Well hey there guys (; How's it been? I'm so happy with you, giving me such amazing reviews. Whenever I get many reviews, I feel obliged to update fast for the readers. So thank you for the motivation, its not always easy to type a whole chapter without some help from my loveys! :3
On to the thank yous ~~~
AlyssaMaslow - I'm sorry I made you cry, but at that same time I'm glad you did because that's my job (: Thank you for reassuring me and I'm glad that you could imagine it, because that's what I did to get the other three's emotions right. Again, thank you! . xx
chocolate-colombo - I love updating fast because then I feel like I made you guys happy! :) Thank you, I wanted to make sure that you guys understood the relationships between them and how they came to be! . xx
AlyssaMaslow - Reviewing again, are we? (; Don't hyperventilate, I'll feel bad D: Having a scenario is what always makes it better! Thank you for the reviews so much! . xx
PizzaTop21 - I've been known for my ideas, you know (; And please, I beg of you, don't explode. Cliffies are my virtue! ;) Thank you so much! . xx
PsychBTRLover - Thank you so much, I felt the need to show you guys that the boys had to go through a lot to become who they are today . xx
CarlosPenaLuverBTR1 - I'm sorry, don't cry! D: Happy reviewer, happy reviewer! Thank you, I was hoping it was good and of course you want James to be okay, everyone does! (: Haha, thank you! . xx
Magiccatpriness - I do too, they're brothers for life. Thank you! . xx
SashaLovesBananas - Ohemgee, you'll never understand how much I love your long reviews! I had to stop there, cliffhangers are fun! I'm evil and i'm sexy, yes I know this. It's okay, YOUR BABY BOO IS SAFE WITH ME! Maybe. Anywaaayy, thank you for the long aw, it meant a lot hahaha. I've always seen James as the hero, the protector, not Kendall like the show says. Okay, just because you said that, there will be another cliffhanger! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT. Hehe. I love you... a lot. Aweeesss, zit creme :D No more story ziiiiitttss! WOOHOO. Thank you so much! . xx
McGeeklover - OMG THANK YOU! Updated? Check yes. Thank you! . xx
Okay, again to all of my reviewers, thank you so much! You mean everything to me! xoxo.
PLEASE READ*
Alright, so guys if you know about the human body, you know that it's very difficult to understand. So during the story I won't explain it too much, but the Brachiocephalic Artery is the artery that connects with the left and right Subclavian Arteries. It doesn't directly supply the blood to the brain, neck, and right arm but it is very essential. It gives oxygen to the brain and transports the blood through the right arm and parts of the neck. If it is damaged, first there will be an obstacle to getting oxygen and blood to the brain, which will result in either brain damage, hallucinations, or going insane, sometimes all of the above. Along with that, the neck can go numb or will feel strong pain as it is not just supplied by the Brachiocephalic Artery but by others too. Then the right arm comes into the picture, here it will most definitely result with severe pain and random numbness, and can sometimes end with dysfunction with the arm. It is commonly thought to be the same as the Subclavian Arteries, which are the supply to the left and right upper chest and arm, but the Brachiocephalic Artery is much more important. So there you go, I hope you read that because it was very essential to this chapter and the story. Thank you for sticking through it!
As all their eyes met with the doctor's, fear started to intrude. Butterflies filled Carlos' stomach, planting his hand over it, squeezing. His shirt crinkled between his fingers and he looked down at the floor. He was going to be sick.
It was too quiet, no one was speaking. Kendall's curiosity was rising and he tried to gain control of himself but he just couldn't do it. He felt the heat spread up his neck, "How is he?" He blurted out, his eyebrows quivering.
The doctor didn't seem surprised at all as he looked down at his board before sighing, clicking his pen. "Well it seems that James isn't in great condition. Because of the position of the criminal, the bullet was such upwards and diagonally. Therefore it ran up his body for a split second, damaging more than needed, before lodging itself into the Brachiocephalic Artery-"
He was cut off by Logan's gasp. Knowing that he was logical with this stuff, Kendall and Carlos gulped, turning to look at him. His face was filled with fear and surprise, obviously not happy with the news. He knew how important the Brachiocephalic Artery was. "So... his arm and neck... his brain?" The last two words slipped from his lips as the doctor nodded, sorrow filling his eyes. Logan was frozen, unable to move. How could he have been so stupid?
Why didn't he notice?
