the present in front of Rick.
"You haven't been a saint," she said, bending down next to him and almost whispering in his ear, "and you haven't been that good in a general sense, but you've been good to me, so Merry Christmas." She turned her head and kissed his cheek, revenge in a strange way because it still made her blush, but at least this time he did too.
Kate sat down in front of her present and began to pull at the wrapping paper with a fingernail while she watched everyone else from the corner of her eye.
Alexis had gotten her present open first. She made a squealing sound and Kate looked up fully to see what had made the girl so happy. In her hand she held a new iPhone box. She jumped out of her seat and almost knocked Rick out of his chair with the hug.
"You like it, I take it?" He said as he wrapped his arms around her. She pulled back and nodded forcefully.
"Thanks so much, dad."
"You're welcome pumpkin." He said and she sat back down and began to open the box.
"Oh, Richard..." Kate turned to see Martha holding a beautiful green and silver necklace. The light played in the tiny crystals which made them dance while standing still. "It's wonderful," she said and reached over bringing Rick into a hug and kiss. Rick was beaming, he really did enjoy playing Santa.
He turned his gaze to Kate and she held it, still ripping slowly at the wrapping paper. "Going to open yours?" She asked and he looked down at the gift in front of him for a moment and then looked back.
"After you open yours."
Kate shook her head. "You first, then I'll open mine."
"You're the guest here, you go first."
"Exactly, I'm the guest, which means you go first."
"How-"
"Darling, just do it, you know you're not going to win." Martha said placing a hand on Rick's arm. He grumbled gently and began to tear into the package. She smiled as she watched his face change as the wrapping paper fell away. From it he pulled a picture frame and he just stared at it for a long moment. The longer he stared the more she feared he didn't like it at all. She was willing him to say something and finally she had to speak to fill the silence.
"If you don't like it I ca-"
"It's not that," Rick said cutting her off and looking up at her, a faint smile showing. "Just, it's awesome, where'd you get it?"
"Jenny took it that night we were at the bar last week." Kate said smiling slightly.
It was a picture of her and Rick and the boys sitting in a booth at the bar toasting to a case closed. They were leaning against each other and Kate had looked over with a large grin on her face and Rick looked back, mirroring her expression. Looking at the picture she was struck at how it seemed they had forgotten about everyone in the room other than each other. She also loved the picture because of that.
"I remember now... and right after that Ryan spilled his drink on you."
Kate shook her head. "I had tried to suppress that memory, Castle. Do you like it?"
"I love it. It's going on my desk so I can look at it all the time."
"Good, I'm glad."
"Now open yours," he said motioning to the package that was in front of her. She ripped into it as Rick handed the picture to Alexis and then Martha, letting them both look at it.
Inside she found a stack of paper bound by a thick red ribbon. On the front, typed, was the words: Heat Wave. She smiled down at it, looking over the cover page. Near the bottom was Rick's slanted scrawl.
To Kate,
I wasn't sure what to get you and I didn't want to overstep, but I thought you might like the manuscript of the first Nikki Heat novel. I usually keep them bound and in a desk drawer, but this one is for you. Also... you may want to look at page 105.
Merry Christmas,
Rick
She looked up at him and found him watching with a small smile. "Go on," he said, pointing at the book. "Check it out."
She picked a place halfway through the book and then flipped through it until she reach 105 which wasn't too hard as there was something there keeping the pages apart. The object was a silver locket with a chain.
She picked it up and held it in her hand, her mouth dropping slightly. It was beautiful. She reached out with a shaking hand and undid the tiny clasp and pulled open the small door of the circle locket. Inside she found two pictures; one of her mother and one of her father, both from when they were younger.
She could feel the tears burn at the edges of her eyes. It was one of the sweetest, nicest gifts she'd ever received and she looked over to him but there was a look of concern on his face.
"I... I notice you hadn't worn your mother's ring much and well, I thought this way you could carry them both around your neck. I didn't want to overstep, really, but I had the idea and talked to your dad about it and he..."
"You talked to my dad?"
"Well, not exactly, I ran it by Lanie and she talked to him and got the pictures for me. I thought you would like it... I'm sorry if-"
"Castle, I love it."
"Really?"
"Yes," she said and smiled as she put the necklace on and snapped the clasp closed. "I really do."
"Good... oh good." He said breathing a heavy sigh of relief and she laughed as did Alexis and Martha.
