MEd20
P.T.
P.
T.
Physical Training.
What an utterly ludicrous concept. It was based on the (flawed) assumption that simply remaining physically active would help maintain, or even improve, one's physical status. This was an exercise in futility because, as everyone knew, one's constitution does not go up merely from strenuous physical activity. It had the potential to improve at periods of personal enlightenment, or as a result of spells. A wizard studying in a sterile tower had the same potential for it suddenly improving, as did a warrior slogging around in the swamp.
So perhaps it was a test, then?
But no, it was probably all pointless, and he used that as an excuse for why he shouldn't feel bad about lagging at the back (only Tali was behind him) as the crew did laps around the cargo bay.
After an eternity, Shepard blew a short whistle. Most of the crew doubled over, hand on their knees. Tali and Alton promptly collapsed to the 'floor' bulkhead, breathing deeply and watching the plating above them spin about.
"Alright everyone, pair up."
Had anyone in the crew not been slightly wary, or totally respectful of the Commander, they might've groaned.
Hand-to-hand combat. That was a worthwhile exercise, Alton thought. He'd seen disarmed fighters lose to kobolds and, in one memorable case, a sorcerer when combat descended into fisticuffs. As a practiced lair (and occasionally con-man, but only when the party needed it!), he knew a thing or two about punching and kicking, courtesy of some disgruntled marks.
He paired up with Tali, because despite all that, the Alliance mariners (they did not look like sailors) still looked like they could turn him into a fine paste if provoked.
Tali had this 'thing,' this aura about her that seemed to put a perpetual sign over her head saying: "I really need a hug." Though most of the crew (Especially Chakwas, and including Shepard, on one memorable occasion involving the mess hall, thirteen sporks, some nutrient-paste, and Wrex's drunken Krogan ballads that Joker liked to remind her of at every opportunity) were happy to oblige, it made brawling with her decidedly awkward. She looked kind of adorable in her little tentative half-stance with her guard partly raised. How evil did these 'Geth' have to be to shoot someone like that?
Alton slipped into a familiar fighting stance, taught to him by Vex, who'd learned it after fighting (and torturing) a(n evil) monk. He smiled apologetically. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Shepard square (or more appropriately, triangle) off against both Wrex and Garrus, one on either side.
Another whistle sounded.
Time slowed to a near pause. Alton knew the feeling well; it was his move first. Time always slowed for the quickest of reaction times. That's just how things worked.
Fighting is a complicated thing, with many conflicting, equally complicated doctrines and theories. It was kind of like philosophy in that regard, not that the two were always mutually exclusive. Alton subscribed to the typical roguish school of combat: Deception is the best kind of advantage, if hiding and stabbing an unaware enemy wasn't an option.
As a bard, spy, and agent of the Harpers, he knew all about how to deceive another. Tongue, movement, eyes. All just a medium for lies.
In this instance, he opened with a slow left hook that Tali was guaranteed to try and block. She did, and Alton took the opportunity while her eyes were on his fist to plant an elbow in her stomach, and sweep her legs out from under her. He punched poor Tali four times on the way down (purely out of reflex).
Poor Tali knew nothing of combat disciplines, bards, or even deception (bless her heart). All she knew was that one moment she was trying to block, and perhaps even punch a very strange man who was nice to her, but babbled on about things that couldn't possibly be true, and the next moment, she was on the ground and in pain. Quite a lot of it, as it turned out.
Alton sheepishly helped her back up and gave her a "pick-me-up," in the form of a cure moderate wounds spell, for good measure.
Though most of the fights around them continued despite Alton's victory, he was able to make eye contact with Shepard, who stood above the prone forms of both Garrus and Wrex.
She looked contemplative.
It was official. Alliance mariners recieved monk training.
Oh. And Shepard was possibly insane. But that wasn't a surprise.
A/N: yeah, life gets in the way of things. For all interested, the move Alton used on Tali is called a 'feint,' and all rogues should use this as often as possible. Look it up. Also, he did take some monk alternate class features, and uses improved trip instead of a sneak attack with his feint (houserules rule).
Why do I abuse my favorite characters so? First Garrus, now Tali? Who's next, Liara?
No. I think not.