He saw the bullet intrusion, he saw the blood on the chest. He hadn't noticed the position, he was shot in the upper right chest. He remembered being relieved when he saw this, it meant that his heart was safe. But he should have known, he should have reminded himself that no where was safe to be shot unless it was pure fat or useless muscle. Everywhere was something important and he just had to be shot in the Brachiocephalic Artery. From what he had studied, it was what helped supply blood to the neck and right arm, and blood and oxygen to the brain. He knew the consequences of the artery being wounded. It meant no oxygen to the brain, no blood to the arm and neck. It meant complete disaster.
The doctor could see the craziness going on in Logan's mind, clearing his throat, "Well since it seems that you know more about this, let's work through this. When James was submitted to surgery, we were lucky to find that the bullet was lodged in the artery, not passing through. That might have been what saved his life."
The other two looked confused. How could being shot have saved his life? At this point they didn't even know much about the artery except that it supplied blood and hearing Logan mutter those three organs and limbs gave them pretty much everything they needed to understand. His neck, arm, and brain was in trouble. Opposite of them, Logan's head shot up, a light bulb flickering above his head.
"If it didn't cut through, then it was still connected in some way!"
"That's right," The doctor smiled, "While the bullet was still stuck, it kept the blood from spilling out, so there was no internal bleeding. But of course, it still didn't help that the blood could barely make it through. Lodged in there, the blood was able to pass through by small amounts. James was able to get enough blood pass to keep his brain from being damaged and his arms and neck from going sterile," He stopped, seeing the sighs of relief.
Logan spoke up, his eyes lowering, "But... that doesn't mean he's fine, does it?"
The doctor shook his head and Carlos and Kendall's hints of smiles disappeared. Just as a bone was thrown their way, it had vanished. They got their hopes up, thought that maybe the miracle had saved their best friend's life...
"While he was still getting some blood, it was too small for it to be normal. It was too irregular. His brain is not going to act the same at first. Were sure that he will be light headed and dizzy, probably have some hallucinations and or have dysfunctions with his brain. His arm, it won't be normal for a while. Until his artery can be functioning normally, his right arm will be jumpy and jittery, maybe sometimes not working. He will feel severe pain at sometimes, or at points it will just feel like a pinch, so he will be given pain killers. And finally, his neck. James was lucky. If he had been submitted into surgery a few minutes later, his neck would be limp," He stopped, examining the sickened looks at everything he said. His last sentence seemed to break something inside of Carlos.
The latino froze, his eyes going wide. It hadn't really passed his mind at how close James was to dying or even being paralyzed. He just imagined a bullet wound, a few weeks of work and it would have nothing to do with James. But it had been so much more. He was so close to being lost, so close to changing forever and they didn't even understand that until now.
He felt his legs start to wobble.
James' brain was messed up. His fingers started to twitch.
James' arm wouldn't work normally. He squeezed his eyes as they started to burn.
James' neck almost went limp. He went light headed.
He couldn't breathe.
He didn't even know what was happening until he hit the ground, everything going black. His body felt so heavy. He could hear his name being screamed, but it was faint and slurred. What was wrong with him. His friend was who needed help, who needed the caring hugs and reassuring words. Not him. Why was he so weak, why couldn't he have helped James? Why did he just sit back and cry like a baby?
He felt like he was flying as the world's noises rushed back to him, everything in a blur as he opened his eyes. His two friends were on either side of him, looking at him through worried eyes. They cared so much and he was just laying here, defenseless. The doctor stood over him, checking him with his eyes.
Carlos sat up, rubbing at his head. How long had been laying here? He knew that in his world what felt like hours of darkness was a few minutes to them. He groaned, looking groggily around him. Oh that's right... the hospital. How fun. James needed him, everyone needed him, and he was passing out. This wasn't the time and he knew that, so why was he blacking out?
If he had passed out because he heard the news on James, how was James when those sickening wounds were inflicted on him?
Just the thought sent him scrambling to his feet, feeling his head go light again. Feeling as if he had just sucked helium from a balloon, he tottered. Logan and Kendall shot up from their seated position to steady Carlos who took needy breaths, scratching and gripping at his head. Logan shushed him and tried to grab the hand that inflicted harsh touches to Carlos' hand but it shot to the latino's side.
Logan furrowed his eyebrows in worry as he stared at his friend, Kendall's eyes filled with concern. "Stop sugar coating it, just tell us how he is and let us see him!" The teenager shouted, going over his anger. He could feel the blood boiling in his veins. He wasn't mad at his friends or the doctor, he was angry at himself. He had let himself go weak when it was James who needed him.
The doctor backed up a bit, nodding, "I guess that since I'm going to tell you now, you'll be here a while. So I'll go ahead and introduce myself. I am Dr. Miller and I will be taking care of James for as long as he is in this hospital. His condition is rough but he'll most definitely recover, along time of course. His brain is oxygen-deprived so he will not be himself for a while, his neck is perfectly fine it will just be a little strained, and his right arm with have difficulties but that can be fixed easily. There you go, are there any questions?" He spoke, giving out a reassuring smile at the ending. He was never really happy to give out this kind of news. He only wanted to be a doctor to save lives, not to announce to a family how messed up their loved one was.
The group took in the news, Carlos calming himself down with Kendall's shushes. Logan sighed and nodded, looking downward, "Can we at least see him, Mr. Miller?"
A true, sincere smile finally arose on the doctor's face as he could finally tell some good news. "Yes, yes you can. He's still trying to get used to speaking and there is a specialist in there with him at the moment, working on his neck and arm but if you don't mind that, you may go in."
But he already knew that they didn't care, so he didn't even wait. Before they answered, he started walking, motioning them to follow. Kendall's face brightened up, he didn't even care anymore. He didn't want to cry anymore, he didn't want to frown. And this news was just enough for him to follow through with it. He was going to smile going into that room and going out of that room. Logan and Carlos sported the same thoughts and smile, however, Carlos was literally running, trying to rush the doctor forward. He had to stop every once and a while, getting close to stepping on the doctor's shoes.
When they arrived at the door, the doctor nodded, "You can go in whenever you're ready," Then he walked away.
No one made a move, no one made a sound. Now the only thing separating them from their best friend was a door. They had to go in there and face their fears, to realize that with them James was going to be okay. And no matter how different he was emotionally or physically, they weren't going to split up. Why?
Because even when Carlos was the weirdo of the school, he ate lunch with him, went home with him, and did everything with him.
Because even when Logan was the geek of the school and was so skinny, he stood up for him every day and spent every second with him and Carlos. He accepted Logan for who he was.
Because even when Kendall was avoided and so close to breaking, he was always smiling and unlike others, he wasn't afraid to touch him and interact with his family.
Carlos, rocking back and forth on his heels, grabbed the door knob. He took a deep breath before turning it, closing his eyes. He jumped head first into his biggest fear with the most confidence he had ever had.
He stumbled to a stop, his arms limp by his sides as his eyes widened, tears over flowing. He heard Logan and Kendall stop behind him, placing their hands on his shoulders. He let out a choked sob as he wore the biggest smile known.
"James..."
Laying on the bed was their best friend, propped up in a sitting position. His face wasn't pale anymore, a little colorless but was still wearing a tan like before. His arm was laying in someone else's hands as they massaged it, fingers prodding and poking in random spots. The specialist was on the side further from the door, looking up with a smile when she heard the sob.
James' heard turned slowly, his neck obviously strained as his eyes laid on them. His eyes seemed a little distant, like they weren't well aware where he was and they didn't seem too focused, but it wasn't much of a difference. He didn't have a shirt on, instead was heavily bandaged around his chest. His bright smile suddenly appeared as the room became so much more lightened.
"You guys!" He exclaimed and Logan winced. He didn't sound the same. His voice was a little lopsided, confused as his brain tried to transfer his voice to him. But the smile that he wore was enough for Carlos to up and run.
The boy stopped at the bed, dropping to his knees as he wrapped his arms around James' shoulders, pulling him close. He sobbed into the neck, making sure not to move too roughly. James laughed above him, bringing his good arm up to rub Carlos' back. The latino cried hard into his shoulder, feeling his skin become slippery. At this point, he didn't care.
Ever since he had gotten out of his surgery he was confused, lightheaded. He saw things, like random lights and sometimes people. But then it would disappear. When the doctor told him what his condition was, he had become aware of the strain in his neck, the weight pulling him down. And his arm hurt drastically, begging the doctor for morphine. When he'd gotten it and only had a few seconds to think about his wounds, he fell asleep thinking about his friends. He couldn't care less about his body, he just wanted to make sure his best friends were okay.
When he woke up, he was introduced to Mrs. Latimere. She was his specialist and was to help him learn how to get his arm back to normal. She told him that within a couple of weeks his neck and arm would be the same and in only about a week his brain would be much better.
But that didn't help that all the strange things he saw scared him a bit.
At first, when his friends came into the room, he thought that he was hallucinating. But when he saw the tears in Carlos' eyes, he had never felt so much glee. Not only had he been so happy to see one of his friends, but when the other two entered with a soft smile, he was in oblivion with so much happiness. At that moment he knew that all he wanted to do was to get out of here and get back to his normal life. With his best friends.
Honestly, as he held Carlos, he had seen the looks in their eyes when they first entered the room. Before the crying came, they had that fire in their eyes. The kind that Gustavo told him he didn't have. There was confidence in those eyes. There was courage and spirit. Through those eyes James could tell that they would be there for him no matter what. But he saw it, the hint of pain in those eyes. He knew just what they were doing.
As the other two joined, holding each other closely, the specialist backed up from the group, waiting patiently. Looking down at them, James felt Kendall's fingers suddenly start running through his hair. He looked up to see Kendall looking him straight in the eyes.
They thought that they owed him.
JAMES POV
I never understood what I did wrong. Was I ugly? Was I stupid?
My father wasn't a bad man, no. He was a great man actually. He took care of me and my mom the best he could. We were rich and that made him happy, made him feel like he was the king of the world. Until the one day I told him what I wanted to be.
He got angry, told me not to be a little girl. He wanted me to own his business, to keep my family rich and to take care of them when they got older. But I wanted to be a pop star, a singer. Growing up he said I was a great singer, always listening to me and smiling. So hadn't he supported the decision?
Apparently not. Because that was the first day he hit me.
It went through, weeks and weeks. But I always hid it and never showed it at school, for I was in the middle. Everyone liked me and I liked everyone, it was a perfect life at school. But when I got home, it was hell. I still took care of myself, ate the right foods and didn't go into depression. So the school never saw me as a different person. They didn't see me as a freak or anything. They thought my life was normal. I had the best clothes, the best smile and body. For a third grader, I had muscles that I was gifted with. I was thankful for my life no matter what my father did.
Every other week turned into weekly, then weekly turned into daily. Every time I got home, he would hit me. He would tell me all about his business and if I didn't seem interested, I was beaten. My mom always tried to talk to him, because he wouldn't dare touch her. He loved her so much.
My mother was the definition of beautiful. She had long, curly brown hair. She had healthy, tan skin with white and shiny teeth. She never received crow's feet and never got wrinkles. She was just perfect. She had a lovely singing voice and she moved gracefully. I loved her and so did my daddy.
Then he started drinking. And his sanity went down the hole. He went as low as to start hurting mom. It wasn't as bad as me though, only a slap when she didn't fully please him. But when that one night came, when she said the wrong thing, he tried to choke her over dinner. I remember stabbing him, the look on his face as he turned around with mad eyes. He had gone insane. He dropped my mom and attacked me, ruthlessly kicking and punching me. I can still hear my mother screaming for him to stop, grabbing at him.
My mother called the police on him and he was taken away that day. He was to spend his life in prison for child abuse. He deserved it. I guess I never really understood how one conversation between my future career could ruin our lives.
When my school heard about it, they just shrugged. Why? Because it didn't change me. I acted the same, taking a year to rebuild my mother back before she was back to normal, accepting it. She became a cosmetic seller, keeping us at a good rate of money income. The school thought that I was the same. But on the inside, I was still just as confused and down as I was the day he was taken away.
I was still young, so I didn't completely understand what had happened. But I did know that my dad was gone forever and I accepted it as well, knowing that me and my mother would never feel pain again. So I wasn't too upset about it. Because caught up in his work, we never really bonded much before he began the beating. As my scars healed and fourth grade came along, I realized who I wanted to be. I wanted to be a nice person, someone who could help others.
Because no one ever reached out to help me.
Then I learned about Carlos, the weirdo of the school. But when I looked at him, getting into trouble, I saw a star. I saw a boy who knew who he was and didn't care what others thought of him. He was going to live life to the fullest. And I knew that some way, I had to help him reach his goal. With so many people putting him down, one day he would fall. I couldn't allow it.
I was going to be a singer. I had to stand up for what I believed in by myself, I had to keep myself on track even after every day I was told how worthless I was. And every day when I thought that I'd give up, I had to tell myself who I was and to stand up.
So I'd be Carlos' light, I was going to lead him through the darkness.
When I pushed him down, taking the hit. My memories came back of getting hit by my father. Almost as if I was hallucinating, I saw my father in front of me instead of a bully. I never told Carlos that the person I hit back was my father, not the kid.
As our friendship increased. He taught me that I was always on the right path. That no matter what others told me, to follow my dream. That no matter how many people pushed me down, making me fall back, to just smile and shrug it off. Prove to them that it didn't matter. That I was who I was and it wasn't going to change.
Then in fifth grade, we found Logan. We were told by some people that he was a nerd, not to worry about him. Almost instantly when we saw how skinny he was but how talented he was, that we would bring him back to the world. Me and Carlos were late, playing around. We were heading to class and found the bully pinning Logan to the wall. Immediately we nodded to each other before I spoke the very words that formed our friendship.
"I wouldn't do that If I were."
Carlos threw a punch, Logan hastily landing on his feet as the bully dropped to the ground. I smiled softly to Logan before stepping over the kid, laying my hand on the bony shoulder. I can remember how skinny he was. I made a vow to fix him.
As the three of us became friends, I learned something. Logan taught me that we all had our talents and that we didn't need to change them. Because some day, they would become us. Even if at this moment, if our talents were what made our life so harsh, it was what was going to get us through life later on. I don't have to quit singing, because I'm good at that. Carlos didn't need to quit being happy, because it made his day. And Logan didn't have to act dumb, because one day it would get himself somewhere in life. Logan taught me that everyone was different and that we just had to wear our talents greatly.
Then in sixth grade, we met Kendall. But this wasn't the same. I saw Kendall always alone, but he wasn't hurt or touched. He was completely avoided. And even if nobody could see it, I could. The absence of friends was what was really depriving him of happiness. When sources told me that his father was dead, I instantly knew that out of my trio, I was the one that could connect and help him the most.
We both didn't have a father.
I remember seeing him with sagging eyes and sunken cheeks. He wasn't looking good. Depression had ridden him of any happiness and I could tell that whenever someone walked by, they would try not to touch him. And because of this, I knew that he didn't like contact. Not because it scared him, but because he wasn't used to it. I knew exactly how he was feeling. He was feeling alone, like I had. He didn't have anyone to help him, like me. And most importantly, he didn't have anyone to lead him the right way. I had to be that person.
The day that I walked pass the classroom with Logan and Carlos, I heard what the teacher told him. I knew that we had to help him. So on the way home, we learned that he lived on the same road as we did. We ran up to him and a thought jumped into my head. I mustered as much confidence as I could and when I reached him, I planted my hand on his shoulder. I felt him flinch before he relaxed and when we told him that Logan could tutor him, I saw the look in his eyes. He didn't have much, but just that human contact and the help that Logan was presenting him with, he had gained hope.
That Friday we took him ice skating. We learned that he was great at it, just his physical health wasn't too great. So knowing that he loved hockey like us, then we had to be there for him. We had to show him that he could do whatever he wanted if he could just fix himself.
We went home with him, even after his hesitance, and met his family. A flicker of shock hit me. His family was going through it with him. They weren't happy and were looking unhealthy as well. So I took the opportunity to try and make them happy. With one joke while greeting myself, they laughed. I saw that look in Kendall's eyes and instantly knew that I could be the only one to help him.
That night when Logan and Carlos left, I stayed the night. I explained to him what had happened to me. And ever since then, we had become best friends. I went home with him every Friday and tutored him for a while before we played around. Every Wednesday Logan helped him and he passed the sixth grade. We all knew that he had it in him and honestly, I have never been so happy to meet someone.
Becoming best friends with Kendall, I've learned that I shouldn't be afraid to ask for help. And that when I'm having an extreme problem, to have others come into my life and not let depression win. Because if sadness defeats my happiness, then everything in my life can be ruined. It's known that we are the closest in the group because I was the first to ever try and help Kendall, Carlos and Logan following shortly. It was my first touch, my first smile, his family's first laugh that brought us so close. Kendall taught me that I always had people around me loving me.
My best friends should never think that they owe me. Because in complete and utter honesty, they have given me everything I've ever wanted and they taught me more than I could ever be grateful for.
They were and always will be my brothers.
Sob, sob, sob! So sad, so the POV stuff is over with, I just wanted everyone to understand that EVERY SINGLE BOY is not perfect in any way. It was their past that brought them together. So please, review and tell me how I did, thank you!
